- This is a rarity. Not only is there a great player who
isn't running at Usain Bolt-like speeds in the opposite direction from the
Major League Baseball Home Run Derby, but this weirdo is eager to participate
in the event. Normally, sluggers duck the derby as if it were a radioactive can
of lead paint guarded by a hungry grizzly bear, but Miami Marlins ball
obliterator Giancarlo Stanton wants
to make his Derby debut this year. The urban legend is that swinging for the
fences in the derby wrecks swings and leads to poor second-half-of-the-season
performances, so many top hitters just say no when the invitation comes their
way. Stanton has no intention of doing so if National League Derby captain Troy
Tulowitzki calls on him. Stanton missed the 2012 Derby because of last-minute
arthroscopic knee surgery and was inexplicably overlooked by last year's NL
Derby captain, David Wright. He is currently just outside the top three
for a starting spot in next month’s All-Star Game, but should he get in as a
starter or a reserve, Stanton is ready to stand in and take his hacks. . "It would be fun," Stanton
said. "I was unfortunate in 2012. I was, what, half a day from being in
one? So it would be fun to get my second chance at it." With 137 career
homers in his first 565 games in the big leagues and a penchant for hitting the
ball so far it feels like it will never land, Stanton is the sort of player who
could add some much-needed juice to the tired, played Derby. "Well, I've
always watched it growing up. And I obviously know what I can do in batting
practice. It would be so much fun to see how it would all pan out, to
participate in it,” Stanton added. Well said, G., and here’s hoping you get the
chance you’re seeking……….
- Bad news, ISIS and other extremist groups in Iraq and
Syria. Those recruits you were counting on to pour in from northern
Africa….yeah, they probably aren’t coming to join the fight. According
to the uptight squares with Morocco's Interior Ministry, their forces have dismantled a
cell recruiting Moroccans to fight for those extremist groups waging war
against the governments of Iraq and Syria, attempting to establish an Islamic
state ruled by sharia law. According to a statement released Wednesday by the
ministry, six men were arrested in the central city of Fez, including one who
had previously been detained under the terrorism law. Morocco hasn’t really
jumped into the fray with the rest of the nations in upheaval across the Middle
East and Africa and thus far, the nation that served as the setting for the
classic film “Casablanca” has mostly avoided the terrorist attacks striking
elsewhere in northern Africa. Still, police there have frequently reported dismantling
cells sending fighters to hotspots like Mali and Syria. These efforts are
vital, the ministry said in its statement, because many of the fighters hope to
return after being trained and to carry out attacks in Morocco. Moroccan police
estimate that 900 Moroccans are
fighting in Syria and 100 have been arrested upon their return. Busting up their
training camps before they can finish their training could help prevent those
future arrests, but the next wave of extremist whack jobs will likely learn
from this and find an even more remote, sand-infested training ground upon
which to prepare for their holy war…….
- G*d-f**king da**it, Gordon Ramsay. Ramsay has entertained
the masses for nearly a decade with his food-centric reality show “Kitchen
Nightmares,” but the celebrity chef has decided to deposit the successful show
in the same place where he’s dumped so many of the underwhelming dishes cooked
by the chefs whose lives and psyches he has wrecked over the years: the trash. Ramsay
announced Monday that he's closing up shop on “Nightmares,” ending the show
that played a massive role in building his celebrity chef empire. He made the
announcement in a statement posted on his website. "It's been a blast but
it's time to call it a day,” Ramsay wrote of the decision. "I'd like to
thank you all for being so supportive. I'm glad I've been able to entertain and
hopefully help a few people along the way. It's sad to say goodbye to Kitchen
Nightmares but I'll be continuing with my other shows. It's been memorable!
Thank you for watching." While Ramsay has clearly given serious thought to
the issue, his decision is one that seemed to catch Fox off guard. The network
has aired the show in the United States since it came to America in 2007, three
years after debuting in the United Kingdom. In his statement, Ramsay said he
has filmed 123 episodes of the series and with four other shows on Fox,
suggested that he has plenty on his plate despite shuttering his flagship show.
With “Hell’s Kitchen,” MasterChef” and “MasterChef Junior” still on the air,
it’s not as if American viewers with a taste for acerbic, hostile British chefs
will have much of a chance to miss him. “Kitchen Nightmares” wrapped up its
seventh – and final - season on Fox in May. He and Fox still have a strong
bond, but if the decision to end “Nightmares” truly was an unwelcome surprise,
then it will be interesting to see if that relationship is strained going
forward……..
- Ohio is nuts for buckeyes. Typically, those Buckeyes wear
scarlet and gray and beat up on overmatched Big Ten cellar dwellers on Saturday
afternoons in the fall before being embarrassed by an ACC or SEC in a New
Year’s Day bowl game, but Ohioans also enjoy the small nut from which their
state derives its nickname. Miami
Valley Gaming decided to cash in on that buckeye love with a commercial
featuring a unique offer to draw in business. The establishment decided that a
gaming business should offer people a good-luck charm and so it was that the
casino dangled the offer of a free buckeye for all gamblers coming through its doors
to throw away their disposable income on the slots, at the roulette wheel or at
the craps table. "So we said come
in and get your buckeye. They came in and started wanting their lucky buckeye
to put in their pocket," said Jeff Nelson, senior marketing director for Miami
Valley Gaming. The racino originally ordered 5,000 nuts to meet the demand
created by its commercial, never expecting that there would be such a stampede
of losers demanding a buckeye that it would run out and need to buy more. "They
didn't last us a week so we started buying more and more," Nelson added. The
restocking of the nut shelves continued for days on end and now, the promotion
has led more than 40,000 poor saps looking for any possible good luck charm
they can find to change their luck and win back the thousands of dollars they’ve
pissed away at the racino. Nelson admitted the racino is having a difficult
time keeping up with demand and that could lead to a buckeye shortage in
O-H-I-O………
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