- This is not going to end well. Actually, that depends on your definition of ending well, but any reasonable or sensible definition of that term unfolds in a way that makes it more than impossible for Allen Iverson’s tenure with the Memphis Grizzlies to end any other way that total, unmitigated disaster. After spending almost the entire offseason unable to find a team willing to take on his bloated ego and baggage, the 10-time All-Star and former league MVP signed a one-year deal worth $3.1 million with the Grizz and will now look to prove those who say he's lost a step and is on the downside of his career wrong. It’s not often that you can sign a guy who has scored more than 23,000 points in his NBA career and isn't that far removed from being one of the NBA’s leading scorers, but The Answer is a different cat. He’s always thrived on being the hardest, toughest guy on the court and proving his critics wrong, but he’s also a too-short, shoot-first guard in a point guard’s body. He’s all about how many points he can put on the board and being a starter, not about winning. If he were about winning, he wouldn’t have gone into Operation Shutdown in Detroit last year after being traded from Denver at the start of the season. Once he arrived in Detroit and it became clear that he wasn’t going to be in the starting lineup regularly and be the leading scorer, his attitude went south faster than Paul Shore’s movies go straight to DVD. He became such a malcontent that the Pistons made up a bogus back injury and told Iverson that he wasn’t welcome around the team at the tail end of the season. That same me-first, focal-point attitude was undoubtedly at the heart of teams’ hesitance to sign him this offseason. Because of that, he has inked a one-year deal with a team coming off a 24-58 season that tied for fifth-worst in the NBA. But AI being AI, he’s taking all of this opposition to heart and looking to shut everyone up this season. "This year for me is so personal," Iverson said at his introductory news conference. "It's basically going to be my rookie season again. It hurts, but I turn the TV on, I read the paper, I listen to some of the things people say about me having the season that I had last year and me losing a step, things like that. They're trying to put me in a rocking chair already.” In a rocking chair or playing for an irrelevant, second-tier franchise like the Grizzlies, either one is basketball Siberia. The bottom line here is that Memphis is going to suck this year, AI is going to be a gunner with a terrible shooting percentage on a bad team and it’s only a matter of time before this experiment implodes and the Grizzlies find out what the Pistons discovered last year, namely that AI is no longer worth the trouble……..
- You critics and haters out there can all suck it, because I’m standing firmly beside my man Dr. Delos "Toby" Cosgrove, CEO of the Cleveland Clinic. Cosgrove pissed off a lot of FAT people when he said recently that if he could, he would choose not to hire obese people. Not that he needed to defend those wise words, but Cosgrove opened Obesity Summit 2009 at the clinic by saying his remark was intended to spur discussion. He went on to explain that obesity represents a major social, economic, and medical problem that should be given the same priority as efforts to curb tobacco use. To that end, the Cleveland Clinic stopped giving jobs to smokers two years ago. All of those are valid points but once again, T. Cosgrove, your words do not need to be defended. You are right on when you say that hiring obese people is a bad idea. First, people need to understand that obese people are not merely those who have 5-10 extra pounds on their frame or ever 20 pounds, for that matter. Obese people are the ubar-FAT individuals whose bloated physiques are a) disgusting, b) depressing to look at and c) a major drain on our health care system because of the many, many physical problems that result from obesity. These people are basically making a public proclamation to the world that they don’t give a rat’s ass about their bodies or their health and that depresses me. So of course Cosgrove doesn’t want these individuals working at his hospital, a place where PEOPLE GO WHEN TRYING TO GET HEALTHY. Who wants to show up to the hospital for anything and see orca-FAT people working there? I would have been cool with it if Cosgrove had followed through on his words, but given that
