- A few weeks ago, Jack Wilson was the outspoken voice in the Pittsburgh Pirates locker room speaking out against the team’s continued practice of trading away its best players to slash payroll in favor of bringing in “promising young talent.” He was the Pirates' longest-tenured player, a veteran leader and a character guy who his teammates liked and respected. When he questioned management’s commitment to winning, the criticisms seemed on point. Now, Wilson has joined the parade out of Pittsburgh after being traded to the Seattle Mariners along with right-handed pitcher Ian Snell for shortstop Ronny Cedeno, first baseman Jeff Clement, and right-handed pitching prospects Aaron Pribanic, Brett Lorin and Nathan Adcock. Wilson is hitting .267 with four home runs and 31 RBIs, but he’s always been known more as a defensive wizard whose leadership in the clubhouse is a valuable commodity. He should be able to help the Mariners not just this season, but also in 2010, provided the team picks up his $8.4 million option for next season. So add Wilson’s name to the list of players exiting Pittsburgh this season: outfielders, Eric Hinkse, Nyjer Morgan and Nate McLouth and first baseman Adam LaRoche. If I didn’t know any better, I’d guess that the Pirates were looking to trade their entire starting lineup before this year ends so they can stock up with cheap, minor league-quality talent. Heck, Clement is the only player in this deal who will be heading to a team above the Single-A level in the Pirates’ minor league system. Pribanic, Lorin and Adcock are being assigned to Single-A teams, meaning they wont be helping the big league club win any time soon. The irony in all of this is that right now the Pirates are hanging around about 10 games below the .500 mark and could have their best season in several years……if they have enough players left by the time the front office finishes shipping away everything that isn't nailed down……..
- It only took 18 months, but technology titans Microsoft and Yahoo have finally reached an agreement to join forces and help fight the behemoth that is Google. For as long as there have been Internet search engines, Google has pretty much led the way and the Microsoft/Yahoo partnership hopes to change that reality. The 10-year deal wont merge Yahoo.com and Microsoft’s new Bing.com into one amorphous search giant, but search results on Yahoo.com will say "powered by Bing" and Yahoo will be responsible for attracting premium advertisers. Microsoft will pay Yahoo 88 percent of the revenue it gains from searches on Yahoo's sites and Microsoft will be granted the rights to integrate Yahoo's search technology into its own existing Web search platforms. Oddly enough, Yahoo is doing this deal even though it will slightly decrease its overall revenue. Yet in a true accounting oddity, it will also increase Yahoo’s operating income by about $500 million annually. If you’re wondering what this deal will mean for you, the average Internet user, there’s no need to panic. The deal wont officially close until early 2010 and U.S. users won’t start to see the change until three months later. For international users, it could take as long as two years to see the full effect. “This deal is really about scale," said Yahoo Chief Executive Carol Bartz. "By combining the ... technology of both companies, we can create a real, viable alternative for advertisers.” Like Yahoo, Microsoft expects to take short-term financial hit of "several hundreds of millions of dollars," but ultimately benefit in the long run from the ability to charge advertisers more for its service based on the increased relevance of search results. "This really is a win-win agreement both for Microsoft and for Yahoo," said Microsoft chief Steve Ballmer. "Consumers will get better products, and it will help the industry as a whole to prosper through our shared vision and shared values." One group this agreement is bad news for is search personnel at Microsoft, who could find themselves replaced by transplanted Yahoo employees in the next year or so. Still, both companies are displaying a unified front in fighting the evil giant that is Google. Ballmer believes that Google will launch an antitrust complaint against the partnership but feels that his company’s new alliance will stand up in court. I guess we’ll see how this plays out, but at least we can stop hearing about Microsoft and Yahoo bitching back and forth as they try to finalize a deal………..
- Word is that the new Tuesday caddies at Sherwood Forest Golf Course in Cedar Mountain, N.C. aren’t all that helpful in club selection, determining yardage to the green or giving you insights on the course. Of course, they also won’t give you any attitude and will never complain about the heat or how slow you’re playing. That would be because the caddies aren’t people, but rather llamas. Every Tuesday golfers can rent a llama for nine holes to carry their clubs. The llamas have been at Sherwood Forest for the past two months and their owner, Mark English, believes they could be used effectively at other local courses as well. He even claims that the llamas can give input on club selection by stomping on the ground if they agree with your club choice. English can’t claim the idea to use llamas to caddie as his own, having been inspired to follow the example of a course in Pinehurst, N.C. that has been putting the exotic animals to use as caddies for years. Renting a llama for nine holes costs $40, but the upside is that two people can share a llama. It sounds like a fun concept and assuming you don’t leave any food in your bag that the llama might want to get into, it might work. Still, I’m going the route of the budget golfer who isn't too lazy and out of shape to carry his own clubs for nine holes……..
- Courtney Love is absolute garbage. She gravy-trained Kurt Cobain and helped turn his life into a nightmare that ended far sooner than it should have. She leeched onto his rising star and sucked all of the juice she could out of it to help fuel her own insatiable appetite for fame. I seriously doubt that her own band, Hole, would have had much success at all if not for her once being married to Cobain. Having said that, isn't it ironic that Love is accusing Australian pop duo The Veronicas them of stealing her look and making "crappy" music. She did so in the place where everyone seems to vent and spew their thoughts these days, Twitter. In a largely incoherent Tweet, Love attacked one half of The Veronicas, Jess Origliasso, as an image thief.
She wrote: "Why is the blonde one from the verons or whatever they are clled wearing my actual clothes? I will do my job you kids runalong and find your own little jobs whne you can even think that you can play a rock show for 3.5 hrs call me.” In another Tweet, she posted, "The verons girls arent actually playing rock music anyone takes seriousl.” Wow…..bad spelling, terrible grammar, genuine bad blood…nice Tweet, Courtney. Not to quibble with your sound logic, but of course The Veronicas can’t play a rock show, they’re not a rock band. They’re twin sisters who make electro-pop music with very little depth or substance. Of course, that doesn’t mean they wont fight back against a past-her-prime, attention whore like Love. On their own Twitter Page, The Veronicas called Love a "jealous" attention seeker. Jess Origliasso also claimed that Love had asked to come to one of the pair's current U.S. shows just a week prior to making her critical comments on Twitter. "I guess she just wanted my attention by writing s---. She is madly in love with Azaria (Byrne) and she's very jealous I'm dating him," Jess said. “All I really wanted to say to her was: 'Come on Courtney, cut all the bulls--- and release another record already. I loved your music and I know you've got it in you," she said. Love clearly didn’t like Jess’ comments because she had deleted them from her Twitter page the day after they were posted. This is one of those battles where I don’t like either party and would prefer that both just shut up and go away, so here’s hoping…….
- Boy, I cannot tell you how much of a relief it is to know that the current regime in Iran not only brutally abuses its power and assaults its citizens in the street when they dare to stand up against it, but it consistently applies that same treatment once those brave citizens are wrongfully imprisoned. Those claims come from prisoners who say they watched fellow detainees being beaten to death by guards in overcrowded, foul-smelling holding pens. Other claims of abuse include the ripping off of fingernails, being forced to licked disgustingly filthy toilet bowls and that sort of heinous abuse. Families have been given the bruised, battered remains of their loved ones and left to wonder just what happened to them before they were killed. The government is trying to smooth things over with hollow gestures like releasing 140 prisoners on Tuesday and hoping everyone would see that and simply gloss over the fact that more than 100 protesters have died since the country’s rigged presidential election. President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad issued a letter urging the head of the judiciary to show “Islamic mercy” to the detainees and of course he did so in very public fashion so as to make himself appear as magnanimous as possible. Backing him up was the head of Iran’s Supreme Administrative Court, Ayatollah Ghorbanali Dorri-Najafabadi, who said more prisoners would be released by the end of the week and promised that a “serious judicial inquiry” was being conducted into the deaths that have occurred in prisons since the June 12 election. Riiiiight. I’m sure that inquiry will be very thorough and in no way a total sham with no hope of ever revealing what truly happened. This is an overt public relations play by the Iranian government and no more, period. Oh, and just as this is a PR ploy for the government, the claim that only 150-250 of the more than 2,500 people arrested in the post-election crackdown remain in prison is a complete lie. If the number is anywhere near that close it’s because so many prisoners have been killed, er, um, died of natural causes while in captivity. Hospitals reporting the receipt of bodies of dead protestors dispute the numbers the government is putting out on how many deaths have occurred from the protests alone, so it’s not a stretch to imagine that the government is lying about the number of people still in prison too. But hey, at least Ahmadinejad and his crew are consistent….consistently abusive and dictatorial, but consistent nonetheless…….
Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Tanning beds = early death, the Hulkster's nightmare ends and P. Burress' nightmare just beginning
- With a rampaging district attorney baring down on him, Plaxico Burress took a step to fight back yesterday and we’ll have to wait and see if that was a smart play. Burress, a.k.a. Harris Smith (the fake name he gave to an ER doctor when seeking treatment for the bullet wound he put in his own leg), testified testify before a Manhattan grand jury at 10 a.m. yesterday at the urging of his attorney, Benjamin Brafman. Brafman believes that it’s important for the jury to hear Burress’ side of carrying a gun for which he had no license into a public place and being so reckless with it that he shot himself in the thigh. Good call, counselor. "There are many mitigating circumstances in this case," Brafman said. "First, the gun was not used in the commission of a crime. The only victim here was Plaxico Burress. And the gun was registered in the state of Florida, which has reciprocating registration agreements in 32 states. My client was under the impression that the same was the case in the city of New York." A few problems with those assertions, counselor. First, carrying the gun without a permit was the crime and discharging it in a public place was also illegal. Second, it doesn’t matter one damn bit how ill-informed your client was about reciprocating registration agreements and whether he was legally allowed to carry his gun in New York. If you’re going to go to a club strapped, it’s completely on you to know what the law is ans whether your permit to carry is valid in that state. Not knowing what the law is does not excuse you from breaking it, a-hole. I’m not one to side with The Man and the law, but Manhattan District Attorney Robert Morgenthau simply has a much better case than Burress. Brafman isn't helping with his act, uttering a nonstop flow of nonsense that is making his client look worse, not better. For example (as if you needed another one), Brafman characterized Burress’ actions as "a lapse in judgment.” Let’s all go ahead and agree that any action which results in a bullet hole being put in a human being is not a lapse in judgment. A lapse in judgment is thinking it’s a good idea to jump off the roof of the garage into the swimming pool and breaking your arm in the fall. A person knowingly carrying a loaded gun into a crowded club and not exercising caution in handling that gun is much more than a lapse in judgment. Speaking of judgment, Burress is showing very poor judgment in the way he and his attorney are handling this case. According to previous reports, Burress was willing to agree to spend a year in jail for shooting himself with an unlicensed gun early on the morning of Nov. 29, but when prosecutors insisted on two, Burress balked. "We've always taken the position that he's going to have to go to jail, whether by trial or by plea," Morgenthau said. For the record, Burress is charged with criminal possession of a weapon and faces up to 3½ years in prison. He has pleaded not guilty and is free on bail, but that doesn’t mean he has a shot of playing in the NFL this season. Should the grand jury indict him, there’s a chance that NFL commissioner Roger Goodell could suspend Burress before he even has his trial. No team wants to bring in a headache like that, especially if Burress could be heading to jail soon. As always, the lesson to be learned is that if you feel like you need a gun to go somewhere, then it’s a place you probably shouldn’t be going to begin with……
- Things are turning nasty in South America and that should shock exactly no one. That Venezuela and Colombia are sniping at one another is a given; it’s merely a question of what the current showdown is over. I’d say that shoulder-launched anti-tank weapons purchased by Venezuela allegedly ending up in the hands of guerrillas is a good reason to go and Colombian Vice President Francisco Santos seems to concur. In a radio interview Monday, Santos talked about weapons seized from members of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC, being traced to Venezuela. “This is not the first time that this happens," Santos said. "In several operations in which we have recovered weapons from the FARC, we have found powerful munitions and powerful equipment, including anti-tank weapons, from a country that sold them to Venezuela and that turned up in the hands of the FARC.” A pretty powerful accusation, basically implying that one of your neighboring countries is supplying weapons to guerrilla fighters. So what are these weapons, you ask? Apparently the weapons are AT4 shoulder-fired rockets manufactured by Saab Bofors Dynamics. I’m no weapons expert, but shoulder-fired rockets sound like a pretty dangerous weapon. Anything with the work rocket in it sounds like a dangerous weapon, actually. The rockets were seized in 2008 from a guerrilla base, but Venezuela is doing its best to distance itself from any allegations that the weapons came from within its border. "To me it seems that this is a new attack against our government based on lies," Venezuelan Minister of the Interior and Justice Tareck El Aissami said. "We absolutely deny that our government or our institutions are providing assistance to criminal and terrorist organizations. It's laughable, it sounds like a cheap film made by the American government." I’m sorry, but what the heck was that? The United States isn't involved in this little skirmish of yours, so quit sucker-punching us while we stand on the sidelines. I know you hate the U.S., but that doesn’t mean we’re involved in every bad thing that happens to Venezuela. If you want to (almost certainly) lie and say that you didn’t give these weapons to this guerrilla group, that’s fine. Just know that a) it’s not the first time these accusations have been levied against you and b) no one actually believes you. Other than that, keep up the good work……..
