- I loves me a good conspiracy scandal, and the Golden State Warriors accusing star guard Monta Ellis of lying to cover up the true cause of his ankle injury and torn ligament sustained on Aug. 21 is one of my favorites. According to multiple sources, Ellis had several cuts and abrasions on his leg - not common to injuries sustained on basketball courts - in addition to the high ankle sprain and torn deltoid ligament he suffered. Almost immediately after Ellis informed the team of his injury, the Warriors were skeptical about the explanation they received from Ellis, who told the club he got hurt working out in his native Mississippi.
He has made no public comments about the injury, but it is known that after receiving one of the biggest pay raises in NBA history, Ellis underwent ankle surgery to repair the torn ligament last week in Alabama and will likely be out of action until December. The Warriors have also declined further comment, but if Ellis is found to have sustained his injuries by taking part in non-basketball activities prohibited in his contract, Golden State could theoretically attempt to void the six-year, $66 million deal he signed on July 24. More likely are punishments that could include are a fine or suspension. The list of athletes who told lies about how they were injured is long and dubious. whether it’s then-San Francisco Giants second baseman Jeff Kent injuring his shoulder riding a motorcycle and claiming the injury happened when he fell while washing his monster truck, or Los Angeles Lakers forward Vlad Radmanovic getting injured snowboarding and telling the team it happened during a workout. Monta seems like a good guy and he’s a talented player, so for his sake I hope this is a freak injury that truly did happen on the court. Either way, gotta love it when a team accuses a player of lying and launches a secret probe to investigate his injury….
- Don’t you hate it when two stylish, effeminate, makeup-loving stars have a catifhgt on stage at an awards show. It’s such a shame when you see two musical divas like Lily Allen and the more effeminate of the two parties, Elton John, getting into a spat as the two hosted the GQ Men of the Year Awards in London Tuesday night. The argument was laced with profanities and it happened as Allen introduced a segment as a “very special point in the evening.” Ever the amateur comedian, John quipped: “What, you are going to have another drink?” For some reason, a drunken Allen didn’t find that comment funny. So in front of an audience that included Gordon Ramsay, producer Mark Ronson (brother of Lindsay Lohan’s alleged lesbian gal pal Samantha Ronson) and London mayor Boris Johnson, the 23-year-old pop star fired back, “F--- off Elton, I'm 40 years younger than you. I have my whole life ahead of me.” Right there, John could have just been the bigger person and let it go, but he decided to retaliate, saying “I could still snort you under the table.” Always something to be proud of, that you could snort more blow than someone else. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people brag about themselves or a loved one being able to do way more rails of coke than someone else….oh wait, yes I can. Zero, other than you, E. But Allen wasn’t content with allowing John to have the final low-class word. Later on, when 82-year-old Tony Bennett was presented with the night's Inspiration Award and John introduced him while pointing out his age, Allen broke in, declaring: “I'll still [have sex with] him.” Something else to be proud of, for sure. Just a word of advice, Lil: saying you’ll do something absurd and disgusting isn't impressive, it makes you look like a low-class skank with a big mouth. Not that I liked your crappy music anyhow, but now I have even less of a reason to like you…..
