NBA tanking troubles, Charles Ramsey is back and a Nirvana faux-reunion

- The corruption is spreading and the fun is only beginning in Turkey, where the government has ordered 11 more police officers formally arrested and jailed pending trial for allegedly illegally wiretapping Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan and other officials. Turkey's state-run news agency delivered that not-so-stunning news Wednesday, when the officers were jailed and  raised the number of officers formally detained for illegal wiretaps to 31. An Istanbul court green-lit the move after the officers were among dozens policemen detained on July 22 in raids on their homes. According to the self-serving, oppressive government, the officers are associated with a moderate Islamic movement led by a U.S.-based cleric, which it accuses of attempting to topple the government. That sounds über-paranoid and it is, but the government is spinning quite a yarn this time. It has pointed the finger at the supposed movement as part of a corruption probe against four former government ministers and a series of leaked recordings suggesting corruption by Erdogan and family members. For the record, the cleric accused of being one of the masterminds for the movement, Fethullah Gulen, has denied any involvement. His innocence or guilt is of little consequence here, of course, but it does add another interesting twist to this shady story……..

- Color me stunned. Chad Channing is that guy, the one who was a part of a band that later became world famous, but only after he was long gone. Channing hit the high hats for Nirvana before they were NIRVANA, the face of what was lamely labeled the grunge movement. Channing laid down the beats in the band’s early days while Kurt Cobain and Krist Novoselic sang and strummed. Channing contributed to Nirvana's debut album “Bleach” and also laid down parts for the song “Polly” on the band's second album “Nevermind” before his departure from the band in 1990, when he gave way to Dave Grohl. Grohl is the only drummer most late comers to the grunge party think of when they think of Nirvana, but he has since moved on to frontman status for one of the biggest bands in the world. With Grohl fronting Foo Fighters and Novoselic rambling around the music scene with little constant direction, Channing was asked if he would be up for reuniting with the surviving members of his old band. He took all of five second to say that he could definitely envision playing with Grohl and Novoselic at some point in future. "Yeah, if they wanted me to. It'd maybe be something like Dave playing guitar and singing and Krist doing bass. That'd be about the only arrangement I could think of that we cold pull off,” Channing said. He insisted that he was fine with not being with Grohl and Novoselic when Nirvana were inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame with Nirvana earlier this year. "I'm fine about it actually. I've always sort of felt that for me, everything's so much more about the music than the accolades,” Channing added………

- It’s about damn time there was something worth listening to on the radio. Enter Charles Ramsey, the Cleveland man whose colorful, flat-out awesome interview with a local television station after discovering and rescuing Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus and Michelle Knight from the house where they had been imprisoned for more than a decade. Ramsey is the one who met Berry after she escaped and is credited with helping Amanda Berry kick in the front door of Ariel Castro's house. "I'm never going to get it in my head that my next door neighbor was that sinister and yet so humble. It doesn't go together," Ramsey said at the time. He then brought the interview to a screeching, epic halt when he told the reporter than he knew something was wrong when he saw Berry because any time a cute white woman is running into the arms of a black man, something is amiss. Based on a single interview, Ramsey found himself a ghost writer and penned a book sharing his story with the world while simultaneously cashing in on three yougn women having their lives ruined and their souls tortured for the rest of their existence. The book was titled “Dead Giveaway” and it dropped this spring. The book, it turns out, was merely a prelude to bigger and better things for Ramsey. He now has his own radio show and will be the newest voice on the air for the Rogue Radio Network, based in the Cleveland suburb of Strongsville. It should be an interesting show because at a minimum, it will test the limits of how far a man with a very limited repertoire and what appears to be little intellectual skill can take his 15 minutes of fame………

- The Philadelphia 76ers have a plan…and the NBA is about to take a wrecking ball to it. Of course, it’s difficult to feel bad about taking a wrecking ball to a team that is already a smoldering dumpster fire of awfulness, but even a squad that went 19-63 last season isn’t immune to having its rebuilding plans destroyed. In particular, the NBA is moving toward changes to the draft lottery system by next season in order to discourage teams such as the 76ers from taking seasons to maximize their chances at getting the top pick in the draft. Lottery-reform measures were introduced earlier this month at league meetings in Las Vegas and the league’s Board of Governors could vote changes into place as soon as its preseason meeting in October. Currently, the team with the worst record has a 25 percent chance of landing the top pick and the team with the fifth-worst record has an 8.8 percent chance of winning it. Under the new proposal, the top five or six teams would have an equal chance and therefore, less incentive to be awful on purpose. Another, more radical idea is one that would see all 14 teams have a relatively similar chance at the no. 1 pick. Because the NBA refuses to admit that tanking happens or even exists, no one from the league is going to label the proposed changes as anti-tanking measures, but that’s exactly what they are…and the 76ers’ management isn't happy. The team is in the midst of a multi-season rebuilding project and after top-five picks each of the last two seasons, the 76ers feel they need one more year of sucking and possibly earning the top pick in order to get where they want to be. It’s a bold and unapologetically insulting plan to ask fans to fiscally support a team that is broadcasting its intentions to lose for a third straight season and thankfully, it has little chance of working. Lobbying NBA commissioner Adam Silver to put off the lottery changes for another year just for one awful team is ridiculous on so many levels. What a way to honor Philadelphia’s proud basketball history………..

Colombian power problems, self-shooting UFCers and Long Island garbage racism

- Again? And again? And again? Yet another “King Kong” movie is on the way to theaters as Hollywood continues its fascination with making and remaking and remaking the franchise that began in 1933 and has spanned numerous crappy reincarnations in the past eight-plus decades. Legendary Pictures will lead the way on the latest retelling of the story and the studio has reportedly set its sights on “Attack the Block” director Joe Cornish to helm the project. If Cornish takes the assignment, he will follow in the steps of Peter Jackson, who directed the last King Kong movie in 2005 and relied heavily on the performance talents of Andy Serkis to make a movie that was equal parts regrettable and forgettable. Legendary Pictures used the recent Comic-Con convention in San Diego to launch the promotional buzz for the film, showing fans a teaser video shot from a first person point of view soaring high above dark and stormy seas towards Skull Island where King Kong rises up to his full height and roars. “Previous works have touched on the island, but staying and exploring this mysterious and dangerous place offers the opportunity to take audiences deeper inside this rich world with a style and scope that parallels other Legendary productions,” the studio said in a statement. That is some grade-A promotional B.S. right there, admitting there have been a ton of King Kong movies but saying you’ll somehow find a way to reinvent the story in a way no one else has takes some intestinal fortitude. Then again, Legendary Pictures has a habit of redoing tired sci-fi/action franchises, having done its own version of “Godzilla” a few years ago. The studio is reportedly working towards a November 2016 release date for “King Kong,” a timeline that will seem more realistic when the movie has a director………

- Garbage racism….it’s a real thing. The town of Brentwood, located on Long Island, believes it may be the target of this heinous action and Assemblyman Philip Ramos is leading the charge against it. Ramos and many residents are accusing state waste management officials of trucking garbage from the Hamptons and other east end towns to their hamlet and holding it in their town until the powers that be can figure out how to send it to a landfill out of state. The official story is that trash from certain areas has been hauled into Brentwood for months and has piled up there because of a shortage of trucks and more recently, because rail cars were diverted to New Jersey instead of Long Island. Locals have argued that their community should never have been forced to accept another community’s trash. As the garbage has piled up, residents have complained about the smell and the dust coming from the dump site. The trucking company, Elm Global Logistics, has not commented publicly on the issue and given that there isn't anything it could say that would make people feel better, that might be wise. “Keep it in the Hamptons temporarily and then send it somewhere else. This community is tired of taking it on the chin,” Ramos said. “We are prepared to engage in civil disobedience. The other day I laid down on the road right in front of the trucks together with other supporters over here of this cause.” The charges of garbage racism is being levied because Brentwood is a heavily minority community and therefore, anything that negative that happens to it can be blamed on race…or so the theory goes. Rail carrier CSX was supposed to send rail cars to ship the garbage to a Kentucky landfill, but those real cars were delayed and so the garbage continued to linger………..

