- The
ol’ pot brownie trick can sometimes go disastrously bad and other teams, it’s
just a rip-roaring good time involving unsuspecting co-workers act loopy while
stoned and later wonder which person whose tuna salad sandwich they stole from
the office fridge exacted revenge via ganja. It was more of the former and less
of the latter in Ellettsville, Indiana this week as
six churchgoers who were hospitalized after eating cookies given to them by a
fellow congregant following Mass later tested positive for THC. Police sent a
cookie from the batch distributed at St.
John the Apostle Church to the lab for analysis, making it the most ironic
dessert even on account of a classic munchies food for stoners containing what
makes stoners have the munchies. Highly deductive Ellettsville Deputy Chief
Tony Bowlen said that the cookies were the only common factor among those who
fell ill. Putting that knowledge together with the fact that the urine of all
those affected tested positive for cannabinoids, it seems likely that the
treats were laced with the hippie lettuce even though no definitive link has
been made between the cookies and their symptoms, which included high blood
pressure, anxiety, lethargy and paranoia. These newly minted stoners range in
age from 12 to 70 and they now have a unique, unifying experience over which to
bond for the remainder of their lives. Plus, they now know that the spirit can
move in all different ways in the house of the Lord…….
- What
is it with middling, mediocre NFL quarterbacks acting like they’re Brett Favre,
Tom Brady and Peyton Manning all rolled into one the instant their teams select
a quarterback in the first round of the NFL draft? First, Philadelphia Eagles
signal caller Sam Bradford threw a hissy fit because his team traded up I in
the draft last month to pick North Dakota State quarterback Carson Wentz,
demanding a trade rather than being willing to compete for the starting job,
although he has since shown up for offseason team activities and pretended to
be cool with everything. Now, the guy from whom the Eagles traded for him last
offseason, Los Angeles Rams veteran quarterback Nick Foles, is being a whiny
b*tch too and he looks just as bad as Bradford for refusing to attend offseason
team activities in protest of the Rams drafting a quarterback. When the Rams
selected quarterback Jared Goff in this year's draft, it clearly set off Foles,
who had one good season with the Eagles but started just nine games for the
Rams before he was benched for Case Keenum on account of throwing only seven
touchdowns with six interceptions and five fumbles during a 4-5 start. He has
not participated in a team-run training session since the Rams took Goff first
overall, but rather than hurt his own cause by staying away and giving Goff a
chance to shine, maybe he should be grateful that the Rams chipped him off a $6
million roster bonus in March as part of the two-year, $24.5 million extension
he signed last year and really hasn’t earned………
- You’re
not helping your cause, Mexico. While most of us know that the ugly, hateful
caricature of you that Republican presidential/jingoistic hopeful Donald Trump
has painted is wrong and unfair, but when those among you who are supposed to
be educated and professional are acting like total savages because someone
doesn’t side with you in a labor dispute, then it’s difficult to defend you. Enter
a dissident faction of Mexico's teachers' union
that finds itself taking extreme heat for forcefully cutting off the hair of teachers
and administrators who defied its strike. The enraged union members seized several
school workers in the southern town of Comitan, then marched their captives
through town barefoot with signs hanging around their necks saying they were
"traitors to the country." That seemed a bit extreme, but it was
merely the opening act, as the captives’ hair was forcibly cut off several of
them as a crowd watched. The unwanted haircut victims had been carrying lists
of teachers who had attended classes so they would not be fired for absenteeism
under reforms the radical faction opposes. In the wake of the head-shaving
incident, Education Secretary Aurelio Nuno says he'll work with prosecutors to
punish those responsible. Yet the leader of the faction appeared to defend the
shaming on the day of the event before doubling back the next day and hatching
a contrived conspiracy theory in which he blamed it on government-planted
infiltrators. Nice try, union head, but grasping at straws isn't making you
look any better……..
- When
“Orange Is The New Black” isn't enough, embrace women’s wrasslin’, right
“ONITB” creator Jenji Kohan? His
signature show has become a cult favorite and now, Kohan is bringing a women's
pro-wrestling comedy show to Netflix. This unique offering is inspired by ‘80s
professional women's wrestling syndicated TV series “G.L.O.W.,” which stands
for Dubbed “Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling.” It will be a comedy set in Los
Angeles and centered on the tale of an out-of-work actress who attempts to live
out her dreams in the form of a weekly series about female wrestlers. Built on
the dual pillars of big hair and body slams, it’s the byproduct of Kohan
collaborating with “Homeland” writer Liz Flahive and fellow “Orange Is The New
Black” writer Carly Mensch. Furthering the “ONITB” connection, the show’s Tara Herrmann worked as the executive producer
alongside Mensch and Kohan. Flahive and Mensch previously worked together on
the Emmy-award winning show “Nurse Jackie” and are dual show-runners here. As
for “ONITB,” it will return on June 17 in the wake of news that Netflix has
commissioned three more seasons of the show.
"We start with political agendas, the corporatization of the
prison, the stratification of people into their little mosaic groups,” Kohan
said of what the upcoming fourth season of the show will be about. If anything
is more kooky than satirizing the world of women’s prisons, taking on women’s
professional wrestling of decades gone by could set a new standard for
ridiculousness. Given that pro wrestling is already about actor/athletes taking
on fictional personas and smashing each other in the head with steel chairs,
barbed-wire-covered pieces of wood and stop signs inside the squared circle,
humorizing the subject for a comedy is definitely a fun idea…….
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