Karma bites the Yankees, a riot by Chinese farmers and what I want Exxon Mobile to do

- Props to the NBA for showing us what those three letters really stand for: No Balls Association. The league decided that there should be a two-day break between games of the Eastern Conference finals even though the Cavaliers and Pistons aren't changing locations for Game 2. It’ll be in Detroit, just as Game 1, but the league refused to schedule the second game on Wednesday night, supposedly because of an irrational fear of competing with the American Karaoke finale for viewers. Way to man up and show the tough, balls to the wall attitude that sports are supposed to embody, No Balls Association. You’re afraid to compete with a bunch of glorified karaoke singers, one of whom may or may not be a transvestite (Sanjaya whatever-his-last-name-is), a trio of judges comprised of a bitter, uninteresting, pub-hungry Brit, a pill-popping former Laker Girl and a fat black dude who serves no apparent purpose at all - for anything. Yeah, because the people who are dedicated NBA fans are exactly the same people who watch AK. This is just one more reason why the NBA will never, ever be as interesting or legitimate a basketball entity as NCAA hoops and why the NCAA Tournament is bar none the best sporting event in the world, because it doesn’t kowtow to a glorified karaoke contest or anything else in its scheduling.

- Never let it be said that Minnesota legislators don’t know how to party. Just a few hours after gaveling the 2007 session of the state legislature to a close, the president of the Democratic-led Minnesota Senate, James Metzen, was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving. Metzen was weaving back and forth in his lane and driving erratically, which I am confident in saying (even though I am not a law enforcement professional) is a very good indicator of someone driving drunk. Metzen seems to have wasted no time making a mad dash to a local inn popular with lawmakers and downing a beer or eight at a celebration of the end of another “grueling” legislative session. Good to see that someone who plays a major part in creating laws and sculpting the government for his state is so dedicated to following those same laws he helps put in place. Something tells me that the first bill proposed to the legislature in Minnesota next session will be a measure to increase the legal limit for intoxication to .25-ish.

- When your company is responsible for one of the biggest environmental disasters in modern times, you really should just pay whatever the courts order you to pay and not complain. Exxon Mobil Corp. refuses to go quietly into the night by ponying up the $4.5 billion in damages that a federal appeals court ordered it to pay as restitution for the damage caused by the 1989 Valdez oil spill that contaminated 1,500 miles of the Alaskan coastline and killed thousands of wildlife creatures. Exxon could still appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court and knowing the reluctance of major international corporations to part with any of the money they wring out of consumers, that’s exactly what Exxon will do. The company’s attorneys argue the fine is excessive, but then again so is the damage they did to the environment. I’d call dumping millions of gallons of oil into the water and killing all those animals is excessive too. Pay what you owe, Exxon, and in the future do a better job of making sure you don’t hire some drunken lush as a captain for your tankers so you won't have to worry about another mess like the Valdez spill.

- Riot time, riot time! If there’s a political, social or economic-based uprising anywhere in the world, you know I’m down. Today, the uprising de jour, as it were, comes to us from the southern Guangxi region of China, where authorities detained 28 people after thousands of local farmers rioted to protest fines levied on those who have had more children than allowed under the country’s family planning policy. Basically, the Chinese government only allows one child per family in order to put the skids on out-of-control population growth, and these fines are a way of enforcing the policy. Ah, the joys of Communism, dictating to people how many children they can have and what their family is allowed to consist of, you gotta love it. Not that the big, bad Chinese government is going to abandon its controlling ways and give these people a break, but props to the people of the southern Guangxi region for taking the fight to The Man anyhow………

- Does anyone else think it’s poetic justice that the New York Yankees are seeing two of their biggest free-agent signings of the past five years go up in flames/down in ‘roids? Jason Giambi and Carl Pavano both came to New York for $100 million-plus contracts, but each has been a major disappointment to the Bronx Bombers in his own special way. Giambi battled health problems early on, mysteriously apologized for something shortly thereafter, the something that was steroids but he wouldn’t say explicitly, and since then he’s been producing less and less of the power and offense he was brought in for. Now, Giambi gave an interview in which he hinted even further at using ‘roids and also reportedly tested positive for amphetamines, also banned by baseball, and the Yankees are considering voiding his contract. Pavano rewarded the team’s faith in him by accumulating a measly five wins in his entire Yankee career, and now he’s headed for major reconstructive surgery after his umpteenth injury. For more than $200 million, that’s what the Yankees now have, a washed up slugger whose contract they want to void and a broken-down pitcher who may never throw another inning for them. Yes, the Yankees can afford to write off these mistakes more than any other team because of their deep pockets, but it’s still great to see them suffer, because for me and millions of baseball fans worldwide, it’s a beautiful thing………….