Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Calling Bernie Sanders a Nazi, Sex Pistol v. pork chop and Venezuelan political hijinks


- Venezuelan despot/Presidente Nicolas Maduro is at it again. The tyrannical leader routinely tramples the basic rights and freedoms of those around and beneath his iron-fisted rule, so the real question is not if, but when he’ll be abusing his power next. The latest target is Venezuela's biggest businessman, who has probably done nothing wrong in this particular situation other than offending his think-skinned leader, but is nonetheless facing presidential calls for prosecution of for allegedly conspiring to destabilize Maduro’s  socialist government. Lorenzo Mendoza is president of the Empresas Polar conglomerate that is the nation's largest food supplier and his life became much more complicated last week when state (i.e. sympathetic to Maduro) TV aired a phone conversation of Mendoza with a Harvard University professor who suggested the oil-rich nation needs a $40 billion International Monetary Fund bailout to pull out of a worsening fiscal crisis marked by triple-digit inflation and major economy shrinkage. That economist, Venezuelan Ricardo Hausmann, pointed to an estimated 10 percent shrinking of the Venezuelan economy this year and that’s a sore spot for the Maduro regime. In response, the dictator whined to the same state TV station that Mendoza seemed to be speaking on behalf of the government and conspiring with its opponents. In a very logical response, Mendoza explained that he regularly speaks to economists across the political spectrum. He boldly went on to accuse the government of violating his privacy, which is a great way to encourage the Maduro regime to violate much more than privacy………


- Professional athletes getting paid for doing nothing more than running on underwater treadmills and receiving electrical stimulation in a physical therapist’s office is nothing new. Athletes signing multimillion dollar deals, then getting hurt and rehabbing is a way of life in pro sports, but the way Cleveland Browns cornerback Ifo Ekpre-Olomu collected $3 million on Monday was a new twist on the idea. Ekpre-Olomu, then a cornerback for the University of Oregon, tore his ACL in practice two weeks before the college football semifinal playoff game at the Rose Bowl against Florida State. As a result, a player projected to be picked among the top 12 in the first round of the NFL draft slipped to the seventh round. The good news for Ekpre-Olomu is that he bought a loss of value insurance policy prior to his senior season. The policy insures the player if he slips in the draft and means that he receives a payment of half the value of what he would have gotten had he not gotten hurt and therefore been picked higher in the draft. The first team All-America cornerback, who revealed soon after the draft that he had also dislocated his knee and is expected to miss the entire 2015 season for the Browns, cashed in on his policy this week with a $3 million payment because he lost at least 50 percent of his value. Loss of value policies are attached to permanent disability policies and they’re nothing new. In this case, Ekpre-Olomu will collect $3 million, but he can still play the “What if?” game because his injury still cost him about $4 million as a likely top-12 pick……….


- Mission successful, Texas State Rep. Jason Villalba, R-Dallas. Before last week, no one knew or gave a damn who Texas State Rep. Jason Villalba, R-Dallas was. This week, pretty much no one cares, but at least we all know who you are. You’re that ass hat who felt the need to weigh in on the Democratic presidential race by tweeting that, "Bernie Sanders admits he is a Democratic Socialist. … Nazis were Democratic Socialists." Uh-oh. Nothing says, “Hey world, look at me!” quite like a misplaced Nazi analogy. The obvious question here is why a lowly, anonymous state representative from Texas felt the need to weigh in on the Democratic presidential race. The next person who can explain why Villalba’s opinion on this - or any other - topic not pertaining to what he puts on his turkey sammitches and how to govern his district is relevant will be the first. Villalba’s ill-fated rant began during the first Democratic presidential debate. "The modern Democrat Party is filled with Democratic Socialists and soft socialists. Is this where we are in America?" Villalba tweeted. He went on to post an image of what looked like an old document stating: "That awkward moment when … 1) Bernie Sanders admits he is a Democratic Socialist. 2) Nazis were Democratic Socialists 3) America fought an entire World War to stop the advance of Democratic Socialists. Sincerely, Sane Americans." Oh, you posted that on behalf of sane Americans? It’s all good then, J-Money. Villalba later claimed the meme was one he found online and that he “absolutely (was) not” trying to link Sanders and Adolf Hitler’s Nazi Party. Sorry my man, but that’s exactly what you did. Rather than deny it, own it because it’s the only reason anyone outside your district knows your name……….


- Punk rockers are supposed to be wild, crazy badasses who can drink like they have four livers and snort drugs like a Shop Vac. They’re not supposed to be terrified of something lurking inside the well-lit confines of the refrigerated cases at the deli counter in their local butcher shop. John Lydon doesn’t seem to subscribe to this theory, otherwise he wouldn’t be sharing the revelation that he’s deadly afraid of pork chops. The former Sex Pistols frontman says he "can't go near a pork chop" because of a lifelong phobia of the meat product based on a serious case of meningitis during his childhood. "I caught meningitis at seven. I went into a coma for three months and stayed for much of a year," Lydon said. "I'd had a pork chop the night before I was hospitalized and I've associated pork chops with illness to this day." The power of association is a strong and dangerous thing and yet, the idea of fans being able to badly rattle one of the most iconic frontmen and biggest wild men in punk rock not by doing anything outlandish, but by hurling a freshly cut hunk of pork at the stage during a show, is hilarious. Yet even through he can’t "go near a pork chop" now, Lydon isn't entirely terrified of all pork products. He added that "nothing will keep me away from my smoky bacon,” which makes sense because no matter your nationality or rock star status, there is no day in the world that cannot be made better by the magical, mystical and salty power of a slice of bacon……..

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