- This was predictable. A UFC fighter who was just hired by the world’s biggest mixed-martial arts league won't be making his return to a UFC octagon because he was involved in a firearm-related accident in his home. UFC and weapons go together like Tapout shirts and steroids, so it makes perfect sense that UFC welterweight Joe Riggs nearly sent himself shuffling off this mortal coil when his pistol accidentally went off while he was cleaning it. According to police in Arizona, Riggs was cleaning the gun when it went off and he was hospitalized for injuries to his hand and thigh. "We were made aware that newly-signed UFC competitor Joe Riggs was involved in an unfortunate accident last night," the UFC said in an official statement. "While cleaning his permitted firearm, the gun discharged, injuring his hand and upper thigh. Riggs was transported to a nearby hospital in Arizona where is being treated by physicians. We wish Joe a speedy recovery." The self-snipering came at a decidedly inconvenient time for Riggs (40-14), who just re-signed with the UFC and was scheduled to fight Paulo Thiago at a UFC Fight Night event Sept. 13 in Brasilia, Brazil. He was last with the organization in 2006 and has since bounced around with lesser ones, including Strikeforce and Bellator MMA. His luck began what proved to be a temporary turn in November when he won the Bellator MMA reality series "Fight Master," culminating in a unanimous decision

against Mike Bronzoulis. Armed with a six-fight win streak and a shiny new pistol, he was ready to step back into a UFC octagon, but that will have to wait now that he has been removed from his scheduled bout with Thiago as the UFC searches for a replacement………

- Someone just needs to step up and take blame for a major power outage at Colombia’s main port of Buenaventura. Colombian officials are blaming rebels for the outage and rebels are denying the charges, playing their part in an annoying dance that doesn’t actually solve anyone’s problems. Adm. Pablo Romero commands the naval force based in the Pacific port and he’s the one who levied the charges that a rebel attack downed a key transmission tower. As Romero tells it, officials also believe that the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia caused a similar attack in November that knocked out power to the city for three days. Having actual proof of responsibility for either attack would be great, but so far none of that fancy proof has emerged. What no one can question is the fact that power company spokeswoman Patricia Hernandez says electricity to the city of 400,000 was lost at 8 p.m., ruining countless dinner plans and plans for a fun evening watching a badly dubbed Spanish-speaking episode or two of “Friends.” The government quickly went to work restoring power, but many residents went for an extended period of time without power. The army remained on site during the repair process to protect workers, furthering the allusion that the rebels really are out there, waiting to pounce. Colombia's government has been holding peace talks with the rebels since 2012, but the half-century-old conflict rages on and on………

Spanish corruption, robbing a WWE champ and a Simpsons-Family Guy mash-up

- Take what attention you can get and don’t complain, Kazakhstani women’s volleyball team. You may think it’s insulting that 99 percent of the fans who show up for your games are there solely to stare at the most attractive player on your team, but when you feel like you’re being treated unfairly, just step back and ask yourself a simple question: Who was paying attention to Kazakhstani women’s volleyball before Sabina Altynbekova showed up? For those who don’t know, Altynbekova has developed quite a following in her home country and on an international scale by virtue of being tall, gorgeous and clad in skin-tight outfits during matches. The attention has gone far past the point of simply gawking at Altynbekova and admiring her physical assets and the situation has reached the juncture where Altynbekova’s teammates and coaches are openly complaining that she is too attractive and has become a distraction. Kazakhstan coach Nurlan Sadikov is particularly chapped and went so far as to say that many fans don’t actually pay any attention to the actual volleyball on the court and instead show up merely to spend two hours checking out Altynbekova while ignoring everything else on the court. “It is impossible to work like this," Sadikov said. "The crowd behaves like there is only one player at the championship.” Even Altynbekova owned the fact that her presence may be taking away from the game. "I was flattered at first but it's all getting a little bit much," she said. "I want to concentrate on playing volleyball and to be famous for that, not anything else." But that’s the problem, S. No one is paying attention to you for anything but how you look………

- Homer Simpson and Peter Griffin meet at last. Two of Fox’s biggest animated stars have succeeded on the airwaves for years, helping the network lead the way when it comes to adult cartoon ratings. Sensing that it might be time to unite the two patriarchs of its most famous fictional families, Fox will air a one-off special featuring the duo on Sept. 28. A five-minute teaser for the special aired over the weekend at San Diego's Comic-Con, where fanboys and fangirls saw Homer and Peter trying to find common ground over donuts. In the clip, Peter took a bit of a shot at Homer’s hometown of Springfield, lamenting, "Don't drink the water. Everybody around here looks like they have hepatitis." Elsewhere in the episode, Stewie and Bart build a bond calling “Simpsons” favorite Moe and skateboarding, but their respective fathers simply cannot get on the same page as they have a falling out over Patriot Ale vs. Duff Beer. The tension ultimately reaches a breaking point and rather than resolve their differences amicably, they take to the streets of Springfield for a showdown along the lines of the “Anchorman” news team brawl. There is also a cameo for another Fox animated character as Bob of “Bob’s Burgers” grabs some screen time. The entire special is an exercise in cross-promotion, but that doesn’t mean fans of both shows can't enjoy the short ride………

- When burglarizing a house, it’s good to do one’s homework. For example, a would-be thief should know whose home they are attempting to rob for many reasons, not the least of which is that the house in question might belong to a World Wrestling Entertainment superstar who specializes in submission holds that work surprisingly well in non-staged settings. That lesson has officially been learned by Cesar Sosa, a man who was merely out to burgle the Phoenix, Arizona home of former WWE champion Daniel Bryan late last week. Bryan, a.k.a. Brian Danielson in real life, was returning home with his wife at the end of the day when he saw two suspects running out of a rear door. Bryan, who is currently recovering from neck surgery, was nonetheless able to pursue and catch Sosa, putting him in a rear naked chokehold until the police arrived. Because Danielson lacked a solid tag team partner, the second suspect got away. It was a disturbing incident for many reasons, not the least of which was Danielson realizing that someone had broken into the home he had moved into only 10 days earlier. He was also worried for his 2-year-old French bulldog, Josie, and said he chased Sosa about 400 feet before grabbing him and shouting some "bad words." Danielson later addressed the incident during a news conference at police headquarters. "He was very, very tired and it literally took zero effort to take him down," Bryan humbly explained. "He put up very little resistance." He added that he was "borderline ashamed" for taking matters into his own hands, but glad that nothing bad happened. Sosa was booked into jail on suspicion of one count of burglary and his arrest tidied things up well for police in regards to the outstanding felony warrant for kidnapping and burglary he already had……….

