- Here is a man you don’t want to see coming through the door at your holiday barbecue or all-you-can-eat buffet. Brad Sciullo of Clearfield, Pennsylvania has completed a Herculean culinary task that might even dwarf what legendary American eating champion Joey Chestnut. In a mere four hours and 39 minutes, Sciullo, a 5-foot-11, 180-pound western Pennsylvania chef, became the first person to eat a ginormous hunk of food called the Beer Barrel Belly Bruiser: a 15-pound burger with toppings and a bun that bring the total weight to 20.2 pounds. The mammoth mountain of meat is the creation of Denny's Beer Barrel Pub, about 100 miles northeast of Pittsburgh. Sciullo, admitted that even he was surprised to finish the sandwich.
“About three hours into it, things got tough,” he said. So what inspires a man to consume tens of thousands of calories in a gluttonous gorging for the ages? “I wanted to see if I could,” Sciullo stated matter-of-factly. Sorry my man, but that isn’t good enough, not when you eat a 15-pound burger topped with a bun, lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, onions, mild banana peppers and a cup each of mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard and relish. Pub owner Dennis Liegey said that because Sciullo was able to complete the challenge within the under-five-hour time limit, he won $400, three T-shirts and a certificate. What, no complimentary stomach pumping? No lifetime supply of antacids? It is an impressive feat, to be sure, but let’s just say I’m glad I wasn’t there to witness it, because I would have been equal parts terrified, amazed, disgusted and nauseated…..
- Now here’s an interesting campaign technique: falsely claiming that the opposing party “hates real Americans.” North Carolina Rep. Robin Hayes, a five-term Republican who has been heavily targeted by Democrats this election cycle, has gone to that anti-American blast as he is locked in a tight re-election race that has many predicting his ouster from Congress. He has admitted to telling a crowd of John McCain supporters that “liberals hate real Americans,” a not-so-subtle poke at Democrats that also has the nice side benefit of sucking up to those Hayes is courting by implying that they are “real Americans.” In true politician form, Hayes initially denied making the remarks, but finally ‘fessed up to the fact that he did say them Monday afternoon. “After reading it, there is no doubt that it came out completely the wrong way,” Hayes said. “I actually was trying to work to keep the crowd as respectful as possible, so this is definitely not what I intended.” You were trying to be respectful? How, by alleging that your opponents hate their country? Why not go all the way and call them Communists or terrorists? It doesn’t matter that the comments came at a McCain rally in Concord, North Carolina. The setting is irrelevant, just as it would be any time you say that, “Liberals hate real Americans that work and achieve and believe in God.” So not only do you call your opponents anti-American and anti-hard work, they are also anti-God? Dude, you are a colossal douche bag, period. So I now find myself with a vested rooting interest in a congressional race that is hundreds of miles and several states from where I live. I will be rooting for Hayes' opponent in North Carolina’s 8th district, just as I will be rooting for everyone other than that senile old bastard McCain in the presidential election….
- The year may change, the charges may vary, but the bottom line remains the same: juries in Southern California just can’t bring themselves to convict famous people of crimes they are almost certainly guilty of. It was true for (probable, almost assured) double murderer O.J. Simpson, it was true for killer Robert Blake, it was true for killer/music producer Phil Specter, and now it’s true - at least for the time being - for alleged unlicensed driver and confirmed atrocious singer/entertainer Britney Spears. A mistrial was declared in Britney Spears' driving-without-a-license case Tuesday because the jury in the case couldn’t reach a unanimous decision, with the final vote being 10-2 in favor of acquittal. The decision spares the pop skank sparing a criminal record for now because the jury's deadlock could not be broken, not even after Los Angeles Superior Court Judge James Steele permitted prosecution and defense attorneys to make additional closing arguments Tuesday morning. Can’t say I am surprised that Spears almost got off, what with the tendency of SoCal jurors to 1) be morons, 2) love famous people, and 3) get exponentially dumber when gathered in a room with 11 of their peers. This group of 12 IQ-deprived tools y struggled with the case since resuming deliberations Monday, voting five times before telling the judge they were hopelessly deadlocked. not surprisingly, deliberations lasted longer than the case itself, which featured only three witnesses and one day's worth of testimony and arguments. At the heart of the case is whether or not Spears’ Louisiana driver’s license made her a legal California driver when she was stopped in August 2007.
