Sunday, April 26, 2009

A Lost lawsuit, the high cost of government paranoia and Gatorade with a really, really bad idea

- File this under the heading of “Let it go, already.” I don’t care if a football game between two high schools is known as the No. 1 high school rivalry in the United States. It could be the best rivalry of all-time in the world, but that doesn’t justify trying to go back in time to resurrect a 16-year-old game that ended in a tie to find out the “real winner.” In 1993, Phillipsburg High School and Easton Area High School left the football field without a clear winner: a 7-7 tie. Back then, there was no overtime in high school games, and clearly there are many participants from the game who can’t let it go and move on in life. “I didn't know how to feel, stopping the end of my high school career being on a tie,” said Bruce Lebitz, an inside linebacker for the 1993 Phillipsburg team. Whoever initiated the idea to restart the game, that person is a tool. Because of their idiocy, a bunch of grown men in their early 30s will be taking the field and looking to settle a score that probably none of them are in any condition to settle. They had a mere eight weeks to get back in game shape, all in the name of one last stab at glory in the feud between the Stateliners of Phillipsburg, New Jersey, and the Red Rovers of Easton, Pennsylvania. The two schools are separated by the Delaware River but connected by their bitter football feud, played on Thanksgiving Day since 1906. The winner walks away with "The Fork of the Delaware" trophy. “We're two blue-collar communities. A lot of factory workers, people like that, that have so much in common," said Steve Shiffert, a former coach for Easton. "I think that's what makes it so unique that for a couple of hours on Thanksgiving morning, then we consider ourselves different.” Back in 1993, Easton was heavily favored to win the game and scored the first touchdown. Phillipsburg immediately answered with a touchdown of its own and the game remained scoreless the rest of the way. With about five minutes left, Easton was lining up for what should have been a gimme field goal, and a Phillipsburg player blocked the kick. Oh, and it turns out that the idiot organizing the reunion game isn’t one person, but rather a company: Gatorade. Te sports beverage company announced that it was organizing a replay and somehow managed to sucker NFL stars Peyton and Eli Manning into serving as honorary coaches for the rival teams. Worse yet, 10,000 to the game were sold in 90 minutes. A local sports training facility has even been helping these out-of-shape dudes get used to working out and training again, but don’t expect that to prevent the dozen or two pulled hamstrings and groins and the one or two inevitable major injuries in this game. Bad idea all around, I feel sorry I even know about it…….

- Grow a sense of humor and a heart, officials at Fawn Elementary School in the Highlands District of Pittsburgh, Pa. Suspending five fourth-grade students on a weapons charge because they dared to bind two pencils together with tape and tie rubber bands around them to make their own sling shots, then used them to fire paper clips, hitting a teacher and three other students, is no reason to suspend anyone. A weapons charge? Is that what they call goofing off in class and showing a little ingenuity? No one was hurt in the “attack” and at worst, these kids should get detention or no recess for a week. I wholeheartedly sympathize with Melanie Chelko, who is the parent of one of the suspended students. “This was not a weapon to them. This was a toy.” Well said, Mel. Principal Kathi Shirey and her minions need to get over themselves and stop treating a bunch of kids goofing off like the world is currently treating North Korea for launching a long-range ballistic rocket. “Everyone uses pencils while in school, but you would never think someone would use them to create a weapon, but that's exactly how the district sees it," said the principal. Shirey said the accused students bound "It’s an object that could have caused serious injury." Shirey said. Melanie Chelko had a very different take, saying that the boys were merely seeing who could flip the paper clip the furthest. What amazes me is the absolute arrogance of Shirey and the powers that be at the school, who said the boys faced expulsion for a year, but considering their age, she said the district decided to be lenient. Lenient? I realize a one-day suspension isn’t going to ruin a kid’s life and that these five boys were probably thrilled to have a day off from school, but booting them for a day and taking away one of their scheduled field trips is still ridiculous. What’s next, expelling a kid who uses his fork to fling mashed potatoes across the lunch room and starts a food fight? Well played, idiots…….

