Sunday, July 30, 2017

Fish-based revolts, The Killers try to shake Mitt Romney and the Clippers' face-punching ways


- Because #Florida. The Sunshine State is where a man can come home to find something surprising - or something that would be surprising if he lived in any other state. Instead, when Warren Woodard of Longwood, Florida spotted a black bear at his doorstep, it was just another day in the life of America’s wackiest state. Woodard initially thought the animal was snoozing or hurt after he met his wife at the garage and she told him that there was a snoozing bear lying at the door. He initially didn't believe her in the same way so many long-married men think their wife is lying about a large, furry killing machine napping it out near their home, but saw the bear through the front door. Woodard did what anyone living in 2017 would do, namely snap photos with his smartphone before using said phone to call 911. Police responded to the scene and according to this photo-loving homeowner, a second officer who showed up somehow startled the bear because the animal jumped up and ran off. Thr working theory at the Woodard homestead is that the bear may have been attempting to avoid rainy weather and perhaps sleeping near the house provided some shelter from the precipitation. Either that or the bear realized his chance of running into many of Florida’s bat-sh*t insane residents was significantly lower if he simply stayed close to the door of just one of their places of residence…….


- Dear Los Angeles Clippers power forwards…please stop trying to smash people’s faces in with your fists. Maybe new Clippers forward Danilo Gallinari saw the example current star forward Blake Griffin set when Griffin punched a team equipment manager in a fight outside a restaurant, breaking his hand in the process and missing several weeks of action. Gallinari, who signed a four-year, $65 million deal with the Clippers in July, moving from the Denver Nuggets in a sign-and-trade agreement, hasn’t even suited up for one of the NBA’s most perennially disappointing teams and already, he’s living up to the Clippers’ tradition of letting people down. The Italian forward suffered a right thumb injury when he landed a punch in a European exhibition game for Italy and though the injury isn't expected to require surgery, Gallinari will miss the Eurobasket tournament. The good news is that he’s expected to be fully recovered for the start of Clippers training camp in September and Clippers doctors are planning to examine the injury soon, but the current prognosis is for a month of rest and rehabilitation on the thumb. Oh, and the other good news is that Gallinari slugged the Netherlands' Jito Kok - whoever the hell he is - in a scuffle, causing the injury that sent him to a local hospital, so he proved he’s tough, or that he’s a short-sighted moron……. 


- How magnanimous of you, Morocco's King Mohammed VI. The African monarch has pardoned some people jailed during a protest movement that has affected an impoverished northern region for months. In announcing his decision, the king denounced politicians and public officials for their "unprecedented irresponsibility." During a speech, King Mo explained that he granted early releases and reduced sentences to 1,178 inmates and other convicts, including an undisclosed number of protesters detained during unauthorized demonstrations in the El Hoceima region and other parts of the country. According to the government’s official mouthpiece/news agency, Mo VI criticized some officials for displaying an "unacceptable attitude" during the protests that have turned into a major grassroots movement, one that was sparked by the death of a fish vendor who was crushed by a garbage compactor while trying to save fish that officials had confiscated in October. It was one of the few revolutions in world history that originated on the strength of scaly sea dwellers and those who sell them on the street, but as this act by the king illustrates, an uprising is an uprising no matter whether it’s about fish, tea, freedom or music. That doesn’t mean Morocco is any less of a restrictive place to live, of course, but at least it proves that the king will excuse some revolts as long as they don’t have any chance of even remotely affecting his ironclad grip on power in the country……


- Well, it’s better than being revealed as one of White Bread Mitt Romney’s favorite bands. That was tough for Las Vegas natives The Killers to live down, so maybe the band that Brandon Flowers built revealing that they have held secret jam sessions with Prince Harry for over a decade is their attempt to make everyone forget about being loved by an extremely square, über-conservative Republican presidential candidate. Killers drummer Ronnie Vanucci Jr. revealed that the prince, who was recently spotted taking in the band’s British Summertime gig, first met up with them after attending a show more than 10 years ago. “He just showed up at a show one time and we got along. I mean, it’s been ten years I guess. There’s been a lot of long nights,” Vanucci said. He noted that some of the prince’s cousins have also come to hang with the band and admitted that he and his bandmates didn’t really know to much about royal protocol. “It’s safe to say we didn’t grow up with the sort of bedazzlement of having a Royal Family or anything, so I wasn’t educated in what it means to know these people first,” Vanucci added. “Maybe that’s what made things cool. It was just like, ‘Hey, man.’” That’s cool, but if it ever comes out that Romney so much as showed up backstage and banged a tambourine once while a single member of The Killers was in attendance, then all of the cool factor from Prince Harry is gone in a heartbeat and it ain’t ever coming back…….

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Bono wants a redo, a bigotry Molotove cocktail in Florida and Riot Watch! Morocco


- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! Morocco is a place where the people’s voices are often stifled by its monarchial regime, but such was not the case this week when enraged Moroccan demonstrators frustrated over inequality and corruption gave a hearty middle finger by defying a police ban by holding a protest in a northern city that has become a symbol of growing public anger. As folks in El Hoceima raged against the machine despite a heavy police presence, Moroccans from other cities and abroad expressed their support on social networks for the protesters, whose Hirak protest movement has become the biggest challenge to the kingdom since the Arab Spring in 2011. In a place that’s a key U.S. ally known for its stability, any uprising is bound to generate a lot of attention. Movement leader Nasser Zefzafi called for a protest July 20 before his arrest last month following a dramatic manhunt and knowing what was coming, authorities banned this demonstration for “administrative reasons,” which isn't even typical government oppression bullsh*t - it’s just lazy. Protesters are demanding government investment in the impoverished northern Rif region, and in a nice bonus cause, they’re also clamoring for justice for a fish vendor crushed by a garbage compactor. It’s a fun hodgepodge of reasons to riot and should make for some interesting days ahead on Africa’s northwestern-most nation…….


- He has one of the most distinct voices of any professional athlete past or present and now, Basketball Hall of Famer Dikembe Mutombo is aiming to make his the most important voice in the room for the Houston Rockets. The 7-foot-2 former All-Star says he wants to get into NBA ownership and is looking for partners to join a bid to buy the Rockets, one of the many terms for whom he played during his 18-year NBA career.  "I'm trying to convince some people about trying to buy this team," Mutombo said. "It's one of the best franchises right now. It's really the right time." Given that he may not have the 10-figure net worth it typically takes to own an NBA team, Mutombo is looking for partners who can "cut the check and they can make me be part of it." This push was spurred by current Rockets owner Leslie Alexander’s announcement that he would put the team up for sale after 24 years of ownership. Mutombo admitted that he missed his chance when the Atlanta Hawks, who retired his No. 55 in 2015, were sold that year to a group headed by billionaire Antony Ressler. He balled in Houston from 2004 to 2009 and after the team recently paired Chris Paul with franchise star James Harden in the quest to overtake the Golden State Warriors in the Western Conference, the Rockets are enticing to plenty of potential buyers. With his extremely deep, occasionally indecipherable voice and trademark style, Mutombo would certainly stand out from most NBA owners and if he can bring a title back to Houston, he’d be a hero in the city…….


- Nothing quite like lighting a Molotov cocktail of bigotry and hate and chucking it without warning into what was supposed to be a typical, bland forum about opportunities for youth in St. Petersburg, Fla. But then again, when you’re longshot mayoral candidate Paul Congemi and you have zero chance of winning and little chance of garnering much attention unless you go full-on hate speech, you do sh*t like that. For the record, Congemi lashed out at an opponent’s supporters, members of the Uhuru Solidarity Movement, who have backed Jesse Nevel as he has expressed support for its effort to create reparations for slavery. “Mr. Nevel, you and your people, you talk about reparations. The reparations that you talk about, Mr. Nevel, your people already got your reparations,” Congemi said, pointing a finger at the audience. “Your reparations came in the form of a man named Barack Obama. My advice to you, if you don’t like it here in America, planes leave every hour from Tampa airport. Go back to Africa. Go back to Africa. Go back.” It was so blatantly xenophobic as to almost be comical, but the audience wasn’t laughing as one woman yelled at Congemi to, “Get out of here!” In the wake of the immediate and thoroughly predictable blowback to his remarks, Congemi tried to insist that his words were meant only for Nevel’s supporters in the USM, not all African-Americans, a spin job that isn’t doing much good for a candidate who really isn't either…….