Spears never appeared during the trial. She is in the midst of a comeback, recently earning three MTV Video Music Awards. As her trial started last week, Billboard announced that her new single, "Womanizer," was No. 1 on its charts.
- Well lookee here, the alleged agreement between the Iraqi and U.S. governments to get our troops the hell out of a place they never should have been has hit a snag. Apparently, the Iraqi government has unanimously agreed that a security pact with the United States lacks “some necessary amendments,” words proclaimed by government spokesman Ali al-Dabbagh today. The particulars of the status-of-forces agreement were recently agreed upon by negotiators and would set the terms for U.S. troops in Iraq after the United Nations mandate on their presence expires at the end of this year. However, the agreement is now under being reviewed by the U.S. and Iraqi governments for final approval and in the Iraqi Cabinet’s regular session today, Al-Dabbagh asked the ministers to submit their amendments so they can be included in the negotiations with the Americans. Unfortunately for us, Al-Dabbagh didn’t say which parts of the agreement the ministers object to, but you knew they would have issues with something. Reaching this accord couldn’t be simple; it couldn’t be anything remotely resembling simple. One senior U.S. official, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said parts of the agreement could be reopened because of Iraqi objections to the language on jurisdiction for U.S. troops, the troop pullout dates and the conditions for troop pullout. However, our “esteemed” Defense Secretary Bob Gates said there was "great reluctance" to make any more changes to the agreement. At present, the agreement calls for U.S. combat troops to be out of Iraqi cities and villages by July 30, 2009, and out of the country entirely by December 31, 2011. The Iraqis can alter that and ask U.S. troops to stay longer if they wish for training and support purposes, and it also allows for an earlier withdrawal by agreement of both parties. But don’t blame the Iraqis for not accepting this agreement as is, because they didn’t have a choice - just ask them. “We may have no other choice but to renegotiate parts of this document,” one of their officials said Monday. “It will depend on how much pressure [Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri] al-Maliki is willing to put on his Shia brethren.” So just when you thought we might be kinda, sorta close to finally figuring out what has been a running debacle for six-plus years, they pull us back in…..
- Last night’s episode of Heroes was decidedly Pinehearst-centric and Petrelli-centric. Most specifically, it hinged on the return of Arthur Petrelli, father of Peter and Nathan and husband of Angela. Arthur allegedly died back in Season 1, but as we leared last week, he’s still around. However, he remained in a comatose state, bedridden inside the Pinehearst Industries building….until he met with Adam Monroe, the immortal smart aleck who Hiro Nakamura met last season in the year 1671 and dug up from being buried alive two weeks ago. Adam was captured at the Angry Skunk bar last week while with Hiro and this week was taken by bad guy Knox to see Arthur. A frantic Adam pleaded for his life, but in a telepathic conversation only he could hear, his request was denied and Arthur grabbed him and sucked the life from him. Adam withered away to a pile of dust, while Arthur returned to life and said it felt good to be back. While he made his way back to life, Claire Bennet was facing a dangerous situation that could have led to the death of her birth mother and adoptive mother. Claire went on a mission to rescue her birth mother Meredith, who last week went to see Eric Doyle, a fat, flabby man with the power to control people like puppets. At the puppet theater Doyle runs, Claire and her adoptive mother Sandra found Meredith being held captive and tried to rescue her. But when their plan to distract Doyle failed, he seized control of them as well and forced the three women to play a game of Russian roulette. Claire was forced to go first and Doyle used his power to compel her to pull the trigger on her adoptive mother. The gun didn’t go off, but it was Sandra’s turn next. Doyle forced her to pull the trigger on Claire, not knowing it was a waste of time because Claire a) can’t