- Spain's new king is vowing transparency and an end to corruption. Spaniards can be forgiven if they don’t automatically buy into what King Felipe VI is selling. Politicians and monarchs often sweep into power with grandiose promises to clean up what the former regime f*cked up, but very few actually deliver on those promises. King Felipe has ordered the palace's accounts to be audited externally and the results made public in a thinly cloaked and totally PR-focused bid to clean up the royal family's tarnished image. The palace released a statement declaring that the king had decided on a series of measures that include plans for a new code of good conduct, a ban on immediate royal family members working in the public sector and greater control of gifts received by the royal family. It was the sort of sweeping gesture he made after being named king last month when his father, King Juan Carlos, stepped down after a four-decade reign amidst controversy and allegations of rampant corruption. When Felipe took the throne, he insisted new royal blood was needed to energize the country. New blood is an interesting euphemism for avoiding fiscal and political corruption of the sort that have plagued the palace in recent years, but coming right out and saying that you want to make sure no one from the royal family is arrested or charged with serious crimes can indeed reflect poorly on the monarchy………

Movie news, World Cup soccer whiners and Spider-Man attacks the NYPD

- What would happen if a person was able to use 100 percent of their brain? Assuming they were an über-sexy, deep-voiced movie star in a high-price blockbuster, their new film could earn $44 million and top the weekend box office in its first week of release. That was the fate of Scarlett Johansson and her new movie “Lucy,” which debuted in first place and beat out fellow newcomer “Hercules” for the top spot. Dwayne Johnson’s Greek mythology-based flick didn’t exactly open with a bang, banking $29 million domestically against the looming specter of a $100 million budget. Reigning box office champ “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes” slipped to third place, adding $16.4 million in its third weekend to push past the tipping point for profitability with $172.1 million in domestic earnings. “The Purge: Anarchy” likewise fell two spots, finishing fourth with $9.9 million in its second weekend for a running tally of $51.2 million. “Planes: Fire & Rescue” animated its way to $9.3 million for the frame and in two underwhelming weeks of work, it has churned out $35.1 million. “Sex Tape” has been similarly disappointing and managed a mere $5.9 million in its second week of release, good enough for a two-week bank roll of $26.8 million. “Transformers: Age of Extinction” slotted seventh with a $4.6 million effort and the latest Michael Bay blockbuster has amassed a total of $236.4 million in domestic earnings so far. Newcomer “And So It Goes” was eighth, making a modest $4.6 million in its debut. “Tammy” tumbled three spots to ninth place, adding $3.4 million in its fourth weekend for an overall take of $78.1 million. “A Most Wanted Man” completed the top 10 with a $2.7 million debut. “22 Jump Street” (No. 11), “How to Train Your Dragon 2” (No. 12) and “Maleficent” (No. 13) all fell out from last weekend’s top 10………

- Spider-Man has had enough….or at least some kook in a cheap Spider-Man suit reached his break point over the weekend. A panhandler dressed as the web-slinging superhero repeatedly punched a police officer in the face during a violent Times Square tussle Saturday afternoon, according to the New York Police Department. Such a confrontation may have simply been a matter of time in a tourist-clogged area of Manhattan where dozens of costume-wearing losers routinely squeeze naïve tourists for $10 to pose for a photo that isn't worth 50 cents. It was a routine day in the square until Spider-Man, a.k.a. Junior Bishop, stopped shaking down visitors and started getting belligerent. “Fives, tens, or twenties only,” he allegedly demanded. Right, because handling singles is soooo beneath a superhero imitator. When the superhero imposter started to get too loud and confrontational, an officer noticed the commotion and approached to calm things down. He asked about the outlandish photo prices and demanded that Spider-Man show some form of identification. “F*ck you! This is none of your business,” Spider-Man shouted back. At that point, it was on and the faux hero ripped off his mask. The officer figured out where the situation was heading and moved to arrest the spandex-clad ranter. Spider-Man then went berserk, throwing at least two roundhouse punches at the officer and knocking off his hat. A crowd of fellow mascots, including Elmo, Batman and a side-by-side Mickey and Minnie Mouse, looked on in horror as a female officer joined the scene and helped subdue the raging hero while tourists did exactly what tourists do in such spots: take pictures and video with their smartphones………

- Michael Bradley seems to have gotten a bit of an edge from the limited success the U.S. men’s national team has in the World Cup this summer. Bradley was a starter for the U.S. as it advanced out of the group stage of the Cup for the second time in a row – a first in its history – and upon returning to his regular gig in Major League Soccer, he is copping a bit of an attitude when it comes to the league’s officiating. Bradley, who plays for Toronto FC, lit up MLS and its referees Saturday night after Toronto FC's 2-1 loss to Sporting Kansas City, although he did couch his comments by insisting he wasn’t using poor officiating as an excuse for losing. It's by no means an excuse, it was the same for both teams, but the referee was absolutely awful," Bradley said. "The people at the MLS office in New York, when they talk about wanting to improve the league, the first thing that needs to be improved is the refereeing, bottom line. That shouldn't come across as sour grapes because that's just the reality. And it was bad for both teams and I'm sure they're sitting in their locker room saying the same thing to themselves, but they've got three points with them and that certainly makes it a little easier to swallow." The bulk of Bradley’s rage was directed at referee Ted Unkel, who issued eight yellow cards, including five to Toronto. In retrospect, Bradley would have looked more credible if Kansas City hadn't played the final 15 minutes down a man after captain and Bradley’s USMNT teammate Matt Besler got a second yellow card. Toronto manager Ryan Nelsen didn’t help calm tensions, suggesting that one missed call was so bad that “an under-12 ref can pick that one.” Stay classy, Toronto FC……….

- Would-be illegal border crashers, time to find a new source for your forged passports and resident cards for entry into the United States. Spanish police have punched a hole in the supply chain for those aiming for a black market-based entry into the U.S. by breaking up a gang suspected of selling bogus passports, arresting 14 of its members. Although the 14 individuals were arrested over the weekend in Tenerife and Madrid, the gang was allegedly comprised largely of Cuban nationals. This well-oiled outfit was allegedly composed of Cuban and Spanish nationals who charged between 1,000 and 1,500 euros ($1,340-$2,010) per forged document. The front for their operation was a travel agency used to attract potential customers, especially from among the Cuban community based in the Canary Island of Tenerife. Officers arrested 11 Cubans and three Spaniards after a lengthy investigation that began when agents learned of the existence of an organization based in Tenerife but that operated throughout the country and was dedicated to the falsification of official documents. Months of detailed investigation led them to center on Tenerife, an island located far enough from mainland Spain to give the operators of the forging ring a sense of security and allowing them to operate with relative impunity. Odds are that this bust will merely remove one shady business from the landscape and open up opportunities for others to fill its place, but it is still nice to see law enforcement giving it the ol’ college try………..

PETA vs. Detroit, teenage metal bands on the rise and Hungary v. the world

- Now that it’s clear Tiger Woods will never, ever break his record for career major titles won, Jack Nicklaus can relax, kick back…and recommend that U.S. Ryder Cup captain Tom Watson include Woods on this year’s squad. Woods, who just returned earlier this month from back surgery and barely made the cut at the British Open, is nonetheless an obvious choice for the man whose record he once seemed certain to shatter. "Oh, absolutely," Nicklaus said. "I couldn't imagine [Woods] not being on a Ryder Cup team, unless he does absolutely nothing in recovering from his game between now and then." Nicklaus happens to be the course designer for next month's PGA Championship at Valhalla in Louisville, Kentucky, as well as the Ryder Cup course at Gleneagles in Scotland, so he should have some good insights on whether Woods can have success at the Ryder Cup. However, Woods has played just twice since returning from March 31 back surgery and while he expressed his desire to be on the team following his 69th-place finish on Sunday at the British Open, a lot of guys who don’t deserve to be there would love to make the team. Watson seems inclined to pick Woods, but suggested the former No. 1 player in the world needs to show some form in his two remaining starts -- next week's WGC-Bridgestone Invitational and the PGA Championship -- before the FedEx Cup playoffs. Without top-three finishes in those tournaments, he won't qualify for the playoffs and would face a month off from PGA Tour golf before the Ryder Cup, which begins Sept. 27. "If was a captain, I would be hard-pressed. ... I don't care what he does between now and then. If Tiger wants to play, I would certainly choose him," Nicklaus said. In that case, it’s a good thing Nicklaus isn’t in charge……