- When you’re a true artist, your work is never done. For a rock star like U2 frontman Bono, that includes one of his band’s most iconic tracks, ‘Where The Streets Have No Name,” which is three decades old yet back at the forefront as the Irish rockers tour in celebration of the 30th anniversary of ‘The Joshua Tree,” on which the song appears. Speaking about “Streets,” Bono noted that he views the lyrics as unfinished. “Musically it’s great and the band deserve credit for that, but lyrically it’s just a sketch and I was going to go back and write it out,” he said. “Half of it is an invocation, where you say to a crowd of people ‘Do you want to go to that place? That place of imagination, that place of soul? Do you want to go there, ‘cause right now we can go there?’ To this day when I say those words you get hairs on the back of your neck stand up because you’re going to that place.” He revealed that producer Brian Eno gave him the words of wisdom he needed to move forward with the lyrics when the song is released, but sounds like a man who still wants a rewrite. “Brian said, ‘Incomplete thoughts are generous because they allow the listener to finish them’,” Bono added. “As a songwriter I have to realise that the greatest invitation is an invocation.” He added: “‘Where The Streets Have No Name’ is not a great lyric. I just wouldn’t have rhymed ‘hide’ with ‘inside.’” It’s your song, B., the rest of us are simply singing along…….

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

How to deal with stolen coke, Johnny Marr remains an asshole and Khalil Mack cashes in


- And the trend continues. Professional athletes cashing in on their name - surname, nickname or otherwise - is picking up steam and after Dallas Cowboys rookie Taco Charlton used his nickname to lock down an endorsement with a Texas-based Mexican eatery, a much better player with a name he came by naturally. Oakland Raiders defensive end Khalil Mack, an All-Pro at two different positions in the same season, is now a spokesman for Mack Trucks as part of its new marketing campaign. Mack got the idea from Golden State Warriors forward Draymond Green and the suggestion triggered some potent childhood memories. "Whenever we were on the road when I was younger, I remember my father pointing out the trucks that had Mack on them," Mack said. He dialed up his agent Joel Segal, president of team sports for sports agency Lagardere, and had Segal make a cold call to the company. He learned that Mack Trucks had talked about his client before and had an existing interest in teaming up with him. "Obviously we share the same name, but what really drew us to him, based on what we had heard, was that we seemed to share the same fundamentally American values of hard work, family, honesty and humility," said John Walsh, Mack's vice president of global marketing and brand management. Along with Mack Trucks, Khalil Mack also endorses Nike and New Era , but this will be his first one in the area of heavy duty equipment, making him the latest athlete to cash in on the name on his paycheck, but certainly not the last given the amount of money that is out there to be made……


- Use what you’ve got an exploit ‘em if they’ll let you. So says the police force in Surrey, England, where the Surrey constabulary made a flashy effort to pull in new recruits by posting a very attractive selfie of a new female recruit on its Facebook page. The department clearly thought it would attract new recruits by uploading the photo of officer Claire Binksy, yet when users flooded the comment section with all sorts of not-so-clever, law-enforcement-related innuendo, they pretended to be offended. “It’s 10pm and our night turn are starting their shift keeping Surrey safe through until morning,” the department wrote in its post. “If the 9-5 is not for you, and you’re energised and focused whatever the time of day or night, could you join our police family as a trainee officer? We can offer a job that mixes the ordinary with the highly extraordinary and definitely isn’t your average desk job, and a starting salary of £25k.” After the slightly lewd comments began pouring in, a spokeswoman for Surrey Police responded with the requisite amount of feigned outrage. “As a police officer or a member of the public, featuring on social media does not mean it is acceptable for other people or the media to objectify or subject you to comments based on your gender or appearance. “This kind of behavior is completely inappropriate and just reflects the immaturity of those posting,” the public mouthpiece of the department snarked……..


- Stay bitter and condescending, The Smiths guitarist Johnny Marr. Marr is an arrogant a-hole who knows that fans of the iconic, melodic British rockers have been clamoring for a reunion and when a fan hit him up on social media to make a request directly, Marr went to great lengths to be a colossal prick. The guitarist tweeted a picture of himself standing in front of the Candy Darling-featuring artwork for The Smiths single ‘Sheila Take A Bow’ and captioned the image, “Candy says ‘back with news very soon.’” It was a shameless tease, one that drew the desired response when a fan soon replied, “A miraculous Smith’s reunion??” Marr pounced, snapping at the fan to, “Get a grip.” Fact is, The Smiths have been the subject of constant speculation over a possible reunion since their split in 1987 and Marr himself fueled that speculation last year when he revealed that he met up with Morrissey in 2008, a meeting in which the iconic duo discussed the possibility of reuniting the band. He’s since said that he has no intention of a reunion and Morrissey has also said that reuniting The Smiths with Marr “doesn’t make sense any more,” but fans will hang on as long as both men are alive. Such reunions typically happen at the point when all involved parties are either broke and destitute or simply can’t live any longer without the drug that is fame, but maybe the perpetually melancholy band that is The Smiths will be the one act that manages to avoid the draw of the spotlight for good……


- Why is it that law enforcement can't do its damn job and help citizens find their stolen property? If they would just do the one job they have, cops would have helped Okaloosa, Florida resident David Blackmon instead of (or at least before) putting him in cuffs. When this entrepreneurial citizen called the sheriff’s department to report some of his property had been stolen, it shouldn’t have mattered that what had been taken from him was illegal narcotics in the form of a bag of cocaine. He dialed 911 and the self-described Florida drug dealer clearly expected Okaloosa Sheriff's Department deputies to come to his rescue. According to authorities, Blackmon called 911 to report a robbery in Fort Walton Beach and told the responding deputy that someone entered his car and took $50 and about a quarter ounce of cocaine from the center console. Sadly for Blackmon, he is an idiot and left some cocaine and a crack rock on the console and a crack pipe on the floorboard by the driver's side door, making it easy for a deputy to spot them and have all the cause he needed to arrest this citizen in distress. Blackmon was taken into custody and charged with possession of cocaine and resisting arrest without violence…….

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Puig's potent power, Euro horse meat scams and the next Doctor Who


- You have to love it when a burgeoning criminal enterprise is brought down by a small, silly crime that was totally immaterial to the scheme at hand. Enter a group of accused thieves in Memphis who were busted for possessing 27 stolen guns only after workers from a Memphis utility company suspected the homeowners were stealing electricity and narced them out. The work crew spotted an extension cord stretching to the home from another residence and after looking around further, they saw several guns and called police. At that point, they called police, who used that evidence as a means to obtain a search warrant and carried out a bust that recovered 27 stolen guns at the home, including a rifle that belonged to a local sheriff’s office. Nothing infuriates the law quite like thieving one of their own weapons and in this case, the rifle stolen from the Chester County Sheriff’s Office in Henderson was found in a car parked in the driveway of the home. The gang of thieves behind this included two women and two men who were arrested in connection with the stolen guns. A fifth person, Cassandra Rodgers, was charged with stealing electricity, while all involved could presumably be charged with being absolute morons who couldn’t be bothered to a) better hide their stolen guns and b) pay for their own damn electricity so they don’t leave a trail of bread crumbs lying in plain sight to tip off the law to their criminal enterprise………


- The next doctor is a lady. Specifically, Jodie Whittaker of “Broadchurch” fame has been announced by the BBC as the 13th title character in its über-popular, long-running sci-fi show “Doctor Who.” Whittaker has gotten a lot of attention for her starring roles in “Broadchurch, “Attack The Block” and St. Trinian’s,” but this will clearly be her most prominent part to date. She’ll take the stethoscope from Peter Capaldi as the titular time-lord known only as ‘The Doctor,’ relieving him of his leading man duties this December in the “Doctor Who” Christmas special that airs every year. It’s a nice place to pass the torch and there will be plenty of time to build the interest in Whittaker as the doctor as the news of her casting was revealed exclusively on BBC One more than five months ahead of the change. Given the transient nature of the role and the number of times it has changed hands, there’s no reason to fear that fans will lose interest simply because Capaldi is moving on. None of the past doctors has occupied the role for a tremendously long time, so forming an attachment to any particular one is difficult to do. Hell, the BBC may already be trimming its short list of candidates to succeed Whittaker once her time on the show ends……..