- Hopefully this will end Hulk Hogan’s inclinations to channel his inner O.J. Simpson. The Hulkster made those comments about “totally getting” how O.J. must have felt seeing his ex-wife tooling around town with a newer, younger guy and subsequently turning both of them into human Pez dispensers a few months ago as divorce proceedings with his ex-wife Linda Bollea dragged on. While watching her live in the home he built and paid for with her new 19-year-old boyfriend, Hogan was understandably upset. Now, the couple has reached a divorce settlement and all of this can hopefully go away. The announcement was made by the couple's attorneys at a court hearing in Clearwater Tuesday morning. The judge in the case was notified of the agreement Monday night and everything was outlined in court the next day. “We've reached a marital settlement agreement," Ray Rafool, Linda's attorney, told the judge. Amazingly, both the Hulkster and Linda Bollea were seen smiling before the proceedings began and at one point, she even kissed his cheek. Now maybe that was just for show and was a hollow gesture, but at least they weren’t at each other’s throats. After the scene that unfolded at a hearing last month, when Hulk Hogan challenged the way Linda spends the $40,000 in alimony she receives every month, things turned very ugly. The Hulkster’s attorney called in Tracy Morgan, the couple's hair stylist, as a witness and she tore into Linda Bollea. "The client does a lot of drugs and is an alcoholic. She doesn't have a good relationship with her daughter, with her son, and she's wasting a fortune," Morgan said of Linda Bollea. In turn, Bollea’s attorneys attacked Morgan’s testimony and insisted that “Linda never did trust her.” Now this entire soap opera is over and although terms of the agreement weren’t immediately known, one thing is for sure and Linda Bollea said it best following Tuesday’s hearing: “The war is over.” It is over and not a moment too soon……..
- With 2009 being such a Debbie Downer year economically for the United States, who couldn’t use a boost in 2010? We could all use that boost…..it’s just not coming. As bad as 2009 has been, many analysts and observers predict that 2010 will be even worse. “The numbers that states are looking at in terms of their shortfalls is truly staggering. And all of this is happening in an environment where raising taxes is still pretty toxic, and it's pretty explosive," said Sujit CanagaRetna, a senior fiscal analyst for the Council of State Governments. Since they aren’t hiking income and property taxes, states are instead targeting specific items and services with taxes and fees in the hopes of lessening the deficiencies in their budgets. You may recall that a few days ago I detailed the push to legalize marijuana in the state of California in the hopes that the tax revenues from the hippie lettuce would help dig the state out of the red. by Democratic State Assemblyman Tom Ammiano is leading that charge on the legislative side with a bill proposing taxing pot by $50 per ounce. If the state legislators in California have the good sense to get behind this proposal, it could bring in an estimated $1 billion a year in state taxes. Of course, taxing the chronic is not an acceptable option everywhere in the country and each state has to stick with what it knows best. In Georgia, that means strip clubs. Republican state Sen. Jack Murphy proposed a "pole tax" would have charged patrons of strip clubs a $5 entrance fee. It’s a bill I could get behind because I am of the firm belief that anyone who patronizes a strip club is a bonafide loser and deserves whatever sort of taxation that can be put on them. However, Murphy’s bill was not approved and now Georgia must look elsewhere for financial answers. For 19 other states, gambling-related proposals have been the option of choice as they look for ways balance their 2010 budgets. In Alabama, that means lawmakers considering bringing more bingo games to their state and legalizing. But like the strip club measure in Georgia, it too was defeated. The most publicized measure by far has been in Delaware, with Gov. Jack Markell signing legislation creating a sports lottery that legalizes single-game betting. That has resulted in no less than four professional sports leagues and the NCAA filing a lawsuit over plans for the lottery. Other interesting financial measures across the country include: Wisconsin Gov. Jim Doyle's 2010 budget tripling the price of an elk hunting license, even though his state has no elk hunting season, New York Gov. David Paterson proposing a "fat tax" that would to add an 18-percent tax on sugary beverages, New Jersey residents being subjected to a sales tax on health club memberships and state legislators in Virginia voting to increase inmates' daily rent by 500 percent, from $1 to $5, a measure that Gov. Tim Kaine vetoed. So what is your state doing to make ends meet? Odds are it’s wacky, it’s whimsical…..and it won’t work………
- Vanity has a price and for the vain, self-absorbed idiots who willingly jam themselves into tanning beds on a regular basis lest they look like anything other than a person who has just spent two months living at the Equator, that price is a drastically increased chance for skin cancer. Not only an increased chance of skin cancer, but a risk on par with those posed by horrific products like cigarettes and asbestos. That’s according to a study done by the International Agency for Research on Cancer (IARC), which had previously classified sunbeds as being a "probable" cause of cancer. When it dug a little deeper and did more research, the agency became convinced that tanning machines should be moved to "the highest cancer risk category" and be labeled as "carcinogenic to humans.” I’m not a doctor and I don’t even like playing one here, but that sounds bad – really bad. When something is considered carcinogenic, I’m going the other direction. But it makes sense, right? Spending too much time in the sun over the years is bad for your skin, so how much worse is it to drop into a compact box that basically puts you in direct contact with simulated sun and stay there for prolonged periods of time? Good move! It’s absolutely worth it to get that nice, orange glow for the prom or that wedding you’re the maid of honor for! Never mind the research the IARC based its findings on which declares that the risk of melanoma -- the most deadly form of skin cancer -- was increased by 75 per cent in people who started using sunbeds regularly before the age of 30. No way that happens to you, right? Besides, is that all the IARC has? Actually, it’s not. The agency also says there is evidence of a link between eye cancer and the use of sunbeds. Add all of this up and it’s just not that surprising that melanoma is the second most common cancer in women aged 20 - 29.5, according to the America Melanoma Foundation. So the next time you just have to get tan for an event or to impress someone, take a moment to think back over what we just talked about and ask yourself if you’d like to head to an early grave following a painful, agonizing battle with skin cancer just so you can look a little better for your dance, wedding, etc…………
- Things are turning nasty in South America and that should shock exactly no one. That Venezuela and Colombia are sniping at one another is a given; it’s merely a question of what the current showdown is over. I’d say that shoulder-launched anti-tank weapons purchased by Venezuela allegedly ending up in the hands of guerrillas is a good reason to go and Colombian Vice President Francisco Santos seems to concur. In a radio interview Monday, Santos talked about weapons seized from members of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC, being traced to Venezuela. “This is not the first time that this happens," Santos said. "In several operations in which we have recovered weapons from the FARC, we have found powerful munitions and powerful equipment, including anti-tank weapons, from a country that sold them to Venezuela and that turned up in the hands of the FARC.” A pretty powerful accusation, basically implying that one of your neighboring countries is supplying weapons to guerrilla fighters. So what are these weapons, you ask? Apparently the weapons are AT4 shoulder-fired rockets manufactured by Saab Bofors Dynamics. I’m no weapons expert, but shoulder-fired rockets sound like a pretty dangerous weapon. Anything with the work rocket in it sounds like a dangerous weapon, actually. The rockets were seized in 2008 from a guerrilla base, but Venezuela is doing its best to distance itself from any allegations that the weapons came from within its border. "To me it seems that this is a new attack against our government based on lies," Venezuelan Minister of the Interior and Justice Tareck El Aissami said. "We absolutely deny that our government or our institutions are providing assistance to criminal and terrorist organizations. It's laughable, it sounds like a cheap film made by the American government." I’m sorry, but what the heck was that? The United States isn't involved in this little skirmish of yours, so quit sucker-punching us while we stand on the sidelines. I know you hate the U.S., but that doesn’t mean we’re involved in every bad thing that happens to Venezuela. If you want to (almost certainly) lie and say that you didn’t give these weapons to this guerrilla group, that’s fine. Just know that a) it’s not the first time these accusations have been levied against you and b) no one actually believes you. Other than that, keep up the good work……..
- Hopefully this will end Hulk Hogan’s inclinations to channel his inner O.J. Simpson. The Hulkster made those comments about “totally getting” how O.J. must have felt seeing his ex-wife tooling around town with a newer, younger guy and subsequently turning both of them into human Pez dispensers a few months ago as divorce proceedings with his ex-wife Linda Bollea dragged on. While watching her live in the home he built and paid for with her new 19-year-old boyfriend, Hogan was understandably upset. Now, the couple has reached a divorce settlement and all of this can hopefully go away. The announcement was made by the couple's attorneys at a court hearing in Clearwater Tuesday morning. The judge in the case was notified of the agreement Monday night and everything was outlined in court the next day. “We've reached a marital settlement agreement," Ray Rafool, Linda's attorney, told the judge. Amazingly, both the Hulkster and Linda Bollea were seen smiling before the proceedings began and at one point, she even kissed his cheek. Now maybe that was just for show and was a hollow gesture, but at least they weren’t at each other’s throats. After the scene that unfolded at a hearing last month, when Hulk Hogan challenged the way Linda spends the $40,000 in alimony she receives every month, things turned very ugly. The Hulkster’s attorney called in Tracy Morgan, the couple's hair stylist, as a witness and she tore into Linda Bollea. "The client does a lot of drugs and is an alcoholic. She doesn't have a good relationship with her daughter, with her son, and she's wasting a fortune," Morgan said of Linda Bollea. In turn, Bollea’s attorneys attacked Morgan’s testimony and insisted that “Linda never did trust her.” Now this entire soap opera is over and although terms of the agreement weren’t immediately known, one thing is for sure and Linda Bollea said it best following Tuesday’s hearing: “The war is over.” It is over and not a moment too soon……..