- Hungary is pissed. Specifically, Prime Minister Viktor Orban is unhappy because he believes that certain civic groups financed from abroad are holding back the nation's development. Yes, a conspiracy theory accusing foreign interests of meddling in Hungarian affairs in some nefarious plot to restrict its progress. As Orban sees it, "paid political activists" in the groups are trying to obstruct efforts to increase Hungary's competitiveness. His government has taken action against these supposed troublemakers by branding their al civic groups as "leftist.” Oddly enough, this dispute involves Norway, which Hungary believes is entangled in the financing aspect of these groups through the Norway Grants program, which provides money to projects in areas such as environmental protection or social development in Hungary and other less-developed countries in the European Union. To the unbiased outsider, it would seem to be just another case of the kind, easygoing Norwegians doing what they can to help better the lives of those who share their continent, but Hungary isn't subscribing to that theory. Instead, Orban delivered his fiery speech Saturday in the Romanian town of Baile Tusnad, where most residents are ethnic Hungarians and the area even has a Hungarian name – Tusnadfurdo. The message went out live on Hungarian state radio and judging by the tone of Orban’s voice, this is a fight that won't be ending any time soon……..

- Brooklyn teenage metal band Unlocking The Truth are a hot commodity right now, having recently agreed to a record deal with Sony believed the be in excess of $1 million. The trio – comprised of 13-year-olds Malcolm Brickhouse, Alec Atkins and 12-year-old Jarad Dawkins – rose to fame after a video of them performing on the street in Times Square went viral. Brickhouse’s mother served as the unofficial director for the video as the band performed their song “Monster,” complete with passersby stopping to drop change into a collection bucket. The video has garnered more than 1 million views so far and since then, Unlocking The Truth have become the youngest group ever to perform on the main stage at Coachella and have also supported Guns N' Roses in Las Vegas and Queens of the Stone Age. With all of this working in their favor, UTT have also lined up a feature-length documentary in which they will sign their five-album deal in Los Angeles. Director Luke Meyer will helm the project and try to exploit a bunch of teenagers getting their big break in as classy a fashion as possible. "These three boys are coming of age at the exact moment their band is being introduced to the entire world. This film is a picture of that unique moment," Meyer said. According to Meyer and producer Molly Smith, the most striking part of the story was its message about being yourself and following your dreams, regardless of the hurdles one must overcome. That sounds like well-polished Hollywood bullsh*t at its finest, but that doesn’t mean the documentary can't still be interesting……….

- Life is difficult in Detroit. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals specialize in making life tougher as well, but the animal-loving kooks who refuse to eat meat, wear fur or do so much as shoot a dirty look at anything that might be classified as an animal, but in this case they’re actually looking to assist something without four legs or a beak. Of late, the cash-strapped citizens of America’s first-ever city to officially go bankrupt have seen their water shut off in increasing numbers because they simply cannot afford to pay their bills. Seeing that harsh reality hit so many, PETA took notice and is now offering to pay one month’s water bill for 10 Detroit residents – with a caveat. In order to qualify for the offer, residents must agree to go on a vegan diet for a month. PETA spokesperson Lindsay Wright explained that a member of the group has offered to pay one month’s water bill and provide a basket of healthy and cost-effective vegan food for 10 residents. “We hope that by introducing people to eating vegan for this month-long pledge that it will stick with some folks and that they’ll wind up saving on the stress of dealing with some difficult health conditions and save money on health care costs in the long run,” Wright said. “At PETA we really see this as a win-win, you know it’s going to give 10 Detroit residents in need, some immediate help, getting out from under their water bills plus it’s something that is going to be helping animals and the environment and of course there are health benefits for people who participate as well.” The good news for those who aren’t picked by PETA is that the planned water shutoffs have been suspended for about two weeks for the Detroit residents to give them time to figure out a payment plan. In the meantime, PETA can push its belief that a diet high in low-cost vegan foods such as rice, beans, lentils, and vegetables reduces one’s risk of developing obesity, heart disease, cancer, and other costly health conditions that consumers of meat and dairy products are prone to……..

Doughnut wars, Texas football felons and Fight Club 2

- Apparently you can talk about a revival of Fight Club. The 1996 movie starring Edward Norton and Brad Pitt was based on a comic book that not many people know or talk about because of the movie’s cult classic status, but creator Chuck Palahniuk is bringing back the less-heralded part of the franchise for a 10-issue comic book sequel series that will debut in May 2015. The Dark Horse series, illustrated by Cameron Stewart, will pick up Tyler Durden’s tale a decade after the ending of the original book and film. “Fight Club 2” will take place in both the future and past, with the unnamed narrator married to Marla Singer and raising their 9-year-old son Junior. Many of the characters from the first comic book will be back, as will Project Mayhem, the anarchic organization that still wields influence over the narrator as he tries to save Junior's life. Perhaps the most interesting part of the tale will be the exploration of the true origins of Tyler Durden, who turns out to be more than the narrator's embodied id. "Tyler is something that maybe has been around for centuries and is not just this aberration that's popped into his mind," Palahniuk said. What may give the sequel a different flavor is that Palahniuk admitted that his own views on the story’s central themes have changed. The first book was "such a tirade against fathers — everything I had thought my father had not done combined with everything my peers were griping about their fathers," Palahniuk added. "Now to find myself at the age that my father was when I was trashing him made me want to revisit it from the father's perspective and see if things were any better and why it repeats like that." Palahniuk explained that the narrator will have moved on from the fight club scene, but will try to revisit it and find the endeavor difficult……..

- Russia doesn’t get many things right. This is one that the Communist hellhole dwellers hit right on the button. The country’s consumer protection agency has filed a suit against international purveyor of greasy, unhealthy eats McDonald's for allegedly selling food that does not meet legal standards. And yes, there are countries that have legal standards for what fast food eateries can and cannot serve. The agency, Rospotrebnadzor, announced Friday on its website that it was bringing the suit in the wake of inspections of two of the company's restaurants in Novgorod. And yes, McDonald’s does have restaurants in Novgorod and yes, Novgorod really does exist. In its statement, the agency said some food was found with microbial contamination and several items had caloric values two to three times higher than allowed by national regulations. This feels a bit like shooting fish in a barrel, as all McDonald’s food is virtually guaranteed to have excessive calories in it if anyone actually bothers to take a look. Russia wants to take it a step further, having the sale of McDonald's products that do not meet the regulations be declared illegal. Beyond that, it’s unclear what sort of penalties the restaurants could face for their indiscretions with crappy food, but they were allegedly 70,000 rubles ($2,100). Best of all, this entire matter could be a sham, as the consumer protection agency is often alleged to initiate legal actions for political ends………

- Texas football coach Charlie Strong is swinging a big hammer and smashing anything that moves in an inappropriate way within the UT program. Here’s hoping his players get the message soon because if they don’t, the Longhorns may not have enough players left to field a team this season. Strong, in his first season after being hired away from the University of Louisville, has kicked at least six players off the team since becoming coach, in addition to suspending two Longhorns players Thursday after they were arrested for sexual assault. So far, Strong has excommunicated safety Josh Turner, running back Jalen Overstreet and defensive back Chevoski Collins for violating team rules and senior running back Joe Bergeron followed suit this week. Texas has yet to officially acknowledge any of the dismissals, but at some point it will have to address why a projected starter like Turner isn't, ya know, starting or in uniform. None of the dismissed players was an All-America candidate, which always makes it easier to get rid of them, and none of their dismissals should come as a surprise. Overstreet previously battled academic issues and was ruled ineligible last December for Texas' Valero Alamo Bowl loss to Oregon and Strong has made a point of laying downhis rules for the program and making sure those rules are followed to the letter. The first two victims of his executive hammer were fullback Chet Moss and defensive back Leroy Scott, who were kicked off the team in March for a violation of team rules. The are rumors that as many as five more Texas players could be facing dismissals due to violations of team rules and that doesn’t include receivers Kendall Sanders and Montrel Meander, who were arrested on sexual assault charges Thursday for an incident in June. Both players were suspended indefinitely by Strong and their names already have been removed from Texas' official roster, further depleting a talent base that was weak enough to get former coach Mack Brown fired and lead to Strong being brought in to return UT to the lofty perch to which the university and its fans believe they are entitled……….

