Saturday, December 15, 2012

Coke smuggled in your new boobs, Frank Ocean one and done and texting while walking hazards


- Frank Ocean: music’s next voluntary one-hit wonder? Ocean, whose album “Channel Orange” has been extremely successful commercially since its release in July, may be Ocean’s one and only venture into the recording industry, at least as an artist. He appears to have other interests driving him right now and suggested recently that he is considering whether to quit making music and write a novel instead.
 "Some people focus more on sonics. Some people focus more on story. I focus on both sonics and story,” Ocean explained. But storytelling's a different thing. It's the more interesting part about making music for me, or making albums and songs and stuff. So much so that I might not make another album. I might just write a novel next. I don't know." Ocean said he finds storytelling the most interesting part about creating music, which explains why he’s kicking around the same aspiration as millions of aspiring writers around the globe as they try to get some traction toward writing that epic first novel they’ve had a great idea about for years. There is something to be said for a person who doesn’t continue in a job, career or endeavor simply because it’s making them famous and making them a lot of money. Being willing to reassess one’s life on the fly and make adjustments even though the sky isn't falling takes strength and Ocean either has a lot of it or he’s merely being a typical flaky musician. "The idea of recognizing your strengths and using them in as versatile a way as you can is cool to me,” he said. I don't ever want to be caught up in a system of thinking I can do one thing cos that's just…that's just telling yourself a lie. This isn't a faux retirement. It's no bullsh*it.” If Ocean does finish his novel quickly, he could also move on to his next dream, which apparently is designing an arena in Stockholm in 2014………


- Being a drug mule is all about staying one step – or one surgical procedure – ahead of The Man. That can mean swallowing narcotics in plastic baggies and crapping them out once you land in a new country, having them hidden inside a prosthetic limb or in extreme cases, surgically implanted in your body somewhere. Go ahead and add inside your surgically enhanced rack to the collection of places on that “somewhere” list after an unidentified Panamanian woman who flew in to Barcelona's Prat airport was found to have cocaine hidden in her breast implants. This carved-up drug mule arrived on a suspicious flight, did not have a plausible story for customs officials when asked about the nature of her trip and then there was the always-telling blood under her breasts. At that point, airport security officers were curious and when they did some investigating, the end result was a trip to an operating table for the passenger, who was found to have packets of cocaine hidden in her breast implants. Her flight was under heavier scrutiny because she was on a so-called "hot flight," one that came from a destination known for drug trafficking -- in this case Bogota, Colombia. When her vague answers didn’t add up, officers picked up on other suspicious behaviors and when a female officer patted her down, she found bloodied bandage material under the passenger's breasts. That gauze just happened to be covering incisions and the breasts were hiding "a white foreign material." The passenger explained that the implants were new and simply had not healed correctly, but that excuse didn’t fly. The next stop was a local hospital, where “a medical team extracted a bag-shaped prosthesis from each breast containing a white pasty substance," the Spanish interior ministry said. Cocaine. Nearly 3 lbs. of pure cocaine were found and at $35,000 a pound, that was a $105,000 new rack………


- In order for a team to be successful, it’s vital for its members to believe in themselves. For a team that’s easily among the worst in the NBA, belief is less of a requirement and more of a luxury. The Toronto Raptors are 5-19 and before their procured their fifth win of the season Friday night, forward-center Andrea Bargnani offered a blunt assessment his team’s place on the NBA landscape. Bargnani said during an interview with an Italian news organization that his squad is "pretty much the worst team in the NBA." Those are generally not the words an organization wants to hear from a player it made the first overall pick in the 2006 draft, especially not when that player is sidelined because of a torn ligament in his elbow and a strained right wrist. Bargnani was injured when he fell awkwardly on a dunk attempt during Monday night's loss at Portland and isn't expected back until at least early January. His assessment seems fairly accurate, given that before defeating Dallas on Friday night, Toronto had lost six straight and 12 of 13 and was ahead of only Washington (3-16) in the NBA standings. Bargnani also said that Toronto's start was "tragic" and "a desperate situation." Both descriptions seem excessive and Raptors coach Dwane Casey said Friday he intended speak to Bargnani about his remarks, but went on the reach for the weak excuse that it would be “no surprise” if the comments had been "lost in translation." Whatever you want to believe, coach…….