- Y’know, initially I had no interest in the Republican National Convention. It’s a bunch of rich, white people in fancy suits sitting around and trying to figure out how they’re going to get their aging, boring, W.-tainted presidential candidate elected. They’ll play golf, drink martinis, ride around in fancy cars, complain about the pitfalls of being in the upper tax bracket and polish their wingtip loafers (or have their hired help do it for them). But wait, what’s this? A riot outside the convention Tuesday night? Sweet! Yes, it’s true that
St. Paul police fired chemical agents and projectiles into a large crowd of protesters outside the Republican National Convention on Tuesday night. The protestors were apparently unhappy after a concert the grounds of the state Capitol they had attended ended abruptly. Sadly, the protesters were noisy but peaceful as they approached the convention. I wish they’d been belligerent as well, but thankfully they were about to get their chance. Once they arrived, a police officer read an order to disperse and when the protestors didn’t disperse within five seconds, officers along the exit route opened fire with gas and projectiles. That was just the opening salvo, as an eyewitness account had one officer stepping out of line to hit a young woman with pepper spray as she ran for the exit. The lame excuse offered by police is that they were trying to scatter protesters who they said were trying to get past security fences. Uh huh, sure. Either that or you were pissed at them and looking to flex your law enforcement muscles a bit. The kicker is that the protest was an anti-poverty march of about 2,000 people that lasted about three hours. Yeah, you really want to crack down on those anti-poverty crazes, can’t have them openly advocating that radical cause of helping poor people. And what exactly was your plan of dealing with the protest? Did you spin a Wheel O’ Judgment and use that to decide? Did the wheel land on “give them five seconds then unleash the tears gas and pepper spray”? Because in case you missed it, that’s exactly what officers did, using gas and pepper spray in the path of those attempting to comply with the disperse order. Of course, the police aren’t going to actually admit that they were in the wrong and overreacted. No, they’re going to slap people with excessive criminal charges and hope for the best. To that end, St. Paul police spokesman Thomas Walsh said Monday afternoon that some of those arrested are accused of property damage and conspiracy to riot. Walsh went on to blame a phantom group of “anarchists” who allegedly came after almost 5,000 protesters marched peacefully outside the site of the convention. Walsh characterized them as a “splinter group” of the main body of protesters who “did a disservice to those that came here to protest.” Now I could be way off here, but I suspect the cops may have been on edge because among the property damaged (which I wholeheartedly approve of) were five police cars. All told, a solid night of rioting with a dash of abuse of power, a pinch of police overreaction and a pleasant mix of protesting goodness…..
- NBA players love the hippie lettuce. Well, that’s not fair; athletes in all sports love to hit the bong. That being said, sparking up while attending the NBA’s rookie symposium where, among other things, classes on the importance of steering clear of the chronic are held, probably isn't the best idea. That didn’t stop rookies Mario Chalmers of the Miami Heat and Darrell Arthur of the Memphis Grizzlies from burning blunts in their hotel room and getting thrown out of the NBA's Rookie Transition Program on Wednesday morning. NBA officials reportedly caught them in their hotel room at Doral Arrowwood in Rye Brook, N.Y., with marijuana, according to league sources. Fellas, i have bad news for you: this isn't college any more. You opted to enter the NBA Draft, so now you have to live by the Association’s rules, which are much stricter on burning tree than the standards in college. There, you can smoke a joint at a party and because you’re a basketball star, you can probably get away with it. Heck, even if you want to do it in the NBA, do it when you’re at hoem in your own house, not in a hotel where dozens of league officials are keeping an eye on you.
Not only will your stupidity cost you$20,000 each in fines, you will begin the season on the suspended list. Ironically, the two were college teammates at the University of Kansas, so I’m guessing this isn't the first time they’ve gotten high together. Guess all of those stoner tricks for concealing the use of the hippie lettuce that potheads use in places like hotels and dorm rooms didn’t work this time around. Nothing says “ready for the NBA and the millions of dollars I’m about to get paid” like getting baked at the rookie symposium, well done guys……
- Hey hey, whaddya know, another great benefit of smoking, this one just for you ladies out there. According to a study done by Norwegian doctors and presented to the European Society of Cardiology this week, women who smoke have heart attacks more than a dozen years earlier than women who don't smoke. Women typically get heart disease later in life than men, but not in this case. For men, smokers have heart attacks about six years earlier than men who don't smoke. Think that’s not much of a difference? Allow me to introduce you to Dr. Silvia Priori. “This is not a minor difference,” said Dr. Silvia Priori, a cardiologist at the Scientific Institute in Pavia, Italy. “Women need to realize they are losing much more than men when they smoke,” she said. The study in question was done by my good friend and occasional bowling pal (Thursday night is our league night in the winter) Dr. Morten Grundtvig and colleagues from the Innlandet Hospital Trust in Lillehammer, Norway. They based their study on data from 1,784 patients admitted for a first heart attack at a hospital in Lillehammer and found that on average had their first heart attack at age 72 if they didn't smoke, and at 64 if they did. On the other hand, women in the study had their first heart attack at age 81 if they didn't smoke, but that number jumped way up to age 66 if they did. So although you can’t make definitive stances on the basis of just one study, isn't it nice to know that odds are, if you smoke and you’re a woman, you’re not only shortening your life span, upping your chances to lung cancer, emphysema, et. al, you’re also seriously increasing your chance of suffering a heart attack, awesome!
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