- In keeping with my propensity for talking about rioting and clashes with police worldwide and saluting those responsible for the social dissidence, props to my friends in Malaysia for taking to the streets en masse and violently clashing with police to protest discrimination against ethnic minority Indians in the country. In the heavily-Muslim country, clashes between minority groups such as the Indians and police are rare, but more than 10,000 Indians gathered for this rally and when police tried to put a stop to the gathering, things turned violent. Witnesses saw protestors beaten and dragged into trucks by police during the melee, but not before the cops also broke out the tear gas and water cannons. If you’re scoring at home, that’s a yes for beating, a yes for dragging, a yes for tear gas and a yes for water cannons, meaning the Malaysian police scored very high on the Citizen Abuse-O-Meter this time. But don’t worry, I’m sure that as with all police violence toward citizens everywhere in the world, this (ab)use of force was totally justified. I mean, who can show me even one instance where the cops went overboard, especially in dealing with a protest, rally or march, and used excessive force? Just as I thought…….
- If betting were legal in the United States, you’d be wise to put your money on the current Broadway strike ending long before the TV and film writers’ strike. Representatives for the union representing stagehands met with reps for theater producers Sunday to negotiate, which is a much more positive development than anything in the writers’ strike of late. The writers and networks/studios seem entrenched in their respective positions and increasingly hostile toward one another. At least with the stagehands and theater producers, there seems to be a spirit of communication and negotiation. The situation is still tricky and contentious, but with theaters heading into a third week of empty facilities and dark stages, the pressure for a resolution is mounting. Whereas the writers’ strike hasn’t fully impacted viewers yet because networks still have some new episodes filmed and not yet aired, the Broadway strike shut down most ongoing productions immediately. There are currently nine productions still running, with 26 shut down by the strike. This past weekend magnified the impact of the strike because the long Thanksgiving weekend is usually a profitable one for theaters and restaurants in the theater district. The issue continues to be the number of stagehands required to be on site for a production to go on, with the union wanting a fixed number so as many of its members can get paid as possible whether there’s work for them to do or not and the theaters wanting a flexible number so it can adapt to changing circumstances and not have unneeded stagehands on the clock with nothing to do. Right now the $20 million emergency fund the theaters set up in case of a strike is easing the pinch of no new revenue, but eventually they’re going to feel the impact if this isn’t resolved. Again, I think this strike ends much sooner than the writers’ strike, which is bad news for me and many of you because while we can’t or don’t go to many Broadway shows, nearly all of us have favorite TV shows that are going to disappear from the air without an agreement.
- When you go to prison, you hope that people on the outside keep in touch and don’t forget about you. However, most inmates hope for family and friends to stay in touch, not state law enforcement authorities prosecuting a dogfighting case against you while you sit in federal prison after you’ve plead guilty to federal crimes stemming from the same dogfighting enterprise. But that’s the communication Vick received in federal prison from a local judge in Virginia who set the trial date for Vick on state dogfighting charges that are separate from the federal crimes he plead guilty to. The state trial will take place starting on Apr. 2, when a jury of Vick’s peers (Who are his peers, by the way? Underachieving, overpaid NFL quarterbacks? Dog murderers? People who try to sneak marijuana through airport security in “designer” water bottles? Dudes who sleep with random women and give them STDs while using fake names?) will decide whether or not he’s guilty of these state charges. Vick’s lawyer requested a trial by jury, so that’s what he’ll get. Certainly he’s hoping to find 12 people dumb enough to believe that he didn’t finance and operate a dogfighting ring and murder dogs who didn’t perform well, because let’s face it, in the American judicial system you have a decent chance of finding at least a few morons who really are that dumb any time you assemble a jury. With a judge or a panel of judges, your chances aren’t nearly as good. But when you gather 12 strangers randomly to decide your fate, you have a good chance to find people who are either dumb, indifferent, biased or otherwise handicapped, so to speak, when it comes to reaching an accurate verdict. On the plus side, though, at least Vick’s chances for staying out of trouble heading into this trial are a lot better now that he’s in prison. He won't have the chance to murder any more dogs, sneak his weed through airport security in a designer water bottle or give any more unsuspecting women STDs before April. Look on the positive side of things, Mike, find the silver lining. To that end, you might actually be better off sitting in prison than being part of an increasingly abominable season for your team, the Atlanta Falcons.
- Some music fans ask themselves a question along the lines of, “What new albums coming out this week do I want to hear?” I ask the same question, but I also ask another question, namely which albums coming out in a given week do I want to make sure I stay the hell away from. There are some good criteria I use; if the album is country, polka, dance, techno or mainstream pop, I’m avoiding it like the plague. Equally important to me is avoiding any and all albums put out from anyone who has ever appeared on American Karaoke, which leads me to this week’s album to avoid. It comes courtesy of Jordin Sparks, a former winner of TV’s most unwatchable glorified karaoke contest. Sparks has a new album out titled Young and in Love, but the title is irrelevant to me because Sparks has appeared on American Karaoke and thus is a musical pariah from where I stand. The only thing worse than an album by a former AK contestant is an album by a 17-year-old former AK contestant, because then not only do the songs suck musically, they have lame teeny-bopper titles like Shy Boy and Young and in Love. I don’t need to hear a glorified karaoke singer channel her inner-Britney and warble away with a drum machine and other technological aids try to cover for the fact that she’s a total hack. So there it is, my album to avoid for the week if you’re someone who’s a fan of real, legitimate music.
- Right now, if I’m the leader of a country anywhere in the world and I’m not currently engaged in a bitter feud with Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez, I’m feeling very left out. Chavez has problems with W., he has problems with King Juan Carlos of Spain and now he has problems with Colombian President Alvaro Uribe. His issues with Uribe stem from Uribe’s decision to end the Venezuelan despot’s role in negotiating with leftist rebels in neighboring Colombia. Chavez, clearly not down with being told no or with anyone not letting him do exactly what he wants when he wants to do it, has threatened to put relations with Colombia “in the freezer.” If I knew what the frak that meant, I might have a lot more to say, but I don’t speak crazy dictator-ese. From what I can gather, I think Chavez is saying he won't have much to do with Colombia, although judging by how this whack job operates, he might actually be saying that he’s going to off Uribe and put his body in a freezer, I don’t know. What I do know is that Alvaro Uribe is my early leader in the clubhouse for Politician of the Week because he had the cahones to stand up to Hugo Chavez. Well played, Alvaro, now if I were you I’d make sure I boosted security and border defenses in my country because your neighbor is now one very pissed off dictator.
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