- Only you, Europe, only you. Well, maybe a few underdeveloped countries in remote reaches of the globe, but in most places, the idea of a massive food scam involving horse meat would be unthinkable, mostly because horses aren’t really dinner fodder. But in Europe, authorities have arrested at least 66 people in a food scam in which they allegedly sold horse meat unfit for human consumption. European Union police coordinating organization Europol announced the completion of an operation in which eight nations cooperated, with most of the focus being on Spain, where 65 people face a series of charges relating to public health, money laundering and animal abuse. This whole operation took several months and the chief suspect, a Dutch businessman, was arrested in Belgium in April, but it didn’t wrap up until this week. In a dramatic move, Spain's Civil Guard announced that the criminal ring acquired horses in Spain and Portugal that were "in poor shape, old, or had been designated 'not apt for consumption.'" Sure, but all horse meat is unfit for…never mind. Let’s just say that in this scam, after falsifying paperwork and substituting microchips used to identify the horses, the participants slaughtered the animals and had the meat shipped to Belgium. According to the Civil Guard, profits from the illegal meat could reach $23 million a year. Interestingly, this scam ties back to a 2013 scandal in which Irish authorities discovered beef burgers containing horse meat. This time around, authorities in Belgium, France, Italy, Portugal, Romania, Switzerland, Britain and Spain cooperated in the operation……….


- Yasiel Puig is a talented baseball player, but his most prodigious skill appears to be pissing off opponents with his antics on the field. Puig hits plenty of tape-measure home runs, but it’s hard to measure the levels of rage rival players after seeing how he rolls on the field. Just ask the Miami Marlins, who witnessed the latest Puig hijinks in the second of a three-game series in Miami. The first pitch to Puig in the second inning by Miami's Jose Urena was a 96 mph fastball that just missed Puig's left thigh and given that pitchers typically don’t try to hit a batter in the upper leg in the second inning, it seemed harmless - unless you ask Puig. After the pitch, he yelled at Urena and took several steps as some players and both managers ran onto the field and in the aftermath, even Dodgers manager Dave Roberts admitted that Puig was wrong to take several steps toward the mound. "Yasiel overreacted," Roberts said. "It's clear to me there was no intent [by Urena]." Urena went a step further, going with a full-on infant blast. "He got like a little baby," Urena said of Puig. "When he was walking [toward] me, that was disrespect. I play the game. I respect the game. If you do something like that, let's go." Catcher J.T. Realmuto stepped in front of Puig and the confrontation quickly fizzled, with Puig flying out to end the at-bat. He clearly felt the Marlins were throwing at him because he hit two home runs in the Dodgers' win the previous, including the go-ahead three-run homer in the ninth inning, but maybe realizing that the baseball world doesn’t revolve around him and that winning a relatively meaningless midseason road game isn’t a reason to try to drill a guy with a fastball the next day……..

Sunday, July 09, 2017

Russ Wilson eyes the future, Aussies find spare cash and Nirvana: The Musical


- It was one of the more bizarre scenes of angry constituents calling out a politician in recent memory. It was quite the sight as enraged citizens encircled Minnesota Gov. Mark Dayton on Lake Mille Lacs after a temporary ban on walleye fishing went into effect. Dayton found himself literally caught in the middle as boat after boat full of protesters circled the governor’s boat as he tried to draw attention to the nationally recognized bass fishing in Lake Mille Lacs. Clearly, the kind of fish one is allowed to pull from the water matters and while fishing for bass is cool, these protesters oppose the current three-week ban on walleye fishing, which will be in effect until July 27 in an attempt to preserve the breed’s population. “We couldn’t catch a fish because we had these boats circling around us,” Dayton said. “I’m here to emphasize the positive. I’m here to talk about the positive fishing in Mille Lacs.” In defense of the governors, most of the boats and fishermen on the lake were not part of the protest, but for the walleye industry, recent bans and limitations have hurt business and local resort owners and other businesses in the area claim that profits were already on the decline in recent years due to an increased focus on bass fishing, which they say are largely about wealthier people and their giant, expensive boats as opposed to the more blue-collar folks who tend to come out in search of walleye. Still, any time there’s an aquatic battle between a governor and his citizens and no shots are fired, it has to be considered a fun time for all involved……..


- Because who else would you want to make the star of a musical other than the two gone-too-soon frontmen of iconic Pacific Northwest grunge bands from the 1990s? Thus, a musical about the grunge scene in Seattle in the 1990s has been commissioned by the Seattle Repertory Theatre, which wants to shine a light on bands such as Nirvana and Soundgarden. The setting will be a fictional story, but the show will feature pre-existing songs from bands of that era to be drawn from a publishing catalog owned by BMG. Producers will be able to channel the spirit of Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain, Soundgarden frontman Chris Cornell and music from Smashing Pumpkins and Alice In Chains too. One of the big names attached to the development of this musical project is Janet Billig Rich, a former manager of Nirvana, so many she can help keep it authentic. All of the music will center on the story of a prodigious grunge musician and the rival who may have murdered him. All of this comes a few days after grainy footage of a pre-album Nirvana surfaced online this week of the band recording a music video for their first demo tape back in January 1988 and there will always be interest in Cobain and all things Nirvana because they’re one of the classic awesome bands that ended far too soon and given Cornell’s recent suicide, there will be a certain macabre vibe hanging over all of this………


- Australians are awesome - but even they have their limits. They love to drink, party and fight, but if you lose a mysterious suitcase with $1.6 million in cash inside within their borders, even they’re going to ask a few questions. That’s why the Australian Federal Police (AFP) authored a hilarious Facebook post asking if anyone had managed to misplace a suitcase with the aforementioned stash of cash inside. They were investigating a suspected drug heist in New South Wales when they found the suspicious suitcase. “We’ve kicked off a court process to have it listed as unclaimed cash – but if you reckon this cash is yours, we’d be very keen to speak with you,” police wrote in the post. “And by speak with you, we definitely mean to ask where you got a suitcase full of cash from. We have a sneaking suspicion this isn’t your average pay pack.” In response to a comment on the post, police noted that in cases with unclaimed money like this, all confiscated money and funds from the sale of confiscated assets are returned to the commonwealth and placed into an account that is managed by the Australian Financial Security Authority. “With the approval by the Minister, those funds are then reinvested into the community through a variety of means including local crime prevention, law enforcement, drug treatment and diversionary measures across Australia,” they added, presumably before turning away from the computer, clocking out and downing their fourth beer of the day……. 


- Always be building the brand. Seattle Seahawks signal caller Russell Wilson knows how true it is and while he has a Super Bowl win and celebrity wife in his win column, Russ knows he won't always be an elite quarterback at the forefront of the public consciousness…so he’s working to lay the foundation for what comes next - his quest to become the next Peyton Manning. Manning famously runs the Manning Passing Academy in Louisiana and Wilson attended as a high school player. In four days, he learned a lot and has held his own one-day passing camps every summer since entering the NFL. He’s now looking to expand that effort by partnering with former teammate Jake Heaps to create the Russell Wilson Quarterback Academy. He wants his to be not just a short-term camp, but one that offers training lessons, one-on-one lessons, private sessions, on-field training, elite summer camps and even classroom work in which instructors sit down with players and teach them different coverages and different looks and the thought process of what they go through during the key moments in a game. He’s planning on researching locations to potentially hold a camp for the program in China and having worked with 8,000 kids through his previous passing camps, and having a partner in Heaps who has coached 60 kids individually through his own passing academy, the two seem to have a good foundation. Current packages listed on the company's web site range from $125 to $300 and aspiring quarterbacks can be as young as 10 or as old as 22. Wilson knows he won't always be on the field with the students -- specifically during football season -- but insists he’ll find ways to connect with them……..