- It’s very rare that a movie that is intentionally sentimental and emotional in its aim hits the mark and doesn’t cross the line into being cheesy and over the top, but “The Soloist” manages to do so. The film is based on the true story of reporter Steve Lopez of the Los Angeles Times meeting a homeless man on the street playing Beethoven on the last two strings on a fiddle. By now, this story has gotten enough attention that you know the rest: the homeless man isn’t performing for the public, but rather playing happily to himself in the shadow of Beethoven's statue in Pershing Square in Los Angeles. The guy tells Lopez that his name is Nathaniel Ayers and that he went to Juilliard. Ayers’ story checks out and Lopez writes about it, telling the world about a musical prodigy who grew up in the ghetto, earned a scholarship to Juilliard School to play the cello, battled schizophrenia, flunked out and 20 years later wound up pushing a shopping trolley up and down Grand Avenue, playing violin for the birds. The story touches the hearts of many readers, one of whom sent a cello to the paper. Lopez delivers it to Ayers and soon finds himself connecting with him on a personal level. Lopez sees Nathaniel as a project of sorts and wants to move to a community shelter take his meds and resume his lessons. Writers Susannah Grant and Joe Wright manage to avoid many of the clichés and movie truisms that such films often rely on, which helps the plot significantly. Robert Downey Jr. plays the role of Lopez well and does a solid job of allowing the hurt of his own losses - his wife and kids, who have left him - to shine through. His own belongings are in boxes, not all that different from Ayers and his shopping cart full of possessions. Jamie Foxx is excellent as Ayers, even if he does take an unneeded backseat to Downey in some scenes. Flashbacks to Ayers’ childhood tell much of his story, but they aren’t the best parts of the movie by far. At times, Lopez’s commitment to Ayers seems on tenuous ground, but the hurt of losing his family because of similar shortcomings seem to drive him onward. The film also sheds some light on the faces of the homeless, faces most of us are all too willing to ignore in real life. Wright shares those faces with us -- old and young, odd, beaten down by life, but very, very real. For a film that runs 109 minutes, “The Soloist” could be even longer and you still wouldn’t have a real problem. All in all, an excellent movie in theaters that are usually filled by really crappy ones……

- What is the price of unjustified paranoia? For the taxpayers of Maricopa County, Ariz., the answer is two easy payments of $7,300. That’s what it would take to pay off the $14,600 bill that county leaders ran up by searching their offices for listening devices twice in the last six months. Maricopa County officials spent $10,000 to sweep the 10th-floor offices of the Maricopa County Administration Building last December, then doled out another $4,600 for a second security sweep in February. Yes, officials in Maricopa County clearly believe that the Mafia is operating in their area or that their county is the target of major terrorist organizations, because otherwise they’d look very foolish for wasting that sort of cash. But sadly, the explanation is much simpler and even more moronic than that. Board of Supervisors Chairman Max Wilson said county employees feared they were being spied on by Maricopa County Attorney Andrew Thomas and Sheriff Joe Arpaio. Yes, they worried that the county attorney and sheriff were spying on them. According to Wilson, those fears stemmed from Thomas’s indictment of Supervisor Don Stapley last December. Look, I realize that Arpaio is a blowhard, media whore of a law enforcement official who loves the cameras and is purposely controversial much of the time, but bugging the county offices? Seems a little ridiculous. Even so, said then-board chairman Andrew Kunasek signed off on the searches and did so at a time when supervisors have asked every county department to cut its budget to make up for an approximately $56 million budget shortfall in fiscal year '09 - '10. “It was to reduce tension so people could go right on functioning and doing their job,” Wilson said. “I think under the circumstances with what there concerns was ...that they did what they thought was right.” Huh? People were so badly rattled by one indictment that they couldn’t function in their jobs? Sounds like firing these nervous Nellies or getting them some serious psychological counseling may have been the more appropriate route. Of course, no bugs were found and now the officials have a very pissed off county attorney and sheriff watching their every move even more closely……..

- Apparently the crash survivors haven’t been the only thing lost on ABC’s hit drama Lost, not if you believe the claims in a lawsuit filed by a former member of the show’s production crew. The woman claims she was sexually harassed by Lost cast member Henry Ian Cusick (who plays Desmond Hume) and subsequently fired from the crew. According to the lawsuit, filed Friday in Los Angeles, Cusick fondled the plaintiff's buttocks and breasts and kissed her on the lips while working on Lost in October 2007. The woman, who was a production crew member at the time, claims she reported the incident to her supervisor, only to be told to avoid contact with Cusick. Twelve days later, the suit alleges that she was fired in an act of retaliation for reporting the incident. She has clearly decided that she has enough of a case to pursue it in court. Both Cusick and the network are named as plaintiffs in the suit, a suit I certainly hope isn’t true. It’s not that I don’t want one of my favorite shows dragged down by a legit claim of abuse; I just hope that Cusick isn’t enough of a scumbag to do what he’s alleged to have done. If he did, then this woman has every right to expect a hefty settlement from both he and the network. Also, if Cusick did what he’s accused of, he needs to apologize profusely and see if his hefty Lost salary can help him buy some class and common human decency. So far, the network, Cusick himself and his agent have yet to comment, so for now the allegations are all we have……..

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