- With 2009 being such a Debbie Downer year economically for the United States, who couldn’t use a boost in 2010? We could all use that boost…..it’s just not coming. As bad as 2009 has been, many analysts and observers predict that 2010 will be even worse. “The numbers that states are looking at in terms of their shortfalls is truly staggering. And all of this is happening in an environment where raising taxes is still pretty toxic, and it's pretty explosive," said Sujit CanagaRetna, a senior fiscal analyst for the Council of State Governments. Since they aren’t hiking income and property taxes, states are instead targeting specific items and services with taxes and fees in the hopes of lessening the deficiencies in their budgets. You may recall that a few days ago I detailed the push to legalize marijuana in the state of California in the hopes that the tax revenues from the hippie lettuce would help dig the state out of the red. by Democratic State Assemblyman Tom Ammiano is leading that charge on the legislative side with a bill proposing taxing pot by $50 per ounce. If the state legislators in California have the good sense to get behind this proposal, it could bring in an estimated $1 billion a year in state taxes. Of course, taxing the chronic is not an acceptable option everywhere in the country and each state has to stick with what it knows best. In Georgia, that means strip clubs. Republican state Sen. Jack Murphy proposed a "pole tax" would have charged patrons of strip clubs a $5 entrance fee. It’s a bill I could get behind because I am of the firm belief that anyone who patronizes a strip club is a bonafide loser and deserves whatever sort of taxation that can be put on them. However, Murphy’s bill was not approved and now Georgia must look elsewhere for financial answers. For 19 other states, gambling-related proposals have been the option of choice as they look for ways balance their 2010 budgets. In Alabama, that means lawmakers considering bringing more bingo games to their state and legalizing. But like the strip club measure in Georgia, it too was defeated. The most publicized measure by far has been in Delaware, with Gov. Jack Markell signing legislation creating a sports lottery that legalizes single-game betting. That has resulted in no less than four professional sports leagues and the NCAA filing a lawsuit over plans for the lottery. Other interesting financial measures across the country include: Wisconsin Gov. Jim Doyle's 2010 budget tripling the price of an elk hunting license, even though his state has no elk hunting season, New York Gov. David Paterson proposing a "fat tax" that would to add an 18-percent tax on sugary beverages, New Jersey residents being subjected to a sales tax on health club memberships and state legislators in Virginia voting to increase inmates' daily rent by 500 percent, from $1 to $5, a measure that Gov. Tim Kaine vetoed. So what is your state doing to make ends meet? Odds are it’s wacky, it’s whimsical…..and it won’t work………
- Vanity has a price and for the vain, self-absorbed idiots who willingly jam themselves into tanning beds on a regular basis lest they look like anything other than a person who has just spent two months living at the Equator, that price is a drastically increased chance for skin cancer. Not only an increased chance of skin cancer, but a risk on par with those posed by horrific products like cigarettes and asbestos. That’s according to a study done by the International Agency for Research on Cancer (IARC), which had previously classified sunbeds as being a "probable" cause of cancer. When it dug a little deeper and did more research, the agency became convinced that tanning machines should be moved to "the highest cancer risk category" and be labeled as "carcinogenic to humans.” I’m not a doctor and I don’t even like playing one here, but that sounds bad – really bad. When something is considered carcinogenic, I’m going the other direction. But it makes sense, right? Spending too much time in the sun over the years is bad for your skin, so how much worse is it to drop into a compact box that basically puts you in direct contact with simulated sun and stay there for prolonged periods of time? Good move! It’s absolutely worth it to get that nice, orange glow for the prom or that wedding you’re the maid of honor for! Never mind the research the IARC based its findings on which declares that the risk of melanoma -- the most deadly form of skin cancer -- was increased by 75 per cent in people who started using sunbeds regularly before the age of 30. No way that happens to you, right? Besides, is that all the IARC has? Actually, it’s not. The agency also says there is evidence of a link between eye cancer and the use of sunbeds. Add all of this up and it’s just not that surprising that melanoma is the second most common cancer in women aged 20 - 29.5, according to the America Melanoma Foundation. So the next time you just have to get tan for an event or to impress someone, take a moment to think back over what we just talked about and ask yourself if you’d like to head to an early grave following a painful, agonizing battle with skin cancer just so you can look a little better for your dance, wedding, etc…………
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Goats v. poison ivy, an IHOP celebrity break-up and the scariest dude in the world resides in Nevada
- I may have found the scariest man in the world and it probably isn't surprising to learn that this man resides in the American penitentiary system. Prison is where the scariest of the scary reside, locked up far away from the rest of society so as to remove them as potential threats to the law-abiding segment of that society. However, there is definitely an element of this man’s story that is stunning and it comes from the reason why I believe he’s the scariest dude in the world. This man is a prisoner in Nevada and he is the cellmate of none other than Orenthal James Simpson. Yes, dude is the cellie for O.J., the man who turned his wife and her friend into human Pez dispensers and got away with it only to end up in the hole for an attempted robbery and kidnapping in Las Vegas. After being sent away for that conviction, the Juice landed in a Nevada jail cell with a man he is absolutely terrified of – seriously. The guy who committed an extremely brutal and public double murder and then had the audacity to storm a Vegas hotel room with an armored posse while out on that free pass from murdering people is scared of a fellow prisoner. It’s being reported that the Juice has told friends and family that he is scared to death of his cellmate because the man has threatened to kill him because O.J. got away with murder and that cellmate is behind bars for murdering someone. Sharing a cell with a guy who skated on the same charge that got you locked up would be pretty infuriating, especially for a prison inmate. These are guys with notoriously short fuses; they wouldn’t be in prison if they were calm, rational, level-headed guys with loads of patience and understanding. So I’d imagine that having an angry cellie with an eye for offing you would be pretty frightening. After all, you’re sharing a confined space with them for the majority of every day and sleeping in that confined space with them at night. All of that being said, how terrifying do you have to be to scare O.J. freaking Simpson? He’s the worst guy ever, a dude who seemed to have a deal with the devil that allowed him to go Teflon and avoid the ramiprecussions of any crime or misdeed – until that Vegas incident. If you can scare a guy who scares the crap out of the rest of us that badly, you have to be the baddest man walking the face of this or any other planet……..
- Keep shoveling those M&Ms into your FAT faces, America! Well, keep eating the blue M&M’s; the rest of them you can do without. Why the blue ones? Well, according to a new study conducted by researchers at the University of Rochester Medical Center, injecting the compound Brilliant Blue G (BBG), i.e. the same blue food dye found in M&Ms and Gatorade, into rats suffering spinal cord injuries allowed the rodents to walk again, albeit with a limp. The idea is clearly that this compound could be used to reduce damage caused by spine injuries, offering a better chance of recovery. It’s a potentially great breakthrough and it’s even better if the person being treated doesn’t mind temporarily turning blue, which was the only reported side effect for the treated mice. Personally I’m okay with turning blue permanently if I have a spinal cord injury and I am able to walk because of this treatment. The findings out the study were published in the "Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences" and are actually a follow-up on similar research done by the same lab five years ago. In August 2004, scientists revealed how Adenosine triphosphate, which is known as, rushes to the spinal cord soon after injury occurs. Unfortunately, that the sudden influx of ATP kills off healthy cells and makes the injury worse. Researches found that injecting oxidized ATP offsets that effect and in their study, it allowed the injured rats to recover and walk again. However, those findings weren’t as encouraging as they might have seemed for lead researcher Maiken Nedergaard, professor of Neurosurgery and director of the Center for Translational Neuromedicine at the University of Rochester Medical Center, and her team. Sticking a needle into the spinal cord of a person who has just suffered a spinal cord injury isn't going to work. Thus, their most recent study. The BBG compound blocks a molecule in the spinal cord called P2X7 that allows ATP to latch onto motor neurons and send the signals which eventually kill them and BBG is extremely similar to a blue food dye approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). That gave Nedergaard the confidence to go ahead with the study and the result were pretty amazing. . The rats given BBG immediately after their injury could walk again with a limp, but those that didn't receive a dose never regained their mobility. Nedergaard is quick to point out that her team isn't touting BBG as a cure for spinal injuries, but rather as a tool that it offers a potential improvement in patients' condition. Anything that could help people who have suffered one of the most devastating injuries possible is cool with me, even if it’s also something that is used to make unhealthy, sugar-laden candy more colorful………
- School is different depending on which corner of the world you reside in. For example, here in the United States it would typically be unacceptable to test students’ pupils' karate skills by running over their outstretched arms with a motorcycle. In India…..not so much. A government school in southern India decided that the best way to test the martial arts abilities of its students was to line up in a row and stretch their arms out on the ground, then hold them in place as a motorcyclist drove over the line of arms. Pictures and videos of the event show smiling adults standing behind the children and the stunt was reportedly done with full permission from the parents of every child involved. According to K. Devarajan, the director of elementary education in Tamil Nadu state, the purpose of the event was to show the strength the students had gained from their karate classes. That’s not how state education officials saw things, because no sooner had the exhaust fumes from that bike cleared than officials were descending upon the school to speak with its leaders about what had gone on. Those authorities have now asked schools not to carry out such activities because they violate safety guidelines. Why, if I may be so bold as to ask? What could possibly go wrong when you have a powerful motorcycle being ridden over breakable body parts like the arms of children? Besides, don’t kids between six and 13 love danger? They idolize martial arts, MMA and X-Games competitors and this is their chance to emulate their heroes. Don’t deny them their dream………
- Good Lord, I hope this story is true. Previously I had no interest in the break-up of Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo and ever-expanding pop tart Jessica Simpson. Celebrity dating stories don’t hold any interest for me; what do I care if Person A and Person B break up if I don’t know either of them, even if they’re famous? However, the fashion in which the break-up reportedly occurred may force me to rethink my approach to these matters. Don’t get me wrong: I still don’t give a rat’s ass who’s dating whom or if they’ve broken up. But if the fireworks explode like they allegedly did in the case of Romo and Simpson, that’s a horse of a different color. Their relationship had been on the rocks for some time and rumors of a break-up were always there, but the relationship came to an end at one of the most awesome places a break-up could ever happen: the parking lot of an IHOP. The story making the rounds is that the two of them were in a car and had been driving for several hours, arguing as people inevitably do when cooped up in a moving vehicle for any length of time. Simpson was supposedly pressing Romo to get married, throwing down ultimatums and making demands. He was in no such hurry and given the fact that his girlfriend seemed to be on the extreme version of the Rosie O’Donnell fitness plan (take two dozen doughnuts, a banana cream pie, a bag of pork rhinds, a box of Twinkies, wash it down with a gallon of YooHoo and called me in the morning), he wasn’t going to be heading that direction any time soon. So this combustible mix was jammed into a too-small car and after a couple hours of arguing, Romo had heard enough. He pulled into the parking lot of a Texas IHOP, stopped the car and demanded that she get out. Her feet had barely hit the pavement when Romo allegedly sped off, leaving here there to wait for two hours while someone else came to pick her up. Yes, it’s almost too good to believe. A needy, wants-to-get-married chick keeps pressuring her boyfriend to commit and not only does he dump her in very public fashion, he does it in the parking lot of a random IHOP. Would you like 12 different kinds of syrup and whipped cream with your break-up, Ms. Simpson? This is a cold-hearted, balls play by Romo and I like it. He dumped her and left her to bawl her eyes out for two hours in the parking lot of a pancake house in the middle of Texas. Part of me wonders whether Romo planned it out this way, driving to the middle of nowhere to leave Simpson after breaking up with her. And to top it off, he has now put up a sign near the front gate of his home declaring a “red alert” and explaining that he’s made changes in his personal life and that Simpson is no longer among the people allowed entry onto his property. In other words, dude has had enough of the drama and is developing a bona-fide mean streak. It’s a solid play, it’s ruthless and I love it……….
- Because I both hate poison ivy and like goats, this story is a real winner in my boo. The good people of Carrboro, N.C. were struggling with the issue of how to best remove poison ivy from the dog park at Hank Anderson Community Park and they arrived at a solution that is fast becoming a lawn care trend in the United States. Carrboro town officials have decided to employ the Goat Patrol to take care of the problem, following in the footsteps of other towns that have turned to goats as a way to cut grass or remove unwanted plant life. “I think this is right up their (the goats') alley,” said David Poythress, Carrboro street superintendent. “From what we understand, they eat most of the day, and one of their favorite foods is poison ivy.” Sold! I don’t need to hear any more. Poison ivy sucks and as someone who grew up in a rural area and got poison ivy nearly every summer as a kid, this is a great idea. Besides, the amusing sight of 14 goats wandering around a park and chowing down on unwanted foliage is always a nice diversion. “What they're really good for is penetrating thick brush, overgrown areas, tackling some of the tougher, tougher plants,” Alix Bowman, owner of the Goat Patrol, said. The town also reaps the obvious benefit of having the work done without causing any damage to the environment by using gas-powered machinery. All of this comes at the low, low price of $10 a day, which is what the town pays Bowman for his goats’ services. Keep up the good work, Goat Patrol, and continue to rid the world of the menace that is poison ivy, one chewy bite at a time…….