feel pain and b) can heal from any wound. Once Doyle’s back is turned, Claire gets back up from being shot and hits him over the head, knocking him out cold. Claire’s dad and Company hack H.R.G. shows up and takes Doyle into custody, ending the nightmare for his family. Speaking of families, Matt Parkman is trying to get started on his, following his spirit guide (the turtle he found while stranded in Africa) and coming back to JFK airport in New York, where Daphne Millbrook is waiting for him. She’s there to recruit him for Pinehearst and at the airport, as she’s about to bail out, Parkman’s father Maury, who has the same power to control minds that his son has, conjures up a vision of Linderman to talk Daphne into continuing her work. She agrees under coercion and meets Parkman as he descends the stairs to the main concourse, ironically as he is arriving to try and find her because she’s the woman he saw during his vision of the future while in Africa with future-painter Usutu (or as Hiro Nakamura calls him, Mr. African Isaac, too funny). Matt and Daphne talk and while Matt isn’t interested in Pinehearst, he tells Daphne that in the future, they are soulmates and destined to be together. She is taken aback that he knows so much about her and for now, isn’t into a relationship, but in the future, it happens somehow so wait and see on that. Back in Africa, Hiro and pal Ando are on a mission. After apparently stabbing Ando last week to earn a spot with Pinehearst, it was revealed this week that Hiro actually traveled back in time, took a collapsible sword and packets of fake blood and fake-stabbed Ando to keep his friend alive. Once he was in good with Pinehearst and given the assignment to bring Usutu back from Africa, Ando could stop playing dead and accompany his friend. In Africa, the pair had a tough time sneaking up on Usutu because he can see the future and knew they were coming. Despite traveling back in time to before he was hit with a shovel from behind by Usutu during his first attempt, Hiro couldn’t find a way to capture Usutu. Finally, Hiro and Ando agreed to go old school, hiding behind a rock and ambusing their prey after a long wait. That didn’t exactly work, but this time Hiro didn’t get knocked out and Usutu was willing to talk. He said Hiro could either take him to Pinehearst or he could go after the four villains in a painting on the wall of Usutu’s hut - Arthur and Peter Petrelli, Knox and Flint. The four are painted around the Pinehearst logo, which is an image of a double helix representing the very formula that can give ordinary people super powers and which was stolen from Hiro this season. Artuher Petrelli is willing to go a long way to accomplish his mission, though, and that includes putting his wife into a coma to stop her from being able to see the future and stop him. Peter and his brother (yes, brother as we found out two weeks ago) Sylar go to visit her after Daphne visits Level 5 and invites Sylar to join Pinehearst. He declines, but Peter reads Angela’s mind, sees Pinehearst’s logo and goes to the facility to get some answers. Unfortunately, he’s met by his father and as a shocked Peter tries to process it all, his father hugs him and in the process sucks all of Peter’s powers from his body. Peter is left powerless and ordinary for now, but his big brother Nathan isn’t in a much better spot. Nathan and lady friend Tracy Strauss visit Dr. Mohinder Suresh, who is still growing and evolving into a repulsive insect-man after trying to create a formula to give himself powers, seeking to be cured from having their own powers. Mohinder gives them a shot he claims will make it easier to help identify their genetic markers and cure them, but it really poisons them and renders them unconscious so he can do whatever freaky things he does to people now, like put them in cocoons on the wall. However, Daphne arrives to recruit Mohinder and her presence rouses Tracy, who tries to trick Mohinder by acting like she wants to befriend him but instead using her power to freeze him, then free herself from her restraints and do the same for Nathan. The two are about to escape when Mohinder recovers and throws a piece of furniture across the room at them, telling them that their business isn’t finished yet. But the review of this week’s episode is, so until next time…….
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