- What’s the point of being a Vermont state
senator if you can't extract every possible ounce of (illegal) perks and
benefits from your position of oh, so limited power? State Sen. Norman
McAllister, a successful Franklin County dairy farmer and one of nine
Republicans in the 30-member Senate, is a slightly less successful sexual
favors extortionist and he now faces the wrath of the legal system for his
shortcomings. McAllister has pleaded not guilty to charges he tried to extract
sexual favors in exchange for rent, used sex as a punishment and told a woman
they could both earn extra money if she had sex with farm workers. Aside from
being a great way to boost the morale of your farm workers, such actions are
apparently illegal and so the second-term senator was arrested Thursday outside
the statehouse. Among the nuggets in court records released after Friday's
arraignment was a transcript of a recorded call in which McAllister and a woman
who rents property from him talk about the extra money she could earn if she
went to other farms to have sex with farm workers. This could clearly be one of
the reasons the senator has become such a successful dairy farmer and he responds
"yes" when the woman says he would take half of what she earned from
the sex to help pay her rent. “That's totally up to you. I mean, we were trying
to figure out a way to get you money,” the skeevy senator stated. Yet
McAllister is also accused of forcing the woman to allow him to perform a
sexual act on her as punishment when a worker was injured while teaching her
how to drive a tractor. According to the accuser, she had sex with McAllister
once or twice a month and said she felt she had to do it to keep her housing. A
second woman who worked for McAllister on his farm said the sexual acts were
"definitely not" consensual and said in chilling fashion that, "I
was screaming no at him and he still ... went for it.” Not really what you’re looking
for from your elected officials……..
-Anonymous surveys of professional athletes are the best.
They can be totally fictionalized, numbers can be altered or manipulated and in
the event they are actually legitimate, they provide a glimpse into an honest
reaction from a player in any sport about subjects they normally wouldn’t touch
with a pole vault pole. In the case of golfer Rickie Fowler, they can yield an
awkward situation in which a millionaire professional athlete is bumping around
on Twitter and comes across his own name in a post on a Sports Illustrated player poll in which he
shared the dubious distinction of being voted the PGA Tour's most overrated
pro. Fowler, though, had the wherewithal to not respond in the prideful way
that many athletes in his position would. His version of events may or may not
be totally accurate, but what’s clear is that he didn’t thumb out a vitriolic
tweet vowing to find out who the hell voted for him and make them pay. "I
laughed," Fowler said. “I thought it was funny." He probably didn’t
think it was funny, but he didn’t need to fire back because there have been
quite a few people who have risen to his defense on social media. Others have
taken the other extreme in the debate, ignoring the fact that just last year,
Fowler joined only Jack Nicklaus and Tiger Woods as players in the modern era
to finish top-five in all four majors. Hell, he’s currently ranked a solid 13th
in the world and although he’s only won one tournament in six PGA Tour seasons and
none in his past 70 starts, no one ever pegged him as the man to make the golf
world forget about Tiger Woods. "It's fine by me," Fowler added.
"I'm going to try and play as well as I can this week and I'm going to
take care of my business." All righty, then……..
- Depending on who you ask, Guatemala's vice
president is either a really bad person or a really, really bad person.
Entrants into both categories will be thrilled with the news that Roxana Baldetti
has resigned amid a customs corruption scandal that implicated her former
private secretary and opened her up to an investigation. Baldetti said in a
resignation letter that the move means she is giving up her immunity from
prosecution and promised "to collaborate with all investigations"
into the graft scheme and her former boss, President Oscar Perez Molina, called
the decision "brave.” It may not be the sort of history one usually wants
to make, but Baldetti is the first Guatemalan vice president to step down due
to a corruption case. So far, prosecutors have not implicated her in the
scandal and she denies involvement, but when she is indicted, she can thank a United
Nations commission that has been investigating criminal networks and fighting
impunity in Guatemala since 2007. Taking eight years to produce any significant
results might seem like typical government bureaucracy on an international
level….and it is. Still, it’s hard to imagine Baldetti being innocent when he former
aide, Juan Carlos Monzon Rojas, is alleged to have been the ringleader of a
scheme to defraud the state of millions of dollars by taking bribes in exchange
for lower customs duties. Monzon's last known whereabouts were overseas and authorities
are seeking him as you read this, but it is Baldetti who is facing the most
heat right now and finally decided to step down amidst rising calls for her
resignation by protesters and influential business leaders. The country's
Constitutional Court ruled that congress would have the power to strip her of
the immunity from prosecution that came with her office and her resignation
sparked massive celebrations in the street, with revelers shooting off
firecrackers, honking horns and chanting, "Roxana's resignation is a
victory for the people!" Many crowded the central Constitution Square and
Molina moved quickly to turn the page, announcing that d he would send congress
a list of three names from which a new vice president can be selected. Baldetti
is far from the only (allegedly) corrupt civil servant here, as at least 50
people, including many public officials, are suspects in the customs scandal.
It’s a far-reaching scandal that has shaken faith in an already shaky government and put Guatemala on the map
in all the wrong ways………..
- Life is rarely fair. People who do bad things often get
away with their evil deeds and folks who do good frequently receive the sort of
unjust harvest that should come to the true scumbags of the world. Navid Farsi
is one of those people and it’s clear which of the two groups he falls into. You
might know Farsi’s name because he threw a rock at Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson in
April, but not all of his acts of late have been so d-baggish. For example, he threw
a bag of powdered sugar at Maroon 5 lead man bander and reality karaoke judge
Adam Levine prior to an appearance on “Jimmy Kimmel Live.” Levine was covered
in the white powder as he signed autographs for fans and it was a truly
heartwarming moment for everyone with even a shred of musical taste and who
therefore despises Levine and his overly coiffed, poseur self and his hack man
band with instruments with every fiber of their being. Sadly, Levine decided to
press charges and Farsi was charged with battery and convicted, with a sentence
of three years of probation, 52 counseling sessions and 20 days cleaning
California's highways. If there were real justice in this world, it would be
Levine picking up trash with a pointy stick alongside the 405 for foisting
“Moves Like Jagger” and similarly sh*tty songs on the world. Instead, a second
count of battery involved a security guard who was also covered by the powdered
sugar and Farsi has also been ordered to stay 500 yards from the Jimmy Kimmel
Live set with a protective order making it illegal for him to approach Levine
in the future. Oddly, if you’re not approaching Levine to cover him in some
sort of baking product as a means of vengeance, then there really is no point
in being near him anyhow………
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