Sunday, July 01, 2012

Paraguayan coups, shooting seagulls and movie news

- If you’re going to stage a coup and force your democratically elected president out of office, do it the right way, Paraguay. As a hint, the correct way to stage a coup does not involve a rushed impeachment that doesn’t give the world a chance to savor and enjoy your revolt. But that’s exactly what happened last week in the South American nation, as President Federico Lugo was removed from office in a matter of hours last week. The move has angered may inside and outside of the country and two regional groups on Friday unanimously condemned a lack of democracy in Paraguay. The groups also banned the country from regional forums until new presidential elections are held next year. However, no one has had the kahones to impose economic sanctions on Paraguay Special meetings of the trade bloc Mercosur and the political bloc Unasur, in Mendoza, Argentina, Friday, produced plenty of condemnation but no real teeth behind the anger. Many congressmen have compounded the problem by supporting it as part of a legal process enshrined in the Constitution to tackle a president “performing poorly." Unfortunately, very few seem to agree with the negative characterization of Lugo’s tenure. A diverse group of South American leaders, from Bolivia's Evo Morales to Chile's right-leaning Sebastián Piñera, condemned the impeachment. Even the always-unpredictable despotic douche bag that is Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez has vociferously condemned the events in Paraguay and now, Venezuela has been invited to joining Mercosur – the trade grouping that comprises Brazil, Argentina, Uruguay and until this week, Paraguay. Being jettisoned from Mercosur for a nation whose inclusion in the group it had blocked has to sting for Paraguay and maybe it will inspire Paraguay’s legislature to rethink its actions in expelling Lugo, a former priest and Paraguay’s first leftist leader who came to power in 2008. He was forced out last Friday within 24 hours after an impeachment trial was brought against him after the opposition-led Chamber of Deputies and Senate overwhelmingly approved the nine charges for his “poor performance of duties” as president. A standoff between police and landless peasants in Curuguaty, eastern Paraguay, two weeks ago that left 17 people dead was the breaking point for the legislature and in response, they have plunged their nation into a state of chaos…………


- Mark Wahlberg and a talking, CGI teddy bear are a bigger draw than they might seem. Wahlberg, with an assist from the über-hot Mila Kunis, won the box office earnings race with a $54.1 million debut for “Ted.” The comedy that seemed like an absurd idea (and was) bested the trashy sex appeal of male stripper flick “Magic Mike,” which debuted in second place on the strength of Matthew McConaughey, Matthew Bomer and Channing Tatum taking their shorts off repeatedly in the span of a couple hours of screen time. “Magic” made $39.1 million in its debut, besting last week’s top movie, “Brave,” which fell to third place with $34 million and has earned $131.6 million domestically in two weeks of work. The latest identical version of the same damn movie Tyler Perry has been making for a decade, “Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection,” debuted in fourth place with $26.4 million and gave the weekend’s newcomers three of the top four spots. “Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted” snagged fifth place with $11.8 million and through one month of release, its cumulative domestic total sits at $180 million. The still awful, still absurd concept that is “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” fell to sixth in its second weekend with a mere $6 million for a two-week total of $29 million. “Prometheus” claimed the seventh spot with $4.9 million and its four-week haul now stands at $119 million. The critically acclaimed “Moonlight Kingdom,” with Bruce Willis and Bill Murray leading the way, was eighth despite being in limited release. The upstart flick added $4.8 million to its coffers and has raked in $18.4 million so far despite never being in more than 900 theaters in a given weekend. “Snow White and the Huntsman” claimed ninth place and made $4.4 million to up its overall total to $146 million and counting, while “People Like Us” had an extremely disappointing debut, ranking tenth with just $4.2 million. “The Avengers” (No. 11), “MIB 3” (No. 12), “Rock of Ages” (No. 13) and the mind-numbingly bad “That's My Boy Sony” (No. 14) all landed outside the top 10 for the first time in their respective runs…….


