- It appears FOX’s stellar record with reality TV shows continues unblemished, what with the network’s latest reality offering, Anchorwoman, debuting last Wednesday and promptly having the plug pulled on the show less than 24 hours later. The show took Lauren Jones, a former Miss New York winner and Miss America contestant, and dropped her at a Tyler, Texas TV station as a host of the station’s evening news. The idea, I think, was that hilarity would ensue when this ditzy blond beauty queen flubbed and gaffed her way through her new role, but the ratings and reaction for the show were so terrible that FOX’s execs killed it almost immediately. The show garnered a mere 2.7 million viewers, but those 2.7 million intelligence-deprived, friendless losers can catch the remaining six episodes of the show at Fox.com or at the show’s MySpace page. Just goes to show that you can take a swimsuit model and stick her on a TV screen, but if she’s fully clothed and attempting to do something other than show off her great rack, most viewers aren’t interested. Well, having a terrible show with a lame premise doesn’t help either, but you can’t deny that more men would have been interested if Jones had done her broadcasts in a thong and revealing bikini top. Considering that the show aired on FOX, I’m actually surprised the network didn’t take that route. But hey, there’s always next time…………
- God bless the U.S.A., where we don’t actually administer justice and punishment to wealthy, famous people, but we do allow their extradition to other countries that do want to administer such justice. On Friday, U.S. District Court Judge William Hoeveler rejected arguments by lawyers for former Panamanian dictator Manuel Noriega and ruled that the despotic politician could be extradited to France, where he faces charges that he laundered millions of dollars in drug proceeds through French banks. Noriega’s lawyers contended that his status as a U.S. prisoner negated the French request under the rules of the Geneva Convention. They pressed for his return to Panama, but instead it’s a one-way ticket for Manuel to the country where surrender isn’t just an option, it’s the only option and where showers are always optional. Best of luck with the Frenchies, M.
- “Sorry I tried to kidnap and possibly kill you, no hard feelings.” Those are the sentiments expressed in court by Lisa Marie Nowak, the former astro-nut about to go on trial for her attempt to kidnap a romantic rival in a bizarre astronaut love triangle. Nowak apologized to Colleen Shipman for “frightening you in any way” in their first direct communication of any kind since the attempted kidnapping. Not sure that such a weak apology makes up for driving halfway across the country with a cache of weapons and while wearing an adult diaper, but nice try Nowak. The apology came during a five-hour hearing in an Orlando courtroom in which Nowak’s attorneys argued for the removal of a court-ordered monitoring anklet she’s been sporting. I say we keep that anklet on, what with Nowak being a total whack job and all. Even Shipman admitted that that she’s still afraid of Nowak to this day. Bill Oefelein, the object of Nowak’s affections, has remained quiet the past few months, but if he’s smart, he already has a restraining order in place against Nowak. With crazy chicks like her, you can never be too careful.
- Indie rockers Rilo Kiley have been quiet for a while now, so their new album is flying under the radar despite being a very good listen. Under the Blacklight is 37 minutes of music that is a substantial departure from what most long-time fans of the band are expecting. The album has a decidedly seedy vibe throughout, as evidenced by the single The Moneymaker, released via the Internet earlier this summer. The accompanying video for the song features several veterans of the adult film industry discussing their lives and experiences in the business. There are heavier beats, slick guitar riffs and a generally stylized, polished feel throughout the album as well. Lead singer Jenny Lewis is all over the map vocally and on most songs, her vocals stand out decisively, mostly in a good way. There is at least one “traditional-sounding” Rilo Kiley song, The Angels Hung Around. Overall, it’s good to see one of the great indie bands of recent years back together following a hiatus in which Lewis guested on a song with The Postal Service and recorded her own solo album, Rabbit Fur Coat (a PETA favorite, no doubt). Under the Blacklight definitely deserves a slot in your iPod’s memory, even if it isn’t how you think Rilo Kiley “ought to” sound.
- George Clinton and the P. Funk Orchestra had it right, as it turns out. Music lovers undoubtedly remember Clinton growling on the band’s hit ‘70s song, “WAR! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!” That description could not encapsulate the new Jet Li movie War any better. If you’ve ever seen any one of Li’s previous films, then essentially you’ve already seen War. It’s the same as every other movie the guy has ever made, filled with complicated fight scenes, bloody shootouts, women taking their clothes off and mundane dialogue. Adding Jason Statham to the mix doesn’t help much either, as he’s essentially a British version of Jet Li. Statham is an F.B.I agent on the trail of a rogue assassin (actually named Rogue, imagine that) played by Li, who is in turn smack-dab in the middle of a war between the Yakuza (the Japanese mob) and the Triads (the Chinese international mob). Yes, this movie is so clichéd that it’s actually a mob flick, complete with every bad martial arts and mob movie cliché imaginable. I’ll spare you the details of the ending, most of which you could already guess anyhow, and you can spare yourself $10 and avoid wasting two hours of your time by not seeing this yawner.
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