- Great news America. You can ignore those images of chaos and anarchy in Iraq. Forget about the video footage of bombings, explosions and mortar rounds going off non-stop. Overlook those IEDs (improvised explosive devices) going off on roads across the country on a daily basis. Why? Because according to our fearless and intellectually stunted leader, victory can still be ours. Saying difficult choices and additional sacrifices are ahead, W assured Americans that we can still “win”. How the hell we win, I don’t know. Is there a way to reverse the needless deaths of every American solider who has been killed in Iraq? And what difficult decisions? You mean like sending more people who aren't you and aren't your own family members over there? How’s about an easy decision, Georgie? Look right into the cameras and repeat the following: “We are withdrawing all American troops from Iraq immediately and permanently.” Now that’s an easy choice. Let the Iraqis figure this mess out on their own. The only “victory” here would be if you had the goal of creating your very own Vietnam, because you’ve succeeded in doing that.
- Yet another reason to salute Donald Trump. The Donald decided to verbally blow up Rosie O’Fat, one of the least funny, most abrasive personalities on TV today, or ever for that matter. First off, let me admit that I would be on board with the Donald, or anyone else for that matter, taking a run at Rosie whether they had a good reason or not. I don’t need to know the particulars or whether the jabs were justified, but I’ll go ahead and spell them out anyhow. Rosie cracked Trump during an episode of The View, calling him a “snake oil salesman” and ripping him for being a moral arbiter in the Miss America controversy. Gosh, fat, ugly Rosie being bitter about a situation involving a hot, blonde model, who could have guessed……but anyhow, back to Trump’s reply. And here I feel motivated to declare today “Donald Trump Day”, except that I have no power to do so and the man could probably afford to buy a day of the week and name it after himself….but Trump fired back with the big guns. He called Rosie (accurately) fat, stupid, a loser and a plethora of other things. He said he would sue her, he said that he can't believe he’s a billionaire and yet he has to listen to this crap and he generally looked down on plump, bitter, bad-mane sporting O’Fat. Amen, Donald, amen. All true statements about Rosie and it’s about time someone fired back at her the way she goes after others. Rosie needs to realize that she’s a co-host on a subpar daytime talk show and she can't even do that well. She’s not funny, smart, insightful, pleasant to look at or to listen to. So Rosie, keep your head down, your mouth closed and be thankful that you still manage to be on TV daily, because that in and of itself is a major miracle.
- Maybe the Donald was so venomous in his annihilation of Rosie not just because she’s a fat, ignorant, abrasive, militant lesbian, but also because he was pissed because that the state of Pennsylvania rejected his proposal to build a casino in northwest Philadelphia while approving bids for five stand-alone slot parlors in the state submitted by competing groups. The Donald doesn’t like to lose or lose out on chances to make more money, so this decision can't sit too well with him. Philly will now be the nation’s largest city with a casino, but it won't be thanks to D. Trump. Apparently state gambling regulators failed to take into account Trump’s magnanimous decision not to strip Miss America, Tara Conner, of her title following allegations of underage drinking, drug use (cocaine) and sexual misconduct including getting with other chicks, namely Miss Teen USA. This decision alone should entitle Trump to build a casino in every state in the union if he wants and to tax exempt status for the first ten years of operation at each casino. But based on the Donald’s reputation, you can be sure he’ll find a way to stick a new casino somewhere else sooner rather than later.
- College football season is long. Good, but long. It starts in late August and there are games every week and weekend until early December, so it can seem to drag on at times. But there’s always plenty of action, upsets, rivalries, hot cheerleaders, crazy mascots and bands and hundreds of great moments on the field. But now is one of the absolute best times of the whole season, because it’s time for bowl season. The Poinsettia Bowl in San Diego kicked things off, with TCU thumping Northern Illinois 37-7 on Tuesday. But today is when the bowl action kicks into high gear, with bowls pretty much every day for the two weeks, with the exception of no games on Christmas. If you just tune in for the “major” games (Rose, Sugar, Fiesta, Orange, the national title game) you’ll miss some magical moments. Keep your tired holiday traditions like caroling, egg nog, gaudy lawn decorations, last-minute Christmas shopping, etc., and give me a full slate of bowl games any time. My sleeper pick for a great game this year? The Holiday Bowl in San Diego, which is almost always an offensive fireworks display and this year, the game will feature the Cal Bears and the Texas A&M Aggies.
- Winter weather blows. I don’t even live near Denver, but the blizzard there that is expected to dump about 20 inches of snow by the time it ends sends chills down my spine, thousands of miles away. How heinous is that, two feet of frakkin’ snow to deal with? Yeah, you get to stay home from work, school, etc., but it’s not like you can do much else. Roads are closed, so you can't drive over to the mall, and it’s probably closed anyhow. Sledding and ice skating are only fun for so long, and having to cross-country ski just to get into town every day for two weeks would get old really fast. So go ahead and cross Denver off of my list of places I would ever consider living. A good rule of thumb would be that if you regularly have winter storms that drop more than a foot of snow, I don’t want to ever reside anywhere near your city or town.
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