Friday, November 08, 2013

Seattle's baseball rage, war on trans fats and Courtney love is full of sh*t


- If anyone knows the powers and problems of illegal narcotics on a rock star, it’s The Strokes guitarist Albert Hammond Jr. Hammond is a noted – and currently sober – drug addict who recently revealed that he took his first trip to rehab in 2009 and was in a "dark place" when The Strokes released their second album, “Room On Fire,” in 2003. "It was, like, oxycontin and cocaine at 24, 25, 26. and then I became [addicted to] heroin around then. So from 26, 27 'til 29,” Hammond said. “It's not so much that I wasn't in a happy place. I was just... God knows where I was. I was just very high. That's where I was.” With those qualifications to his credit, Hammond clearly feels qualified to weigh in on professional attention whore and amateur rock star Courtney Love’s recent claim that using crack makes her a higher-functioning person and a "whiz at calculus.” She is certainly not the first drug user to claim that she’s smarter, better and more productive while high/stoned/peaking/tweaking, but a stoner claiming he does better on his algebra test or that he totally works better every day when he’s higher than someone standing in the middle of the crowd at Phish concert is a bit different than a subpar front singer of a mediocre band like Hole saying she becomes a freaking genius when she smokes crack. "She's full of sh*t," Hammond said. "People make statements like that. They're trying to express in words. I think it needs to sound more extreme just to have that effect. She's describing that she had extreme focus on one thing, whereas most of the time, she was just more all over the place. She's definitely full of sh*t." Hammond went on to say that he used to shoot cocaine, heroin and ketamine in one giant dose, “20 times a day.” He also just happened to release a new solo album, “AHJ,” last month and may or may not be saying dramatic sh*t to drum up attention for it………


- City workers are not known for their attention to detail or tireless work ethic. Taking 15 coffee breaks a day and having your buddy clock you out two hours after you left work so you can make it to the baseball game on time will have that effect, but a team of road workers in Memphis appear to be plumbing new depths for laziness and judging by their most recent efforts, they don’t have far to go to reach the bottom of the sloth barrel. Last week, these blue-collar bozos were assigned to paint new lines on Crumpler Road near Valley Oak Drive. It was a simple assignment, the type even the most low-level, high school dropout of a city worker should be able to handle with ease. Just block off the road, clear of all of the debris and allow your cool truck with its mechanical arm and sprayer to do the work as you drive along at 3 mph. That was clearly too much to ask of this work crew, as they missed a key entry on that checklist: Clear of ALL DEBRIS FROM THE ROAD BEFORE PAINTING. Given that it is fall and trees are shedding their leaves at a high rate, one might assume there would be fallen leaves galore to clear from a street before painting over it. The members of this crew were either too dumb to realize this or too lazy to care because they rumbled down the street a-paintin’ away and in the process, they painted right over a large pile of leaves. They also painted over some debris from a yard and given that none of those items are likely to stay put for long, one might call this sloppy work a total waste of tax dollars. Angry residents snapped photos of the scene and sent them to city officials, as well as to a local television station, accompanied by demands that the job be redone immediately. City officials say the engineering division is “looking into the problem” and a solution. A mere 6-8 feet of street are all that needs repainted, but then again, painting that section of road was a pretty damn big challenge the last time someone tried it…….


