Monday, June 01, 2015

Detroit's latest fiscal failure, The Doors' next cash grab and German asparagus harvester terrorists


- Want to know why police officers’ jobs are much harder than they need to be? In large part it’s because of morons like the one whose phone tip caused police in rural northeastern Germany to rush out to track down a reported mob of up to 15 people armed with knives and sticks, only to find a group of asparagus harvesters. Sure, are often called the Hell’s Angels of the agricultural worker community, but it was probably not necessary for a tipster to call the emergency number for police in the town of Ludwigslust to report having seen "10 to 15 people armed with knives and sticks" on a local road. The call must have been fairly convincing because within minutes, six police cars were on their way to the scene. Doing what had to have been some of their best police work in a long, long time, these insightful cops dug in and got to the heart of the matter, soon discovering that the group was asparagus harvesters walking along the road with their work tools as they went to take a lunch break. Thankfully, the quick thinking of the tipster and the fast reaction of the police helped avert a possible disaster of men and women brandishing their asparagus harvesting tools and reining down all manner of holy hell on the town of Ludwigslust. After their shakedown by the law, the workers got back to work harvesting white asparagus, which is a popular delicacy in Germany and a ubiquitous sight on restaurant menus in late spring………..


- Add one of the most iconic and enduring rock bands of all-time to the list. The list is comprised of artists who mysteriously had wonderful amounts of material to release and re-release and re-re-release years and even decades after the death of one or more key members of the group. It happens all too often with rappers and if the flow of unreleased Tupac and Biggie Smalls material ever dries up it will be stunning, but the trend now includes The Doors. Two albums recorded by the drug-addled rockers following the death of frontman Jim Morrison will be re-issued later this year in a shameless cash grab by Rhino Records. The label announced the re-issue of 1971's 'Other Voices' and 1972’s 'The Full Circle', their seventh and eighth albums from The Doors. In an effort to put a new layer of paint on something that true fans of the band already have and therefore must be induced to buy again, the re-issues feature remastered audio by 'Other Voices' producer Bruce Botnick, along with a rare bonus track 'Treetrunk', which was first released as a B-side to 'The Full Circle' single 'Get Up and Dance.' Oh, and these special vinyl editions will feature "historically accurate sleeves," including the expansive foldout zoetrope packaged with the original 'The Full Circle' vinyl.  Morrison, of course, famously was found in the bathtub of a Paris apartment in July 1971 at the age of 27 and following his death, the remaining members of the band – keyboardist Ray Manzarek, guitarist Robby Krieger and drummer John Densmore, continued the recording with Krieger and Manzarek sharing vocal duties. When  Manzarek died in 2013, it led to a reunion between Kreiger and Densmore, who fell out in 2002 when Krieger and Manzarek began touring as The Doors Of The 21st Century. Now, these two can band together in the name of capitalism and coax some more money out of the band’s legacy………..


- Good, just what Detroit needed. The United States’ first bankrupt major city has enough financial headaches circling the streets of its post-apocalyptic hell hole of a town, so having a prison downtown that was deemed too expensive to complete and is now a $1 million-a-month anchor around the ankles of already tapped-out taxpayers isn't really idea. The jail was supposed to become a state-of-art lockup in the heart of the Motor City, but four years into the process and with construction costs totaling $150 million, the city bailed on the project. That was four years ago and these days, the Wayne County Jail sits empty among the ruins of a broken-down city, costing taxpayers upwards of $1.2 million in debt service and monthly upkeep costs for electricity, security and sump pumps. Hell, they’re even paying for off-site storage for pre-fabricated jail cells that will never be used. Groups like the Wayne County Taxpayers Association and Michigan Taxpayer Alliance are enraged by all of this and have urged the city to cut its losses and sell the prison to one of several parties who have shown interest. In typical bureaucratic fashion, county officials have yet to make a decision as to what to do with the facility and for each month that passes, a tidy $10,849 is being paid for security, $12,852 for sump pump maintenance and $15,000 for storing pre-cast jail cells. "Due to the county's financial state, anything done on the ... jail will just add to the deficit,” said Lloyd Jackson, a spokesman for Wayne County Executive Warren Evans. “Once the deficit has been solved, the county can move forward with options on whether to finish the Gratiot site or renovate the three existing jails. As the county makes progress on its recovery plan, it will better be able to solve the jail issue." Oh good, just tell everyone to chill and allow a government that has f*cked up a  a $300 million, 2,000-bed jail that would combine the other county correctional facilities at every possible turn to figure its sh*t out. That will go over very well………..


- Memo to parents of football players at Nauset Regional High School  in Massachusetts: If at any point this coming season you think you know more about the game than your son’s coach does….sit down and shut up. That’s because the man stalking the sidelines for Nauset will be none other than former Green Bay Packers coach Mike Sherman, who  was born in Norwood, Massachusetts, and lives in West Dennis, about 30 minutes from his new job in North Eastham. The man who coached Brett Favre and led the Packers from 2000 to '05, compiling a 57-39 record and making four playoff appearances, later spent four seasons as the head coach as Texas A&M and was most recently the offensive coordinator of the Miami Dolphins, who dismissed him after the 2013 season.  So why is he returning to the lowest levels of football and taking over for Nauset athletic director Keith Kenyon, who had coached the team the past five years? "I've been fortunate financially over the years, which is allowing me to do this," Sherman said. "Back in January I was looking for a place to have a football camp this summer, and Nauset High School came up. Then I heard they were looking for a head football coach. It took me a while to pull the trigger.” Sherman’s tenure at Nauset will begin with a camp for skill position players in June and at the age of 60, he admitted that when he moved back to the area one year ago, he thought he was done with coaching. Now, he won't be chasing a Super Bowl title or a national championship, but rather that elusive Massachusetts Interscholastic Athletic Association state title. Eyes on the prize, Sherm………

No comments: