- It wasn’t the resolution I was hoping for as the NFL considered a moronic rule change proposal to restrict the length of hair players are allowed to wear, but it’s better than said rule being adopted right now. At the NFL owners’ meetings in Palm Beach, Fla., the terrible proposal by the Kansas City Chiefs calling for all players to tuck or cut long hair so it doesn't hang below the nameplate on their uniform was tabled until the next NFL owners meeting in May. The rule is pathetic and a shameless attempt by the Chiefs to gain retribution for a personal foul penalty called against Chiefs’ running back Larry Johnson for a by-the-hair tackle of long-locked Pittsburgh safety Troy Polamalu back in 2006. By delaying a vote on the issue, the league will give the NFL Players Association, which has rightly vowed to fight the rule, a chance to speak out on the issue. A defender of the new rule is a guy I love as a coach and a person, Chiefs’ coach Herm Edwards. “We had a pretty good feeling it was going to get tabled,” Edwards said at the NFL owners meetings. “We have to take it to the union to consider. That's OK. I think as long as the players know they can discuss it. Basically what we're looking at is a discussion. In our opinion, it's a violation of the dress code.” Your opinion is wrong, Herm. I know we usually say that opinions can't be right or wrong, but yours is wrong. You may be a 50-something dude who doesn’t like long hair, but you need to back off. The Chiefs’ proposal was submitted in early March, and players had not had a chance to discuss the issue before this week's NFL meetings. “There is a certain way we feel the uniform should be portrayed," Edwards said. “That's why we brought it up. I think we are all naïve if we don't know who those guys are. We are talking about uniform violations in our opinions. There were a lot of years players didn't have names on the backs of their jerseys. All of a sudden, you get it, and you cover it up. When I was growing up playing football, you looked at pro football players and said, 'I can't wait to get my name on the jersey.' Now, you get it on the back and you cover it up.” Are you f’ing kidding me? That’s what you’re going with? With a straight face? The “guys need to have pride in having their names on their jerseys” card? No way. That’s just pathetic, period. You don’t know who guys are if their name isn’t on their uniform? You mean the large-print uniform numbers on the front and back and the endless supply of rosters and media guides don’t help you adequately identify players? Nice try, Herm. The real heart of your beef is in the sentence where you say that YOU have a certain way YOU feel the uniform should be worn. Well guess what? You don’t run the NFL and you shouldn’t be trying to impose rules restricting players’ freedom on the basis of needless, arbitrary reasons. Next!
- Thank God that’s over. April Fool’s Day, a.k.a. the day for morons with über-juvenile senses of humor to play moronic, lame pranks on others, has passed. Undoubtedly, you encountered someone during your day yesterday who has failed to progress past the age of six, maturity-wise, and thought it would be really fresh to glue your stapler to your desk, put a whoopee cushion on your chair or tell you that your car had been towed - only to hit you with “April Fool’s!” and laugh like they’re at a freaking Chris Rock concert. I say this without equivocation or hesitation: if you pulled even on April Fool’s prank or joke yesterday, you are a loser. You may drive a Ferrari, live in a $5 million home and be married to a supermodel, but if you took part in a single “hilarious” stunt centered around the April Fool’s theme, you’re a loser, no questions asked. People who are actually funny don’t need a lame, faux holiday to help prop up their humor. Those of us who have a sense of humor can be funny year-round, without the crutch of April Fool’s Day. Hopefully you aren’t one of the people I’m talking about and if you are, right the ship and circle April 1 on your calendar for next year so you can be sure not to repeat your mistake.
- Simmer down, people. That’s the message for all of the haters out there ripping Arizona Cardinals quarterback Matt Leinart for pictures posted on a celebrity gossip website show Leinart in a hot tub with four hot girls, holding a beer bong as a fellow partygoer chugs down some liquid courage and a third one show him hugging on another young chica. Of course, the fact that the party took place at Leinart’s own house doesn’t seem to be dissuading any of these self-righteous idiots, either. Yes, dude had a kegger at his own house, invited a bunch of hot girls and he’s getting criticized for it. Personally, I’d be ripping him if he weren’t doing this kind of thing. It’s the offseason, it’s his own house and it’s just a party. He’s old enough to drink and he has every right to invite whomever he wants into his house and his hot tub. The people ripping him for this are taking themselves and football too seriously acting like he’s committed some grave sin against a hallowed institution by throwing a party and hot tubbing with hot girls. The hypocrites who have a problem with this would be right there in the hot tub, beer in hand if given the chance. Who knows, maybe they’re jealous of Leinart because they’re married with two kids, a mortgage and a minivan in the driveway. If an alleged crime or sexual assault had taken place at the party, then it’s a different story. But from everything I’ve heard, no one was hurt, a good time was had by one and all and because he was at his own home, Leinart didn’t run the risk of drunk driving, the problem that plagues too many athletes who like to have a good time. Maybe if guys like Adam “Pacman” Jones threw more parties at their homes and went to strip (or “scrip,” as Pacman said recently on Michael Irvin’s radio show), the world would be a much safer place. So party on, drink on and hot tub on, Matty. As long as you’re getting your work in at the gym during the day most of the time and are ready for the season when it begins this fall, no one has any right to criticize you for this.
- Your weekend box office winner, 21. The gambling-themed movie based on author Ben Mesrick’s award-winning book Breaking Vegas hit big with moviegoers, bringing in $23.7 million for the weekend at earning about $9,000 per theater, a very good opening weekend for a movie that wasn’t considered a blockbuster in the traditional sense despite a cast that includes Laurence Fishburne, Kevin Spacey and Kate Bosworth. Last week’s box office champ Horton Hears A Who dropped to second with $17.4 million, but the animated flick’s take of $117 million so far ranks it as a definite success. The unfunny “comedy” Superhero Movie came in third at $9.5 million, about a dozen spaces higher than it should have finished on the list, with Meet the Browns fourth and Owen Wilson’s new cookie-cutter, dialogue-by-numbers flick Drillbit Taylor coming in fifth. As always, even on a good weekend, there about a couple of good movies to see and then the quality level drops off precipitously.
- Buddhist monks are bad-ass. Not that it’s any surprise, but I always marvel when these men of the cloth show their toughness and testicular fortitude in forceful, outward displays of anger and aggression. Over the weekend, a group of 200 Tibetan exiles and monks stormed the Chinese Embassy visa office in Katmandu, the capital city of Nepal. The monk-led band of rebels bum-rushed the office and were met with stiff resistance from police, who used bamboo batons to beat and subdue the dissidents. Approximately 130 protestors were arrested in the incident and several of them were also injured in the melee, as were a few police officers. Storming an office at the Chinese Embassy and clashing with cops, well done, Buddhist monks, well done. It’s a tad simplistic and basic, not really the sophisticated type of riot I like to see, but for making a statement, few things do the trick like brawling directly with The Man and injuring a few law enforcement personnel along the way. As I said yesterday, the Chinese government is begging if they think this resistance is going to die down or that the world is going to forget about the situation in Tibet just because the country doing the merciless oppressing in Tibet is also hosting the Summer Olympics. A big thumbs up to those 200 protestors in Nepal, you guys rock.
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