- Keep shoveling those M&Ms into your FAT faces, America! Well, keep eating the blue M&M’s; the rest of them you can do without. Why the blue ones? Well, according to a new study conducted by researchers at the University of Rochester Medical Center, injecting the compound Brilliant Blue G (BBG), i.e. the same blue food dye found in M&Ms and Gatorade, into rats suffering spinal cord injuries allowed the rodents to walk again, albeit with a limp. The idea is clearly that this compound could be used to reduce damage caused by spine injuries, offering a better chance of recovery. It’s a potentially great breakthrough and it’s even better if the person being treated doesn’t mind temporarily turning blue, which was the only reported side effect for the treated mice. Personally I’m okay with turning blue permanently if I have a spinal cord injury and I am able to walk because of this treatment. The findings out the study were published in the "Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences" and are actually a follow-up on similar research done by the same lab five years ago. In August 2004, scientists revealed how Adenosine triphosphate, which is known as, rushes to the spinal cord soon after injury occurs. Unfortunately, that the sudden influx of ATP kills off healthy cells and makes the injury worse. Researches found that injecting oxidized ATP offsets that effect and in their study, it allowed the injured rats to recover and walk again. However, those findings weren’t as encouraging as they might have seemed for lead researcher Maiken Nedergaard, professor of Neurosurgery and director of the Center for Translational Neuromedicine at the University of Rochester Medical Center, and her team. Sticking a needle into the spinal cord of a person who has just suffered a spinal cord injury isn't going to work. Thus, their most recent study. The BBG compound blocks a molecule in the spinal cord called P2X7 that allows ATP to latch onto motor neurons and send the signals which eventually kill them and BBG is extremely similar to a blue food dye approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). That gave Nedergaard the confidence to go ahead with the study and the result were pretty amazing. . The rats given BBG immediately after their injury could walk again with a limp, but those that didn't receive a dose never regained their mobility. Nedergaard is quick to point out that her team isn't touting BBG as a cure for spinal injuries, but rather as a tool that it offers a potential improvement in patients' condition. Anything that could help people who have suffered one of the most devastating injuries possible is cool with me, even if it’s also something that is used to make unhealthy, sugar-laden candy more colorful………
- School is different depending on which corner of the world you reside in. For example, here in the United States it would typically be unacceptable to test students’ pupils' karate skills by running over their outstretched arms with a motorcycle. In India…..not so much. A government school in southern India decided that the best way to test the martial arts abilities of its students was to line up in a row and stretch their arms out on the ground, then hold them in place as a motorcyclist drove over the line of arms. Pictures and videos of the event show smiling adults standing behind the children and the stunt was reportedly done with full permission from the parents of every child involved. According to K. Devarajan, the director of elementary education in Tamil Nadu state, the purpose of the event was to show the strength the students had gained from their karate classes. That’s not how state education officials saw things, because no sooner had the exhaust fumes from that bike cleared than officials were descending upon the school to speak with its leaders about what had gone on. Those authorities have now asked schools not to carry out such activities because they violate safety guidelines. Why, if I may be so bold as to ask? What could possibly go wrong when you have a powerful motorcycle being ridden over breakable body parts like the arms of children? Besides, don’t kids between six and 13 love danger? They idolize martial arts, MMA and X-Games competitors and this is their chance to emulate their heroes. Don’t deny them their dream………
- Good Lord, I hope this story is true. Previously I had no interest in the break-up of Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo and ever-expanding pop tart Jessica Simpson. Celebrity dating stories don’t hold any interest for me; what do I care if Person A and Person B break up if I don’t know either of them, even if they’re famous? However, the fashion in which the break-up reportedly occurred may force me to rethink my approach to these matters. Don’t get me wrong: I still don’t give a rat’s ass who’s dating whom or if they’ve broken up. But if the fireworks explode like they allegedly did in the case of Romo and Simpson, that’s a horse of a different color. Their relationship had been on the rocks for some time and rumors of a break-up were always there, but the relationship came to an end at one of the most awesome places a break-up could ever happen: the parking lot of an IHOP. The story making the rounds is that the two of them were in a car and had been driving for several hours, arguing as people inevitably do when cooped up in a moving vehicle for any length of time. Simpson was supposedly pressing Romo to get married, throwing down ultimatums and making demands. He was in no such hurry and given the fact that his girlfriend seemed to be on the extreme version of the Rosie O’Donnell fitness plan (take two dozen doughnuts, a banana cream pie, a bag of pork rhinds, a box of Twinkies, wash it down with a gallon of YooHoo and called me in the morning), he wasn’t going to be heading that direction any time soon. So this combustible mix was jammed into a too-small car and after a couple hours of arguing, Romo had heard enough. He pulled into the parking lot of a Texas IHOP, stopped the car and demanded that she get out. Her feet had barely hit the pavement when Romo allegedly sped off, leaving here there to wait for two hours while someone else came to pick her up. Yes, it’s almost too good to believe. A needy, wants-to-get-married chick keeps pressuring her boyfriend to commit and not only does he dump her in very public fashion, he does it in the parking lot of a random IHOP. Would you like 12 different kinds of syrup and whipped cream with your break-up, Ms. Simpson? This is a cold-hearted, balls play by Romo and I like it. He dumped her and left her to bawl her eyes out for two hours in the parking lot of a pancake house in the middle of Texas. Part of me wonders whether Romo planned it out this way, driving to the middle of nowhere to leave Simpson after breaking up with her. And to top it off, he has now put up a sign near the front gate of his home declaring a “red alert” and explaining that he’s made changes in his personal life and that Simpson is no longer among the people allowed entry onto his property. In other words, dude has had enough of the drama and is developing a bona-fide mean streak. It’s a solid play, it’s ruthless and I love it……….
- Because I both hate poison ivy and like goats, this story is a real winner in my boo. The good people of Carrboro, N.C. were struggling with the issue of how to best remove poison ivy from the dog park at Hank Anderson Community Park and they arrived at a solution that is fast becoming a lawn care trend in the United States. Carrboro town officials have decided to employ the Goat Patrol to take care of the problem, following in the footsteps of other towns that have turned to goats as a way to cut grass or remove unwanted plant life. “I think this is right up their (the goats') alley,” said David Poythress, Carrboro street superintendent. “From what we understand, they eat most of the day, and one of their favorite foods is poison ivy.” Sold! I don’t need to hear any more. Poison ivy sucks and as someone who grew up in a rural area and got poison ivy nearly every summer as a kid, this is a great idea. Besides, the amusing sight of 14 goats wandering around a park and chowing down on unwanted foliage is always a nice diversion. “What they're really good for is penetrating thick brush, overgrown areas, tackling some of the tougher, tougher plants,” Alix Bowman, owner of the Goat Patrol, said. The town also reaps the obvious benefit of having the work done without causing any damage to the environment by using gas-powered machinery. All of this comes at the low, low price of $10 a day, which is what the town pays Bowman for his goats’ services. Keep up the good work, Goat Patrol, and continue to rid the world of the menace that is poison ivy, one chewy bite at a time…….
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Controversial sports figures and their possible returns, piracy season about to kick off and cash-for-clunkers at a dealer near you
- Yesterday was a big day for controversial figures in the world of sports looking to make their return to their respective sports. The biggest name in this trend, as it is every time this guy becomes a topic of discussion, is Pete Rose. Once again, MLB commissioner Bud Selig is said to be "seriously considering" reinstatement for Rose nearly 20 years after the game’s all-time hits leader was banned from baseball for gambling on the sport. Since agreeing to the lifetime ban handed down by then-commissioner Bart Giamatti, Rose has waited through two commissioners for a potential reinstatement. Fay Vincent, who took over as commissioner when Bart Giamatti died eight days after banishing Rose, was never inclined to seriously consider the matter. To hear Vincent, he’s still not a huge fan of Rose. "There is no indication that there's any great support for Pete Rose to get in the Hall of Fame," Vincent said in addressing Selig’s possible consideration of the matter. "If members of the Hall of Fame say we don't want him, you've made a meaningless gesture." Still, Selig has proven before that he’s more open-minded to returning Rose to the game than his predecessor. Five years ago he was on the verge of allowing Rose back into baseball and was prepared to do so if Rose would admit what he had denied for years, that he bet on baseball while managing the Cincinnati Reds. Rose resisted but ultimately decided that he would confess to gambling – in his book that he had written to make a few bucks off of the apology. When Rose issued that terse, disingenuous apology in literary form, Selig decided that maybe ol’ Pete wasn’t as serious about reinstatement as he thought. The issue went away and stayed quiet – until this weekend, when MLB held its annual Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Several of the current HOF members who attended, including true home run king (sorry Barry Bonds) Hank Aaron, spoke out in favor of Rose’ reinstatement and were reportedly in Selig’s ear about the matter. "I would like to see Pete in," Aaron said. "He belongs there.” Another HOFer, former Philadelphia Phillies third baseman Mike Schmidt, has been championing Rose’ reinstatement for years as well. Of course, Vincent is right in pointing out that being reinstated would not guarantee Rose’s entry into the Hall of Fame. If Rose were to become eligible, he would have to be voted into the Hall of Fame by the 65 living members who make up the Veterans Committee. For the first 15 years of eligibility, which begin five years after a player retires, players are voted in on the writers' ballot expires after 15 years. After that, the decision goes to the Veterans Committee. Rose has several friends and former teammates, including Joe Morgan and Frank Robinson, on that committee, but it’s tough to say what would happen if he actually came up for a vote. “I know there are still guys who feel strongly against him," said an unidentified Hall of. "And I don't know if that would change even if Selig clears him.” What I’ve always supported is allowing Rose to be in the Hall of Fame, which his states definitely merit, but not to return to work in baseball in any capacity. The last time this issue came up, Rose was reportedly opposed to that idea and wants to be reinstated so he can work in baseball, possibly even managing again. To me, that’s a bad idea and one that I can’t get behind at all……..
- Meanwhile, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has decided that his own league’s lightning rod for controversy, Michael Vick, can come back to the game he has been out of for nearly two years. Vick was freed last week after serving 18 months in prison for running a dogfighting ring and since his release, speculation over when he would be allowed to return to the NFL has been rampant. Vick and Goodell met Wednesday to discuss Vick’s case and today the commissioner issued his ruling. Vick has been granted a conditional reinstatement, which means he Vick can immediately take part in preseason practices, workouts and meetings and can play in the final two preseason games -- if he can find a team that will sign him. However, once the regular season begins he will not be allowed to play in games until at least the sixth week of the season. He can still participate in all team activities except games, but Goodell won’t consider him for full reinstatement immediately. This is the latest step in a case that began when Goodell suspended Vick indefinitely in August 2007 after Vick admitted bankrolling a dogfighting operation on his property in Virginia. After that, Vick headed off to federal prison in Kansas and was released by the Falcons. His potential return to football has never been far from the sports consciousness, but that’s a double-edged sword. People didn’t forget about him but there is an incredible amount of vitriol and resentment toward him. That includes NFL teams, one of which will have to step up and sign Vick for him to play again. Several teams, including the Dallas Cowboys, a trendy stop for troubled players, have already said publicly that they will not sign Vick. Any team that does sign him will undoubtedly have to deal with all manner of protests and outrage from animal rights groups and animal-loving fans. That team would have to weigh the pros and cons of resigning a Mike Vick who has two years of rust to knock off after being a subpar NFL quarterback prior to his arrest and jail time. As for Vick’s reinstatement, Goodell sent him a letter outlining how the next few weeks will unfold. “I accept that you are sincere when you say that you want to, and will, turn your life around, and that you intend to be a positive role model for others," Goodell said in his letter to Vick. "I am prepared to offer you that opportunity. Whether you succeed is entirely in your hands. Needless to say, your margin for error is extremely limited. I urge you to take full advantage of the resources available to support you and to dedicate yourself to rebuilding your life and your career. If you do this, the NFL will support you." In making his decision, Goodell talked to numerous current and former players and coaches and received responses he described as "very mixed.” Goodell also admitted that he knows some fans and observers will never forgive Vick no matter what he says or does. So as he waits for a team to step up and sign him, what will Vick do? In addition to training and working out, he’s also agreed to counseling. Other than that, it’s a matter of waiting, working and watching………
- Are you ready? Now that the government owns a chunk of the American auto industry and has bailed out the rest of it, the government is looking to jump-start auto sales with its cash-for-clunkers program. As automakers and dealers look out at lots full of cars following months of stagnant sales, this program is a ray of hope. It officially kicked off yesterday after being signed into law in June by President Obama and the cash-for-clunkers program offers $1 billion overall for consumers who agree to trade in their old vehicles for new, more fuel-efficient models. The concept is to stimulate sales while also taking cars low in fuel efficiency off the road. Early projections have the potential sales boost provided by the incentive at by about 200,000 units. In addition to the money being offered by the government, car dealers are tacking on their own incentives to sweeten the deal for customers. Chrysler plans to match the federal rebate dollar for dollar and any consumer shopping for a new vehicle will qualify for the program, which offers up to $4,500 for the purchase of an eligible 2009-model-year Chrysler, Jeep or Dodge vehicle. GM is also staging a direct-mail campaign to promote its own version of the program, which offers specific financial incentives in addition to existing incentives ranging up to $4,000 that GM offers on slow-selling models. All of this comes as nearly every car maker sits on a stockpile of cars will above the While 50 to 60 days' supply of cars that’s considered ideal. Chrysler is sitting on a 71-day supply and GM has an 82-day supply even after keeping most of their factories shut since the beginning of May and foreign automakers are faring no better. Suzuki has a 108-day supply, Jaguar dealers are sitting on a 92-day supply, Mitsubishi stands at 84 days and Mazda has 78 days of supply. Consider those numbers and it’s not surprising that auto sales are currently running at less than 10 million units annually — the lowest level in more than three. With the end of the model year approaching and 2010 models set to hit lots in a few weeks, 2009 vehicles will take an even bigger hit in value if they don’t sell soon. Will the cash-for-clunkers program be enough to entice consumers to take on the financial burden of a new car? I’ll say no because extra incentives or not, the government seems to forget that the American people are still struggling financially and whether a new vehicle costs them $20,000 or $16,000, many of them don’t have a hundred extra dollars to spend, let alone thousands of dollars. Thanks for the effort, though, it’s a nice thought………
- Great news everyone! After ratcheting things down a notch for monsoon season, piracy is expected to pick up in the high seas off in the days ahead. My contemporaries at the Combined Maritime Forces are looking to get out ahead of the curve by urging crews to take up safety measures, including using recognized transit corridors and alerting the proper authorities before making their voyage. "The prior preparation and vigilance of merchant mariners at all times of day and night is more important now than ever," said Rear Admiral Caner Bener of the Combined Task Force. Good advice, rear admiral, but here’s some advice for you: You cannot keep the freaking Somali pirates down no matter what. Think about it: an international coalition has been on these guys’ asses for months now and they aren’t backing down. They’re still hijacking ships, demanding and receiving ransoms and doing their pirate-y best to be the scourges of the high seas they’ve always been. Even with international forces made up of more than 30 ships and aircraft from 16 nations patrolling the specifically to stop them, these pirates will marshal their forces and pillage, plunder and loot their way to success. “While our ability to deter and disrupt attacks has improved over time, we are constantly adapting the way we do our business as the pirates adapt and modify their tactics," Bener said. Keep up that false hope, admiral. There’s a reason the waters off the coast of Somalia and in the Gulf of Aden have gained a reputation as the most dangerous and pirate-inhabited in the world and it’s the same reason that reputation will stay in place. The pirates will continue to capture dozens of vessels and hundreds of hostages, making millions of dollars in ransom demands and drinking their rum, mateys………
- Umm, is this really something newsworthy, People magazine? I know that People is a publication that’s all about celebrity gossip and reporting on the goings on in Hollywood, but that doesn’t explain what the mag is doing reporting on the love life of a reality TV loser who has never done a damn thing to contribute to the world outside of knocking up his former wife to the tune of eight kids. Jon Gosselin is neck and neck with those idiots Heidi and Spencer in the race for milking the most fame out of the least contributed to the world and they’re leading the pack by a wide margin. So watching People breathlessly report on Gosselin’s trip to Saint-Tropez with Hailey Glassman (who?) and a double date in the Hamptons with Kate Major (double who?) is simultaneously hilarious and horrifying to me. But fear not, People has cleared everything up for us! The magazine reports that Gosselin now says he's happily flying solo. "At this point ... I'm single -- per se," he told PEOPLE. “I'm just a regular guy who just wants to have friendship and good times. And I like meeting people.” Wait a minute, I think this idiot just made a salient point. He IS just a regular guy. He’s a regular, f’d up guy with a failed marriage who is in no way, shape or form a viable celebrity and shouldn’t be part of any coverage of celebrities. Just because TLC has nothing better to do with its airtime than slam Gosselin and his dysfunctional family on TV in "Jon & Kate Plus 8” doesn’t mean the rest of us have to pay any attention to him. Whether it’s because people enjoy seeing someone whose life is more screwed up than theirs or just like seeing others’ drama, I don’t know, but this show has gotten a lot more run that it should have. Because you all couldn’t contain yourselves and gave this tool the impression that he really is a celebrity, he’s now cruising around the Hamptons with Lindsay Lohan’s old man Michael, acting like he belongs. So when “Jon & Kate” returns to TLC on August 3, count on me to not be watching……
- Meanwhile, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has decided that his own league’s lightning rod for controversy, Michael Vick, can come back to the game he has been out of for nearly two years. Vick was freed last week after serving 18 months in prison for running a dogfighting ring and since his release, speculation over when he would be allowed to return to the NFL has been rampant. Vick and Goodell met Wednesday to discuss Vick’s case and today the commissioner issued his ruling. Vick has been granted a conditional reinstatement, which means he Vick can immediately take part in preseason practices, workouts and meetings and can play in the final two preseason games -- if he can find a team that will sign him. However, once the regular season begins he will not be allowed to play in games until at least the sixth week of the season. He can still participate in all team activities except games, but Goodell won’t consider him for full reinstatement immediately. This is the latest step in a case that began when Goodell suspended Vick indefinitely in August 2007 after Vick admitted bankrolling a dogfighting operation on his property in Virginia. After that, Vick headed off to federal prison in Kansas and was released by the Falcons. His potential return to football has never been far from the sports consciousness, but that’s a double-edged sword. People didn’t forget about him but there is an incredible amount of vitriol and resentment toward him. That includes NFL teams, one of which will have to step up and sign Vick for him to play again. Several teams, including the Dallas Cowboys, a trendy stop for troubled players, have already said publicly that they will not sign Vick. Any team that does sign him will undoubtedly have to deal with all manner of protests and outrage from animal rights groups and animal-loving fans. That team would have to weigh the pros and cons of resigning a Mike Vick who has two years of rust to knock off after being a subpar NFL quarterback prior to his arrest and jail time. As for Vick’s reinstatement, Goodell sent him a letter outlining how the next few weeks will unfold. “I accept that you are sincere when you say that you want to, and will, turn your life around, and that you intend to be a positive role model for others," Goodell said in his letter to Vick. "I am prepared to offer you that opportunity. Whether you succeed is entirely in your hands. Needless to say, your margin for error is extremely limited. I urge you to take full advantage of the resources available to support you and to dedicate yourself to rebuilding your life and your career. If you do this, the NFL will support you." In making his decision, Goodell talked to numerous current and former players and coaches and received responses he described as "very mixed.” Goodell also admitted that he knows some fans and observers will never forgive Vick no matter what he says or does. So as he waits for a team to step up and sign him, what will Vick do? In addition to training and working out, he’s also agreed to counseling. Other than that, it’s a matter of waiting, working and watching………
- Are you ready? Now that the government owns a chunk of the American auto industry and has bailed out the rest of it, the government is looking to jump-start auto sales with its cash-for-clunkers program. As automakers and dealers look out at lots full of cars following months of stagnant sales, this program is a ray of hope. It officially kicked off yesterday after being signed into law in June by President Obama and the cash-for-clunkers program offers $1 billion overall for consumers who agree to trade in their old vehicles for new, more fuel-efficient models. The concept is to stimulate sales while also taking cars low in fuel efficiency off the road. Early projections have the potential sales boost provided by the incentive at by about 200,000 units. In addition to the money being offered by the government, car dealers are tacking on their own incentives to sweeten the deal for customers. Chrysler plans to match the federal rebate dollar for dollar and any consumer shopping for a new vehicle will qualify for the program, which offers up to $4,500 for the purchase of an eligible 2009-model-year Chrysler, Jeep or Dodge vehicle. GM is also staging a direct-mail campaign to promote its own version of the program, which offers specific financial incentives in addition to existing incentives ranging up to $4,000 that GM offers on slow-selling models. All of this comes as nearly every car maker sits on a stockpile of cars will above the While 50 to 60 days' supply of cars that’s considered ideal. Chrysler is sitting on a 71-day supply and GM has an 82-day supply even after keeping most of their factories shut since the beginning of May and foreign automakers are faring no better. Suzuki has a 108-day supply, Jaguar dealers are sitting on a 92-day supply, Mitsubishi stands at 84 days and Mazda has 78 days of supply. Consider those numbers and it’s not surprising that auto sales are currently running at less than 10 million units annually — the lowest level in more than three. With the end of the model year approaching and 2010 models set to hit lots in a few weeks, 2009 vehicles will take an even bigger hit in value if they don’t sell soon. Will the cash-for-clunkers program be enough to entice consumers to take on the financial burden of a new car? I’ll say no because extra incentives or not, the government seems to forget that the American people are still struggling financially and whether a new vehicle costs them $20,000 or $16,000, many of them don’t have a hundred extra dollars to spend, let alone thousands of dollars. Thanks for the effort, though, it’s a nice thought………
- Great news everyone! After ratcheting things down a notch for monsoon season, piracy is expected to pick up in the high seas off in the days ahead. My contemporaries at the Combined Maritime Forces are looking to get out ahead of the curve by urging crews to take up safety measures, including using recognized transit corridors and alerting the proper authorities before making their voyage. "The prior preparation and vigilance of merchant mariners at all times of day and night is more important now than ever," said Rear Admiral Caner Bener of the Combined Task Force. Good advice, rear admiral, but here’s some advice for you: You cannot keep the freaking Somali pirates down no matter what. Think about it: an international coalition has been on these guys’ asses for months now and they aren’t backing down. They’re still hijacking ships, demanding and receiving ransoms and doing their pirate-y best to be the scourges of the high seas they’ve always been. Even with international forces made up of more than 30 ships and aircraft from 16 nations patrolling the specifically to stop them, these pirates will marshal their forces and pillage, plunder and loot their way to success. “While our ability to deter and disrupt attacks has improved over time, we are constantly adapting the way we do our business as the pirates adapt and modify their tactics," Bener said. Keep up that false hope, admiral. There’s a reason the waters off the coast of Somalia and in the Gulf of Aden have gained a reputation as the most dangerous and pirate-inhabited in the world and it’s the same reason that reputation will stay in place. The pirates will continue to capture dozens of vessels and hundreds of hostages, making millions of dollars in ransom demands and drinking their rum, mateys………
- Umm, is this really something newsworthy, People magazine? I know that People is a publication that’s all about celebrity gossip and reporting on the goings on in Hollywood, but that doesn’t explain what the mag is doing reporting on the love life of a reality TV loser who has never done a damn thing to contribute to the world outside of knocking up his former wife to the tune of eight kids. Jon Gosselin is neck and neck with those idiots Heidi and Spencer in the race for milking the most fame out of the least contributed to the world and they’re leading the pack by a wide margin. So watching People breathlessly report on Gosselin’s trip to Saint-Tropez with Hailey Glassman (who?) and a double date in the Hamptons with Kate Major (double who?) is simultaneously hilarious and horrifying to me. But fear not, People has cleared everything up for us! The magazine reports that Gosselin now says he's happily flying solo. "At this point ... I'm single -- per se," he told PEOPLE. “I'm just a regular guy who just wants to have friendship and good times. And I like meeting people.” Wait a minute, I think this idiot just made a salient point. He IS just a regular guy. He’s a regular, f’d up guy with a failed marriage who is in no way, shape or form a viable celebrity and shouldn’t be part of any coverage of celebrities. Just because TLC has nothing better to do with its airtime than slam Gosselin and his dysfunctional family on TV in "Jon & Kate Plus 8” doesn’t mean the rest of us have to pay any attention to him. Whether it’s because people enjoy seeing someone whose life is more screwed up than theirs or just like seeing others’ drama, I don’t know, but this show has gotten a lot more run that it should have. Because you all couldn’t contain yourselves and gave this tool the impression that he really is a celebrity, he’s now cruising around the Hamptons with Lindsay Lohan’s old man Michael, acting like he belongs. So when “Jon & Kate” returns to TLC on August 3, count on me to not be watching……
Monday, July 27, 2009
Rickey enters the hall of fame, the luxury cell phone market takes a hit and another vote for Ahmadinejad to potentially rig
- Sweeet! Another vote for Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to rig, er, win legitimately! After thieving his country’s recent presidential election and setting off riots and protests that have yet to cease, Ahmadinejad may have to face a vote of confidence in parliament for the final few days of his current term after firing two members of his cabinet. Although the state-run Islamic Republic News Agency (IRNA) is following the script and spouting the party line that only one cabinet member was fired, so no such vote would be needed, don’t bet on it. The way this works is that Iran has 21 ministries and to the country's constitution, if more than half the cabinet members are changed in a single term of presidency, a vote of confidence in Iran's parliament is required. Up to this point in his presidency, Ahmadinejad has replaced nine cabinet members. If this report is true and he’s canned two more, that would push him over the magical 50 percent barrier and necessitate that vote of confidence. Now I have no illusions about how that vote would go because clearly Ahmadinejad would not allow it to go against him. I’m not sure how one goes about rigging a parliamentary vote (threats, intimidation, physical violence?), but I’m sure my man Mahmoud does. Multiple news outlets are reporting that Ahmadinejad has indeed fired two ministers, intelligence minister Mohseni Ejeie and culture minister Saffar Harandi. According to one Iranian news outlet, Ahmadinejad was feverishly attempting to convince Harandi in order to avoid a confidence vote. Ahmad Tavakoli, a powerful rightist member of parliament who does not support Ahmadinejad, spoke about the firings thusly: "I advise the president to change his mind. Firing the ministers has no logical reason and creates difficult conditions for the country. This is not a suitable response to the trust of 24 million people who voted for the president." Well, I guess the big problem with that quote is its basis on the assumption that anything the megalomaniacal Ahmadinejad does it based on logic and not on self-serving, power-hungry greed…….
- Even rich golfers and major corporations aren’t exempt from the economic crisis gripping the United States nowadays. Apparently this week's Buick Open, one of the oldest events on the PGA Tour, will be the final version of the event. As financially-bumbling General Motors lurches through its many monetary issues and trials, the company has announced that it is pulling its sponsorship of the event after 51 years. However, it is believed that a new sponsor will be formally announced and a new venue for the to-be-renamed event will be announced some time next week. Well at least the Buick Open will go out on a high note, a Tiger Woods is in the field for the tournament, which starts Thursday at Warwick Hills Golf Club in Grand Blanc, Mich. "Buick doesn't have the finances; GM can't afford it," Tom Pernice Jr., a member of the Tour's Player Advisory Council, said. "From a perception standpoint, you can't lay off all those people and then sponsor a golf tournament.” Duly noted and 100 percent on the mark. The fact is that sponsoring a golf tournament is exactly the sort of wasteful spending that a company that has been bailed out by the government and taxpayers can’t afford. It’s sure as heck not a solid choice to spend advertising dollars. Larry Peck, Buick-GMC's national promotions manager, admitted last week that the company was facing some difficult financial decisions ahead but at the time maintained that no decision had been made about the Buick Open. He was likely doing what executives do, namely stonewalling and not giving up valuable information, because you can bet this decision has been in the making for some time. The discontinuation of the Buick Open also raises questions about the Buick Invitational, which is held early in the season at Torrey Pines Golf Course in San Diego. Buick has sponsored that tournament since 1992 and like the Buick Open, its sponsorship contract with the automaker runs through 2010. Not that fans give a crap who sponsors a tournament, but this simply proves that every sport on the American sports landscape is in dire financial straits going forward………
- Big ups to a bunch of animated gerbils for kicking the cinematic sh*t out of that tool Harry Potter and the lame-tastic romantic comedy attempt of Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler. Yes, Disney's family comedy "G-Force," produced by Jerry Bruckheimer and featuring the voices of Nicolas Cage, Will Arnett, and Penelope Cruz, was tops at the box office this weekend. The team of gerbils saving the world banked made an estimated $32.2 million in its debut to knock off last weekend’s No. 1 film, "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince,” which brought in $30 million, bringing its total to $221.8 million. Better still, “G-Force” did so by pulling 55 percent of its viewers from the under-18 crowd, which should be where “Potter” pulls most of its fans from (it should be, but sadly I’m guessing it isn't). Despite finishing second this weekend, 'Half-Blood' is already the fifth biggest hit of the year domestically. When you factor in its overseas take, the movie had banked an additional $236 million. For adults with the good taste not to go see a dorky movie about a bunch of wizards, there was…..um, a really awful raunchy R-rated romantic comedy? Super. Yes, it’s likely that a lot of guys out there were dragged to see "The Ugly Truth," starring Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler in a battle of the sexes. Thus, the movie opened with a respectable $27 million take. Another newcomer was Warner Bros' creepy "Orphan" -- starring Peter Sarsgaard and Vera Farmiga – with $12.8. One of the more profitable movies in theaters continues to be Fox Searchlight's "(500) Days of Summer" (at No. 11 with $3 million) which averaged $19,176 per site and scored a 95 percent increase over its debut last weekend. Not exactly a weekend of exciting summer blockbusters to feast your movie-going eyes on, but I’ve seen worse….I think………
- At the top I mentioned the toll the country’s economic woes are taking on rich golfers and car companies. Sadly, Average Joe Wealthy Guy is taking a hit as well. No longer can AJWG afford to spend $3,000 for a luxury cell phone. Yes, makers of luxury phones, such as Motorola, Bang & Olufson, LG and Vertu are finding that their clientele is no longer interested in shilling out megabucks for with exclusive devices that carry designer logos and promise craftsmanship from materials such as sapphire and stainless steel. Those companies are taking the hint and scaling back their tacky, over-the-top phones. Last week, Motorola canceled the Ivory E18, a device tentatively priced around $3,000 due to a lack of interest from telecom carriers. The decision stands in stark contrast to Motorola’s approach just 10 months ago, when it Motorola offered a $2,000 phone, called the Aura, which was fashioned out of stainless steel and sported a 62-carat sapphire crystal lens. Not to be outdone, Samsung launched the M75500 Night Effect phone, which carried the Emporio Armani insignia, last September. Yet these are different times for Motorola, Samsung and Vertu, a company that makes true luxury phones, the cheapest of which costs about $6,000. They are hard timed for companies like Bang & Olufsen, which shut down its cell phone business and $1,500-plus phones recently. Ironically enough, luxury phones have never been a huge seller in North America, where you’d think American consumerism and penchant for excess would make them a hit. However, luxury phone makers have typically found much more success in emerging markets. Finding that success becomes much tougher when the entire free world is in an economic freefall and your phones can retail for as much as $70,000, which is what one can expect to pay for a Vertu device, wrapped in platinum. You know it’s a luxury phone when it’s designed in collaboration with luxury jewels house Boucheron, which some of Vertu’s more expensive models are. Those factors may make luxury phones unique, but one thing they have in common with the average flip phone carried by a soccer mom in suburban Dallas is that they become obsolete quickly as newer, glitzier phones come on the market. Just don’t tell all of this to Vertu, which is hunkering down and looking to prove that luxury phones are still a viable product. The company will launch the Carbon Fibre Ascent Ti in August, a phone made of high-gloss carbon fiber with a sandblasted titanium surface, all for the low, low price of $9,800……….
- Never had I been more pumped for a hall of fame induction in any sport than I was for Sunday’s Baseball Hall of Fame ceremonies to welcome freaking Rickey Henderson to the game’s most elite club. I don’t have time to recount all of the classic tales of Rickey being Rickey, but my favorite has to be him approaching teammate John Olerud while playing in Toronto and informing the laconic Olerud that he had previously playd with a teammate who wore a plastic batting helmet while playing in the field as opposed to the normal baseball cap other players wear, a practice Olerud was well-known for. Upon hearing Rickey’s insight, Olerud promptly replied, “I know Rick, that was me.” Freaking awesome. The two had played together in New York but Rickey being Rickey, he had no idea. Bearing all of these stories in mind, I was jacked for yesterday’s ceremony. Unfortunately, Rickey decided to dial it down and approach his speech with a modicum of respectfulness and humility, which totally sucked. "My journey as a player is complete," Henderson said. "I am now in the class of the greatest players of all time, and at this moment I am very humbled." Not what I wanted to hear, Rick. What I wanted was some new version of you stealing second base to become baseball’s all-time leading base stealer, ripping the base from the ground and holding it aloft over your head as you announced to the crowd via the provided microphone, “Lou Brock was a great base stealer, but today I am the greatest of all-time,” as Lou Brock looked on from the front row of the stands. This was not the time for humility, even if Henderson’s speech did include an amusing anecdote about how his lifelong dream was to play pro football for the Oakland Raiders. "My dream was to play football for the Oakland Raiders," Henderson said. "But my mother thought I would get hurt playing football, so she chose baseball for me. I guess moms do know best." Rickey also shared a funny story about to a trick played by his former Babe Ruth coach, Hank Thomasson. "He tricked me into playing by coming to pick me up with a glazed donut and a cup of hot chocolate," said Henderson. "That was the way he would get me up and out of bed.” Thanks to Thomasson’s help, Henderson went on to Henderson lead the American League in steals 12 times and set the records for steals (1,406), runs scored (2,295), unintentional walks (2,129) and homers leading off a game (81). He was drafted by the Oakland Athletics on the fourth round in 1976, made his major league debut with Oakland in late June 1979 and went on to play for a total of nine teams in his career. Remembering his major league debut, Henderson cited it as a day he would never forget. “That was the most thrilling time of my life. Charlie (former Oakland owner Charles Finley), wherever you're at, and that donkey, I want to say thank you for that opportunity.” Also inducted yesterday was former Boston Red Sox outfielder Jim Rice, who was actually in his final year of eligibility to be voted into the Hall. He was much quieter and more reclusive than Henderson during his career, so I didn’t look forward to Rice’s speech nearly as much. However, I also didn’t get as much of Rickey being Rickey as I had hoped for either……..
- Even rich golfers and major corporations aren’t exempt from the economic crisis gripping the United States nowadays. Apparently this week's Buick Open, one of the oldest events on the PGA Tour, will be the final version of the event. As financially-bumbling General Motors lurches through its many monetary issues and trials, the company has announced that it is pulling its sponsorship of the event after 51 years. However, it is believed that a new sponsor will be formally announced and a new venue for the to-be-renamed event will be announced some time next week. Well at least the Buick Open will go out on a high note, a Tiger Woods is in the field for the tournament, which starts Thursday at Warwick Hills Golf Club in Grand Blanc, Mich. "Buick doesn't have the finances; GM can't afford it," Tom Pernice Jr., a member of the Tour's Player Advisory Council, said. "From a perception standpoint, you can't lay off all those people and then sponsor a golf tournament.” Duly noted and 100 percent on the mark. The fact is that sponsoring a golf tournament is exactly the sort of wasteful spending that a company that has been bailed out by the government and taxpayers can’t afford. It’s sure as heck not a solid choice to spend advertising dollars. Larry Peck, Buick-GMC's national promotions manager, admitted last week that the company was facing some difficult financial decisions ahead but at the time maintained that no decision had been made about the Buick Open. He was likely doing what executives do, namely stonewalling and not giving up valuable information, because you can bet this decision has been in the making for some time. The discontinuation of the Buick Open also raises questions about the Buick Invitational, which is held early in the season at Torrey Pines Golf Course in San Diego. Buick has sponsored that tournament since 1992 and like the Buick Open, its sponsorship contract with the automaker runs through 2010. Not that fans give a crap who sponsors a tournament, but this simply proves that every sport on the American sports landscape is in dire financial straits going forward………
- Big ups to a bunch of animated gerbils for kicking the cinematic sh*t out of that tool Harry Potter and the lame-tastic romantic comedy attempt of Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler. Yes, Disney's family comedy "G-Force," produced by Jerry Bruckheimer and featuring the voices of Nicolas Cage, Will Arnett, and Penelope Cruz, was tops at the box office this weekend. The team of gerbils saving the world banked made an estimated $32.2 million in its debut to knock off last weekend’s No. 1 film, "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince,” which brought in $30 million, bringing its total to $221.8 million. Better still, “G-Force” did so by pulling 55 percent of its viewers from the under-18 crowd, which should be where “Potter” pulls most of its fans from (it should be, but sadly I’m guessing it isn't). Despite finishing second this weekend, 'Half-Blood' is already the fifth biggest hit of the year domestically. When you factor in its overseas take, the movie had banked an additional $236 million. For adults with the good taste not to go see a dorky movie about a bunch of wizards, there was…..um, a really awful raunchy R-rated romantic comedy? Super. Yes, it’s likely that a lot of guys out there were dragged to see "The Ugly Truth," starring Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler in a battle of the sexes. Thus, the movie opened with a respectable $27 million take. Another newcomer was Warner Bros' creepy "Orphan" -- starring Peter Sarsgaard and Vera Farmiga – with $12.8. One of the more profitable movies in theaters continues to be Fox Searchlight's "(500) Days of Summer" (at No. 11 with $3 million) which averaged $19,176 per site and scored a 95 percent increase over its debut last weekend. Not exactly a weekend of exciting summer blockbusters to feast your movie-going eyes on, but I’ve seen worse….I think………
- At the top I mentioned the toll the country’s economic woes are taking on rich golfers and car companies. Sadly, Average Joe Wealthy Guy is taking a hit as well. No longer can AJWG afford to spend $3,000 for a luxury cell phone. Yes, makers of luxury phones, such as Motorola, Bang & Olufson, LG and Vertu are finding that their clientele is no longer interested in shilling out megabucks for with exclusive devices that carry designer logos and promise craftsmanship from materials such as sapphire and stainless steel. Those companies are taking the hint and scaling back their tacky, over-the-top phones. Last week, Motorola canceled the Ivory E18, a device tentatively priced around $3,000 due to a lack of interest from telecom carriers. The decision stands in stark contrast to Motorola’s approach just 10 months ago, when it Motorola offered a $2,000 phone, called the Aura, which was fashioned out of stainless steel and sported a 62-carat sapphire crystal lens. Not to be outdone, Samsung launched the M75500 Night Effect phone, which carried the Emporio Armani insignia, last September. Yet these are different times for Motorola, Samsung and Vertu, a company that makes true luxury phones, the cheapest of which costs about $6,000. They are hard timed for companies like Bang & Olufsen, which shut down its cell phone business and $1,500-plus phones recently. Ironically enough, luxury phones have never been a huge seller in North America, where you’d think American consumerism and penchant for excess would make them a hit. However, luxury phone makers have typically found much more success in emerging markets. Finding that success becomes much tougher when the entire free world is in an economic freefall and your phones can retail for as much as $70,000, which is what one can expect to pay for a Vertu device, wrapped in platinum. You know it’s a luxury phone when it’s designed in collaboration with luxury jewels house Boucheron, which some of Vertu’s more expensive models are. Those factors may make luxury phones unique, but one thing they have in common with the average flip phone carried by a soccer mom in suburban Dallas is that they become obsolete quickly as newer, glitzier phones come on the market. Just don’t tell all of this to Vertu, which is hunkering down and looking to prove that luxury phones are still a viable product. The company will launch the Carbon Fibre Ascent Ti in August, a phone made of high-gloss carbon fiber with a sandblasted titanium surface, all for the low, low price of $9,800……….
- Never had I been more pumped for a hall of fame induction in any sport than I was for Sunday’s Baseball Hall of Fame ceremonies to welcome freaking Rickey Henderson to the game’s most elite club. I don’t have time to recount all of the classic tales of Rickey being Rickey, but my favorite has to be him approaching teammate John Olerud while playing in Toronto and informing the laconic Olerud that he had previously playd with a teammate who wore a plastic batting helmet while playing in the field as opposed to the normal baseball cap other players wear, a practice Olerud was well-known for. Upon hearing Rickey’s insight, Olerud promptly replied, “I know Rick, that was me.” Freaking awesome. The two had played together in New York but Rickey being Rickey, he had no idea. Bearing all of these stories in mind, I was jacked for yesterday’s ceremony. Unfortunately, Rickey decided to dial it down and approach his speech with a modicum of respectfulness and humility, which totally sucked. "My journey as a player is complete," Henderson said. "I am now in the class of the greatest players of all time, and at this moment I am very humbled." Not what I wanted to hear, Rick. What I wanted was some new version of you stealing second base to become baseball’s all-time leading base stealer, ripping the base from the ground and holding it aloft over your head as you announced to the crowd via the provided microphone, “Lou Brock was a great base stealer, but today I am the greatest of all-time,” as Lou Brock looked on from the front row of the stands. This was not the time for humility, even if Henderson’s speech did include an amusing anecdote about how his lifelong dream was to play pro football for the Oakland Raiders. "My dream was to play football for the Oakland Raiders," Henderson said. "But my mother thought I would get hurt playing football, so she chose baseball for me. I guess moms do know best." Rickey also shared a funny story about to a trick played by his former Babe Ruth coach, Hank Thomasson. "He tricked me into playing by coming to pick me up with a glazed donut and a cup of hot chocolate," said Henderson. "That was the way he would get me up and out of bed.” Thanks to Thomasson’s help, Henderson went on to Henderson lead the American League in steals 12 times and set the records for steals (1,406), runs scored (2,295), unintentional walks (2,129) and homers leading off a game (81). He was drafted by the Oakland Athletics on the fourth round in 1976, made his major league debut with Oakland in late June 1979 and went on to play for a total of nine teams in his career. Remembering his major league debut, Henderson cited it as a day he would never forget. “That was the most thrilling time of my life. Charlie (former Oakland owner Charles Finley), wherever you're at, and that donkey, I want to say thank you for that opportunity.” Also inducted yesterday was former Boston Red Sox outfielder Jim Rice, who was actually in his final year of eligibility to be voted into the Hall. He was much quieter and more reclusive than Henderson during his career, so I didn’t look forward to Rice’s speech nearly as much. However, I also didn’t get as much of Rickey being Rickey as I had hoped for either……..
Sunday, July 26, 2009
The renwed drive to legalize the hippie lettuce in California, making much of nothing in college football and things not to say in Saudi Arabia
- Here is the ultimate illustration of why nothing that happens before the first snap of the college football season matters at all. As the Southeastern Conference held its media days (yes, days as in plural, more than one), the big “controversy” was which SEC coach had the audacity to not vote for All-Everything University of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow as first team preseason all-SEC. Only one coach committed this horrific offense, but it led to a freaking witch hunt that occurred with a frightening intensity and scrutiny. Coach after coach took to the podium and denied that he was the one who voted Mississippi's Jevan Snead as the first-team quarterback, and not Tebow. Every coach in the conference said on the record or confirmed through a spokesperson that he voted for Tebow - except for former UF coach and current South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier. The Old Ball Coach finally solved the mystery by admitting that he was the one who snubbed Florida's Tim Tebow in the coaches' voting on the preseason All-SEC team. However, the OBC then tried to pass it off as an innocent mistake that happened because his director of football operations had filled out the ballot and brought it in to him rather than Spurrier filling it out himself. It seems wrong that some staffer would fill out the ballot for a coaches’ poll, but the reality is that it’s done that way by nearly every coach in every sport at every school who votes for one of these polls or teams. Spurrier shoved his director of football operations under the bus before then trying to step back in and deflect some of the blame on himself. "I take full responsibility," he said, emphasizing that he believed Tebow to be one of the best quarterbacks in Florida history. "I'm embarrassed about it, I feel badly about it ... I apologize to Tim Tebow." He explained that he glanced at the ballot quickly before approving it, but that he didn’t realize the mistake of omitting Tebow until later. Spurrier then called SEC associate commissioner Charles Bloom and asked that his ballot be changed to include Tebow as the first-team quarterback. All of this…..well, it couldn’t be more ridiculous. These preseason teams are the most ginormous waste of time, a meaningless exercise based solely on reputation. Unless these coaches somehow have become clairvoyants and can predict the future, who they think is the best player at the start of the season could not matter less. I realize that there are no games to talk about yet and everyone is raring to get their football fix, but perhaps it’s time to take it down a notch so that we don’t end up wasting time talking about things as absurd and irrelevant as this……….
- It’s a sad day for both beer drinkers and for people in Lawrenceville, Pa. After nearly 150 years, the Iron City brewery has closed its door and will no longer be bottling beer. Friday marked the final day of kegging at the Lawrenceville location, where production started in 1868. The plant’s 51 workers will soon be without a job once the plant winds down operations, cleans up and turns out the lights. "Everybody is just kind of down. Because not only did a lot of the guys work here, but their brothers worked here and their fathers worked here. And there's a couple their grandfathers (who) worked here," said Don Conners, an employee who has worked for the company for 30 years. The plant will now relocate to the City Brewing Company plant in Latrobe, where president and CEO Tim Hickman feels it will be more financially viable. "For us to keep these brands alive we had to move. If we would try and stay on this plant, those brands would go away," Hickman said. By making the move, Iron City will be able to increase production from 170,000 barrels a year to 1 million. Hickman also said that staying in Lawrenceville would have meant spending millions of dollars to keep the plant running. For its final act as an operating plant, the Lawrenceville facility processed 120 half kegs for its last batch of beer. Over the next few months, the company will undertake the process of decommissioning the plant -- turning off the power and sanitizing the equipment. “(After) 147 years it's going to take us awhile to go square foot by square foot, room by room, to shut this place down,” Hickman said. Sympathies to the people of Lawrenceville and especially the plant’s former employees for what has to be an incredibly difficult loss, let’s everyone toss back a cold one in their honor…….
- Reality TV, ruining lives the whole world ‘round. It’s true in the United States and it’s certainly true in Saudi Arabia, where a Saudi man was arrested after bragging about his sex life on television. Mazen Abdul Jawad went on a show called "Red Line" on Lebanese channel LBC, where he shared "graphic details about his sexual conquests.” A segment of the show has made its way to YouTube (of course it has) and the clip shows Abdul Jawad talking about sex and foreplay. He also shares a very charming story about losing his virginity to a neighbor while he was 14. That was probably a bad play in Saudi Arabia, an extremely conservative nation where pre-marital sex is illegal and unrelated men and women are not allowed to mingle. When asked about the situation involving Abdul Jawad, Ahmad Qasim Al-Ghamdi, director of Mecca's branch of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, sounded a wee bit upset. "It is wrong to host people on television to speak publicly about vice and issues against our religion," said Al-Ghamdi, one of the top officials for a group also known as the country’s religious police. "The program presents anomalies and deviancy in society that are unacceptable and immoral, and should be punished according to Shariah." Amazingly, more than 100 people have filed a complaint against Abdul Jawad, alleging among other things, that he violated a principle of Shariah law by "publicizing his sinful behavior." In other words, these people are actively looking to narc out one of their own because of something he said on a TV show in another country. Way to stick together and look out for one another, Saudis………….
- All aboard the gravy train! “Batman: The Dark Knight” was a ridiculously successful smash at the box office and once it went to DVD/Blu-Ray, so why wouldn’t the video game world try to cash in on the money-making? Emmy-winning TV writer Paul Dini is the man making that push after creating "Batman: Arkham Asylum," a video game coming out in late August. He’s taken the popular characters from the movie and incorporated them into a dark, movie-like game that is already creating a lot of buzz among fans. They’re clearly eager to enjoy the adventure of Batman and his most notorious nemesis, the Joker doing battle. “This is the Batman movie I would have liked to have written," said Dini. "This is him with all the good stuff." He drummed up some additional buzz for the game by taking part in the Legion of Dorks, er, Comi-Con convention in San Diego over the weekend. According to Dini, the game pits Batman against Joker after the villain traps him inside Arkham Asylum, which played a key role in “Batman Returns,” which preceded “Dark Knight” in the revival of the previously tired “Batman” franchise. Of course, Arkham is Gotham's psychiatric hospital for the criminally insane. In the game the Joker first traps Batman inside the asylum and then releases the inmates, including some of Batman's most ferocious enemies: Bane, Harley Quinn, Mr. Zsasz, Poison Ivy and Killer Croc. Video games are nothing new to the Batman franchise, as there have been numerous projects over the past two-plus decades. However, "Arkham Asylum" is by far the most detailed and ambitious attempt to this point. It will be released for the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and Microsoft Windows by Rocksteady Studios. Although the game does draw from the last two movies and characters made popular in previous films, Dini has no direct tie-in to any one movie and was thus allowed to craft an original story from his own imagination. He had plenty to draw from, having worked on Batman comic books and written episodes of "Batman: The Animated Series" and later, "Batman Beyond." Oh, and he’s also written for the ABC’s hit "Lost," so he has that going for him as well. Dini has channeled some star power for his game too, with the Joker voiced by Mark Hamill, a.k.a. Luke Skywalker in the "Star Wars" franchise. So will the game live up to the hype once it officially debuts? The jury is still out on that one, but Dini definitely has the credentials to create a winner……..