- The Man’s war on trans fats is heating up. The Food and Drug Administration kicked things up a notch in the battle to help America drop a few notches from its collective belt on Thursday, taking the first step toward banning trans fat, the artery-clogging ingredient long used to make french fries crispy and pastries flaky. The agency ruled for the first time that trans fat isn't generally considered safe, a move quickly applauded by doctors and nutritionists around the country. Predictably, food companies and restaurant chains were not as fired up,  although many have claimed for some time now that they have either stopped using trans fats or would be doing so soon. Others say that it would be very difficult for them to stop using trans fats all together, especially in desserts. Trans far is created by adding hydrogen to vegetable oil in a century-old process and the truly disgusting, nasty resulting solid fat is known by the appealing name of partially hydrogenated oil. It can extend the shelf life of products and improve their taste, thereby increasing profit margins for food makers and eateries who can keep food around longer. Trans fat was also a key ingredient in margarine for many years and oddly enough, it was thought at that time to be healthier than the lard, butter and other animal fats it replaced. Health concerns mounted over the years after studies linked trans fat to higher LDL, or bad cholesterol, and the ever-fun duo of heart attacks and strokes. Scientists now generally agree that there is no safe level of trans fats and the tipping point seemed to be the middle of the last decade, when the FDA instituted a requirement that processed food makers disclose the presence of trans fat. In turn, food makers started switching oils rather than have the ingredient show up on the nutrition facts label on their packaging. Then the epicenter of nanny state governing, New York City, banned restaurants from using trans fat starting in 2007. FDA Commissioner Margaret Hamburg announced the agency’s plans to totally vanquish trans fats, saying "current intake remains a significant public-health concern." According to FDA estimates, further reductions in trans fat could prevent an additional 20,000 heart attacks and 7,000 deaths a year in the United States…….


- It’s amazing what a rebel group will agree to when they’re royally screwed and have no strongholds left to rely upon. The Democratic Republic of Congo's M23 rebel group found itself in just such a position this week after the army captured its last two hilltop strongholds. That inspired to M23 to end to its 20-month insurgency and announce that it was ready to pursue a political solution to the conflict. Those words came after government forces drove the rebels out of Tshanzu and Runyoni before dawn, following a two-week offensive that cornered the insurgents in heavily wooded hills along the border with Uganda and Rwanda. "The chief of staff and the commanders of all major units are requested to prepare troops for disarmament, demobilization and reintegration on terms to be agreed with the government of Congo," M23 leader Bertrand Bisimwa said in a statement. Foreign governments hailed the declaration as a positive step for eastern Congo, a region plagued for more than 15 years by conflict fueled by competition for gold, copper and cobalt as well as cross-border ethnic tensions. At a meeting of regional leaders in South Africa later in the week, several attendees said that President Joseph Kabila's government would sign a peace deal within days if rebels laid down their arms. After the surrender, thousands of women in the distant capital, Kinshasa, dressed in white and marched down the central boulevard to parliament chanting songs praising Kabila and the army. The scene was all the more remarkable given that one month ago, M23 overran U.N. peacekeepers and the army to capture Goma, the largest town in eastern Congo. That prompted the U.N. to deploy its shiny new Intervention Brigade, which was able to help the army overrun the conflict-plagued M23. One ragtag band of African militants down, a few thousands more to go…….. 


- Bolt down the bases and prepare for a storm of rage, Seattle Mariners fans, because your team has just hired a man who needs no introduction….and yet received one anyhow when the team announced his hiring as its new manager. Yes, Lloyd McClendon is the new manager of the Seattle Mariners, replacing Eric Wedge, who walked away from the team due to a difference of opinion with the Mariners front office. Wedge didn’t believe the team was committed to him in the long term, so he walked. McLendon is happy to step in after serving as the Detroit Tigers’ hitting coach since 2007. But of course, McClendon is famous not for his work with hitters such as Miguel Cabrera and Prince Fielder, but for something that happened when he managed the Pittsburgh Pirates from 2001-05. In a 2001 game against Milwaukee, McClendon famously tore first base out of the ground after what he felt was a blown call by the umpires and informed them that if they weren't going to use the base correctly, he would take it. He stormed off the field and kept the base with him, going instant legend in the process. If that isn't a man who deserves another chance to manage a team, then no one is. After interviewing for the Mariners job in 2010 and not getting it, life has come full circle for McClendon and he is geeked for the chance. "I am extremely excited about the opportunity to manage the Seattle Mariners," he said in a statement. "Seattle has a tremendous group of talented players and the fans and city should be excited about the club's future. I'm looking for this group to take a big step forward." Upping the level of performance in Seattle won't be tough, as Wedge had a 212-272 record as Mariners manager. The team hasn’t had a winning season since 2009 and went 71-91 last season, so maybe it’s time to start ripping some bases out of the ground……..

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