Sunday, January 03, 2016

Tommy Lee left hanging, Russia v. Ukraine: Food Wars and Buffalo Bills quitters


- It’s hard to find a more disappointing team in the NFL this season than the Buffalo Bills, who entered the season with loads of bluster and bravado under new head coach Rex Ryan and have delivered on that hype to the tune of 6-9 and out of the playoff race entering the league’s final week of the regular season. Perhaps no player encapsulates the disappointment the Bills hath wrought this season than defensive end Mario Williams, who signed a six-year, $100 million contract with the Bills in 2012 but has looked totally lost in Ryan’s defense this season. The supposed defensive mastermind has asked pass rushers like Williams to drop into coverage more instead of rushing the quarterback, which helps explain why Williams has 17 tackles and four sacks after tallying 38 sacks and five forced fumbles in his first three seasons in Buffalo. As the season comes to a close and all indicators point to the Bills cutting Williams and saving $12.9 million in the process, let’s just say he’s not exactly getting unwavering support from his teammates. The always-courageous anonymous teammate laid Williams out, suggesting the star lineman has all but stuck a Forever stamp on this season and mailed it in.  “It’s been clear to me that Mario doesn’t care about anybody but himself,” the teammate said. “He followed that up by not giving any effort during the season and complaining about the scheme instead of manning up and saying he played like crap and doesn’t care.” Saying a player quit is just about the most offensive thing a teammate can say because it questions that player’s integrity, character, heart and honor all in one fell swoop. “Totally checked out,” that anonymous teammate added. Not exactly the most stand-up thing to do, laying out a teammate anonymously, but it does give you an idea of what has ailed the Bills this season………


- Who doesn’t enjoy international pissing matches over basic dietary staples with the everyday well being of average men, women and families being kicked around like a cheap soccer ball? That’s why it’s so much fun to see Ukraine channel its inner spoiled 8-year-old brat and introduce a wide-ranging ban on food imports from Russia in a week, a snarky response to Russia's ban on food products from Ukraine. In a decree published on Ukraine's government website, the world was informed that imports including meat, fish, vegetables, fruit and dairy products will be banned as of Jan. 10. Russia threw the first punch here when its ban came into effect on Friday and in the biggest, most random coincidence of all, Russia’s sucker punch came in the wake of Ukraine's decision to implement a free trade pact with the European Union. Oddly enough, Russia is a fan of maintaining an iron grip on former Soviet republics that broke away from its control years ago. In defense of its ban, Russia claimed its ban on Ukrainian food imports is necessary to protect its internal market. This isn't the first time the two countries have engaged in tit-for-tat bans on various goods and services and it was just a few short months ago that Russia and Ukraine imposed bans on air travel between the countries by each other's airlines. On the upside, at least Russia didn’t invade a portion of Ukraine’s territory and annex the land for the hell of it, eh Crimea…………


- If every there was a sign that it’s time for Motley Crue to hang it up - no pun intended - this is it. Drummer Tommy Lee had himself a night during the Crue’s final show on New Year's Eve, with his rollercoaster-style drum set up failing in mid-air, leaving him suspended above the crowd. Lee has dubbed the elaborate drum set-up 'The Cruecifly’ and it features Lee positioned on a rollercoaster track on his drum platform. His drums are bolted to the platform and in the name of showmanship, the drummer is swung upside down as he plays so the audience can see his drumming in detail. Unfortunately for him, sh*t goes wrong when you have a major production and an elaborate stage, so when the show can off the rails - or got stuck on them - he was dangling upside down and tried to battle through the awkward situation. "It looks like the rollercoaster is broken. Well, f*ck the rollercoaster,” Lee shouted. “Come on, guys, help. Come get me. I can't believe this is happening on the last night. I knew something wasn't right when I took off." It was an ignominious final night for a guy who was once the coke-snorting, groupie-sexing madman at the center of the chaos for one of the hardest-partying rock bands around, but Lee has since become a dude who does reality TV shows, makes solo pop albums and has generally lost a lot of the edge he once had. At least, final pun intended, he was able to go out on a high note……….


- What could possibly go wrong when a low-level elected official in a Southern town publicly calls for citizens to launch caveman-esque attacks on local law enforcement officers merely trying to do their jobs? Mississippi Gov. Phil Bryant just needs to calm down and appreciate the bold leadership tactics of Jackson Councilman Kenneth Stokes, who suggested last week that police officers from surrounding jurisdictions put Jackson children in danger when they pursue suspects wanted for minor crimes into his neighborhood. “What I suggest is we get the black leadership together, and as these jurisdictions come into Jackson we throw rocks and brick and bottles at them,” Stokes said. Umm, no? The suggestion by Stokes that going full-scale riot tactic on the cops will send a stern message to officers who want to track down young men who steal bubble gum is misguided and idiotic at best and not simply because Stokes is suggesting that residents of his area be allowed to commit small crimes with no repercussions. The governor was having none of it, denouncing the remarks in a Facebook post and calling for an investigation to determine if Stokes’ comments “represent criminal threats against law enforcement officers.”  “Mr. Stokes’ remarks are reprehensible, particularly with the attack we have seen against our men and women in law enforcement,” the governor said. “I condemn any such remarks in the strongest possible manner. This is not short of an outright assault upon all who wear the badge.” Bryant plans on asking Attorney General Jim Hood to investigate, but Stokes isn't backing down and insisted that the officers coming into his neighborhood to pursue suspects don’t respect human life. Good message to send to the community, councilman……….

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