Saturday, February 07, 2015

Idiots shouldn't parent, James Bond gets injured and Cuban baseball stars want to escape


- Political stances change, but the reality remains the same for Cuban baseball players fortunate enough to escape their communist island home for international tournaments. Even with the United States electing to take major steps to improve U.S.-Cuba relations and removing some restrictions that have existed over the years, Cuban baseball players still want to flee for freedom any chance they get and 19-year-old pitcher Vladimir Gutierrez and 29-year-old shortstop Dainer Moreira are the latest to jump on board the freedom train. The two men were in Puerto Rico for the Caribbean Series when they (allegedly) abandoned their team mid-tournament, Cuba's team announced. Gutierrez had not yet played in the series, but Moreira batted in Cuba's only run against the Dominican Republic and it seems he won't be batting in any more runs wearing a Cuban jersey. The apparent effort to jump ship came less than 24 hours after Major League Baseball eliminated its requirement that Cuban players obtain a license from the U.S. government before they are eligible to sign with big league teams. Cuba, to say the least, was not pleased with the development. "That decision is a betrayal to the revolution, to their family, to their homeland. It's an exchange of shame for money," said Jorge Polo, vice president of Cuba's National Institute of Sports, Physical Education and Recreation. In spite of the outrage, Caribbean Confederation of Professional Baseball commissioner Juan Francisco Puello said in a statement that the confederation will not get involved. "This is a private matter," he said. "They are under no obligation to report anything to us." Maybe Cuba should have known better than to send its players to Puerto Rico, which is an American territory where Cubans who make it to the island generally can apply for legal U.S. residency, but the Cuban government has been fighting a losing battle against this issue for a long time……….


- Way to step out of the Stone Age, Poland – albeit reluctantly. The eastern European nation is being dragged kicking and screaming into semi-modern times by the rest of Europe and clearly, there is serious opposition to Polish societal progress. That much was evident after Poland's lawmakers approved a European convention against domestic violence following a heated debate that saw many legislators fight for their nation’s right to continue looking the other way when men get violent with their ladies. Parliament voted 254-175 with eight abstentions on Friday to empower President Bronislaw Komorowski to sign into law the 2011 Council of Europe's convention, aimed at combating violence against women and domestic violence. Specifically, the law requires governments and organizations to penalize such violence and help victims. Why would anyone be fighting against such a measure, knowing it amounts to condoning the smacking around of women and children for no defensible reason? For that answer ask right-wing and Catholic lawmakers who argued some of the regulations undermined Poland's traditional roles of mother and father in the family. Wait…a man can't be the father he needs to be if he can't get violent with it in order to get his wife or children to comply with his orders, or if he can’t smack someone around when he has a sh*tty day at the factory? Others claimed the convention’s section about education would promote confused notions about gender because it says that children should be taught about "non-stereotype roles" in the society and culture. Holding on to traditional values is one thing, but defending one’s right to ignore the truth and abuse others is something else entirely. Stay classy, Poles………


- This is why stunt doubles exist. Daniel Craig is the current face of the James Bond franchise and while he’s not the best Bond ever, he’s a drastic improvement over scrubs like Pierce Brosnan and Timothy Dalton. As such, it’s a good idea to keep him upright and able-bodied until the next movie in the series is complete, something producers of “Spectre” have clearly failed to do. It seems Craig injured his knee earlier this week while shooting a fight scene for new Bond movie, forcing production to be shut down and extras to be sent home because no one gives a damn about them if Craig isn’t filling the screen. Craig’s spokesman confirmed the setback, but insisted any impact on the filming schedule will be minimal. "Daniel Craig sustained a knee sprain this week while shooting a fight sequence on the set of Spectre. He will be filming on Saturday as planned,” the spokesman said in a statement. Look at Danny Craig, trying to attack this like a professional athlete who just sustained an on-field injury but is gamely looking to gut it out, play through pain and make sure he’s there for his team. At least one interested party saw news of the injury and chimed in with his thoughts. Former Bond star Sir Roger Moore, i.e. one of the field old people who know how to properly utilize the Twitter, tweeted out, “Sorry to hear Daniel Craig has sprained his knee on set #Spectre. Being 007 is not without its hazards. I'm available to step in if needed.” Thanks for the offer, Rog. And if this were a Brosnan-starring Bond movie, your offer would be a major upgrade. Instead, director Sam Mendes can sweat this one out along with Craig’s co-stars Naomie Harris (Moneypenny), Ben Whishaw (Q), Rory Kinnear (Bill Tanner) and Ralph Fiennes (M). The movie is about a “cryptic message from Bond’s past” that “sends him on a trail to uncover a sinister organization,” according to the official plot synopsis. Sounds great, but how the hell is Bond going to kick ass when he may only have one good leg to stand on………


- Parenting is a subjective artform. Many diffeent people approach it in varying ways and a large number of those methods have proven successful….and then there’s Troy, Missouri resident Elizabeth Hupp. Happ, her sister Denise Kroutil and their mother, like many parents and grandparents, took a good, hard look at Happ’s son and decided that he wasn’t nearly as aware as he should be about the dangers posed by strangers. Knowing that naïvete could evenutally lead the boy into the backseat of a child sex offender, Happ and her co-conspirators decided that it was time to scare the living sh*t out of a 6-year-old boy with a plan barely more intelligent than the one Tonya Harding and her goons hatched back in 1994 when they wanted to steal Nancy Kerrigan’s spot on the Olympic team. Happ, Denise Kroutil and Rose Brewer plotted with one of Kroutil’s co-workers, Nathan Firoved, to kidnap the boy and show him the hard truths about the world. To drive out the boy’s tendency to be “too nice” to people, Kroutil asked Firoved to kidnap her nephew to “scare” him. According to police, Firoved parked his pickup truck by the boy’s bus stop and waited for him to be dropped off after school. He Jedi mind-tricked the boy into his truck and drove off, telling the boy he would never see his mother again and he would be “nailed to the wall of a shed.” When the boy cried, Firoved pulled out a handgun and threatened him before eventually binding the boy with plastic bags and covering his head with a jacket. But wait, there’s more. Kroutil then entered the basement where the boy was kept, pulled down the child’s pants and uttered scarring words the boy probably won't shake any time soon, telling him he could be sold into sex slavery. Later, these Mensas unbound the boy and lectured him on the danger of strangers – leaving out the dangers posed by having a family of morons. The boy showed the best smarts in the crew, telling school officials the next day. The Missouri Division of Family Services got involved and now, Firoved, Brewer and Koutil have been charged with kidnapping, felonious restraint, and abuse/neglect of a child. As always, not everyone is qualified to parent………

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