Thursday, July 06, 2017

Jellyfish v. the world, Blink goes experimental and Russian tennis rage


- People don’t value spare change the way they should. Look no further than unseeded Russian men’s tennis player Daniil Medvedev, who first beat seeded Swiss player Stan Wawrinka in the first round, but saw his Wimbledon come to a crashing halt when he was ousted by Ruben Bemelmans 6-4, 6-2, 3-6, 2-6, 6-3 in the second round. When a player loses a close match, there is a tendency to assign blame somewhere - to oneself for good, self-aware athletes and on opponents, officials or court conditions for excuse-making losers. Guess which category Medvedev falls into? Before answering, know that once the match ended, both players shook hands with chair umpire Mariana Alves. However, Bemelmans did the normal routine of sitting down, collecting himself and exiting the court, while Medvedev grabbed his wallet, pulled out some coins and tossed them toward the chair. "I was disappointed with the result of the match," Medvedev said. "It was frustrating after a big win I had. All the match was not going well for me. So I was just very disappointing. In the heat of the moment, I did a bad thing. I apologize for this." Yes, throwing some coins at the foot of the chair umpire's chair isn't very classy, even if you were unhappy with a call Alves made early in the fifth set, which Medvedev was. He claimed he was just "packing my things" after the match when he saw his wallet and acted "in the moment." The smartest thing this dumbass said in the wake of his childish act that would have played much better with a fountain nearby instead of an official’s chair was Medvedev saying he would accept any punishment handed down. The punishment ended up being three unsportsmanlike conduct penalties totaling $14,500 in fines…….


- Don’t let being an accused criminal wanted for rape and kidnapping dampen your healthy self-image or hinder your social media presence. One man who needs no reminders of that lesson is Derek Helms of Stanly County, North Carolina, a man who is wanted by the Cabarrus County Sheriff's Office on charges of first-degree kidnapping and second degree rape but refuses to allow the haters to bring him down. Helms may not be making himself physically available to sheriff’s deputies, but he connected with those pursuing him by commenting on a Facebook post that included his mug shot. The sheriff's office posted Helms' mug shot and description on Facebook in hopes that someone in the community would recognize him and narc him out and while that didn’t happen right away, the man at the center of all the drama may have made the first major mistake in keeping ahead of the law when he actually replied to a comment on the post saying he is a "great guy." Everyone likes their ego boosted and when you’re accused of heinous crimes against another person, having someone who may not even know you that well rally behind you on social media can be a real encourager. Then again, posting something online and providing a clue for police pursuing you tends to be a subpar life strategy……..


- Ah, the experimental phase. Everyone has it at some point in their life and in the case of veteran punk rockers Blink-182, that point is apparently right now. The overhauled outfit have just kicked off a United Kingdom tour in support of their “California” album, not only their first new release in five years but also their first in their new incarnation with Alkaline Trio frontman Matt Skiba in the place of founding member and guitarist Tom DeLonge. The relationship between DeLonge and his former bandmates has been salty at best since his departure, but Blink is moving on and they saw they’re planning to make their next album ‘more experimental,” whatever the hell that means. According to singer and bassist Mark Hoppus, this experimental effort will begin soon. “We’ve already started talking about what we think the next album should be,” Hoppus said. “It’s been in very broad terms. We haven’t written any new songs yet. Every new song we wrote for ‘California’ and the deluxe edition is out now. We’re going to start fresh next year. I think this album took Blink back to its roots and what it’s all about, and I think on the next record, we want to push that boundary again. We’ll keep the core of Blink 182 but we’ll get a little more experimental.” He noted that the band previously released an untitled record that “still sounded like Blink and had that Blink feeling, but it was different and a little more thought out” and suggested the new project will be along those lines……


- Who’s at fault for the jellyfish? That should be a secondary question, but it’s one a lot of folks want answered now that swarms of jellyfish have descended on Egypt's northern coast, keeping vacationers out of the water and reviving debate over a recent expansion of the Suez Canal. The culprits are nomad jellyfish, Rhopilema nomadica, which are native to the Indian Ocean and the Red Sea but have been turning up in the Mediterranean in growing numbers in recent years. Knowing the threat that was lurking, bathers largely avoided the sea during the long Eid al-Fitr holiday last month and photos of the purple swarms and advice on how to treat stings were regular features on social media, with many noting that the jellyfish have come through the Suez Canal, which was first built in 1869. While the canal has been expanded several times, it’s the most recent changes - made in 2015 - that have raised ire. Those alterations were done through a multi-billion-dollar project that the government touted as an historic achievement and in that spirit, Egyptian officials deny the recent expansion is to blame, noting that the jellyfish turned up in the Mediterranean as early as the 1970s. "It is not the first time it appears on Egypt's north coast. This time the number was just larger than previous years," said Mostafa Fouda, an adviser to the Environment Minister. Still, he said the ministry has set up an investigative committee to look into the "unprecedented phenomenon, though most believe the invasion was likely caused by an abundance of food, an increase in organic pollutants and a decline in natural predators. Either way, there’s danger in those waters and you can add that to the ever-growing list of hazards for anyone who makes a visit to Egypt these days…….

Sunday, July 02, 2017

Top Gun's sequel date, idiots defend Gettysburg and EPO doesn't help you


- His nickname is lackluster, but his ability to evade law enforcement had been superior for more than three decades. Life on the run is now over for Luiz Carlos da Rocha, nicknamed White Head, who is one of South America's biggest cocaine kingpins having reportedly amassed a personal fortune of $100 million. da Rocha  had plastic surgery to change his appearance in an effort to stay free, but his efforts eventually fizzled and he has been captured in Brazil after three decades on the run. He was arrested in the western state of Mato Grosso in a city called Sorriso by agents of Operation Spectrum, in which 150 agents carried out 24 raids and seized luxury cars worth $10 million, as well as planes, farms and other property. The reason police used the name Spectrum is because it fits the phantom-like nature of a fugitive "who lived discreetly and in the shadows... evading police attempts for almost 30 years.” Along the way, in addition to carving up his face, da Rocha had changed his name to Vitor Luiz de Moraes. Still, authorities were able to compare old photos of da Rocha's facial characteristics with an up-to-date ID image of de Moraes and determine that they were the same person. All told, Da Rocha has convictions totaling more than 50 years in prison as handed down by a federal court. What did this madman do? He allegedly headed up a network that includes producing cocaine in the jungles of Bolivia, Colombia and Peru and distributing it on the continent as well as the U.S. and Europe, flying blow in small planes from manufacturing sites via Venezuelan airspace to remote farms in western Brazil, then shipping it in secret compartments in specially adapted lorries to Brazil's big cities or to be moved abroad……….


- Lance Armstrong wrecked his career by systematically using performance-enhancing drugs…so it’s ironic that the blood booster at the heart of his doping program has been shown by a new study to not improve real-world cycling performance. According to the study results, published in the journal Lancet Haematology, show that the protein EPO doesn’t deliver the results many believe. For the study, Dutch scientists staged a bike race up a mountain to measure whether erythropoietin (EPO) lives up to its reputation. They drove a large group of avid cyclists to southern France in a tour bus and had them go through a demanding day of cycling. "It was hectic and stressful, but also a lot of fun and exhilarating," researcher Jules Heuberger of the Centre for Human Drug Research in Leiden, Netherlands, said. Heuberger and her team believe previous studies of EPO in sports have been flawed because participants weren't trained athletes, knew they were getting EPO, or testing was limited to short bursts of strength and endurance. This likely won't change the fact that EPO is among more than 300 substances banned by the World Anti-Doping Agency and some competitors in the ongoing Tour de France will likely be disqualified at some point for using it, but no one on the level of Armstrong, who was stripped of his seven Tour de France titles for doping and he later admitted to using EPO and other banned substances. What’s different about EPO as opposed to some other PED’s is that it’s produced naturally in the body. The reason it’s long been thought to be such a big help is that it enhances the ability to carry oxygen to the muscles and is thought to increase endurance. In this case, maybe that view needs to be revised………


- Score one for stupidity. The victory, ironically, happened at Gettysburg National Military Park, where a self-described "patriot" who went to the historic battlefield because he’d heard rumors that members of an alt-left group would be there to desecrate Confederate memorials. Benjamin Hornberger of Shippensburg, Pa., was trying to go out and defend history and instead, he shot himself in the leg with his own revolver. Somehow, this brilliant military mind accidentally triggered his revolver which was inside a leg holster, blasting a hole in his leg but surviving with minimal harm because U.S. Park Police quickly responded and applied a tourniquet. Emergency personnel explained that the tourniquet was "likely a lifesaving measure,” after which Hornberger was taken to a local hospital where he’s expected to make a full recovery, according to Katie Lawhon, a spokeswoman for Gettysburg National Military Park. Rather than generously removing himself from the gene pool, Horberger was saved. He was one of dozens of self-described "patriots" who came to the national park after rumors that Antifa, an anti-fascist group, would be there. For the record, Antifa has denied those claims they encouraged members to crash events at Gettysburg, because alt-left groups would never, ever do such a heinous thing in the name of bringing attention to their cause……..


