Mark Prior is made of porcelain, Heroes is great TV as always and Philadelphia is a popular place to commit a homicide

- Brace yourself for a true stunner, baseball fans. Chicago Cubs pitcher Mark Prior is hurt and in need of surgery. Upon hearing this news, my obvious reaction was, “No way! I just cannot believe that a sturdy, durable horse of a pitcher like Prior is hurt again.” I mean, yes, Prior has been on the disabled list all season and has spent lengthy periods of time on the DL in every one of his five Major League seasons, with eight trips to the DL total. Yes, he’s had trouble with a wide range of injuries, from his arms to his shoulders to his legs. Yes, he’s at the office of renowned surgeon Dr. James Andrews so much that he’s probably got his own seat reserved in the lobby and has helped Andrews buy a boat, Jaguar, vacation home in Fiji and a new 60” plasma screen with all the bills Prior has rung up. Still, who saw this one coming, news that Prior’s shoulder is still bothering him despite not pitching in a single game this year and that he may be headed back under the knife for exploratory surgery (and probably more extensive surgery after that)….well, other than everyone. When Prior first came up to the bigs, he was hailed for his flawless delivery and mechanics, which would supposedly help him to stay healthy and not break down like most pitchers do. It’s been the exact opposite for this guy, and he’s so injury prone that he’s making Ken Griffey Jr. look invincible by comparison.

- It’s spring again, and you know what that means: flowers blooming, trees budding and Iranian police arresting women on the street for wearing trench coats that are a little too tight and allowing a stray strand of hair or two to peek out from under their veil. This kind of crackdown against absolutely gratuitous flesh showing hasn’t been seen in the country in nearly 20 years, and I commend the Iranian police for taking a stand against women objectifying themselves and tempting their male counterparts by….um…..well, they’re not actually doing any of that. Nice to see that no matter how far we think the world has advanced and progressed, there will always be backwards, repressive societies who take conservativeness to extremes and force women to don copious amounts of clothing and show little more than their eyes. Keep this up, Iran, and you’ll be able to replace Daytona Beach, South Padre Island and Tijuana as the top spring break destination for college kids next year.

- Looking to get whacked this summer? If so, Philadelphia appears to be the place for you, as the city’s homicide rate is on pace to be at its highest in a decade. So far this year, Philly has more homicides than New York, Chicago or Los Angeles, all of which have significantly larger populations. The body count in Philadelphia was bumped up over the weekend when 11 people were killed across the city in a variety of bloody, brutal manners. Residents of the city need to calm down, though, because that kind of homicide rate cannot be sustained. I know the 76ers sucked this year and missed the playoffs, that the Phillies are off to an awful start and that the Eagles suffered a major hit when quarterback Donovan McNabb blew out his knee last year, but no matter how angry you are, Philly residents, offing one another to alleviate the tension is not acceptable. Somebody better keep check on Phillies manager Charlie Manuel, though, because his obscenity-laced tirade last week and subsequent meltdown has me worried that he’s going to be adding to the homicide count by taking out Philly radio host Howard Eskin.

- Want to feel better about the safety of the food you’re eating? If so, heed my advice of a few weeks ago and start growing your own, because unless you personally tend to every piece of food you eat from the time it is in its most basic form to the time it hits your mouth, you’re taking a big risk. Turns out that of all the food ingredients that come to the United States from abroad, only 1 percent of said ingredients are inspected by the Food and Drug Administration. Inspectors rarely take a close look at ingredients and usually restrict their inspections to shipments that are dirty, damaged or out of their packaging. As a result, all types of oils, spices, flours and gums go through un-inspected and are free to reek havoc on consumers. Happy eating, America……….

- Thank God that Heroes is such a great show and doesn’t need the help of a strong prime time partner show to succeed, because if it had need of such help, NBC isn't providing it. Following last night’s big-time return of the sci-fi thriller that featured a major death and screen time for nearly all of the show’s major players (including a new one, Linderman, played by Malcolm McDowell), NBC offered up a pupu platter of reality drivel in the form of The Real Wedding Crashers, a half-baked concept of a show whose participants should be taken out behind the woodshed and beaten with a rusty pipe. Basically, the premise is that real-life couples invite the producers of the show in to create artificial havoc at their weddings without the knowledge of the guests or wedding party. It’s supposed to be a big joke by the bride and groom on everyone else, and at the end, the couples actually do get married. And yes, as stupid as that sounds in theory, the execution isn't any better. Not only are the couples who whore out their biggest day idiots, but NBC should be fined by the FCC for even putting this garbage on the air. Nothing says treating your big, big day with class and tact like turning it into a reality show circus. Getting married on the field at a pro sporting event, tying the knot while skydiving or snorkeling and getting married by an Elvis impersonator in Vegas all think that this show is an absolute classless joke.