Saturday, April 15, 2017

Strangers in the kitchen, lowering the standards for rock supergroups and rage on the MLS pitch


- That’s how you get people talking about your third-rate soccer league, Tim Howard. Howard, who has posted some memorable performances for the U.S. men’s national team and playing in top European leagues, is now slumming it in the twilight of his career as the keeper for the Colorado Rapids of Major League Soccer irrelevance. He won't be doing the whole goalkeeping part of his gig for the team’s next three games, as he’s been suspended for three games by the league and fined an undisclosed amount for separate incidents involving fans in Kansas City. His actions may cost him money and playing time, but as the NBA and NHL playoffs fire up, at least people are talking about soccer for a moment or two. The incidents took place during an after the Rapids' 3-1 loss at Sporting Kansas City, after which Howard showed up in a video posted to social media exchanging expletives with some in SKC's home crowd late in the match. His rage did not abate after the game, as he also grabbed an SKC supporter by the arm as players were leaving the field. The league announced that the veteran goalie disciplined "for foul language directed toward a fan during the Rapids' match against Sporting Kansas City and for an altercation with a fan following the game." Mix in a heated conversation with SKC forward Dom Dwyer after the final whistle and you have a big-name player who definitely didn’t abide by the league’s 'Don't Cross the Line' campaign, which is dedicated to supporting the communities where its teams play. Howard just stepped across that line and spit on the first person he saw on the other side of it……..


- Is there a country anywhere in the world that a) has held an election in the past few months and b) doesn’t have angry segment of its populace disputing its results and alleging fraud? The latest nation grappling with claims of rigged elections and electoral misconduct by the government is Ecuador, where election officials have agreed to recount 1.3 million votes as opposition leader Guillermo Lasso continues to allege fraud in the presidential election. That concession came from the National Electoral Council, which announced that it would review all the disputed voting acts in a recount to be held next week in capital city of Quito. The election took place April 2, with results showing former banker Lasso losing the election by less than 3 percentage points to Lenin Moreno, President Rafael Correa's handpicked successor. South American nations have had their share of handpicked successors who turn into horrendous leaders making their country markedly worse by the day - oh, hey there, Venezuelan despot Nicolas Maduro! - and whether Moreno would be that kin of leader or not, he should still be elected fairly. To that end, Lasso filed a complaint demanding a recount of all ballots cast in the election. He has little support from the Organization of American States, which claims its monitoring work at 480 voting centers nationwide found no discrepancies between the tallies and official results, but that isn't stopping him from pressing on……..


- No Doubt Without Gwen Stefani was already taken as a band name? It must be, because the remaining members of No Doubt and AFI frontman Davey Havok have formed what could be called a supergroup - as long as we’ve significantly lowered the standards for what it takes to qualify as a supergroup - named DREAMCAR, The group consist of Havok, Tom Dumont, Tony Kanal and Adrian Young and their merry band of misfits recently announced their self-titled debut album and have been sharing tracks from the LP ahead of its release. The most recent song to drop is “All of the Dead Girls,” with the whole album to be released next month. On one hand, this is sort of like reviving a truly terrible and forgettable quasi-rock band and replacing the lead singer, which is unfortunate because we’ve been rid of No Doubt since the band’s original line-up, including Stefani, reformed to play a series of live shows in 2015. It’s been even longer when it comes to being subjected to the horrors of new No Doubt music, as the group’s most recent album, “Push and Shove,” dropped in 2012. Since then, Stefani has done her own thing as a solo pop act and focused a lot on her fashion career, which is fine because the more she worries about clothing and accessories, the less time she has to make that terrible brand of music of which she’s already given so much to the world……..


- Normally, having someone else in your kitchen cooking up a delicious meal would be a welcome sight. That’s presuming, of course, that the person in the kitchen is someone you know and invited into your home, as opposed to a drunken stranger who broke in while you were gone and was getting their inner Mario Battali on when you happened upon them. Welcome to sunny central Florida, where Samantha O'Neal came home at the end of a long day with her sister and a friend in tow and met uninvited sous chef Ronald Wesly, standing over her stove. "I walked in to him standing here with this pot of oil, where he was frying chicken. The strainer right here, this chicken in freezer that got cut open, frying chicken," O'Neal said. According to O’Neal, Wesly took both chicken and sausage from her refrigerator and appeared to be drunk off of her sister's liquor and once she recovered her wits, she did whatever she could to drive the intruder from her home.  "I was scared. My sister was more scared," she added.  "I just wanted him off the property, so I picked him up and threw him out the gate." While the actual throwing part may be a bit of an exaggeration, the drunken Wesly was soon located wandering nearby and Alachua County Sheriff's deputies arrested him. Though O’Neal described Wesly as an acquaintance, she insisted that she did not allow him inside her home or at any point give him permission to be there. Maybe it’s time to replace that welcome mat at the front door with something a bit less hospitable and more in the spirit of telling people to stay the hell out……..

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