- It’s official and we’re all worse for it. We now have an official release date for “Top Gun: Maverick,” the not-awaited sequel to the iconic 1986 “Top Gun,” a movie chock full of homo-erotic shirtless beach volleyball on five-foot nets, noodle-armed throws of dog tags off piers and Tom Cruise at his cocky best. At long last, the world knows that the sequel will hit cinemas in July 2019, a full 33 years after the original. Cruise will once again play Maverick, which is the problem with the sequel. See, in the original, Mav was a reckless, gunslinger of a pilot who flouted the rules and was great because he gave a giant middle finger to authority when in the cockpit. So now, that same guy is suddenly a wise, sage instructor teaching the next generation…huh? This ill-advised sequel will be directed by Joseph Kosinski, known for his debut feature “Tron: Legacy” and the Cruise-starring” Oblivion,” neither of which was, um, er….a good movie. Screenwriters Justin Marks (The Jungle Book) and Peter Craig (The Hunger Games: Mockingjay) will reportedly pen the script for a film that has been in the works since 2010. “There is an amazing role for Maverick in the movie and there is no Top Gun without Maverick. It is going to be Maverick playing Maverick,” producer David Ellison said of the script. Also rumored to be attached is Cruise’s co-star, Val Kilmer, who chunked up significantly a couple years back but seems to have shed enough weight to fit back into a plane. “Stylistically it’s going to be same,” Cruise said. “The need for speed. We’re going to have big, fast machines. It’s going to be a competition film, like the first one… but a progression for Maverick.” Yes, a progression to lameness………

Saturday, July 01, 2017

New Jersey shuts down, beaning MLB umps and casting "True Detective" Season 3

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- Rounding up the next wave of famous faces to staff a coming season of HBO’s hit series “True Detective” takes time and is never easy, so rumors that Mahershala Ali is in early talks to play a starring role in the upcoming third season of the show are promising, but not a sign of an imminent agreement. Earlier this year, Ali won an Oscar for his supporting role in 2016’s “Moonlight” and coming on the heels of his celebrated efforts in Netflix’s “House of Cards” and “Luke Cage,” his star is definitely rising high…but that doesn’t mean he’ll join “True Detective.” After all, the show’s third season has not yet been officially green-lit by the network, although back in January HBO president of programming Casey Bloys said he was “hopeful” about Season 3 happening, adding that creator Nic Pizzolatto was “closing in on an idea that he is excited about.” The odds for the third season are good given that “Deadwood” creator David Milch has been brought in to work with Pizzolatto, but the so-so second season of the show has somewhat stalled momentum for the series. Last year, Bloys’ successor, Michael Lombardo, said he “takes the blame” for Season 2 of the show and the underwhelming reaction it received from fans despite having an A-list cast that includes heavy hitters such as Colin Farrell and Vince Vaughn. Rebounding with a solid third season could extend the show’s lifespan, but another flop could spell its untimely demise……..

- Life just keeps getting better in Brazil. With President Michel Temer facing a new round of corruption charges, his country is rallying behind its embattled leader and…oh wait, no it’s not. Instead, a general strike disrupted major cities across Brazil as union workers protested the president's proposal to loosen labor rules and trim pension benefits. The scene was sizzling in Sao Paulo, where protesters blocked some of the city's main roads and highways and hindered access to Guarulhos Airport, the biggest in the country. To cap the day, thousands more marched toward the city hall and access to Rio de Janeiro's downtown was blocked early in the day, with traffic jams stretching 9 miles out from lines of strikers and rows of burning tires. Tire fires are a solid addition to any movement and people like Iran de Paula, a lawyer who belongs to the Movement for Roofless Workers hammered home the message that workers must defeat the labor and pension reforms because they represent is the return of slavery, claiming it will mean workers have to toil many more years without being able to retire. Then there were university teachers, demanding the government pay back wages owed them. Yes, thousands of state workers haven't been paid in months because of an acute budget crisis and that’s why you had the day ending with about 6,000 people gathering in downtown Rio de Janeiro with banners denouncing Brazil's government and demanding the ouster of Temer and of Rio Gov. Luiz Fernando Pezao, who are both from the same party. Police responded with a typical show of excessive force, firing tear gas and rubber bullets to disperse the demonstration after a few protesters started burning piles of garbage. All in all, another banner day for all of Brazil……..
 

- No one likes the umpires at a Major League Baseball game and no one is there to see them perform, but maybe we can still refrain from assaulting them with projectiles, eh America? That goes out specifically to fans in Milwaukee, where the first of a three-game series between the Brewers and Miami Marlins was briefly delayed in the bottom of the fourth inning after first base umpire Joe West was hit in the head by a baseball thrown from the stands. Replays showed the ball bouncing off the back of West's head as he faced home plate, after which the 40-year MLB veteran called timeout and huddled with the rest of the crew and a member of the Miller Park security team. He appeared to be fine and returned to his position, with play resuming shortly thereafter. The incident caught the attention of Marlins pitcher Brad Ziegler, who is on the disabled list with a back strain and tweeted: "I hope they file assault charges for whoever just hit Joe West with the baseball. Absolutely ridiculous.'' West, nicknamed "Cowboy'' Joe, worked his 5,000th career regular-season game last week, becoming the third umpire to work at least 5,000 games, joining Hall of Famer Bill Klem (5,375) and Bruce Froemming (5,163). He debuted in MLB as a 23-year-old on Sept. 14, 1976, joined the National League staff full time in 1978 and his umpired more MLB season than any umpire, including two All-Star Games, 123 postseason games and six World Series. Clearly, the ass hat who had a beer or six too many and hurled a ball at him didn’t care about any of that, so hopefully that fan doesn’t care about the lifetime Miller Park ban the Brewers drop on him or her when the culprit is identified……..

- Maybe Chris Christie needs to spend less time being a Donald Trump sycophant and more time making sure his state isn't shuttering many of its services due to a state government shutdown. Residents saw the impact this weekend with the closure of parks and other public sites and the disruption of ferry service to Liberty and Ellis islands. The shutdowns even slammed a park door in the face of a group of Cub Scouts who forced to leave a state park campsite and impacted people trying to obtain or renew documents from the state motor vehicle commission, among the agencies closed by the shutdown. Republican Gov. Chris Christie and the Democrat-led legislature are working to end the shutdown, the state's first since 2006 and the first under Christie, but it went into effect after leaders failed to reach an agreement on a new budget by Friday night's deadline. That left Cub Scout Pack 124 of Tinton Falls with a forced exit from Cheesequake State Park, where the group of roughly 45 -- including about 25 children -- had planned to camp all weekend. Meanwhile, police turned away vehicles and bicyclists at Island Beach state park in Ocean County and a sign posted at the park entrance featured a photo of Democratic Assembly Speaker Vincent Prieto and the phone number of his district office in Secaucus, along with the caption: "This facility is CLOSED because of this man." Christie fanned the flames with that sign, which the governor’s spokesman said was because the state’s executive leader wanted to make sure people knew why the site was shuttered……..

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Disgraced district attorneys, free Public Enemy tunes and


- You can put the mom on a golf course where her son is competing to win hundreds of thousands of dollars, but you can’t take the “waste not, want not” out of the mom. Enter the mother of golfer Haotong Li, who didn’t give a damn that her son was playing before the golf world at the French Open and when Li threw his putter into the muddy water on the Golf National course during the first round, mom sprang into action. She rolled up her shorts and waded through the water to recover the putter, only to pick it up and quickly realize why her son threw it away. The club was broken and a video posted by the European Tour showed golfers Tyrrell Hatton and Thomas Pieters laughing on the nearby 11th green as Li's mother realized the club was useless. She got back to dry land and replicated her son’s effort by tossing the club into the water. Li initially hurled his club into the water out of frustration after bogeying the par-3 11th hole. He was playing two groups ahead of Hatton and Pieters at the tournament, taking place on the outskirts of Paris. Maybe Li should have lost his mind and thrown his putter away sooner because he then played the final seven holes in level par using a sand wedge as a putter, including birdieing the 14th hole and finishing the first round at even-par 71. Maybe for the rest of the tournament, Li can simply have his mother caddy for him so she can oversee his clubs directly…….


