- Are you more excited about boxing now? Going into this past weekend, some in the world of sports (I’m looking right at you, Sports Illustrated) tried to argue that the Oscar De La Hoya-Floyd Mayweather Jr. “superfight” was going to save the sport of boxing. Two problems with this argument: First, even before the fight began, the argument was flawed because in order for the fight to save the sport, fans would need to believe that it was a precursor to, a harbinger of other similarly great fights to come. With a fragmented heavyweight division (four different champions holding belts from four different organizations), corruption rampant and a discernable lack of great, interesting fighters, there aren't any must-see fights on the horizon. Second, the fight itself was good but not great, and most definitely not a fight for the ages. Mayweather won a split decision, hardly the kind of highlight-reel result that a dramatic knockout or even a unanimous decision would have been. This fight didn’t have the potential to save boxing before it took place, and an underwhelming performance meant it didn’t live up to whatever life-giving ability it might have had for the sport of boxing. There was no blood spilled and no knockout punch, which in turn means it might have been a night where the real losers were those hoping that boxing was about to be saved.
- Until now, I’d thought of Jo Theismann in positive terms, mostly as an accomplished NFL quarterback from years past and a decent game analyst for broadcasts. Now, however, I’m rethinking that evaluation because Theismann opened his mouth and uttered one of the single dumbest sports-related comments I’ve heard in a long time. He cracked on Cleveland Browns’ draft pick Brady Quinn for not looking “businesslike” at the draft, with the criticism apparently based on Quinn’s longish hair with heavy doses of styling products and his chewing of gum (gasp!) on camera at the draft. Who the frak cares, Joe? What kind of moron worries about whether an NFL quarterback’s hair is too long and if he chews gum on camera? I know you want to contend that image is important and that players, especially quarterbacks (the leaders of most teams) need to look like leaders, but this isn't the 1950s, so short hair isn't a necessity and the school principal isn't going around demanding students spit their gum into the wastebasket. Quinn’s hair has no effect on his play, nor does it affect his ability to lead. Call me loco, but if you’ve got integrity, character, strength and charisma, your teammates will follow your lead, especially if they know they can count on you. You can have green hair down to your waist if you want and it doesn’t matter 1/1,000th as much as your character and integrity. Stick to your gig in the Monday Night Football booth…..oh, wait, you got booted from that gig, didn’t you Joe? Oops. Well, at least you can take solace in knowing that your hair is nice and neat and you didn’t chew gum on camera, and isn't that what really matters?
- Spencer Tunick is either a unique artist or the world’s most successful pervert…..or a combination of the two. Tunick is the photographer who creates controversy in cities around the globe as he travels to photograph large crowds of people who all agree to pose nude en masse for a picture. The latest shoot took place over the weekend in Mexico City, where more than 18,000 individuals struck a variety of poses for Tunick’s lens. I don’t so much take issue with the concept of a massive nude photo shoot; my issue is what kind of screening process Tunick has for subjects in his pictures. If he simply accepts anyone who’s willing to show up and pose, that’s not good. There are just far too many people out there who should never, ever, ever be seen by anyone, anywhere without several layers of very bulky clothing concealing their out of shape, overweight, pale and pasty bodies. Just as there should be licensing guidelines for anyone wishing to purchase and wear spandex clothing for the same reason, Tunick should be required to screen out these types of people from his pictures. Residents of the cities he takes pictures in should not be subjected to the possibility of walking through town and having to see some 5’10, 250 lb. person without their clothes on, that’s just not right. And before you go criticizing this viewpoint as mean-spirited and superficial, ask yourself if you really want to see a sight like the one I just described……didn’t think so.
- No longer will the word lynx be solely associated with a near-anonymous women’s basketball team from the state of Minnesota. While the WNBA franchise whose mascot is the exotic jungle cat sadly remains operational thanks to the continued subsidy of the NBA, the lynx is garnering additional attention thanks to a group of IQ-depraved thieves in Johnstown, Pa. who decided that stealing one of the huge exotic animals was a good idea. These Mensas duct-taped a central Pennsylvania breeder (who refused to sell them a lynx without a proper license) of the rare cat to a chair and tried to steal a male and female lynx, but couldn’t get the two animals out of their cages and into a trailer. They then un-taped the breeder and forced him to corral the cats, but that too failed and so the thieves made off with the female cat and gave the breeder $2,000 for it. A few days later, a large cat was spotted near Plymouth, Pa. and wildlife authorities tranquilized the animal and found it to be the stolen lynx. So to review, the three thieves gave up $2,000, got possession of a lynx that they then lost and are now being sought by police. Well-crafted plots like this are what enable law enforcement officers to appear as if they are actually winning the war on crime as opposed lo lucking out with criminals whose intelligence ranks slightly above that of your average lamp post.
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