- Pigeons are filthy, irritating creatures who swarm helpless folks merely trying to eat their lunch or snack in the park. They poop on public property and they are essentially the rats of the avian world. Chicago Alderman James Cappelman (46th district) understands this all too well and that’s why he’s striking back at these winged menaces. Cappelman wants to make it a crime to feed pigeons and given that these bothersome birds are everywhere, his idea of generating feedback from all around the Windy City. Cappelman would outlaw the practice of feeding pigeons at places such as the Christkindlmarket at Daley Plaza – where dozens of pigeons gather every day, keeping warm by the eternal flame. To this end, the alderman has introduced an ordinance that would significantly increase the penalties for feeding pigeons – making it a crime punishable by up to six months in jail and a fine of up to $1,000. Those may sound like extreme fines for throwing stale bread crumbs on the ground, but harsh justice may be the only way to get would-be bird feeders to stop. This brilliant politician wisely told his fellow aldermen that he is tired of encountering a scene from a Hitchcock movie every time he walks to the Wilson station on the CTA Red Line. Those objecting to the stronger law are apparently ignorant of the fact that it is already a city code violation to feed pigeons – as signs around town indicate - punishable by a fine of up to $500. So far these signs seem to be having little effect and perhaps doubling the maximum fine and adding the possibility of up to six months in jail will get everyone’s attention. Cappelman’s connection to the issue is a direct and visceral one, as he was assaulted by a woman in Uptown in May he started sweeping away the breadcrumbs she had spread on the ground for pigeons near Broadway and Wilson Avenue. Yes, one of the crazy bird ladies in a filthy coat and who talks to herself and the birds like they are all her human friends was mentally unstable enough to attack someone for sweeping away stale bread crumbs on the ground. Here’s hoping the good people of Chicago see the light and rally behind this inspired idea………


- Texting while driving is the subject of numerous campaigns around the United States as law enforcement agencies and concerned citizens seek to stop the practice of thumbing out text messages from behind the wheel. Why is no one trying to combat the scourge of TWW (texting while walking)? According to a new study by the British Medical Journal's Injury Prevention group, TWW is becoming every bit as much of a problem as distracted driving and demands similarly strong countermeasures. According to these researchers, almost one in three pedestrians is distracted by a mobile device while crossing busy streets. Sure, a YouTube video of someone walking into a pole or falling flat on their face because they step into a hole in the sidewalk they failed to see because their nose was buried in their iPhone is funny, but the journal’s researchers pegged the danger of distracted walking at nearly the same level as distracted driving. "Texting while crossing the road is the most distracting, and potentially most dangerous, activity," the researchers wrote in their report. They based their findings on the behavior of more than 1,000 pedestrians crossing 20 busy junctions at various times of the day in Seattle during the summer of 2012 and found a full 24 percent of people distracted by talking, texting or listening to music on their mobile device. These distracted walkers took significantly longer to cross the road compared with pedestrians focused on walking— 0.75 to 1.29 seconds longer, to be exact. Furthermore, texters took almost two seconds longer to cross three to four lanes than non-distracted walkers, and were a full four times as likely to ignore lights, cross at the middle of the junction or step off the curb without looking both ways. The study focused on the 8 a.m.-9 a.m. rush hour period most of those monitored were between the ages of 25 and 44, the study said. "Crashes involving vehicles and pedestrians injure 60,000 people and kill 4,000 every year in the U.S. And just like distracted driving, distracted walking is potentially dangerous," the report stated. Look for that anti-texting-while-walking public address spot to appear on a television near you right around never………

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