- Nothing screams capable future leader of a country quite like the rest of the royal family locking you down and essentially putting you on house arrest at the palace. Welcome to the life of rolling ball of controversy Saudi Arabian crown prince Mohammed bin Nayef, a 57-year-old man who has apparently been banned from leaving the grounds of his Jiddah palace and the kingdom overall for fear that he’ll embarrass the country again. Yes, there was a lot of drama in the kingdom last week over the line of succession and that week ended with bin Nayef as a deposed crown prince, but it appears Saudi leaders don’t believe they can take any chances when it comes to their royal family’s resident loose cannon. Not only is bin Nayef reportedly under palace arrest, one of his married daughters was reportedly confined to home , though her spouse and child could leave. This lockdown was imposed immediately after bin Nayef lost his royal standing to his younger cousin, Mohammed bin Salman, King Salman's son. Most around the situation believe the king is acting to stifle any possible opposition or additional drama and in that spirit, Saudi state media has been trying to depict a smooth transition, going so far as to loop a video showing the king kissing the hand of his older cousin, who then offers him well wishes. It’s all a bit bizarre, but in a country where free speech and dissent are stifled swiftly and severely, it’s no surprise……


- Free music is always welcome. Free music from one of the most iconic hip-hop outfits of all time is most definitely welcome, especially if that free music comes as a total surprise on a random weekday in the middle of the summer. World, enjoy ‘Nothing Is Quick In The Desert,’ a new joint from Public Enemy, who announced the album’s release on social media as a free download to celebrate the group’s 30th year. It’s the groups’ first release since 2015’s ‘Man Plans God Laughs’ and as news of the record spread across various social media platforms, the group’s Chuck D tweeted, “We thank you & THIS is on US.” Reaction to the album is beginning to pour in and aside from simply loving the free tunes, many have locked in on the album’s final track, ‘Rest In Beats (Part 1 & 2),’ which pays tribute to a large collection of deceased hip-hop and R&B artists, including Notorious B.I.G., Heavy D, Eazy E, Lisa Left Eye Lopes and a litany in others from a musical genre that has certainly see a lot of its best talents and most famous faces die way too soon. It’s nice to see that 30 years in, Public Enemy is still cranking out quality efforts and willing to share them freely with the masses……..


- Congratulations, Philadelphia. You have the distinct honor of having your city's top prosecutor go directly from the prosecutor’s office to jail after District Attorney Seth Williams pleaded guilty to a single count of accepting a bribe from a businessman. It took two weeks of his federal trial, but Williams eventually broke and stunned the world as he pleaded guilty to a corruption charge, resigned from office and was sent immediately to jail by a judge who said he couldn't be trusted. "I'm very sorry," a teary-eyed Williams told the court as he acknowledged he would resign. U.S. District Judge Paul Diamond didn’t exactly show a lot of trust for Williams, saying he didn’t believe the disgraced district attorney’s assurances that he would show up for sentencing set for Oct. 24. Instead, he ordered him immediately jailed and Williams was led out of the courtroom in handcuffs. A disgusted Diamond said he was appalled by the evidence he heard during the jury trial and declared that Williams "sold" his office, foe which Williams faces up to five years in prison. Maybe this was a merciful ending to what had become weeks of damaging testimony against Williams, a two-term Democrat who didn't run for re-election this year. Why he didn’t run for re-election is a total mystery, but when a guy is accused of illegally accepting gifts from two businessmen in exchange for legal favors, you never know what he might do next. He might even fraudulently use thousands of dollars from his campaign fund for personal expenses, misuse city vehicles and misappropriate money intended to fund his mother's nursing home care - all of which Williams has admitted to doing after being charged with 29 counts of bribery, extortion and fraud. He dodged several bullets when 28 counts were dismissed, but a prosecutor said in court that Williams admits he committed all the conduct. Not exactly what you’d hope for from the city's first black district attorney when it comes to upholding the dignity and integrity of the office. It was a colossal clustef*ck over the past year as Williams remained in office after being indicted, with his law license suspended and a deputy put in charge. Williams even tried to cover his own ass last year before he was indicted by belatedly filing financial disclosure reports showing he had accepted about $175,000 in cash, gift and trips from friends as he struggled to maintain his family's lifestyle after a divorce. Now, his fall is complete and his future is extremely dim………

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Cubs imploding, OutKast plus Tribe Called Quest and new cars for strangers


- Come to South Africa, hire a bodyguard and have a fun trip. It sounds over the top - until you hear that South African authorities are investigating whether any workers at Johannesburg's main international airport have helped robbers who follow arriving travelers and mug them at their final destination in the capital city. This probe comes on the heels of multiple reports of people who were attacked after leaving O.R. Tambo International Airport, a major regional hub, including a couple from Congo who took a taxi from the airport earlier this month and were shot and wounded after resisting a robbery attempt outside their hotel. Now, the airport is looking to identify alleged "airport spotters" who provide information about potential victims to waiting criminals, the airport's management said, warning that it will take action against any corrupt insiders, whether they are employed by the airport or its many service providers. This could take awhile, as airport management noted that some 35,000 people are employed "airport-wide," making it hard to figure out who might be involved in the criminal process when thieves rob people who have driven from the airport. Recent stories laid out nearly two dozen such incidents already this year in which authorities believe cohorts in the airport who are working with thieves on the outside identify potential targets by assessing travelers' clothes, jewelry, luggage and where they came from. Oddly enough, it’s people arriving from other African countries are often singled out because they are believed to be carrying cash and electronics. Not exactly the way to boost tourism, South Africa……..


- The latest OutKast album has teased fans for a while now, so why not add another layer to the mystery? According to one half of Outkast, Big Boi, he and bandmate Andre 3000 nearly teamed up with one of the most iconic acts in hip-hop history for an album that would have moved a lot of units and quite possibly produced some results that would have reverberated across the rap world. According Big Boi, the album was a work in progress, but hit a massive speed bump as the tragic loss of Tribe’s Phife Dawg changed the plans. “Q-Tip flew to Atlanta with Ali Shaheed Muhammad, we all met at Dre’s (Andre 3000) house,” he said. “We got to the point of picking out beats for the album. Then, some kind of way, everybody started doing stuff, and then Phife… you know. It definitely was happening, though.” It was definitely happening, but then it all went to hell and there was no way to bring it back. that album isn’t happening, but as a possible consolation prize, Big Boi did reveal that there are some tracks he recorded with Phife in his recording studio, Stankonia, which may be released at some time in the future. This is, after all, hip-hop, where there is always long-lost music to be found and released at the most opportune moment to make a lot of money and generate headlines for all involved………


- Walking to work is a grind. Sometimes, a stranger takes notice and helps out a person who is trudging several miles uphill, both ways to work five days a week. Such was life for Rockwall, Texas resident Justin korva, who was walking three miles to work every day to a low-paying job at the local Taco Casa and was spotted by Andy Mitchell, who noticed Korva’s daily trek and started raising money to buy a car for a man he hardly knew. He offered Korva a ride one day and heard Korva’s story about how he was trying to better himself and had been saving up for a car of his own. That tale spurred Mithcell to action as he thought about how much he relied on his car and realized how difficult it would be to save up for a decent car on the salary a person working at a fast food restaurant, Mitchell and his friends teamed up to start secretly collecting fund by setting up a donation box at a local restaurant. It took them a while to save up enough money to meet their goal, but it all came together late last week and with their pooled resources, Korva’s secret benefactors were able to purchase a brand new Toyota Camry. With their plan complete, Mitchell was able to present the new car to his new friend and Mitchell’s wife recorded Korva’s reaction, which soon became a social media sensation. His enthusiasm on getting the car is hard to see without smiling broadly and maybe soon, his new ride will drive him to a bright future……….


