I teach aspiring criminals another lesson, angry Venezualans stage a gutsy riot and a slice of musical enjoyment just for you

- My seminars for criminals haven't gotten up and running yet because I’m still working on the curriculum, but it looks like I’d better hurry and get this project rolling because lives are being ruined because I’m not helping the less intelligent criminals among us. For example, the second lesson in my curriculum would be especially helpful to Atlanta Falcons quarterback Mike Vick, who had been getting intense heat for alleged dog fighting going on at a house in Virginia that he owns. However, the initial outrage had died down and it appeared that Vick’s vehement and consistent denials of any wrongdoing were going to hold up because there just wasn’t any evidence against him. Here’s where Lesson #2 in my series comes in: when lying to cover up a crime, be sure that there aren't credible witnesses out there who are willing and able to contradict the story you’re selling. A witness who describes himself as a regular in the world of dog fighting, a man who claims he has trained thousands of canines for combat, revealed to ESPN’s Outside the Lines that in 2000, one of his dogs squared off against a dog owned by someone he referred to as one of the “heavyweights” of the dog fighting world: Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick. “He's a pit bull fighter,” the source said of Vick. “He's one of the ones that they call 'the big boys': that's who bets a large dollar. And they have the money to bet large money. As I'm talking about large money -- $30,000 to $40,000 -- even higher. He's one of the heavyweights.” Damn. That kind of contradictory evidence isn't going to help your case, Mike. The interview this anonymous source gave to OTL goes into great depth and contains detailed accounts of encounters between the source and Vick, with those stories involving large amounts of cash and lots of dog fighting. What had been a dying investigation has new life, and if Vick had learned Lesson #2 in my seminar for criminal plotting, he could have saved himself the embarrassment and shame of lying boldly and continually to everyone about his involvement with dog fighting and the punishment he ends up receiving wouldn’t have been so bad, because he could have just been honest and forthright from the start and then everyone wouldn’t have the added anger of being lied to in the back of their minds as they pass judgment on the “Heavyweight of Dog Fighting.”

- Chicago must be the new L.A. Used to be that police brutality was a SoCal thing, but the men in blue in the Windy City are beginning to establish their own credentials when it comes to viciously pummeling civilians. A couple weeks ago, three officers were charged with an array of crimes in conjunction with the beating of two men at an upscale Chicago bar, now another CPD officer has been arrested for an off-duty beating of a 15-year-old high school student. Roberto Gallegos is charged with aggravated battery after he reportedly gave a Juarez High School student a broken jaw and other injuries in an attack that is most definitely not conduct becoming of a police officer. “To serve, protect and maim” is not, nor has it ever been the official motto of any police department, and the Chicago PD had better get its officers under control or the people of the city are going to start fighting back and demanding that something be done about the out of control hooligans in blue that are supposed to be policing their city.

- I know I’ve hit on this before, so I’ll keep this brief, but as I perused the TV listings for today, it struck me once again how utterly absurd it is that the NHL’s championship round, the Stanley Cup Finals, is in the Versus network. Here’s a sport that once considered itself on the same level as the NFL, MLB and the NBA, and yet its ultimate happening, the series to decide the league’s title, is on a network that an overwhelmingly large portion of America doesn’t have access to. I can't even begin to imagine the World Series or NBA Finals being relegated to a secondary, peripheral network, and if the NCAA Tournament was on any channel I didn’t have access to, I’d be the first one with a crow bar and burning torch looking to start a riot. Thankfully, with a Canadian team in the Stanley Cup Finals, half the games in the series won't even be on American soil, so it’ll be even easier to forget that the games are going on at all. Then again, nearly all of America does a good job of forgetting about them anyhow, so maybe we don’t need the help.

- This music recommendation is a bit tardy, as the album in question came out on September 26, 2006, but I’ve enjoyed it so much since discovering it last week that I’d be remiss if I didn’t give the artist major props, tardy or not. The album is Colorblind by Robert Randolph & the Family Band, and the experience of hearing this CD for the first time was one of the best musical thrills I’ve had in quite a few months. Randolph and his band bring an amazing fusion of rock, blues, jazz, funk and more together and over the course of the 11-song album, there are at least five songs I would describe as flat-out awesome. Ain’t Nothing Wrong With That is the single you’re most likely to have heard/seen the video for, and it is absolutely one of those five top songs. With wicked guitar riffs, great harmonies, innovate percussion in the form of stomps and clapping and a fast, rollicking pace, it kicks off the album in style. Homecoming has some hip-hop, old school flavor to it, some funky bass lines, a bluesy guitar backing and takes you down home to in rockin’ style. Collaborations with Leela James, Eric Clapton and Dave Matthews give an extra boost of star power to an album that would be great even without them. It’s tough to find rock that has soul and can incorporate funk, jazz and blues while still maintaining good rock cred, but Robert Randolph & the Family Band manage to do that and much more on what is one of the two or three best albums I’ve heard in the past year, no doubt.

- Oppression Update time: Police in Caracas broke up a massive opposition protest in the country’s capital city using water canons and tear gas after protesters gathered to demonstrate against President Hugo Chavez’s decision to shut down the country’s most widely watched TV channel. Hundreds of angry Venezuelans gathered to voice their anger about Chavez’s decision not to renew the license of Radio Caracas Television, an independent station that he believes played a role in a failed 2002 coup against him. The protesters might have thought they were at a giant block party with the huge water canons, but when the tear gas was shot, I’m pretty sure they knew things were going downhill. The soaked dissidents scattered temporarily, but in a tremendous show of chutzpah, they regrouped, marched to the state telecommunications commission offices and stared down riot police while singing the national anthem. A big, hearty, Stick It To the Man salute to all those Venezuelan protesters, not many people have the testicular fortitude to reassemble after police try to disperse them, then march down the street and stare down riot police while singing their national anthem. If only Chavez and his administration had half the amount of balls and sheer tenacity these protesters did, Venezuela would be a lot better off.

- Maybe bad reviews can sink even the biggest super-movie. Following lukewarm analysis of its plot and execution, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End came in with weekend tallies of $126 million, which is a new Memorial Day weekend record, but not nearly enough to match the loot brought in on the first weekend of the last movie in the Pirates series or by Spiderman 3. Don’t feel too bad for producer Jerry Bruckheimer and the film’s cast and crew, though, as the movie has already more than earned back the $300 million spent on production when you factor in the take from international showings. The good-but-not-overwhelming response to this movie does make you wonder if those in charge will reconsider making a fourth movie in the series, which they definitely left the door open for based on the way they ended At World’s End. I for one hope they end the series here, because from the first movie in the trilogy to the third, the films have gotten progressively worse and with Keira Knightley not willing to be part of a fourth edition of Pirates, ending things here is the right decision.