- Children can be a pain in the ass. They can also let fly with some inappropriate comments they simply aren't savvy enough to know that they shouldn’t make. Four-year-old Justin Otero is an ace when it comes to opening his big-but-small mouth and allowing inappropriate words to slip out and as a result, he can no longer patronize his favorite local doughnut shop. Otero and his mother Rebecca visited the Doughnut Inn in Connecticut this week and while they were inside picking out a selection of glazed, frosted and cream-filled treats, Justin spotted another patron who caught his attention. He proceeded to ask the female patron if she was pregnant. “It looked like she was pregnant and I asked her if she was pregnant,” he said. The woman, it turned out, was not pregnant and Justin’s over-the-line query was overheard by a store manager. It seems the manager was not happy with having one of her customers rudely questioned by a young boy with a curious streak, so when Justin’s mother took him back to the store a few days later, an awkward encounter ensued. “She said ‘he’s not allowed in here.’ I looked around and was like ‘him?’ She said ‘Yeah’ and I’m like, ‘Why, what did he do?’ And she said, ‘He’s rude,’” Rebecca said. The store has since taken a lot of social media heat for its stance, but so far, ownership continues to stand by its decision and enforce a doughnut ban on a 4-year-old who will simply have to find another place to buy his fried balls of dough……….

South American tea drama, Weird Al v. Prince and former MLBers turned misogynists

- Chuck Knoblauch just air-mailed another one. The former Minnesota Twins star, who famously hit such a funk late in his career that he couldn’t make a simple throw from second base to first base, retired from baseball in 2002 after a career than spanned 12 seasons, winning the 1991 American League Rookie of the Year award and four All-Star appearances with the Twins. He was to be inducted induction into the team's Hall of Fame on Aug. 23 at Target Field, but those plans have been axed after Knoblauch was arrested Wednesday night on charges that he allegedly assaulted his ex-wife.  That news was troubling for the Twins, so much so that they immediately announced that the induction ceremony had been canceled. After hearing the news, the Twins released a statement saying their decision was made "in light of recent news reports" and after "direct communication" with Knoblauch. Assume that direct communication entails the team calling this alleged domestic abuser and informing him in no uncertain terms that they wanted nothing to do with honoring a scumbag whose idea of conflict resolution is using his fists of fury to settle matters with ladies.  Knoblauch, 46, divorced Cheri Knoblauch in 2012 and this isn't his first time being on the police blotter for going MMA on a current or former lady love. He was convicted of hitting a previous wife in 2010 and sentenced to a year of probation, so applying the term misogynist to Knoblauch doesn’t seem like a tremendous stretch at this point. Hopefully the judge is more accurate throwing the book at him than Knoblauch was at chucking the ball to first base late in his career………. 

- Technology plays a big role in society every day, especially in a busy city like Boston. That doesn’t mean every problem needs to be solved by something high-tech, as evidenced by the city’s approach to clearing open space in Hyde Park. The temptation might be to bring in a zero-turn mower and whip around a few times, mowing the foliage down to a manageable height. That is one possible solution, but it’s not the one the Boston Department of Parks and Recreation chose. When faced with an area clogged with weeds and poison ivy, parks department officials turned to a group of four-legged, shaggy and ill-tempered workers who don’t complain about lunch breaks and overtime. Yes, goats were the answer. A team of goats were brought to the park to help tame the poison ivy and other weeds on the Fairmount Greenway. “They're definitely eating the poison ivy and they’re also clearing the area. So it's like having an entire team of volunteers over here 24 hours a day,” parks department employee Chris Cook said. “When it's clear and open we'll provide some accessibility to it because this is a beautiful spot right on the Neponset River.” The plan is for the goats to work on the affected area for eight weeks and they goats will be fenced in with a solar powered electric fence and experts say that should keep wolves and coyotes away. The idea came from the Hyde Park and Roslindale Eco Team, a group of young people dedicated to providing environmentally-friendly ways to solve problems. The city used a $2,800 grant to hire the goats from a local landscaping company and thankfully, goats are unaffected by poison ivy……….

- No one ever accused Prince of having a sense of humor. “Weird” Al Yankovic confirmed as much as he promoted his new release “Mandatory Fun,” which somehow managed to top the charts and give the parody specialist the first-ever No. 1 album in his career on the U.S. charts. Yankovic, who has built an entire career off of doing spoofs of mainstream pop songs, launched his chart-topping album with parodies of Iggy Azalea's 'Fancy' ('Handy'), Lorde's 'Royals' ('Foil'), Robin Thicke's 'Blurred Lines' ('Word Crimes") and Pharrell Williams' 'Happy' ('Tacky') and all of the artists spoofed on the album gave permission to do so. "I ask permission from every artist to parody their song. Legally I don't have to but I want them to be in on the joke, not just to turn on the radio one day and be like, 'What?'" Yankovic said. However, he has had no success over the years in attempting to convince the Bizarre One to allow him to do a parody of one of his songs despite numerous attempts to do so. "I've asked Prince several times, he's the only one to turn me down,” Yankovic added. “All throughout the '80s I asked him – I had ideas for 'Kiss' and 'When Doves Cry' but his management turned me down every time. I still hold out hope – if he had another big hit of course I'd want to do my own version." The final words of that statement, subtly musing that if Prince “had another big hit” is both funny and cutting, given that the man who was once known merely by a symbol has faded from the mainstream musical consciousness and at this point is best known for bitchin’ house parties in which people are forced to dress in pajamas or be rejected entry to the festivities. Maybe Yankovic can do an ‘80s throwback album and convince Prince to reverse field and grant permission for his music to be used……..

- The sh*t just got real in South America. Uruguay's president is thirsty…thirsty for a traditional tea known as yerba mate (mah-tay). However, President Jose Mujica’s hankering for this specific type of tea is going unfulfilled because the primary source just cannot keep up with the demand. That source would be Paraguayan yerba mate, who say the president has asked for more of the traditional tea for his country and is asking them to fill the need at a lower price. That’s right, this power-hungry despot is not only demanding that a foreign country give him more of the tea he loves, but he is leaning on them to give him a sizeable discount on top of it. How far has this situation gone? Far enough that Mujica recently visited Uruguay and met with the farmers to complain about what he feels are the exorbitant prices that other regional countries charge for the commodity. Farmer Nestor Goralewski was one of those who had the misfortune to be cornered by Mujica and have to listen to his complaints that the $10 that Brazil charges for about 2 pounds (1 kilogram) of the herb makes it too expensive for most Uruguayans. As Mujica noted in his whining session, the same amount of tea is sold in Paraguay for half the price. Amazingly, begging for more tea at a cheaper price may actually work. Local growers say they have more than enough mate to satisfy Paraguayans and can increase exports to Uruguay, so perhaps this tale of South American tea lust will have itself a happy ending after all……..