- Man, that championship honeymoon has come to a crashing halt for the Chicago Cubs. Less than eight months after winning their first World Series title in more than a century, the Cubs are leaking oil, have blown out three of their four tires and have smoke billowing from their radiator as they near the halfway point of the season. Yes, they’re just a couple games out of first place in the National League Central and have a great chance at making the playoffs, but at this point they appear to be no threat to do any damage if they do reach the postseason. The latest black eye came after the Washington Nationals stole seven bases on the Cubs in the second of a three-game series, winning 6-1 and leaving the Cubs just one game over .500. In the aftermath of the Nats stealing seven basis in four innings, Chicago catcher Miguel Montero did what any good teammate would do - he found a bus, threw pitcher Jake Arrieta under it, backed that bus over his embattled hurler and ran him over again. "That's the reason they were running left and right today, because they [Arrieta] were slow to the plate," Montero said after the game. "Simple as that. It's a shame it's my fault because I didn't throw anyone out. "It really sucked, because the stolen bases go on me. But when you really look at it, the pitcher doesn't give me any time, so yeah, 'Miggy can't throw anyone out,' but my pitchers don't hold anyone on." Yes, Montero, against whom opposing baserunners are 31 for 31 in steal attempts this season, really cares about the guys who go to battle with him. The good news for the rest of the Cubs is that they don’t have to worry about Montero’s act any longer; the team designated him for assignment about 12 hours after his blindside attack on Arrieta. Given that Montero also b*tched about a lack of playing time in last year’s postseason despite getting the winning hit in the deciding seventh game of the team’s World Series win, the Cubs clearly decided his me-first approach to baseball wasn’t something they wanted to build their team around……..

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Aliens riding shotgun, "Better Call Saul" gets extended and Taco finds his Bueno


- Future NFL draft picks, take notice: Taco Charlton is your new role model. His given name is Vidauntae Charlton and if he was content rolling through life with that clunky moniker, he would not now be the owner of a nice, new endorsement deal with the purveyors of quasi-Mexican food known as Taco Bueno. Taco Charlton was drafted by the Dallas Cowboys earlier this year and given the area of the country to which he was headed, it was a virtual surety that a Mexican restaurant was going to make a deal with the former University of Michigan defensive end. "We had meetings with a bunch of restaurants that sell tacos and we were looking for a long-term relationship," said Joel Segal, Charlton's agent and president of Lagardere team sports. After weeks of intense negotiations (presumably over free chips and salsa), Taco Bueno won out. The 3,000-employee company has more than 180 stores in seven states, nearly half of them within the Dallas-Fort Worth metro area. "I actually fell asleep towards the back end of the first round of the draft," Taco Bueno CEO Mike Roper said. "But when I woke up in the morning, my phone lit up with the news that the Cowboys had drafted a Taco. We had to do something." And do something they did, signing a man who admitted that he does love him a good taco and who, as part of this deal, will have the chance to come up with some new offers for customers. Future draftees, find a popular product whose name you can rock, make sure it catches on before you turn pro and you too can watch the dollar, dollar bills roll in……


- No proof is not proof of innocence, Brazilian president Michel Temer. Temer is facing a new round of corruption charges against him and he’s choosing to respond with a very, very clichéd and predictable response, one in which he denounces the charges against him as fiction on the grounds that there is no proof that he took bribes. Nothing screams innocence quite like insisting that your opponents can’t prove your guilt and sadly, that was the foundation of Temer’s first comments since the attorney general formally accused him of corruption earlier this week. In an address clearly meant to rally his supporters, Temer spoke to reporters and allies in the capital Brasilia, proclaiming that his career and life had been "productive" and "clean." Given that he’s following a president who was dogged by our own similar allegations, Temer knows that the heat on him is intense. He’s also a career attorney, which means he’s no stranger to such allegations being thrown around, but he believes that his legal background merely qualifies him to know when accusations have a legitimate basis and when they don't. His wasn’t exactly the most rabid defense of oneself, as he ended up coming off more butt hurt than anything else when he labeled the accusations against him as  "an attack on my personal dignity." But certainly not an attack on your competent governance of Brazil, because the South American nation hasn’t seen any of that yet……


- It hasn’t been nearly explosive as the show from which it was spun off, but “Better Call Saul” is proving it has some staying power of its own, apart from “Breaking Bad.” AMC has renewed the spin-off show for a fourth season, keeping alive the “Breaking Bad” legacy after the hit show built around a teacher who becomes a meth magnate after being diagnosed with terminal cancer went off the air in 2013. “Saul” debuted two years later, following the story of lawyer James “Jimmy” McGill, a.k.a. Saul Goodman, who came to run the legal side of Walter White’s burgeoning criminal enterprise in “Breaking Bad.” Bob Odenkirk stars in “Saul,” which is set six years before the start of the original show. The renewal is for a 10-episode fourth season that will air in 2018, but the question fans want to know is whether the fourth season will also be the show’s last. Co-creator Peter Gould didn’t exactly assuage those fears when he spoke about the show’s future. “I will say I think this show has a definitely limit to it. It’s a story with a beginning and a middle and a definite end. I have to say, I would rather have it end too soon than go on too long,” Gould said. The third season began in April and aired its final episode earlier this month, with Season 3 bringing the long-awaited debut of “Breaking Bad” character Gus Fring. Season 4 will have immense hype of its own, especially since the end may be nearer than anyone knows for Saul and friends………


- Kooks are everywhere. Sometimes, they’re riding shotgun with a person who’s speeding through a small town in Georgia, oblivious to the fact that the long arm of the law is about to reach down and bring their day to an abrupt halt. Police in Alpharetta, Georgia had themselves what had to be one of their funnier traffic stops in recent memory when one of their officers pulled a man over on a suburban highway, approached the car and found a certified bag of weird sitting in the passenger seat. The driver was pulled over for driving 84 mph, which is over the limit just about anywhere in the United States, but it was the life-sized doll of a big-eyed, large-skulled alien in the passenger seat that drew the officer’s attention. Police spokesman George Gordon tried to explain the odd scene, but seemed to be at a loss for words. "He did not mention as to why he had an out of this world passenger,” the wise-cracking spokesman said. Maybe the reason he was rolling dirty with an extraterrestrial was explained by the fact that, despite being well over the speed limit, he got off with a verbal warning. Memo to all Georgia drivers and visitors: Stick some sort of artificial alien life form in your car if you plan on breaking traffic laws and you too could get off with just a warning. The officer managed to laugh off the stop and even took a few photographs of the safety-belted alien police the department later posted on social media. Of course, any traffic stop that doesn’t involve a drunk, belligerent, high or raging maniac inside the car is probably a nice break for police, so an oversized alien doll is probably not too difficult to deal with……..

Monday, June 26, 2017

St. Pete likes crude butts and it cannot lie, Netflix tackles anorexia and SEC court crashing


- The Southeastern Conference has rules about students storming the court after basketball games. Do those rules still apply in the offseason when the court-storming is done by a recent graduate who barrels onto the court in his passenger sedan as opposed to shirtless beside his frat bros after a big conference win? Maybe not, but University of Missouri police still have plenty to say after a December 2016 university graduate smashed through two gates and drove onto the court at Mizzou Arena over the weekend. This left-campus-but-still-hangin-around bro was arrested after his Volkswagen Passat was driven through a closed gate on the south side of the arena, after which this maniac drove through a garage door in the back dock area and damaged several golf carts before heading onto the court, where the car's tires left skid marks in several spots. According to Maj. Brian Weimer, the driver exited the central area of the arena through the same dock entrance, then smashing through a second gate near the stadium and fleeing. He left, but not before causing an estimated $100,000 in damage. Police arrested him a short time later on suspicion of four counts of first-degree property damage and second-degree burglary. No one told this poor guy that this is the sort of sh*t you’re supposed to do on an especially drunken Saturday night BEFORE you graduate, not after you get your diploma……..


