Sunday, December 14, 2014

Mumps v. NHLers, movie news and Denmark vs. all

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- Look at the Danes, getting all chesty and trying to front like they’re the real badasses of Scandinavia when everyone knows that there are no actual badasses in Scandinavia. Specifcially, Denmark is claiming that scientific data shows Greenland's continental shelf is connected to a ridge beneath the Arctic Ocean, giving it a claim to the North Pole and any potential energy resources beneath it. On the surface, making this announcement just days before Christmas is a shameless ploy to hijack Santa Claus’ workshop and all affiliated property in order to curry favor with the next generation of Danish voters, but the government of the beer-loving nation claims there is more. Foreign Minister Martin Lidegaard says Denmark will deliver a claim on Monday to a United Nations panel in New York in the hopes of swaying the group, which will eventually decide control of the area, for which Russia and Canada are also battling. According to Lindegaard and the extra vowel in his last name, Denmark is simply going to play this game above board and hope that the other nations that also have made claims in the Arctic will continue to keep to "the rules of the game." Winning rights to the pole will be difficult for any one country, given that Russia, Norway, Canada, the United States and Denmark all have areas surrounding the North Pole. Canada and Russia were the first two to enter the octagon to battle over this one, with Denmark becoming the always-loathsome third man into the fight, throwing haymakers and trying to create chaos. It’s a great idea, Denmark, now back to your point of Carlsburg………




- Bible scholars mocked it, critics tore it to shreds and movie fans were quick to denounce it. Despite the hate, “Exodus: Gods and Kings” debuted in first place this weekend, banking $24.5 million in its debut to push its top contenders aside for the earnings crown. Those contenders included “The Hunger Games: Mockingjay,” which fell one spot and relinquished the top ranking for the first time in one month of release. At $13.2 million for the frame and $277.4 million domestically through four weeks, “Hunger Games” remains a money-printing factory. “Penguins of Madagascar” likewise fell a single spot to third place, adding another $7.3 million to its coffers for a three-week domestic haul of $58.8 million. The second newcomer of the top 10 was Chris Rock’s “Top Five,” which rode serious star power to fourth place thanks to a $7.2 million debut against a relatively modest budget. “Big Hero 6” won fifth place with $6.1 million, giving the animated film $185.3 million in its sixth weekend. That kept it a step ahead of fellow sixth-week film  “Insterstellar,” which slid down on slot but added $5.5 million for a six week tally of $166.8 million. It was a colossal, four-spot free fall for “Horrible Bosses 2,” which took four steps backward to seventh place and conjured up a measly $4.6 million in just its third weekend, giving the big-name flick $43.6 million so far. “Dumb and Dumber To” hung in the top 10 at the eighth spot, bringing in $2.7 million in its fifth weekend. Ninth place went to “The Theory of Everything,” bringing in $2.5 million in nerd dollars for the frame. “Wild” ladned in 10th place thanks to a bump from expanding its release and earning $1.6 million despite showing in just 116 theaters. “Birdman” (No. 11) and Gone Gir (12th with $1,050,000) just missed out…….




- For folks who live in arguably the most delightful place in America, residents of the Sherman Oaks neighborhood in the Santa Monica Mountains, please stop b*tching. Southern California is a beautiful place and in Sherman Oaks, a cadre of narrow streets parallel the rout of the busiest urban freeway in America, even the proximity of the expressway can’t dampen the SoCal pride. Know what can? A viral new smartphone app called Waze, which has been diverting drivers from more traditional routes through the Sherman Oaks neighborhood in the name of shaving five minutes off their daily rush-hour commute. Waze has picked up momentum in recent months, but when residents of the most-affected neighborhood realizing what was happening, they are livid. Because Waze relies on user-submitted data and accuracy, local residents tried to deke the app by using it to report phony car crashes and traffic jams on their streets that would keep shortcut-seekers away. They tried and failed, as evidenced by the fact the traffic is still high and residents like Paula Hamilton are whining about not being able to walk their sweater-wearing, clutch purse-sized dogs for a safe walk in the morning. "The traffic is unbearable now. You can't even walk your dog," Hamilton said. Hamilton dwells on a winding road into the nearby mountains, but even her area hasn’t been safe. Because of the traffic, locals have seen their commute time to work quadrupled or quintupled, leaving many of them frustrated and seeking answers that the powers that be are seemingly powerless to provide…….




- The National Hockey League is full of Grade-A tough guys who keep on skating despite losing teeth during games and return to score game-winning goals after having a detached piece of their ear sewn back on between periods, but that doesn’t mean the league can evade illnesses that were supposed to be in our collective past decades ago. For proof, look no further than the Pittsburgh Penguins, where star forward Sidney Crosby has come down with the same case of mumps that has been going around the NHL like it’s a one-room schoolhouse in 1871. The Penguins announced the diagnosis, confirming that the bizarre outbreak of the mumps has now reached the league's biggest star. Diseases that off family members while playing Oregon Trail and ruin your mood after a perfectly good buffalo hunt yielding more pounds of meat than your wagon can carry generally don’t make an appearance in 21st-century sports, but here we are with an actual NFL team saying that its best player will be "monitored daily, but specialists believe he should be through the infectious period by Monday." While battling mumps, Crosby was held out of the Penguins' past two games for "precautionary reasons" so the team could confirm his diagnosis. He will miss his third straight game Monday night against Tampa Bay and all of this could trace back to Russian despot Vladimir Putin. Crosby received a booster shot against the virus before he traveled to Russia for the Winter Olympics in February and was tested a few weeks ago, receiving a clean bill of health  "It came as a bit of a surprise," team doctor Dharmesh Vyas said. "Every indication was that he was well protected against the disease." Clearly not, as the mumps outbreak of 2014 that has already touch members of the Anaheim Ducks, Minnesota Wild, New Jersey Devils and New York Rangers to ensure that it will close out 2014 with a real bang………

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