Friday, June 12, 2015

Torii Hunter goes off, British Malaysian mountain porn and Idris Elba sings it out


- Life’s rough kids, so wear a helmet and learn to love getting sand kicked in your face. Some may argue that childhood is a time where you should get to be innocent, sweet and naïve, but those people are myopic fools who deny the true nature of the world. Thankfully, 8-year-old Andria Green and her 7-year-old sister, Zoey, will no longer be able to sleep walk through life and foolishly believe that people are good and kind and want to help them out. They know this because these two Texas girls found their lemonade stand on the receiving end of a governmental b*tch-slap that saw their operation shut down because they lacked a permit . This story went viral after a police officer on Monday approached the stand, which offered lemonade for 50 cents and "kettle korn" for $1. The officer, acting as a cold, harsh and unforgiving voice of reason, can be heard on the in-car dash camera video asking the girls' mother, Sandi Evans, for a permit. Evans tried to play dumb and claim that she didn’t know they needed one, but that didn’t fly with the officer. A family friend was dispatched to city hall to pick up a permit and while authorities waived the $150 fee, but said health department officials needed to inspect the stand. For the time being, the Evans sisters will take only donations for lemonade in their neighborhood of Overton, about 120 miles east of Dallas. So what’s the official stance on this one? Overton's police chief says police must follow state health guidelines and like it or not, there is no room for cute, adorable, bow-in-their-hair exceptions serving up under-sugared lemonade……..


- Actor Idris Elba isn't just famous for his good looks and acting ability. Sure, the start of “Luther” can act really well and he’s got an awesome look, but dude also has some pipes and he’s out to prove it again. Elba announced this week that he’s working on an album inspired by his TV show and he’s pitching the hell out of this thing, saying that it will make listeners feel like they are driving through London when they listen to it. Elba, who also appeared in the Academy Award-nominated “Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom,” announced a few months ago that he was hard at work on an album inspired by his Luther character, John Luther, and it sounds like he’s doing it very much from the perspective of blending his acting and music as much as possible. "From an actor’s point of view, doing music is very precarious. People are just not willing to accept it,” Elba said. “So I decided to keep my music close to what I do for a living, and make music from the perspective of the characters that I play.” Interestingly, Elba has released an album before, titled “mi Mandela,” which was also based on one of his projects. It was based on his character and the perspective of that movie, while “Murdah Loves John” is a perspective on his current character. As for the London link, there’s a reason for that too. "London’s a big character in ‘Luther’ and I’m trying very hard to make this album, when you put it in your car, to feel like you’re driving around to a soundtrack that reminds of the U.K., and of London especially,” Elba said. “I’m going to get a lot of new artists and voices that we haven’t heard before, and bring together a cool album." Probably so, E., because you’re a cool dude………..


- Eleanor Hawkins may be sorry now, but fans of mountain porn are not. Hawkins is now world-famous because she and nine friends decided to get naked on the side of a mountain in Malaysia and post photos of the display on social media. She was among four Western tourists detained in Malaysia's Sabah state this week for their role as part of a group of 10 who stripped naked at Mount Kinabalu on May 30 and then posted the photos, proving that social media is a loaded gun capable of shooting oneself in the foot anywhere in the world. While Hawkins was detained, her father tried to wage a public battle to get her released and claims that his fun-loving daughter knows what she did was "stupid and disrespectful" and is sorry for the offense she has caused to Malaysians. Hawkins' father, Tim, said she is "obviously quite scared and upset,” and judging from the response of local authorities, she has every reason to be. Not only is getting naked in public pretty damn disrespectful to the locals, but Sabah Deputy Chief Minister Joseph Pairin Kitingan has blamed the foreigners' "disrespect to the sacred mountain" for a deadly earthquake at the mountain on Friday. Granted, Eleanor Hawkins is hot, but even super-hot British women don’t generally have the power to cause earthquakes or other acts of God merely by showing off their awesome bodies. If Hawkins really does have this power, then Britain has just found itself a potent new weapon with which to reclaim its role as a true world power………


- Torii Hunter is one of the best guys in baseball. The veteran outfielder is in his second stint with the Minnesota Twins and he’s been beloved by fans and teammates at each of his three stops during his 18 seasons in Major League Baseball. He’s quick to crack jokes, soon to smile and genuinely seems to enjoy playing baseball for a living…with the possible exception of Wednesday night’s 7-2 loss to Kansas City. Hunter had himself a short night in Minneapolis because he was ejected from the contest for arguing a called third strike late in the Twins' loss to the Royals and chased that with the sort of tirade rarely seen from him. After having to be restrained following his ejection by plate umpire Mark Ripperger, Hunter proceeded to deposit the vast majority of his equipment on the field before he headed back to the clubhouse for the final few innings. Hunter tore off his elbow pad, shin guard, batting gloves and even his jersey threw them toward the batter's box after his ejection and wasn’t exactly backing off of his anger following the game. "We have bad days, all of us, as hitters, pitchers," Hunter said. "Even umpires have bad days, and he had one. I thought it was a ball. The pitch before that, I thought it was a little up. He called it a strike, that's fine. I thought the last pitch he called a strike was revenge because I said something about the pitch before that, because it was definitely a ball." During his on-field tirade, Hunter appeared to make contact with one of the umpires and could face a suspension from the league. "That's always a possibility," Twins manager Paul Molitor said. "I don't want to try and predict or speculate how the league offices are going to respond to his actions. Molitor also got himself tossed during the dispute, so he can't exactly be too hard on Hunter, even if it appeared for a moment that the veteran outfielder was going to fully disrobe on the field and take things to a really inappropriate place……..

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