- It took five years, but Lil Jon is finally set to release "Crunk Rock," the followup to his 2004 album, "Crunk Juice." (Note: I’m detecting a theme here, namely the need work the world crunk into every album title.) Fans of poseur rappers like Lil Jon are undoubtedly pumped up and he’s (falsely) promising an amazing, mind-bending album. “This album has all the Lil Jons you've ever heard," Lil Jon declares. "From the crunk Lil Jon, to the Usher-like Lil Jon, to the electro Lil Jon who's hanging with LMFAO. I've got to touch all my fans." The album will drop Nov. 24 and the first single, "Give It All U Got," leaked online last week. If you’re doubting my claims that the album is going to be bogus and illegitimate as a hip-hop effort, know that this single was produced by Lady GaGa Sean Kingston, who have as much of an edge as lemonade, Care Bears and cupcakes. The lyrics are exactly what you’d expect from Lil Jon, namely ordering "ladies to the dance floor" and telling everyone to "drink it up, full throttle/Fiesta like there's no tomorrow." It’s a song that is clearly geared towards the clubs and it’s basically crappy electro-pop, not the Southern crunk that Lil Jon was spouting when he first came onto the scene. In spite of that, he continues to lie/insist he's still the same artist. "'Lovers and Friends' [his 2004 R&B single featuring Usher and Ludacris], that was a stretch to people," he explains. "But when they really got into the record, they were like, 'This is a hot song -- it don't matter if Jon ain't screaming and hollering.' So I think people will accept this one without any problems." Accept it? Maybe. But what they’ll also accept, if they have any musical taste at all, is that you are a poseur and a hack who has no real hip-hop cred. Mindful of that, Lil Jon plans to release an edgier single shortly after "Give It All U Got," a Drumma Boy-produced collaboration with R. Kelly that he promises will "hit so hard--it's gonna be major." The one positive in regard to this album is that "Crunk Rock" will have a total of 20 tracks, which is good because too many artists rip off fans by putting out albums with 10 tracks and less than 40 minutes of music. Sure, these songs will by and large suck, but at least you’ll get 20 of them. Other songs on “Crunk Rock” will include guest spots by Soulja Boy, 3OH3! and the Ying Yang Twins. Fans will supposedly hear a mash-up of styles throughout the album, including crunk, rock, Afro-punk and more. Can “Crunk Rock” top the success of "Crunk Juice," which has sold 2,505,000 million copies? I sincerely doubt it, not if word about this album gets out quickly and people realize what it sounds like…………
- I can see where a bank executive who oversees foreclosed properties throwing ragers and spending long summer weekends in a $12 million Malibu beach house just after it had been surrendered to her bank to satisfy debts could rub some people the wrong way. But hey, Cheronda Guyton needed a place to chill and hang, so if she wanted to (illegally) take up residence in a Malibu mansion, I say go for it. So what if a bankrupt couple had to sign the property over to Wells Fargo last spring? Dammit, this woman needed a pad in which to throw a good beach party and she took it. Real estate agent Irene Dazzan-Palmer first became curious when the couple in question signed the home over to Wells Fargo & Co. and the bank subsequently denied requests to show the house to prospective buyers. Odd, but not enough to act on. Further evidence came when residents in the gated community spotted a woman they now believe was Guyton taking up residence in the home and obtained Guyton's name from the community's guards, who had issued her a homeowner's parking pass. They also wrote down the license plate number of a 2007 Volvo sport-utility vehicle they say was parked in the home's garage and check of state motor vehicle license plates found the vehicle was registered to Guyton. Yes, rich people are paranoid and snooty, so of course these people were on high alert when an outsider was making herself at home in their little haven for the world. People like resident Phillip Roman were outraged at Guyton’s behavior and for invading their rich, spoiled corner of the world. "It's outrageous to take over a property like that, not make it available and then put someone from the bank in it," Roman said. But in this case, the rich, snotty people aren’t being totally unreasonable, not when Guyton, her husband and two children showed major kahones by frequently hosting guests at the home, including a large party the last weekend of August. Wells Fargo is refusing to comment on the matter, but I’m guessing this isn't what the bank had in mind when it signed the agreement with the prior owner that required it to keep the home -- a 3,800-square-foot, two-story structure built in the early 1990s -- off the market for a period of time. Something tells me there was no provision in the house allowing a company executive to use the house as her own personal party pad in the mean time. Nice try, though……….
No comments:
Post a Comment