- Boom. Literally, boom. That, or something like it, was the sound a massive asteroid likely made (allegedly) 3 million years ago when it smashed into Greenland, creating a crater 15 miles deep and nearly 370 miles wide. The asteroid, estimated to be nearly 19 miles in diameter, crashed in an area that now hosts the town of Maniitsoq on Greenland's western coastline. The massive crater dwarfs the oldest known impact crater on Earth, the Vredefort crater in South Africa, both in age and size. It was discovered by a team led by Adam Garde of the Geological Survey of Denmark and Greenland in Copenhagen, Denmark. The rocks we see today were about 25 kilometers down when the impact occurred," Garde said. The reason the crater was able to remain hidden until now is because surface changes have hidden much of the evidence of its existence and only its deepest parts remain. All the near-surface and easily recognizable features of the crater have been worn away. It took three years of intensive work by Garde and his team to unearth the mysteries of the crater and they now believe they have the necessary evidence to support their claim. They have discovered a layer of granite-like rocks that are crushed, melted and pulverized in a way that can only be explained by a sudden, massive impact. A layer of this deformed granite is spread throughout an area more than 20 miles wide and Garde believes it to be at the center of the supposed impact site. Without any known terrestrial geologic process capable of producing this sort of deformation, a ginormous asteroid is the only answer and so just like that, the issue is settled….maybe. "You might see something similar in a geologic fault zone, but not in a circle 100 kilometers across," said team member Iain McDonald of Cardiff University. Mix in the angles of cracks in the rock layers and the case seems iron-clad….to most. A few skeptics in the geological community maintain that the find indicates a massive crater, but does not definitively prove one’s existence. Even if the alleged asteroid struck Greenland, the Earth's only inhabitants were algae and cyanobacteria, so its effects wouldn’t have been cataclysmic – unless you were an algae, of course…………


- Will a defeat in his signature race at his country’s Olympic trials humble the Fastest Man in the World? Probably not, but it was still amusing to see reigning world speed champion Usain Bolt blown away out of the starting blocks and defeated in the 100-meter final in the Jamaican Olympic trials. His training partner, Yohan Blake, blasted out of the blocks on Friday night and finished in a time of 9.75 seconds to upset the world-record holder by 0.11 seconds. Blake was understandably jubilant after his win and inspired to make a run at Olympic gold in a few weeks. "Nine-point-seven-five, it's awesome," Blake said. "I won the world championship, so I've got that. Now, I'm the national champion for Jamaica, so I've got that. And now, I go into the Olympics like this." Defeating Bolt head-to-head was important even though Blake is the reigning world champion because Bolt didn't run in the 100-meter final at the world championships after being disqualified for a false start. Still, the 6-foot-5 Bolt came into the trials as the overwhelming favorite, partly because of his world record -- 9.58 seconds – and partly because Blake had never run below 9.82 in his life. The 9.75 seconds is the fastest time in the world this year and also broke the four-year-old National Stadium record, previously held by Bolt. With his own fierce nickname - "The Beast" – and his championships in tow, Blake let out a primal scream when he crossed the finish line as Bolt nonchalantly pulled up and exited the track without fanfare. There was no sign of his demonstrative "To the World" pose after the race, not on a night when he lumbered out of the blocks this time and had to make up a lot of ground just to finish second. Somewhere and some time between now and the first week of August in London, Bolt needs to find a way to get his swagger back………..


- For too long, seagulls have strutted around arrogantly in parking lots and on beaches around the world, unaccosted and free to crap on anything they wanted. That changed Thursday morning in Southgate, Mich., where the beautiful sounds of gunfire filled the air at a vacant Saturn automobile dealership. A group of Southgate police officers showed up armed and ready to exterminate the thousands of seagulls that have invaded the building. So many seagulls have taken up residence at the abandoned dealership that local law enforcement officials turned to the state government for help. "We were granted a permit from the state to use deadly force if needed to try and alleviate this problem," said Thomas Coombs, Southgate Police Public Safety Director. "We cannot take out more than 500 seagulls and we are only sacrificing some birds in hopes the rest will leave." Okay, so technically there was a limit on how many gulls the officers could blast, but it’s doubtful anyone was keeping a running count or tallying the number of dead birds afterward. The city even gave the seagulls one final warning Tuesday night, sending Department of Public Work trucks to area with plows attached in the hope of driving the birds away. Instead, the gulls scattered for a moment, then returned to their perches. "The city has only turned to taking out some of the birds as a last resort. We believe along with the state this is the most humane way to do this," Coombs said. Aside from the seagull-crap-loving kooks of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, it’s doubtful too many people would disagree. As Coombs explained, all other options had been exhausted. Loud noises and disruptions didn’t work and poisoning wasn’t an option because officials didn’t want sick seagulls to be dropping from the sky all around the city in an apocalyptic sequel to the mysterious incidents of falling birds in Arkansas the past couple of years. Solving the seagull problem might be easier if not for some local tools who have apparently been feeding the birds and thereby enticing them to stay right where they are. A new business is expected to take over the building in the next few months and it will be much easier to open up shop if the entire building isn’t caked in seagull waste………..

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