- If you’re not cheating, you’re not trying… and it’s only
cheating if a baseball defies gravity and sticks to a catcher’s chest protector
following a seemingly unimportant pitch in an early-season MLB game. It’s still
not clear what caused a ball to stick to St. Louis Cardinals catcher Yadier
Molina's chest protector during a 6-4 loss to the Chicago Cubs, but the guy who
threw the ball wants to make it clear he didn’t apply any foreign substance to
it. "I really don't have any
explanation for it. I don't use any foreign substance to put on there,"
Cardinals reliever Brett Cecil said. "You guys saw Yadi spinning around
and the ball didn't even come off. "I think if I was throwing with
something that sticky, I'd be throwing 45-foot dirtballs the whole game and
that's not the case. I have no idea. I talked to Yadi. He has no idea. I can't
explain it." Ironically, the incident allowed the Cubs' leadoff hitter to
reach base and set up a game-winning rally, so if the Cardinals were cheating,
it backfired on them. The Cubs didn’t ask umpires to examine the ball and
afterward, Cecil and Cardinals manager Mike Matheny said they had not heard
from MLB, which later said it had reviewed the play and there wasn't any rules
violation. "I've seen a lot of guys put stuff other places. I don't have
anything showing," Cecil said. "You guys can look at games from the
past and there's no certain area that I touch more frequently than others. It's
not difficult for me, because I know I don't put anything on the ball. He
invited the examination of his glove for any evidence of foreign substances and
said people were “not going to find anything if they do.” It’s hard to tell if
this will stick to Cecil and Molina or not……..
- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! While much of the world rightfully
focuses its eyes on the ongoing crisis in Syria, South America continues to be
an extremely angry place where one nation in particular is threatening to come
apart at the seams. Venezuela continues to be a country in chaos as opposition
groups work to dislodge dictator Nicolas Maduro from power. Those opponents are
calling on demonstrators to flood the streets of Caracas as part of a weeklong
protest movement that’s growing stronger and more defiant by the day,
continuing months of efforts to affect change at the top. These efforts have
been met with strong-armed tactics by Maduro's government and those only serve
to embolden those who want to see a new leader put in place. Many past
demonstrations have been planned weeks head to guarantee high turnout, but this
past week has seen more spontaneous gatherings, including this weekend’s events
after authorities barred former presidential candidate Henrique Capriles from
seeking office for 15 years. That decision spurred Capriles’ supporters to rise
up and denounce the move as another piece of evidence that their country is
indeed a dictatorship. When such a move comes one week after a Supreme Court
decision to gut the opposition-controlled legislature of its last remnants of
power, it’s awfully difficult to argue that the country is anything but…….
- Stand down, Clown Nation. You may think you have cause to stomp
your massive, floppy red shoes and squirt water angrily from those plastic
flowers on your lapels, but you don’t. Stop acting all indignant because you
believe the first trailer for the remake of Stephen King’s “It” unfairly
portrays your community of freaks and weirdos in white pancake makeup. The
trailer drew a vivid response when it was shown at the SXSW festival last month
and when it was posted online, it racked up a record number of views in its
first 24 hours. The R-rated film adaptation of King’s 1986 novel is set to drop
Sept. 8 and stars Bill Skarsgård as Pennywise, taking up the wacky red wig of Tim
Curry, who famously portrayed the creepy clown in a popular 1990 TV miniseries.
In the wake of the trailer, clowns around the world are dropping their zany
hijinks and expressing honest outrage on the grounds that such a movie can
shape and alter people’s perceptions of clowns. Some longtime clowns believe
the movie will affect their business, i.e. going to children’s birthday parties
as every adult in attendance quietly hopes that the mother of the birthday boy
or girl did a background check to make sure that Chuckles the Clown isn't a
pedophile. In truth, clowns are one small step below mimes on the ladder of
creepy, unsavory groups of performers/entertainers and arguing that a movie is
going to do serious damage to a reputation that wasn’t great to begin with just
seems like a cry for help…….
- Rarely has a person sported a more ironic last name while
committing such a moronic action. Meet the inaptly named Tabbatha Kay Mature of
Baltimore, Michigan, who turned the Magic Kingdom into a WWE ring this week,
focusing her lack of self-control and intelligence on a teenage girl who had
the audacity to stand in a place that blocked the view Mature and her family
had selected for a fireworks display at Disney's Magic Kingdom. According to an
Orange County Sheriff's arrest report, Mature is accused of child abuse after
choking a teenager who refused to sit down during the show. The teenager was
visiting the park with friends and made what wasn’t the most considerate choice
by standing up when the show started, blocking the Mature family's view. She
and her friends continued to stand, at which point Mature "became
aggravated" that they wouldn't sit down. Teenage girls aren't the most
likely group to start an all-out brawl and eventually, the girl and her friends
decided to leave. Sheriff’s deputies claim the girl told Mature on her way away
from the scene, "You can take our spot." Maybe it was said with a
little too much teenage sass or perhaps Mature hasn’t built up an ounce of
actual maturity in her four-plus years on this Earth, because she allegedly
responded by wrapping her hands around the girl's neck and squeezing. While the
girl wasn't injured and Mature was released from jail on a $2,000 bond, it’s
fair to say that no one in this showdown acted like an actual adult or even a
decent human being……..
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