HBO's drama with JJ Abrams, strippers v. the cops and Germany v. neo-Nazis

- It’s both astonishing and disturbing that there are people anywhere in the world who still espouse Nazi theology of any kind. That sort of thinking should be dead and buried like Adolf Hitler’s bunker ‘neath the streets of Berlin and yet, here we are in 2014 with authorities in the German state of Bavaria announcing that they have banned a neo-Nazi group that operated in the region. According to the state’s interior ministry,  it t banned the Free Network South group on Wednesday and accused it of pursuing the "anti-constitutional endeavors" of an organization that was banned a decade ago, the Franconian Action Front. Those words don’t make the group’s actions sound as despicable as they are, but at least these scumbags have been shot down after officials searched a property in the small town of Regnitzlosau in northern Bavaria where, the ministry said, an outfit called Final Resistance Mail Order supported the group's activities. Sadly, Bavarian authorities didn't immediately give details on the size of the group and its activities, but at a minimum, this raid and its fallout should bolster the case as Bavaria seeks a ban on Germany's biggest far-right party, the National Democratic Party. The case is a long way from being finished, but Germany's highest court is considering the case. Hearing about a bunch of neo-Nazi ass-hats who are plying their hideous and inhumane beliefs on humanity can’t do anything but help make the case that it’s time to put an end to the Nazi way of life and all of its seedy components once and for all………

- This is rare. Soccer games having their location changed on account of issues off the field is not new. However, it’s usually a league forcing teams to play in an empty stadium because the home side’s fans have exhibited a pattern of unruly and hooligan-ish behavior so severe that it’s just not safe to play a game with them in attendance. Seeing games change locations due to violent, ongoing civil wars within a country is decidedly less common, but such is the fate of Shakhtar Donetsk, a team based in the Ukrainian city of Donetsk. The region is directly in the middle of the country’s ongoing conflict and that’s a problem for some of Shakhtar Donetsk’s players. Six foreign members of the squad have refused to return to Donetsk, the main pro-Russia rebel-held city in Ukraine's east, following an international friendly in France. Alex Teixeira, Fred, Dentinho, Douglas Costa, Facundo Ferreyra and Ismaily did not fly back after the game in Lyon and made it clear their actions were based on a strong fear for their personal safety. With fighting reigniting in the Donetsk region in recent days and government forces advancing near the pro-Russian rebel-controlled regional capital, team officials have heeded the wishes of the players and temporarily changed their base of operations. For now, Shakhtar Donetsk will play home games more than 600 miles to the west in Lviv. It will reside and train in Kiev and travel to the Arena Lviv for Champions League and domestic games. Five of the six missing players are from Brazil with Ferreyra hailing from Argentina and club president Rinat Akhmetov suggested that they were using the conflict as an excuse to demand a move to a new team. Akhmetov threatened sanctions for all six if they didn’t return, insisting there was “nothing to fear” in Donetsk……….

- Strippers are in a tough place – and not just when their cocaine supply runs out, someone forgets to wipe down the filthy brass pole on stage before their performance or some lecherous businessman gets too handsy during the last show of the night. For the lovely ladies of Cheetahs Gentlemen's Club in San Diego, the tough spot in question was a locker room in the back of their establishment where they claim a squad of vice cops went over the line in an inspection of the facilities. The strippers are suing the city and claiming they were wrongly held in the locker room for hours while police snapped "nearly nude" pictures of them. According to the strippers, around a dozen body-armor clad officers stormed their club for an unannounced inspection and things went south from there. Strippers are required to carry city-issued licenses and police do have the authority to check those licenses at any time and don't have to let the club know beforehand, but this situation (allegedly) went well beyond those parameters. Dancer Brittany Murphy said the license check was less law enforcement doing its job and more of a free show for the officers, with the police snapping R-rated pictures they claimed were intended to document the girls' tattoos. "I was wearing a sheer one-piece type thing and the flashes were going and they could definitely see stuff, so that's kind of uncomfortable," Murphy said. She went on to say that many of the other girls "felt very violated” by what happened to them and considering how they make their money, that’s especially disconcerting. The strippers filed the lawsuit in San Diego Superior Court, complete with claims that they were made to "expose body" parts that were otherwise covered up so cops could photograph them while the officers made demeaning remarks. Worse still, some of the strippers were waiting to go on stage at the time. So not only did the officers allegedly break the law, but they also held up the show. Ain't nobody got time for that………..

- “Westworld” is making a comeback….and virtually no one reading those words has any ides what that means. That’s fine, because if JJ Abrams is involved, then a project automatically has some credence in the sci-fi world. Abrams has signed on to produce HBO's small screen reworking of the 70s sci-fi classic “Westworld,” with Anthony Hopkins and Evan Rachel Wood set to star in the project. The original “Westworld” was a 1973 film from then-unknown writer/director Michael Crichton (Jurassic Park), who created a truly f*cked-up world where holiday travelers could visit a themed world and interact with artificially intelligent cowboys in bar room brawls and shoot outs while satisfying their sexual desires with seductive robots. Yes, you read that last sentence correctly. At the time, the movie was hailed for its groundbreaking special effects even though it seems horrifically dated 41 years after the fact. It starred Yul Brynner as a lethal mechanized gunslinger who turns on the guests when a robot malfunction spreads like a virus through the resort leaving the holiday visitors as their prey. According to HBO, its show will be a "dark odyssey about the dawn of artificial consciousness and the future of sin" featuring Hopkins as the theme park's "complicated creative director" and Wood as the android farm girl who discovers "her entire idyllic existence is an elaborately constructed lie." James Marsden is reportedly in talks for a role in the pilot and would add more star power to a series the network is counting on to replace outgoing shows like “Boardwalk Empire” and “True Blood” in its heavy-hitting lineup……….

Brooklyn Bridge hijinks, U.S. soccer stars soar and a new, online "Simpsons" network

- Ecuador is not big on tolerance these days. Then again, tolerance has always been tough to come by in the Central American nation. The latest instance of government oppression came early this week, when prominent physician Carlos Figueroa was detained near Quito and sent to prison to serve a six-month sentence for defaming President Rafael Correa. In dealing with Third World despots, defaming typically means uttering anything other than sycophantic, effusive praise with 1 percent truth and 99 percent utter fluffy fiction, so Figueroa likely didn’t do much of anything to deserve his fate…..or did he? Figueroa, opposition congressman Clever Jimenez and his adviser Fernando Villavicencio were convicted in April of defaming Correa by accusing him of crimes against humanity in ordering the military to use force to free him from a besieged hospital during a 2010 police uprising, claims that appear to be true and yet, can never under any circumstances be uttered aloud any place Correa has jurisdiction. The arrest was confirmed on the Interior Ministry's Twitter account, as was the fact that Jimenez and Villavicencio were sentenced to 18 months in prison. The arrests will only fuel the arguments of the many human rights groups who have decried the government’s treatment of its citizens and questioned the independence of Ecuador's judiciary, accusing Correa of stacking the courts with loyalists. Arresting and pushing through convictions for those who disagree with you is rarely a good way to convince people that you’re easy going and relaxed, so Ecuadorians may want to practice restraint going forward if they want to stay free and alive………