- Dammit, Burma, Thailand and Cambodia, you all realize no one is ever going to think of you as cool if you keep doing square, lame sh*t like this. You might think you’re doing the right thing by burning an estimated $1 billion of narcotics to mark the United Nations’ International Day Against Drug Abuse, but staging such a public spectacle and sending the photos around the world is merely going to ensure that you never, ever get invited to the best parties. Everyone knows the cool kids roll up their dollar bills and snort the good stuff off bathroom mirrors, not burn an estimated $385 million worth of narcotics in three cities in Burma. The scene was even uglier in Thailand, where authorities torched around $589 million worth of mostly "yaba pills'" -- caffeine-laced methamphetamine -- and the more potent crystal methamphetamine. Somewhere, Walter White is silently weeping. Meanwhile, this drug-destroying threesome also saw Cambodian officials incinerate around $4 million worth of illegal drugs that have been seized in the past year, all three displays capping another year of record narcotic seizures from the borders of Burma, Laos, southern China and northern Thailand. Still, law enforcement agencies across the region insist that this is really just the early stage of a fight that will continue to intensify as producers ramp up production to meet high demand across Southeast Asia. Keep telling yourselves that, guys, because you’re going to need the consolation when you’re sitting at home while everyone else is having a really, really good time at the best party in town………..


- Netflix is getting plenty of attention for its latest film, but is it the kind of attention the ever-expanding streaming service wants? That can be determined in the days ahead, but right now, “To The Bone” is getting a lot of negative attention from mental health experts who say that it risks glamourizing and trivializing anorexia. The film will debut on the streaming service on July 14 and stars Lily Collins as “an unruly, 20-year-old young woman with anorexia” named Ellen and Keanu Reeves as her “non-traditional doctor.” Mental health experts are already lining up against the film because they feel the way Ellen is portrayed could slant younger, more impressionable viewers in a favorable direction when it comes to anorexia and some have asked Netflix to add a trigger warning and parental advisory to the movie. Other mental health experts have gone the other way, arguing that the film’s dark content may make it disturbing and even damaging to viewers and suggested that it might be wise to add an advisory prior to the trailer, the kind that warns people that what they’re about to see is graphic and may not be suitable for all viewers. However, there does seem to be a general, at-times grudging admission that films dealing with eating disorders in a real way is a necessary development in the film industry and at least a few of the haters are willing to concede that both the director and the lead actress have struggled with anorexia nervosa and created the production in collaboration with related organizations and therefore might be able to facilitate the conversation…….


- I like crude, hastily painted butts on public buildings and I cannot lie….or so someone in St. Petersburg, Florida says. The historic city is balls deep in butts, leaving police to figure out who has been tagging walls downtown with a drawing that looks a whole lot like a naked buttock. The graffiti butts are painted in black lines and they’ve left their mark on a series of spots throughout the city, mostly downtown - behind buildings, the bottoms of walls and the rears of restaurants. Banksy this artist ain’t, but at least this would be street Picasso offers some variety - his or her crude paintings feature between two and seven cheeks and have gotten a polarized reaction from those who have come across them or seen images of them on social media. Some are taking a more serious, uptight approach and think there is zero humor to be found in the graffiti, while others have gotten a good laugh out of it and kept on moving. So far, St. Petersburg police have documented at least 20 painted posteriors on walls, though unappreciative property owners have already removed most of them, rather than put a frame around them and use them as the drawing points they should be for their various establishments. It’s truly sad when our culture has gotten to a place where you can't enjoy a truly asinine piece of public art without viewing it as some sort of heinous crime that must be solved…….

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Paris' Olympic ambitions, Norwegian penis-rock formations and bees bee-friend the Air Force


- The military is tasked with protecting so many different segments and aspects of American life…but it’s wildlife? For the men and women of one Ohio Air Force base, taking care of some of nature’s smallest and winged residents is not only important, it’s something for which they’ve been recognized. Wright-Patterson Air Force Base received the Bee City USA designation from a national program that helps strengthen ecosystems for bees, meaning that saving human lives through the military doing its job well and saving the lives of insects and bugs on the base can be done at the same time. As anyone who has taken a fifth-grade science class knows, bees are vital to pollinating many plants humans eat and that means we need them for more than just making quality honey. What’s noteworthy in this case is that Wright-Patterson is the first military base to earn the special environmental distinction, something Wright-Patterson natural resources technician Danielle Trevino traces back to when the base's conservation efforts began in 2015 with 50,000 bees in four colonies. Over the past two years, through the diligent efforts of the airmen and base personnel, the bee population has grown to about 250,000, so large that Trevino says two of the bee colonies will be relocated to a remote area on the base. Based on the base’s past efforts, those new bee dwellings will be some extremely swanky, comfortable places for these proud pollinators to call their home…….


- Who wants to direct one of Disney’s 8 billion planned spin-off projects in the Star Wars universe? How about you, former “Happy Days” star and director of “A Beautiful Mind,” “Apollo 13” and “The Da Vinci Code” Ron Howard. Yes, Howard is set to take over as director of the upcoming Han Solo Star Wars spin-off film, which began filming in February without a title, but with directors Phil Lord and Christopher Miller at the helm. However, the duo, who previously teamed up to make “The Lego Movie” and “21 Jump Street,” bolted from the project and left it in need of a new visionary in the director’s chair. Enter Howard, who takes over with time of the essence. “At Lucasfilm, we believe the highest goal of each film is to delight, carrying forward the spirit of the saga that George Lucas began forty years ago,” said Kathleen Kennedy, president of Lucasfilm,. “With that in mind, we’re thrilled to announce that Ron Howard will step in to direct the untitled Han Solo film. We have a wonderful script, an incredible cast and crew, and the absolute commitment to make a great movie. Filming will resume the 10th of July.” In between now and then, Howard will have to get a firm grasp on what he’s inherited and figure out where he wants to take a highly anticipated movie from here……..


- Bring back the penis rock. So say the hundreds of people chipping in on a crowdfunding site to repair a crank-shaped rock formation in southern Norway after the popular tourist attraction was found badly damaged. The apparent vandalism to the site was discovered by runners who passed by the Trollpikken rock formation and saw that it had cracked and also had drilling holes in the rock -- a development that experts say strongly suggests the rock was deliberately vandalized. News of the attack on a dick-shaped national treasure spurred to donate nearly 90,000 Norwegian kroner ($10,600) to fix the formation located south of the southern coastal city of Stavanger within a day and activist Kjetil Bentsen, one of those spearheading the effort, is convinced the Trollpikken "will be rebuilt" with donated money. In the meantime, police are seeking tips to find the person or persons who did it and lest you think this will result in nothing more than a slap on the wrist in a country where the persons who commit violent, deadly crimes can never face the death penalty, just know that the person who cranked this crank could face a one-year prison sentence for a serious environmental crime. The good news for nature lovers around the world is that there is still time to donate to this effort to fix what’s broken and if you do, a free length of reindeer sausage for you the next time you travel to Norway……..


- You can have it, Paris. The United States doesn’t really want to host the 2024 Summer Olympics even though the grandstanding organizers of Los Angeles’ bid for the Games would have you believe otherwise. If France wants the gig enough to stage an elaborate event in which high-divers plunged into the River Seine, trampoline athletes somersaulted inside the Petit Palais art museum and a bunch of C-level French sprinters raced a 100-meter dash on a temporary track floating on the Seine, then let Paris have it. Paris and L.A. are the only two cities still dueling for the right to/burden of hosting the 2024 Games and Paris’ organizers hope their wacky two-day festival of more than 30 sports will help showcase the French capital's suitability for the games. All of this is playing out ahead of a crucial International Olympic Committee meeting in July that could decide to pick the 2024 and 2028 Olympic host cities both at once -- in a final vote in September in Lima, Peru. If that happens, the bribe-loving members of the IOC will merely have to decide which city gets which Games, though Paris is sticking up its nose at that idea and claiming that it is bidding only for 2024. To punctuate its push, the French government event stopped the frenetic vehicle traffic around the iconic Arc de Triomphe for three hours so cyclists could pedal around the landmark. Mix in a climbing wall installed inside the Pavillon de l'Arsenal museum of Paris architecture and demonstrations of an array of Olympic sports, including fencing, boxing, archery and gymnastics and you have a show worthy of hosting the 2024 Summer Olympics, the 2028 edition and beyond, as long as America doesn’t have to shoulder this waste of a fiscal burden……..