- This week’s “Height of Hypocrisy Award” goes to all those football commentators who are now saying, “They say Peyton Manning can’t win the big one, and now he’s won it and shut them up.” Excuse me, know-it-all commentators, but you were the ones saying that, so why don’t you stop trying to pawn it off like everyone else was doubting him but you never did. You were one of those voices flogging him for his repeated failures in the playoffs. Someone had to be the ones nay saying against him, yet all of your are pretending that it was someone else and that you were on board with him the whole time. Sure you were, just like you all didn’t rip Rex Grossman and say the Bears can't make a Super Bowl with him at quarterback, except wait, there they are, set to play the Colts in the Super Bowl. I’m waiting to hear one, just one, commentator say, “You know what, I doubted Peyton Manning, I said he couldn’t win the big one, and I was flat out wrong.” Still waiting…….
- Our national nightmare is over, football fans! The Patriots have lost, and in the ultimate ironic twist, Mr. Clutch, Tom Brady, choked in the clutch, throwing the death-blow interception with 19 seconds left as he was attempting to drive his team to the winning score. The hoodie, Bill Belichick, didn’t look so smart in the post game interview as he mumbled barely-audible, monosyllabic responses to questions. How enjoyable was it to see the bitterness and disappointment on his usually smug, arrogant face? He who usually has all the answers suddenly has none. Now, we can enjoy the two weeks leading up to the Super Bowl without having to hear everyone wax poetic about how the Patriots just keep getting it done, winning the “right way” and overcoming all the odds and all of the disrespect…..zip it. Moments of joy as a sports fan aren't quite on the level with other great life moments that you actually participate in personally, but seeing the Pats lose was right at the top of my list as far as most joyful sports moments ever, period. In the immortal words of pro wrestling superstars Degeneration-X, Patriots, I’ve got two words for you…..SUCK IT!
- Time for a “Trump”-date on the Donald’s current skirmishes: the town of Palm Beach, Fla. has decided to fine Trump $1,250 a day for flying a gigantic American flag at his Mar-A-Lago property in the city. This has been going on for month, one rich dude fighting with a bunch of other rich people about the size of flag that one is allowed to fly. Based on the verbal beatdown Trump laid on Rosie and Babs Walters in their recent battle (by the way, Donald continues to hammer Rosie, he won't give up), I’m going to advise the officials in Palm Beach to reconsider their stance on this. The Donald will attack your appearance, your career, your manners, your friends, pretty much anything he can take a shot at, he will. I look forward to some smack about rich white guys who are ugly, stupid and unsuccessful coming from Trump’s pie hole very soon.
- Guatemala isn't just good for coffee and guerrilla warfare anymore. The country’s former top drug investigator and his former deputy were sentenced to ten years in a U.S. prison for conspiring to distribute cocaine in America. They were lured here under the pretense of training on fighting drug traffickers, but in reality, the plan was to catch drug traffickers - them. Weird, isn't it, our government lying to someone to achieve an objective. Where have I heard that before, like an administration lying to the country about WMDs in a certain Middle East country to justify a wrongful invasion…..but back to the matter at hand. Nice that your country’s top drug enforcers are on the wrong side of the law, I’m sure that makes Guatemalans feel great. But it’s nice to know that we share the common bond of having lying, deceiving, underhanded government officials who aren’t working for our best interests, but rather against them.
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