- “The Simpsons” are the longest-running show on television and yet, that’s not the best news for the adult cartoon that spawned all other adult cartoons. No, the true good news is that fans of the show will soon be able to watch every single episode of its 25 eventful seasons on demand. Thank cable network FXX for that, as it struck a deal last year obtain the exclusive cable network rights to the series and plans to use that leverage to launch “Simpsons World,” a new way of getting on-demand Simpsons content. For the first time in this or any other universe, viewers can access every episode of the series via their computer or other networked devices. Authenticated FX subscribers will have instant access on iPhone, iPad, Xbox One, Xbox 360, Android phones and tablets, Smart TVs and other assorted set-top devices, meaning anyone with an Internet connection can not only watch entire episodes, but also search for specific quotes, curate their own personalized playlists, and share their favorite show clips and quotes. Non-subscribers will be limited to shorter clips, but can still get their fix of the show. Up til now, Simpsons content has been limited in the digital world and Hulu carries only a library of classic Simpsons clips plus the series’ eight most recent episodes. “I don’t want to over-promise, but this website can provide you with affordable health care,” executive producer Al Jean said. In addition to this revolutionary development, FXX will stage the ultimate Simpsons marathon next month, showing all 25 seasons and 522 episodes of the show in order, earning the distinction as the longest-running marathon in television history………

- Big ups to whichever hero pulled the ultimate large-scale prank in Manhattan over the weekend. The New York Police Department is flummoxed by this prank, which makes it all the better. For those who don’t know, there were two large American flags flying atop the Brooklyn Bridge. The key word there is “were,” because those flags are gonzo and in their place are two flags that have been bleached white. John Miller, Deputy Commissioner of Intelligence for the NYPD, confirmed that surveillance video shows a group of five people crossing the bridge around 3:10 a.m. From there, what happened is something of a mystery. See, approximately 15 minutes after the fivesome crossed the bridge, the lights on the nearest tower along the bridge went out. At 3:30, the light that illuminates the American flag on the tower also went out, but it wasn’t until the sun rose the next day that construction workers noticed the American flags had been replaced by white flags. Showing they don’t have much of a sense of humor, police removed the white flags just before noon from poles on the stone supports that hold cables above the bridge. According to Miller, the 20-foot by 11-foot flags were bleached American flags and a closer look revealed what appeared to be the faintest traces of strs and stripes on them. Police are still attempting to put the pieces together, but their current theory is that the vandals/heroes used what appeared to be large aluminum pans that had been affixed as covers, secured with zip ties, and that they appeared to have some climbing experience and possibly had done bridge work, perhaps even on the Brooklyn Bridge. “At this time no connection to terrorism or politics. This could be someone's art project or someone's statement. We're just not clear what that statement is," Miller said. And maybe that’s the whole point……….

- The stars of the United States’ men’s national team are cashing in on their 15 minutes of World Cup fame as best they can, be it in contracts to hawk new products, standing ovations from their loyal Major League Soccer fans upon their return to action……or getting more respect from their European Club team after scoring a goal in the world’s largest soccer tournament. For the young star who scored the lone U.S. goal in its 2-1, tournament-ending loss to Belgium, the benefits are tangible and immediate. Teenager Julian Green, who plays for perennial German Bundesliga champion Bayern Munich, is capitalizing on his strong Cup effort in the eyes of coach Pep Guardiola, who expects the American standout t to remain with the German champions for the 2014-15 season instead of being loaned out in search of more playing time. "It's never easy to be with a big club in the first [-team] squad, but he deserves to try to keep going here and play with us," Guardiola said. "I think today he's going to stay -- we're going to see in the preseason -- but I know him. He's always training well, he's a good guy and my first idea is that he's going to stay for the rest of the season." Green, who made just one appearance for Bayern's senior team last season, who was born in Tampa but grew up in Germany. Just as he made only one appearance for Bayern last season, he played in only the Belgium game at the World Cup and yet, here he is gaining traction with one of the dominant franchises in European professional soccer – once he recovers from a minor knee ailment, that is. "He will not be on the field for the next two or three days," Guardiola said. "But I hope he is fit and he can play as much as possible." The 19-year-old Green has been named to the club's squad for friendlies in Harrison, New Jersey (July 31 vs. Guadalajara), and Portland, Oregon (Aug. 6 against the MLS All-Stars) and will look to accrue the one thing he doesn’t yet have on the soccer field at the highest level – experience……….

Rick Perry gets mad, The Rock becomes a superhero and athlete-on-athlete crime

- There are three things Rick Perry knows how to do. Talk big, hate Democrats and….uh……he can't remember the third one. But it doesn’t matter because the first two things he does know how to do – and can remember – will be more than enough as long as the Texas governor follows through with his promise to deploy as many as 1,000 National Guard troops to the Texas-Mexico border after growing tied of "lip service" from the federal government. Gov. Perry laid the verbal smack down on the Obama administration on Monday, saying the National Guard will provide additional support to a state-funded border surge that is costing an additional $1.3 million a week. The area in question has been swamped in recent weeks by tens of thousands of unaccompanied children illegally entering the U.S. and while that has spawned scores of angry, anti-immigrant protests by conservatives who view the children as costly moochers regardless of their age, Perry is taking a different angle here. He said in announcing the troop surge that criminals are exploiting the situation for human and drug trafficking and therefore, it’s time for Texas to act and provide additional assistance to the more than 3,000 Border Patrol agents who currently work in the region. The National Guard units being sent to the border will roll in over the next 30 days and not surprisingly, Democrats and some Texas border sheriffs are criticizing the plan as an ill-conceived militarization. That seems harsh and not only because ill-conceived militarization contains far too many letters and syllables for Perry to possibly understand in between viewings of his favorite Yosemite Sam cartoons and barbecue rib lunches………

- This is a refreshing change. Normally, if two athletes are involved in bar fights, there are two separate incidents that police must investigate and two police blotter entries to pay attention to. This time around, St. Louis Rams linebacker Jo-Lonn Dunbar and NBA free agent Donte Greene stepped up and teamed up for an athlete-on-athlete brawl outside a Miami Beach nightclub. Essentially every athlete enjoys at least part of their offseason in Miami Beach at some point, so the fact that more of these fights don’t happen is somewhat surprising. In this case, Dunbar and Greene were arrested early Sunday outside Dream Nightclub in South Beach. According to Miami Beach Police Detective Vivian Thayer, the athletes got into a fight outside the club. Details are scarce about what happened and how it started, which will continue to be true until one athlete’s crew gets loose on social media and starts talking junk about the other side, at which point 20 different sides of the same story will emerge and hopefully a hastily snapped smartphone video will emerge to clear the matter up. Regardless of who started it, Thayer said Dunbar and Greene each face charges of battery and disorderly conduct. Both posted bond before the weekend was up and assuming neither used a gun, knife or other weapon during their scrap and no one was injured in the melee, these two testosterone-peaking pros will likely escape without any serious charges and should face a minimum of discipline from their respective league when this all clears up………

- Former Panamanian dictator Manuel Noriega is an angry, forcibly retired despot. Noriega is always irritable, but he’s particularly irked with the publishers of a popular video game that features a mission to capture him. Technically, Noriega isn't so much upset that he’s in the game in a less than flattering way as he is pissed that he’s not getting paid for it. The peeved despot has filed a lawsuit against the Activision Blizzard video game company accusing it of harming his reputation with "Call of Duty: Black Ops II."  The 80-year-old once known as one of Latin America's most powerful strongmen and someone who was convicted of drug trafficking, money laundering and killing political opponents is currently serving out a prison sentence in Panama, where he was extradited in 2011. In his lawsuit, Noriega argues that his portrayal "as a kidnapper, murderer and enemy of the state" in the 2012 video game damaged his reputation. Granted, his reputation was sh*t before, but somehow it suffered harm here and if you believe Noriega, the company used his image and name in order to make money and therefore he's entitled to a share of the profits. “Plaintiff was portrayed as an antagonist as the culprit of numerous fictional heinous crimes, creating the false impression that defendants are authorized to use plaintiff's image and likeness," the lawsuit says. According to the company,  In 2012, the company said "Call of Duty: Black Ops II" had netted more than $1 billion in sales worldwide in its first months on the market. It does include several real-life characters in Cold War scenarios, including Oliver North. However, North did his own voice over for the game and acted as an adviser, while Noriega said in his lawsuit that he wasn't consulted -- or compensated -- for the use of his likeness……….

