Saturday, January 19, 2008

The WGA does some studying, the Pussycat Skanks return to TV and it's Feds 2, Athletes 0

- I see your ongoing riots, protest marches, signs, banners and burning cars and I love it, Kenya. Kenyan opposition groups continue to insist that the country's recent presidential election was rigged and they are not sitting idly by. No, they are taking to the streets with bad intentions, burning, rioting, looting and clashing with police in spectacular fashion. The riots continued throughout the week, especially in Nairobi, where police fired tear gas and rubber bullets at protesters, killing two of them on Wednesday as they continued to demand the resignation of the country's president. Opposition leader Raila Odinga had called for three days of violence after violence that killed more than 600 opposition members last week. Police declared protests illegal on Wednesday, but that's the beauty of protests; they fly in the face of authority, so declaring them illegal doesn't shut them down, it just fuels the fire of the protesters. Some of the images show burning cars and protesters with massive signs and banners, marching in defiance of the police. "We will go the extra mile for democracy," said Philomen Bett, a rioting teacher in the western city of Eldoret. Well said, P., well said. Go that extra mile and go that mile waving a banner, chanting anti-government slogans and burning and overturning cars along the way. - Conservationists aren't happy with W., but how surprised can you really be by that? The latest spat between environmental activists and the president who has done more to destroy our environment than any president before him revolves around W.'s decision to exempt the Navy from an environmental law so it can continue to use high-power sonar in its training exercises off the coast of Southern California. The activists say the practice harms whales and other marine creatures, but does anyone really expect that ass hat W. to worry about that? He refuses to admit that global warming exists, he does everything possible to put the interests of industry ahead of the environment and he does it with a disdainful disregard for the environment not seen much this side of the Exxon Valdez. The 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco is set to make a decision soon on the overall fate of these Navy training exercises, but whatever they decide, you can count on W. to ignore it and do what he wants, to toe continued detriment of the environment. - Let this be a lesson to all you athletes out there: you can’t outsmart the feds. You’ve tried and it isn’t working. A few weeks ago, Marion Jones ended up getting sentenced to six months in jail for lying to federal agents investigating the Bay-Area Lab Co-Operative, a lab that supplied and engineered steroids for elite athletes looking to beat the system and get over by cheating. Jones lied and lied, but in the end she ended up pleading for mercy before a federal judge, who showed no compassion in hitting her with the maximum sentence allowable for her crime. Now comes news that former NFL-er Dana Stubblefield has admitted to lying to the feds about his own drug and steroid usage and will be sentenced next week. Stubblefield, 37, is now retired from football, but back in 2004 he spoke to federal agents in the BALCO probe and was less than truthful. Actually, he got an early jump on his lying by fibbing to investigators before meeting with the feds, so he really covered his bases. According to the charges against him, Stubblefield told agents that he had never seen or ingested the drug THG, a designer steroid known as “the clear,” even though it turns out he was suspended from the NFL in 2003 while playing for the Oakland Raiders because he used…..the clear. Damn, that’s unfortunate. He also lied when he told the feds he had never used the blood-booster EPO, designed to help blood increase its oxygen-carrying capacity, even though he has also tested positive in the past for….you guessed it, EPO. The NFL didn’t pop him for the EPO because that wasn’t part of NFL policy back then, but the feds asked him about it and my man D. Stubblefield should have told them the truth. Now, he faces up to five years in prison, although under the sentencing guidelines for his case, he is likely to receive six months or less of jail time. Memo to all you athletes out there whom the feds have questioned or will question about ‘roids: tell the truth. Fess up, come clean because if you don’t, you’re going down. The scoreboard currently reads Feds 2, Athletes 0. You may think you’re different, but you’re not. You may think you’re the one clever cat who can get over on the feds, but you’re wrong. Just be honest with them and they might show you a little mercy. Lie to them and you too could be headed to the pokey. - Thanks for nothing, Writers Guild of America. Now comes word that the WGA plans to begin informal talks with studio execs, possibly even by Monday, as part of their work to restart negotiations with the American Motion Picture and Television Producers. Of course, this news does little good for this current season, which the WGA and AMPTP, two acronyms I’ve come to despise, have trashed any chances that all our favorite shows will have a full season or even finish what they’ve started. An anonymous guild source has revealed that the widespread discontent that's developed since talks broke off Dec. 7 may be seeing a bit of reason for optimism. The news of the talks follows a deal made yesterday between the Directors Guild of America and the AMPTP, which, the source said, the WGA plans to "study. We're going to follow the same pattern as the DGA," the source was quoted as saying, "first meeting with the studio executives informally and then maybe following that up with actual negotiations." Actual negotiations? Ya think? Maybe that would work? Wow, you guys sure are smart. Wish you’d been smart enough to think of this a couple of months ago, but hey, maybe that’s just me being greedy. If you’re looking for a silver lining here, you could find it in the fact that if this strike ends soon, perhaps next season won’t be decimated in the same fashion as the current one has been. Then again, with ass hats like the WGA and AMPTP, there are no sure things….

- One more TV note….why is it that the Pussycat Skanks can’t just find a group full of wannabe strippers with marginal singing ability and the willingness to dress like whores and stick with it? Why does the group have to come back every single TV season with a new show on the CW to select a new skank to add to their group? The PCS will return to the CW February 18 with Skanka-licious, er, Girlicious, the latest version of their reality slut auditions, to give 15 girls a shot at what the show’s promos call fame but I’ll call what it really is – the chance to make the most abominable music this side of Britney Spears, the Black Eyed Peas and American Karaoke, which is really saying something. I know the networks are desperate for programming because of the aforementioned strike, but that’s no excuse for the CW. Clearly they’ve put this crappy excuse for a show on the air when they still had working writers. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again – if your musical group has ever, EVER selected a member or launched a career via a reality TV show, you suck. No questions ask, you just suck. Go away, Pussycat Skanks, you’ve brought nothing of value to the musical or television mediums, so just get lost.

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