Sunday, January 20, 2008

Golfweek's gamble backfires, college basketball thoughts and morons in Green Bay

- Now we know why University of Florida student Andrew Meyer was so adamant about not Tasing him, bro, at a John Kerry speech on the UF campus last year. Taser blasts can result in death, it seems. An unidentified New Brighton, Minn. Man is dead after police hit him with a Taser when he was “uncooperative” following a traffic accident early last week. A patrol spokesman declined to say what sort of behavior was involved in the incident that led to the Taser shot, but five Minnesota state troopers were placed on leave immediately following the man’s death. Also, the State Bureau of Criminal Apprehension is leading an investigation into the incident, which is probably common procedure when a person dies at the hands of the police, but even so, I really will be interested to hear what this guy did that was so over the line as to warrant a Taser blast. Even if he was drunk and disorderly, if there were five state troopers at the scene and he wasn’t armed, you’re telling me that a Taser isn’t excessive force? Was this guy going Incredible Hulk or something, that you needed a Taser tuned for that high a jolt to get him under control? Something tells me we haven’t heard the end of this one….

- You knew it was inevitable, what with the divorce rate for superheroes in this country skyrocketing in recent years, but still, news that Spiderman is single hits hard. After more than 20 years of marriage, albeit fictional, comic-book marriage, Peter Parker, a.k.a. Spiderman, has split with wife Mary Jane, as revealed by Spider-Man comic book No. 545, the comic’s most recent issue. It was just time for a change, says Joe Quesada, editor-in-chief at Marvel Comics. He reasons that the split will allow Spidey to shake things up, to experience new adventures and dilemmas. “When we first did it, the reaction was, ‘How could you do that? This is a terrible thing to do,’” Quesada said of the reaction from fans. “But when the first issue of Brand New Day (this week’s comic in which the divorce happens) our letters very quickly changed to people saying, ‘This is fantastic.’” He also didn’t rule out the possibility of Parker wooing back Mary Jane, but I’m sure many of you comic book dorks out there must be heartbroken right now, so I’ll leave you to your weeping and pondering.

- Great job, WLUK-TV in Green Bay. Really, you’re sooooo clever, deciding not to air your daily Seinfeld rerun in its usual time slot on Friday because it’s New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning’s favorite show. Ahhhhhhh…..hilarious. You’re really funny and I’m sure you’ll really rattle Eli by not showing Seinfeld in your town on that night. Great job, losers. Because I’m sure the first thing he does on evenings leading up to the biggest game in his life is to scan the local TV listings and find out what time that hsow is on. It’s not like dude could possibly have every episode of the show on DVD and have a portable DVD player or laptop to watch an episode on, either. This is just another example of what radio and TV stations end up with when they try to be clever or do creative, cutesy promotions. They end up looking like asses and doing the stupidest stuff you could possibly imagine times ten. I sincerely hope your team loses just for that, WLUK-TV. You’re idiots for doing this and the bad karma ought to be enough to hang a loss on your beloved Green Bay Packers.

- college basketball season is kicking it into gear, which means insomnia for me. I don’t write as much about college basketball as I do college football even though I enjoy hoops more, mostly because college football tends to be concentrated in one day per week during the regular season (mostly on Saturday), while college basketball spans nearly every night of the week. Still, Big Mondays are a blast, mostly because college hoops junkies like myself who lives on the East Coast can stay up for the West Coast Conference or Mountain West Conference game that always ends Big Monday with a midnight EST tip and a conclusion some time around 2 a.m. This week’s Big Monday game features the University of San Francisco at Gonzaga, with Gonzaga being a perennial favorite team for ESPN on Big Mondays. There are definitely a few teams starting to establish themselves as dominant even this early in the season. Kansas and Memphis are still unbeaten, although in my mind, Memphis still not a top team until it proves otherwise in March. They play in Conference USA, which remains a step below the ACC, SEC, Big Ten and Pac 10 in the college basketball world. North Carolina is also one of the best despite suffering their first loss of the season, 82-80 at home to Maryland on Saturday, and UNC will be well-refined by their tough ACC schedule. The Pac 10 has two of the best in Washington State and UCLA, even though UCLA lost a stunning 72-63 decision to intra-city rival USC Saturday in a match-up of super-frosh sensations Kevin Love of UCLA and O.J. Mayo of USC. Speaking of Mayo, I’m already tired of this guy’s act. He’s a gunner who bounced from school to school in high school with some shady characters guiding his career and looking to gravy train off his rising star. He’s a guy who is overrated as a player until he improves his shooting and learns how to make his team better, because right now he’s the proverbial star who’s out to get his first and foremost. All in all, it’s hard to make too much sense of the season at this point, although Kansas State, Indiana and Clemson seem to be shaping up as legit darkhorse teams that could push the previously mentioned top squads. Now is when the season really gets interesting, with conference play just underway, so lock in for a great ride.

- Well, you did what you set out to do, Dave Seanor, people are really talking about Golfweek magazine now. Of course, the reason they’re talking is because you, a complete idiot and moron, have been fired as vice president and editor of the publication after inexplicably choosing to put a picture of a noose on the cover of your most recent issue as part of your coverage of Golf Channel analyst Kelly Tilghman’s comments about other PGA golfers ganging up to “lynch” Tiger Woods as a means of slowing down his dominant run. Seanor has been replaced by Jeff Babineau after the Jan. 19 issue, with a picture of a noose on the cover, drew widespread outrage from readers and activists. Good idea, loser. Yes, it’s an issue that a golf magazine should address, but choosing a noose was just a bad idea. You were trying to be controversial and generate interest so you could sell magazines, but it backfired. What exactly did you accomplish with a noose that you couldn’t have accomplished with something a lot less lowlife? Oh, that’s right. What you accomplished was getting yourself fired, although I doubt that was your goal….

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