- The Rock long ago made the official jump from former professional wrestler to bonafide movie star, but he hasn’t stopped working to draw the line between guy who delivers chair shots for a living to thespian chatting with the guy in the director’s chair. The man known as Dwayne Johnson outside the ring has hinted in recent months about a possible superhero role in the offing and now, Johnson has confirmed his involvement in a new DC Comics movie, on that appears to have him on track to star as the hero Shazam. No, he will not be acting as a cool smartphone app that helps you identify that cool song you heard at the club last night. DC Comics character Billy Batson says the word "Shazam" to transform into superhero Captain Marvel and after being created in 1939, the character was renamed Shazam in 2011 due to conflicts with Marvel Comics over their hero of the same name. In the comic books that inspired the movie, Batson is a 12-year-old boy who is granted his powers by the wizard Shazam. The name actually comes from an acronym for legendary figures Solomon, Hercules, Atlas, Zeus, Achilles and Mercury, who bestow their wisdom, strength, stamina, power, courage and speed upon Batson when he says "Shazam." In the process, he transforms into an adult with superhuman strength, speed and intellect. Johnson will make an official announcement for the basement-dwelling dorks at San Diego Comic-Con this week and sounds legitimately excited about his latest action role. "This character has the power of Superman," Johnson said. "He can throw down. Just say the word. That's all I'm going to say." Prior to becoming a hero, Johnson can be seen later this month in “Hercules” and next year in “Fast & Furious 7” and more………..

Movie news, beating pedophiles and damaging World Cup trophies

- Its earnings fell off a cliff, but “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes” retained its box office earnings title in its second weekend of release. With $36 million, “Apes” fended off a trio of newcomers and boosted its two-week domestic total to $138.9 million. “The Purge: Anarchy” debuted in second place, more than tripling its $9 million budget with $28.4 million. That pushed it past animated newcomer “Planes: Fire & Rescue,” which procured $18 million in its first weekend, well below expectations, and slotted third for the frame. The über-over-promoted and truly terrible “Sex Tape” scored a mere $15 million for a weak-ass debut that left it in fourth place and 10 spots higher than it deserved. “Transformers: Age of Extinction” tumbled three spots to fifth place and managed $10 million to raise its four-week domestic take to $227.1 million and counting. The cinematic train wreck that is “Tammy” landed in sixth place in its third weekend, banging out an additional $7.6 million for a three-week domestic bank roll of $71.2 million. “22 Jump Street” managed a seventh-place result with $4.7 million and has now more than tripled its budget with $180 million so far. Eighth place was the domain of “How to Train Your Dragon 2,” recipient of $3.8 million in earnings for the weekend and a respectable $160.6 million in six productive weeks of release. The run continued for “Maleficent,” which added $3.3 million to its soaring tally to finish ninth and has earned $228.4 million and counting. “Earth to Echo” landed the last top 10 spot with $3.2 million, giving the family-friendly flick $31.9 million thus far. “Begin Again” (No. 11), “Deliver Us From Evil” (No. 13) and “Jersey Boys” (No. 14) all fell out from last weekend’s top 10………..

- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! French youth have been told they cannot take to the streets to voice their dissent with Israel's Gaza offensive, but they don’t give a sh*t. These angry Europeans spat in the face of a ban on a protests against the offensive, setting fire to cars and garbage cans in a Paris suburb after a calm demonstration. A calm demonstration is a boring demonstration, something of which these rage-a-holics were keenly aware as they took part in Sunday's unrest in Sarcelles, north of Paris. It was the second time in two days that pro-Palestinian demonstrations turned violent, but this display of anger rose above the previous day’s level and it was uplifting if only for the reason that, like the demonstration in Paris on Saturday, had been banned to ensure peace. Banning protests to ensure peace is a bit like poking a sleeping bear with a sharp stick while covered in honey, so French officials had to know what was coming when they made their decision. The fruits of their efforts came as scores of Jewish youth, some armed with iron bars, encircled a synagogue to "protect" it. From there, other youths approached and the clash was on just hours after France honored some 13,000 Jews rounded up 72 years ago, most kept in a cycling stadium before being sent to Auschwitz. While Prime Minister Manuel Valls denounced a "new form of anti-Semitism" on the Internet and spreading among youth in working class neighborhoods, these clashes prove that a statement by an elected official isn’t silencing anyone’s ire………

- Maybe it’s time to rethink soccer trophies. In a sport where only one player on the field is allowed to use his hands, giving valuable pieces of hardware to these guys and expecting them to successfully handle them with care might be asking too much. Back in 2011, Spanish star Sergio Ramos dropped the Copa del Rey trophy while celebrating Real Madrid’s win in the Spanish Premier League, putting a healthy dent in the gilded structure. That the same happened to the trophy Germany won for curb-stomping the field in the 2014 World Cup while Die Nationalmannschaft’s players were partying it up in the aftermath of their 1-0 win over Argentina at the Maracana last week, according to DFB president Wolfgang Niersbach. According to Niersbach, a piece of the trophy "was chipped off" amid wild celebrations in Berlin to commemorate Deutschland’s fourth world title. As expected, the team was welcomed home by joyful celebrations in the capital, but as is to be expected in a nation where beer is for breakfast, lunch and dinner, the party got out of control in a hurry. “At one point, a small piece of our World Cup trophy was chipped off," Niersbach said. "But do not worry. We have specialists on the case who can fix it. We have investigated persistently who it was that damaged the trophy, but the investigation was concluded without a result." Sure thing, Wolfgang…wink, wink. The good news is that the real trophy – worth a reported $10 million – wasn’t involved in the celebration and the one that was dinged was merely a cheaper copy of the original. Next time a major soccer tournament is won, here’s hoping the champions buy some gloves with good grip before picking up their prize………

- There will never be a better reason for pummeling a man to the brink of death. An unidentified Daytona Beach, Fla. father did the only thing he could do when he came home and found someone sexually abusing his 11-year-old son…namely pummeling the pervert with every weapon with which God equipped him before stopping with his target on the verge of shuffling off this mortal coil and calling the police. According to Daytona Beach Police Chief Michael Chitwood, the father called 911 early Friday morning to report what had happened. The father told the 911 operator that he had beaten the assailant until he was "nice and knocked out" for police to apprehend. Chitwood clearly did not have a problem with the father’s actions despite assaulting someone technically being against the law. "Not as a police chief and not as a father,” Chitwood said. The identity of the victim and father were not released to protect the identity of the minor as an alleged sexual abuse victim, but this father deserves no condemnation whether anyone knows his name or not. In the 911 call, he is obviously enraged, but calmly explains the situation. He informs a Volusia County emergency dispatcher that 18-year-old Raymond Frolander was close to the family and was in the apartment while the father was out. As the father explained it, he returned home and upon seeing Frolander's face, he knew something was wrong. Those feelings were confirmed when Frolander's pants fell down to his ankles "and nothing else needed to be said" when the father saw exposed genitals. According to the charging affivadit, the 11-year-old victim told authorities that Frolander had performed oral sex on him and instructed the boy to fondle him….a sentence that is nauseating to both read and write. In a badass response to the question of what weapons he used to knock out Frolander, the father told the dispatcher, "my fist and my foot." He went on to say that Frolander was breathing, but not speaking, and at one point turned from the phone to say, "You are damn lucky, boy, that I love my God." Officers arrived to find Frolander "laying motionless on the living room floor with several knots on his face and bleeding from his mouth” and once he was released from the hospital, he was taken to the Volusia County Jail…….