Russian riot led by a chess champion, a 42-year environmental goal and a not-so-bad sex scandal

- Glad to see that bigotry and racist thinking hasn’t totally been eliminated in Germany after all. The country that was responsible for the most gruesome genocide in world history still has some of that bigoted spirit in it, as evidenced by a German army training videotape in which an instructor tells a soldier to envision himself in New York City fighting hostile blacks while the soldier is firing his machine gun. Bronx Borough President Adolfo Carrion Jr. has demanded an apology from the German military because his borough is the one specifically mentioned in the tape. The German Defense Ministry has been aware of the video since it was shot in July but has offered little more than a feeble, scripted promise to investigate the matter. In the video, an instructor details a scenario in the Bronx where three young black men exit a black van and are “insulting your mother in the worst way.” Side note here, but is that not the single whitest thing you’ve ever heard, “insulting your mother in the worst way” as a phrase? Wow, hire a dialogue consultant so you can at least sound like you’re not speaking as a TV character in a 1950s family sitcom, German military. While you’re at it, also try dropping the whole bigoted, racist labeling of all criminals and also explain why your theoretical training exercise is set in the Bronx. Since when have German forces ever been sent to fight in the Five Boroughs? That’s what I thought……..

- Gary Kasparov isn't just a chess master, it seems. The former world chess champion who once battled a supercomputer in a man vs. machine match took on a different opponent Saturday. Kasparov was one of 2,000 protestors who took to the streets in a demonstration against the administration of President Vladimir Putin. The event was labeled the Dissenters March and was organized by a coalition of opposition groups. Their beef with Putin and Co. is that the administration’s social and economic policies are unjust and that the government has made a concerted effort to silence anyone who opposes it. Putin has asserted a high level of control over the country’s major television networks, meaning little or no airtime for those who speak out against him. I hate to be the one to point this out, but Russia looks to be moving back toward the policies and government of its Communist past rather than forward. Take heart, though, Russians, because like America your nightmare of a president will be serving out the last year of his final term in office next year and you can have the chance to vote in someone new and actually competent.

- When I set a goal, I like it to be clear cut, definitive and to have a specific time frame. Usually, though, that time frame is significantly less than 42 years. Not to nitpick, but those 42-year goals just don’t cut it most of the time. A lot can happen over the course of four-plus decades, and a goal you set 42 years ago doesn’t tend to hold up well. Even so, a collection of 1,300 rallies took place across the United States over the weekend to protest global warming and push Congress to require an 80 percent reduction in carbon dioxide emissions by 2050. The biggest rally took place in New York’s Battery Park, where the campaign labeled Step It Up 2007 drew a large crowd to make its voice heard. You can't totally fault the tree huggers, though, for setting such a far-reaching goal. Analytical, insightful thinking backed by logic is not the centerpiece of the environmentalist movement, so cut them a little bit of slack. Also, I think there needs to be a clarification here: do you want the actual cut in carbon dioxide emissions by 2050, or do you merely want Congress to pass a bill to that effect by 2050? The latter might be doable, but I can more or less guarantee that the former is not.

- The Naval Academy doesn’t mess around. The academy has expelled Lamar Owens Jr., a former football player who was cleared of rape last summer but convicted of lesser charges. Not only is Owens expelled for conduct the school deems “unsatisfactory”, he has been ordered to reimburse the Naval Academy $90,797.75. The key, of course, are the 75 cents, because that’s what really matters here. You know it’s a tough school when not only do you get kicked out for a criminal conviction, but the school demands that you give it money for kicking you out. As a football player at a place like Florida State or Miami, you don’t get kicked out for a conviction such as Owens’, you get to move up on the depth chart. At the Naval Academy, you are expelled and you’ll spend the next four or five years trying to pay back the money you owe. In other words, Navy is never going to become an elite football program if it continues to conduct itself this way.

- A melancholy happy trails to Don Ho, the famous entertainer and singer from Hawaii who crooned the all-time classic jingle Tiny Bubbles. While I realize that most people under the age of 40 don’t have much of a clue who Don Ho actually was and why he’s famous, but for several decades, Don Ho entertained tourists on the island of Waikiki and Hollywood stars such as Lucille Ball, Sammy Davis Jr. and Frank Sinatra were known to frequent his shows. Additionally, anyone who can rock a Hawaiian shirt like that deserves props, so here’s to you, Don Ho, Hawaii won't be the same without you.

- Color me misguided, but here’s a school sex scandal I can get with. The reasoning behind that is actually very simple: it doesn’t involve a teacher, administrator or staff member engaging in any sort of sexual activity with a minor. That alone is good news, and when you factor in that the incident in question took place between two adults well above the age of consent, I’m really inclined to say that this is the least offensive school sex scandal in recent memory. Leroy Coleman, the principal at a suburban Chicago elementary school, and teacher Janet Lofton were both forced to resign after anonymous individual mailed out copies of a tape showing the pair having sex in the principal’s office. To quote George Costanza when confronted with allegations of on-the-job sex, “Is that wrong?” I assume the district has rules about this sort of behavior, and if it took place during school hours, then that is a problem. However, if the sexual activity took place during non-school hours, shouldn’t we be celebrating the “restraint” these two showed? They didn’t break any laws and aside from being dumb enough to tape themselves, they’re not harming anyone. And yes, I do realize it’s a sad commentary on how sick and twisted parts of our society have become when I’m relieved simply because a sex scandal doesn’t involve adults harming children.