- Do NOT disrespect Ecuadorian President Rafael Correa, young
punks of the South American nation. This isn't some free-flowing country where
you can talk sh*t about your elected leaders, flash a middle finger in their
direction and expect to get away with it. Just ask a 16-year-old who appeared –
merely appeared! - to make an obscene gesture at the president's passing
motorcade as Correa passed through Quito. Maybe the 9,000 feet of elevation
deprived this kid’s brain of oxygen and he didn’t realize what he was doing, or
maybe he figured there was no way anyone would notice one teenager making a
simple obscene gesture in a crowd of hundreds, but he was clearly mistaken and
after catching sight of the offensive gesture, Correa brought the convoy to a
halt, got out and confronted the teenager. Officials identified the boy only as
Luis C. and confirmed that he was thrown into a deep, dark hole in the heart of
the Andes Mountains….or that he was detained and later sentenced to 20 hours of
community service for making offensive gestures at the president. According to
the government’s communications office, Correa "got out of the vehicle and
complained to the youth about his attitude," demanding that the boy show
the proper amount of respect to the country's leader. Where did Luis C. learn
to act this way? Well, the government also claims the boy's mother slapped one
of the president's bodyguards, so he clearly has a strong role model at home……..
- J.J. Abrams shouldn’t tease people. It’s wrong to dangle
false hope in front of the masses if you’re not going to follow through with
your promise to do something that would make the world a better place. Abrams, the director
of this year's “Star Wars: The Force
Awakens,” said recently that he has pondered doing nerds a favor and killing
off one of the sci-fi franchise's most controversial characters, the ridiculous
bumbling Gungan from the planet Naboo known as Jar Jar Binks. Binks and his
outer-space speech impediment debuted in 1999's “Episode I: The Phantom Menace,” holding down a disturbingly
large role in George Lucas's first Star
Wars prequel film. Theoretically created to provide comic relief, Binks infuriated
Star Wars fans and some critics
even accused the character of being a racial caricature. In the wake of that
wholly justified hate, Binks had much smaller roles in 2002's “Episode II: Attack of the Clones” and
2005's “Episode III: Revenge Of The
Sith.” When looking as a framed still image from his own Star Wars
movoe. Abrams intimated that Binks might be six feet under sooner rather than
later. "I have a thought about putting Jar Jar Binks's bones in the desert
there,” he said. “I'm serious. Only three people will notice, but they'll love
it." You’re damn right they’ll love it, because Binks has an annoying
baby-ish voice, looks ridiculous and adds nothing to the movie. As for “Star Wars: The Force Awakens,” it is due out
Dec. 18 with a script by Abrams, “Toy
Story 3” writer Michael Arndt and Star
Wars franchise veteran Lawrence Kasdan. It is set 30 years after the events of “Return Of The Jedi” and includes the
returning trio of Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher, along with Oscar
Isaac, Lupita Nyong'o, Max von Sydow and Andy Serkis. Hopefully it will not
include Jar Jar Binks………
- McDonald’s is f*cked. Once the fast food king of the world’s
most obese nation, able to roll out all manner of fatty foods clogged with cholesterol
and having a chubby, gout-infected hand ready and waiting for whatever came out
of its deer fryer. Even as recently as 10 years ago, the company foolishly sold
off a slightly healthier option in assembly linr burrito joint Chipotle, but in
the past few years the golden arches have fallen so far that McDonald’s is
closing hundreds of restaurants around the world and more cuts could be on the
way. One of those cuts, it seems, is to the waistline of one of its most iconic
mascots. The mask-wearing burger thief first emerged as a cartoon
character who spent the 1980s and '90s scheming to steal burgers from Ronald
McDonald, but his lack of muscle tone and cardiovascular conditioning were
clearly an issue even if no one had the guts to say so back then. In recent
years, the Hamburglar went away, but now he’s back in his iconic black and
white stripes, but something is different. Some time in between his last
appearance on the fast food scene and now, the Hamburglar found his inner
Biggest Loser and transformed himself into a slimmer, more modern food stealer.
With CEO Steve Easterbrook trying to brand McDonald’s as a "modern,
progressive burger company” and releasing a turnaround plan for the troubled
chain eatery, the leaned-out Hamburglar will help launch McDonald's new,
limited-time Sirloin Third Pound Burger. The focus is on improving food quality
while tweaking McDonald’s brand images, possibly cashing in one of the few
remaining areas of strength it has left by adding all-day breakfast at some
locations. One California location is running a pilot program that features two
breakfast bowls, one which includes kale. As fhr the masked vigilante pitching
this new image, he hasn't been seen on national television since 2002 and
according to McDonald’s, he’s been “laying low” and waiting for the right
moment to return……….
- Scumbag criminals don’t just play football in the
Southeastern Conference. Some of them play golf. Two of them, University
of Arkansas
golfers Taylor Moore and Nicolas Echavarria, are high on the list of despicable
humans thanks to their arrests for allegedly taking sexually explicit photos of
an intoxicated woman. This dynami d-bag duo have been suspended indefinitely
from competition after being picked up by Fayetteville police and charged with
felony video voyeurism. According to a police report, the victim in the case said
she went to Moore's house on April 11 to sleep following a night of drinking.
It seemed like a wise choice, going to a friend’s place rather than trying to
drive – or stumble – home in the early morning hours. Sadly, Moore and Echavarria
weren't exactly the sort of honorable friends and even in her inebriated state,
the woman recalled seeing flashes of light and suspected Moore had taken pictures
of her. Like many less-than-brilliant pervs, Moore and Echavarria kept the
evidence of their crime on their smartphones and when police seized those
phones, they discovered a sexually explicit photo Moore allegedly took on
Echavarria's phone. Moore is a junior from Edmond, Oklahoma, while Echavarria is
a junior from Medellin, Colombia and because of their misdeeds, the Razorbacks
will be without their leading scorer – Moore – after finishing sixth in the SEC
tournament and qualifying for he NCAA men's golf regionals next week in New
Haven, Connecticut. All of this nonsense began when the victim was out on the
city's popular Dickson Street and had so much fun that she was too drunk to
drive home and planned to sleep at Moore's house and be taken home the next
morning. At the house, she slipped in and out of consciousness, but recalled
seeing the flash of light -- prompting her to later contact police. Had these
scumbags merely turned on a light, then could have taken their illegal photo
without the flash and perhaps gotten away with being sub-human creeps, but
instead they lied and initially denied that any photos of the victim had been
taken before later recanting. They later admitted to taking three photos, two
of which were deleted, and now everyone knows just the sort of bad guys they
are………..
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