- University of Michigan fans have been seeing plenty of
worthless football in recent years. If athletic
director Dave Brandon has his way – and if he’s still gainfully employed by UM
next year – the price to see that worthless football will at least more closely
match the actual price printed on the tickets that people are trading away for
cases of beer and kegs. Brandon, trying to make amends with the
Michigan student body, announced a significant drop in student football
ticket prices for the 2015 season. Students are currently ripped off to the
tune of $280 for a season pass, but next year it will drop down to a still
absurd $175. Sadly, non-students won't see their ticket prices drop in
correspondence to the quality of the product on the field. "A nearly 40
percent reduction in ticket prices is, I think it's fair to say,
unprecedented," Brandon said. Hey Dave, know what else is unprecedented?
Michigan being a perennial also-ran in a so-so Big Ten and struggling to amass
enough wins to qualify for even a lower-tier bowl game. High ticket prices are
among fans’ many beefs with Brandon and have been a chief complaint among those
calling for his head on a pike being paraded through campus. Online petitions,
campus protests and public appeals to the university's Board of Regents are
just a few of the avenues the student body has used to demand the firing of the
embattled athletic director. Lowering ticket prices is a better idea than Brandon’s
previous pitch to hold regular open forums where students can ask him questions
and submit ideas in the future. Giving angry, jaded college students with
hangovers and little sleep an open, public forum to make snide remarks to you
is rarely a brilliant idea………..
- Americans making fools of themselves abroad is something of
a standing international tradition and two American priests studying in Rome are
keeping that tradition alive and well with a viral dancing effort not as
terrifying as ebola, but embarrassing nonetheless. Rev. David Rider of Hyde
Park, N.Y., and the Rev. John Gibson, of Milwaukee, Wisc. first rose to
Internet fame thanks to a video that surfaced online showing them during a
fundraiser at the North American College, the elite American seminary up the
hill from the Vatican. Rider warmed up the crowd with an awkwardly awesome tap-dance
routine, but his time in the spotlight came to an end when Gibson elbowed his
way in with a fast-footed Irish dance. What followed was a one-upmanship battle
that left the crowd wondering what bizarro universe they had just stepped into.
Someone broke out their smartphone and filmed the dance battle and that someone
was Joan Lewis, who filmed the entire dance and later posted it on YouTube. "All
of a sudden the numbers started rising and rising," Lewis said of her
seemingly inauspicious post. The video has garnered more than 260,000 views and
drawn comparisons to Sr. Cristina Scuccia, who won the Italian edition of
"The Voice" in June with a series of unadorned pop song performances,
in full habit. Scuccia has since scored a recording contract and h er first
album features a cover of Madonna's "Like a Virgin." Sadly, no
YouTube post can exist without haters bashing those responsible and trolls have
dared to suggest that the priests shouldn't have been dancing under a crucifix and
a painting of Pope Francis, calling it "disrespectful." "We
would just refer them to the Bible," Rider says, "where the Lord
tells us to live with joy." Way to fight back, weirdo………
- Ethan Hawke, you’re next. Hawke becomes the latest actor
to channel is inner wannabe recording artist by portraying a musical legend on
the silver screen. He will play jazz trumpet legend Chet Baker in the forthcoming
biopic “Born to be Blue.” Only
hardcore jazz fans will know the story of Baker, who rose to fame and fell just
as spectacularly in the 1950s before making a comeback two decades removed from
his time playing with the likes of Charlie 'Bird' Parker. Landing Hawke is a
coup for Canadian filmmaker Robert Budreau, who has already begun production in
Ontario with a cast that also includes Carmen Ejogo (The Purge: Anarchy) and Callum Keith Rennie (Fifty Shades Of Grey). "The
story will chart his comeback in the late 70s and the tumultuous love affair
that changed the way he played music and helped him on the road to redemption after
his self-destructive ways had seemingly destroyed his career,” Budreau said of
the picture. Baker, like musical icons such as Johnny Cash and so many others, spent
time in prison and battled addiction throughout his life. Telling his tale is
something of a passion for Budreau, who also made a short film about Baker's
passing, “The Death of Chet Baker.”
Again, like many musical icons before him, Baker died while on the comeback
trail and returning to the peak of his powers. At the age of 58, he was found
dead in his hotel room in the Netherlands and his death was deemed accidental
after it was discovered he had taken a combination of cocaine and heroin. Drugs
and Amsterdam never go together, so seeing that one coming was nearly
impossible. Having Hawke on board in the role of Baker could be a disaster or a
home run, with the odds of anything in between slim at best……..
- The smartest people are rarely pulling off the dumbest
crimes. Enter Welshman Alan Knight, accused of stealing more than $64,000 from the
bank account of an elderly neighbor with Alzheimer's disease. Yes, dude
capitalized on someone losing their mental capacities and memory and somehow
did not immediately have a lightning bolt from God strike him dead. After his
thievery, Knight went double-d-bag by impersonating a handicapped person in
order to avoid arrest. He pretended to be quadriplegic and sometimes comatose
for two years to avoid the long arm of the law. Police began investigating and
that’s when Knight began faking paralysis, claiming to be quadriplegic and so
sick he sometimes fell into a coma. Knight, a resident of Swansea, Wales, checked
himself into a hospital to avoid court appearances, saying he was having
seizures. His wife, Helen Knight, claimed her husband had obtained a doctor's
letter certifying he was "quadriplegic and in a comatose condition,
bed-bound at home" after a neck injury. "We've been through absolute
hell and we're still going through hell," Helen Knight claimed. Yes, YOU
are going through hell, scumbag. Alan Knight may have continued to fend off the
tentacles of justice if not for security cameras that caught him driving and
walking around supermarkets shopping for groceries. Police were tipped off when
they tracked Knight’s use of his supermarket card and that allowed them to
track him down and prosecute the hell out of him – which is probably where he’s
headed. Heck, this d-bag even arrived at Swansea Crown Court in a wheelchair
and neck brace. He was summarily convicted of 19 counts of forgery, fraud and
theft and will be sentenced Nov. 7 to a jail term that will surely fall short
of actual justice for his heinous crimes………
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