$532 billion in mistakes, plus more teachers who can't keep their hands to themselves

- After watching nearly every minute of coverage on CBS for the NCAA Tournament’s first two rounds, three disturbing trends have come to the forefront. First, the strategy of fouling to extend the game has gotten out of hand. The practice has grown much more common in recent years, with a team on the losing end of the score intentionally fouling the other team, sending the leading team to the free throw line. The hope is simply for the team in the lead to miss it’s free throws and for the trailing team to get the ball back quickly and make their own shots to catch up. Unfortunately, things have gotten a little absurd…..OK, they’ve gotten extremely absurd. Now you have teams down by 17-18 points or so with less than a minute to go, still fouling. The clock ticks down under 20 seconds, they trail by 14 points, yet they foul away. Look, losing team coaches, we all get that you don’t like to lose and don’t want to admit defeat, but this is taking that to the insane extreme. You are no longer brave, courageous and fighting til the bitter end; you are instead pathetic, stupid and prolonging a game that is O-V-E-R to the extent that every fan in the arena, both your fans and the other team’s fans, are openly booing every idiotic foul. Give it up, because you’re turning games into two and a half hour monstrosities. My second beef is with coaches who take last names off of the back of your team’s jerseys in some misguided attempt to show team unity and togetherness. This is as hokey as it sounds, turning every player into an anonymous part of the whole, as if you are bringing everyone together and solving every team chemistry issue with that. Plain and simple, it’s a cheap, gimmicky trick that doesn’t do a darn thing to help your team win. Lastly, I am completely appalled that the concept of defense has essentially been boiled down to a player getting beat to the basket by the man he’s guarding, and one of the defender’s teammates trying to slide in and take the charge. There’s an attempt to take a charge, or more accurately a flop by a defender, on nearly every play so far in the tournament.

- What might you do with an extra $532 billion lying around? It’s an intriguing question, and one we as Americans could actually be considering if the ass hat in charge of our nation, W., hadn’t started and sustained the indefensible, idiotic war in Iraq. Estimates of the cost for the war show that between 2003 and 2008 (projected out, obviously), that $532 billion is the expected amount of appropriations and funds requested for the war effort. Better yet, more than 3,200 U.S. troops have been killed in Iraq, a staggering total that’s even worse than the massive financial hit. This could be crazy talk, but couldn’t $532 billion help fix a whole lot of roads, help thousands of displaced and decimated families in the Gulf Coast region rebuild after Katrina and provide a whole lot of help for a Social Security system that is struggling badly and seems headed for disaster? Aren't those immediate needs within our own borders far more important than some unnecessary war with no point, no relevant purpose (as far as Americans are concerned) and no end in sight? Thanks for wasting hundreds of billions of dollars on this, W., this alone is reason for the next ten generations of Americans to retroactively hate you and to look back on yours as the single worst presidency in American history. You suck.

- Ever question how sanitary and safe that cafeteria food at your elementary, junior high or high school is? Or maybe it’s your kids who are now subjected to the questionable edibility of macaroni and meat, Salisbury steak and vegetable medleys. Regardless, it has to be disturbing to find out that an average of one in 10 schools don’t receive the bi-annual health inspections mandated by Congress in order to prevent food poisoning. It is stunning, I know, that people do not comply with what Congress orders, especially since the federal government itself has failed to meet energy specifications set for appliances and other utility products despite 34 different deadlines being set in the past few years. One of the common violations that go overlooked in cafeterias that do not receive proper inspections is storing food at incorrect temperatures, which I’m sure isn't a problem either. Those meat-like products America’s children are served certainly can't spoil if they’re kept at the wrong temperature, can they? Oops, maybe they can…..and while you’re chewing on that thought, know that not only are 10 percent of school cafeterias not inspected at all, another 29 percent receive only one inspection per year, not the mandated two. Yup, we’ve got us another prime example of governmental efficiency and effectiveness at its best.

- Teacher-student hook ups are becoming more and more common, but two sex scandals popping up on the same day, with one ending in a fatality is excessive. The fatality came in Knoxville, Tenn., where an 18-year-old who was having an affair with his married, 30-year-old teacher was fatally shot at that teacher’s home with the husband of the teacher the prime suspect. Yeah, I’d imagine coming home to find your wife getting at it with one of her students would be upsetting, but pulling a gun and shooting the guy? You go that route and what you’re saying is, “Hey, I’d rather spend the rest of my life in prison than hire a divorce lawyer, give my wife the boot and go about building a new life.” Not the wisest option, even in the heat of the moment. Terrible as it is, that story doesn’t turn my stomach as much as this next one does. A first-grade teacher in Salt Lake City, Frank L. Hall, 36, has been charged with sexually abusing three students inside his classroom. Ironically, Hall was honored last year as one of the best teachers in Utah. This would be a bizarre turn, except late last year, a Pennsylvania teacher who won an award as the top teacher in her state was convicted of having sex with and providing alcohol for a male student. Still, it’s a lot less perverted than Hall’s offense, because anyone who would sexually abuse six-year-olds is just a vile, reprehensible person. I’m sure your future fellow inmates will take verrrrry kindly to you once they learn you’re a child molester, Frank. Something tells me you just might find out how those students you (allegedly) molested felt once you’ve spent some time behind bars.