- Richard Lee is my kind of guy. The resident of Oakland, Calif. is one of the leaders of the charge to legalize pot in the state of California and he’s not shy about promoting his cause. He’s the founder of Oaksterdam University, which he describes as a trade school that specializes in how to grow, market and consume the hippie lettuce. Lee claims some 3,500 graduates from his stoner school and also owns a medical marijuana dispensary, a coffee house, a large indoor marijuana plantation, and a museum/store devoted to the cause of legalizing marijuana. “I really see this as following the history of alcohol. The way prohibition was repealed there,” Lee states. To that end, Lee is spearheading a petition drive to place a marijuana legalization measure on the ballot in 2010. Furthermore, he is confident that such a measure has an excellent chance of being approved by voters and he just may be right. A recent California Field Poll showed that more than half the people in the state would approve of decriminalizing pot. See, I knew there was a reason I loved Californians. It’s the biggest win-win of all-time, because legalizing the chronic could generate an estimated $1 billion a year in state taxes and weed would instantly become California's No. 1 cash crop. It could even inspire other states to follow suit and in a short time, we could be a nation of stoners. Lee has a kindred spirit in Democratic State Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, who is driving a cannabis legalization bill in the California Assembly. His primary motivation appears to be the tax revenues, which is a) not surprising given him being a politician and b) totally irrelevant. I don’t give a damn why someone supports legalizing pot as long as they support legalizing pot. But what I also love about Ammiano is that he has a grander vision for bringing pot to the masses. “It could be a Walgreens, it could be a hospital, a medical marijuana facility, whatever could be convenient. Adequate enforcement of the rules. Nobody under 21. No driving under the influence,” he explained. I’m choosing to overlook that comment about no one under 21 and strictly enforcing rules, because we all know those things will fall by the wayside anyhow should this bill pass. Those who want tree will get tree whether they are old enough or not. So what does the Gover-nator, Ah-nold Schwarzenegger, think of the idea? Amazingly, he says legalizing marijuana deserves serious consideration. “I think we ought to study very carefully what other countries are doing that have legalized marijuana," Schwarzenegger says. Hmm, so if the governor is on board and there is a legislator willing to introduce the bill, what’s the hang-up? According to Ammiano, legalizing the hippie lettuce is tough because his fellow legislators worry about what the public would think if they publicly supported such a bill. “If we held the vote in the hallway, we'd have it done," Ammiano says. "But people are necessarily cautious. They are up for re-election.” For that reason, he believes there is a much better chance of voters pushing the issue through than there is of their elected representatives getting the job done. Still, Paul Chabot, president of the Coalition for a Drug Free California. This ass-hated square is standing up against this wonderful idea and claiming that promises of economic benefits are pipe dreams. “It's their way of sort of desensitizing our communities, our state and our nation to a drug problem that we clearly need to put our foot down on, and say, 'No more. Enough is enough.'” Sorry Paul, maybe you should try taking that stick out of your ass and saying that again, because I didn’t understand you. Don’t ruin something beautiful with your overly conservative, behind-the-times thinking. You and your views are antiquated and out of touch, period. Embrace that view that most of your fellow Californians have come to accept, namely that herb is not going away and it’s time the state made some money from it………
- It’s a sad day for both beer drinkers and for people in Lawrenceville, Pa. After nearly 150 years, the Iron City brewery has closed its door and will no longer be bottling beer. Friday marked the final day of kegging at the Lawrenceville location, where production started in 1868. The plant’s 51 workers will soon be without a job once the plant winds down operations, cleans up and turns out the lights. "Everybody is just kind of down. Because not only did a lot of the guys work here, but their brothers worked here and their fathers worked here. And there's a couple their grandfathers (who) worked here," said Don Conners, an employee who has worked for the company for 30 years. The plant will now relocate to the City Brewing Company plant in Latrobe, where president and CEO Tim Hickman feels it will be more financially viable. "For us to keep these brands alive we had to move. If we would try and stay on this plant, those brands would go away," Hickman said. By making the move, Iron City will be able to increase production from 170,000 barrels a year to 1 million. Hickman also said that staying in Lawrenceville would have meant spending millions of dollars to keep the plant running. For its final act as an operating plant, the Lawrenceville facility processed 120 half kegs for its last batch of beer. Over the next few months, the company will undertake the process of decommissioning the plant -- turning off the power and sanitizing the equipment. “(After) 147 years it's going to take us awhile to go square foot by square foot, room by room, to shut this place down,” Hickman said. Sympathies to the people of Lawrenceville and especially the plant’s former employees for what has to be an incredibly difficult loss, let’s everyone toss back a cold one in their honor…….
- Reality TV, ruining lives the whole world ‘round. It’s true in the United States and it’s certainly true in Saudi Arabia, where a Saudi man was arrested after bragging about his sex life on television. Mazen Abdul Jawad went on a show called "Red Line" on Lebanese channel LBC, where he shared "graphic details about his sexual conquests.” A segment of the show has made its way to YouTube (of course it has) and the clip shows Abdul Jawad talking about sex and foreplay. He also shares a very charming story about losing his virginity to a neighbor while he was 14. That was probably a bad play in Saudi Arabia, an extremely conservative nation where pre-marital sex is illegal and unrelated men and women are not allowed to mingle. When asked about the situation involving Abdul Jawad, Ahmad Qasim Al-Ghamdi, director of Mecca's branch of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, sounded a wee bit upset. "It is wrong to host people on television to speak publicly about vice and issues against our religion," said Al-Ghamdi, one of the top officials for a group also known as the country’s religious police. "The program presents anomalies and deviancy in society that are unacceptable and immoral, and should be punished according to Shariah." Amazingly, more than 100 people have filed a complaint against Abdul Jawad, alleging among other things, that he violated a principle of Shariah law by "publicizing his sinful behavior." In other words, these people are actively looking to narc out one of their own because of something he said on a TV show in another country. Way to stick together and look out for one another, Saudis………….
- All aboard the gravy train! “Batman: The Dark Knight” was a ridiculously successful smash at the box office and once it went to DVD/Blu-Ray, so why wouldn’t the video game world try to cash in on the money-making? Emmy-winning TV writer Paul Dini is the man making that push after creating "Batman: Arkham Asylum," a video game coming out in late August. He’s taken the popular characters from the movie and incorporated them into a dark, movie-like game that is already creating a lot of buzz among fans. They’re clearly eager to enjoy the adventure of Batman and his most notorious nemesis, the Joker doing battle. “This is the Batman movie I would have liked to have written," said Dini. "This is him with all the good stuff." He drummed up some additional buzz for the game by taking part in the Legion of Dorks, er, Comi-Con convention in San Diego over the weekend. According to Dini, the game pits Batman against Joker after the villain traps him inside Arkham Asylum, which played a key role in “Batman Returns,” which preceded “Dark Knight” in the revival of the previously tired “Batman” franchise. Of course, Arkham is Gotham's psychiatric hospital for the criminally insane. In the game the Joker first traps Batman inside the asylum and then releases the inmates, including some of Batman's most ferocious enemies: Bane, Harley Quinn, Mr. Zsasz, Poison Ivy and Killer Croc. Video games are nothing new to the Batman franchise, as there have been numerous projects over the past two-plus decades. However, "Arkham Asylum" is by far the most detailed and ambitious attempt to this point. It will be released for the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and Microsoft Windows by Rocksteady Studios. Although the game does draw from the last two movies and characters made popular in previous films, Dini has no direct tie-in to any one movie and was thus allowed to craft an original story from his own imagination. He had plenty to draw from, having worked on Batman comic books and written episodes of "Batman: The Animated Series" and later, "Batman Beyond." Oh, and he’s also written for the ABC’s hit "Lost," so he has that going for him as well. Dini has channeled some star power for his game too, with the Joker voiced by Mark Hamill, a.k.a. Luke Skywalker in the "Star Wars" franchise. So will the game live up to the hype once it officially debuts? The jury is still out on that one, but Dini definitely has the credentials to create a winner……..
- Richard Lee is my kind of guy. The resident of Oakland, Calif. is one of the leaders of the charge to legalize pot in the state of California and he’s not shy about promoting his cause. He’s the founder of Oaksterdam University, which he describes as a trade school that specializes in how to grow, market and consume the hippie lettuce. Lee claims some 3,500 graduates from his stoner school and also owns a medical marijuana dispensary, a coffee house, a large indoor marijuana plantation, and a museum/store devoted to the cause of legalizing marijuana. “I really see this as following the history of alcohol. The way prohibition was repealed there,” Lee states. To that end, Lee is spearheading a petition drive to place a marijuana legalization measure on the ballot in 2010. Furthermore, he is confident that such a measure has an excellent chance of being approved by voters and he just may be right. A recent California Field Poll showed that more than half the people in the state would approve of decriminalizing pot. See, I knew there was a reason I loved Californians. It’s the biggest win-win of all-time, because legalizing the chronic could generate an estimated $1 billion a year in state taxes and weed would instantly become California's No. 1 cash crop. It could even inspire other states to follow suit and in a short time, we could be a nation of stoners. Lee has a kindred spirit in Democratic State Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, who is driving a cannabis legalization bill in the California Assembly. His primary motivation appears to be the tax revenues, which is a) not surprising given him being a politician and b) totally irrelevant. I don’t give a damn why someone supports legalizing pot as long as they support legalizing pot. But what I also love about Ammiano is that he has a grander vision for bringing pot to the masses. “It could be a Walgreens, it could be a hospital, a medical marijuana facility, whatever could be convenient. Adequate enforcement of the rules. Nobody under 21. No driving under the influence,” he explained. I’m choosing to overlook that comment about no one under 21 and strictly enforcing rules, because we all know those things will fall by the wayside anyhow should this bill pass. Those who want tree will get tree whether they are old enough or not. So what does the Gover-nator, Ah-nold Schwarzenegger, think of the idea? Amazingly, he says legalizing marijuana deserves serious consideration. “I think we ought to study very carefully what other countries are doing that have legalized marijuana," Schwarzenegger says. Hmm, so if the governor is on board and there is a legislator willing to introduce the bill, what’s the hang-up? According to Ammiano, legalizing the hippie lettuce is tough because his fellow legislators worry about what the public would think if they publicly supported such a bill. “If we held the vote in the hallway, we'd have it done," Ammiano says. "But people are necessarily cautious. They are up for re-election.” For that reason, he believes there is a much better chance of voters pushing the issue through than there is of their elected representatives getting the job done. Still, Paul Chabot, president of the Coalition for a Drug Free California. This ass-hated square is standing up against this wonderful idea and claiming that promises of economic benefits are pipe dreams. “It's their way of sort of desensitizing our communities, our state and our nation to a drug problem that we clearly need to put our foot down on, and say, 'No more. Enough is enough.'” Sorry Paul, maybe you should try taking that stick out of your ass and saying that again, because I didn’t understand you. Don’t ruin something beautiful with your overly conservative, behind-the-times thinking. You and your views are antiquated and out of touch, period. Embrace that view that most of your fellow Californians have come to accept, namely that herb is not going away and it’s time the state made some money from it………
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Attacking zebras, a magnanimous decision by Nike and the joy of the Lebowski Fest
- How freaking magnanimous of Nike to finally return those tapes of LeBron James getting dunked on by Xavier recruit Jordan Crawford to the two accredited journalists who filmed them. The dunk itself proved to be a huge dud, a decent dunk that was blown up to be much more than what it was precisely because Nike went all Big Brother/censorship and ripped the tapes to begin with so the world wouldn’t see some kid fresh out of high school throwing down on LBJ, er, uh, because of its media guidelines that no pickup games be filmed. Whatever you say, Nike. You can give back the tapes now and issue a lame statement trying to explain away your actions, no one is buying it. "It was never about the play or the player, it was always about our media policy," Nike said. "The interest in the tapes has greatly overshadowed the focus of the camp, which is to help young athletes improve their skills, and that is regrettable. It was Nike's decision to take these tapes based on our media guidelines, which we will continue to enforce." Thanks for taking the time to issue a canned statement lying to us all, we appreciate it. But finally Nike has given the tapes back to their rightful owners, which is an utterly meaningless gesture now that the footage has been leaked to the Internet and we’ve all see Crawford dunking over James during a pickup game at James’ camp in Akron. Nike also did its best to downplay what was on the two tapes, saying only one of the tapes captured the dunk. In the end, it was merely James coming over as a help defender and getting there at the last minute when Crawford was driving to the basket to throw one down. It’s nothing we haven’t seen before in NBA games when other pros have thrown down over the King. As has been accurately observed, had Nike not tried to channel its inner North Korea and enforce unjustified censorship in the first place, this whole thing would have blown over almost instantaneously and would never have become anywhere near as big a deal as it has turned into……
- There have to be some very unhappy fanatical kooks out there right now. How do I know that? Because when I first touched on the case against evangelist Tony Alamo and the multiple felony charges against him a few months ago, I heard from a few of those fanatical kooks. Despite overwhelming evidence that Alamo had indeed done unspeakable things to young girls, those fanatical kooks were adamant that Alamo was a good man and that I was waaaay out of line for daring to rip him. I’ll take your apologies now, fanatical kooks, you know where to find me. Of course, you morons might still believe that your boy T. Alamo is innocent and simply the victim of some vast government conspiracy even after a jury in Arkansas convicted him on Friday of 10 federal counts of taking minors across state lines for sex. Those charges were the reason for the September raid authorities staged on Alamo’s 15-acre compound near Texarkana, Arkansas. Jurors took all of eight hours to deliberate, which I’m guessing included a power nap or five and a few bathroom breaks, because it couldn’t have taken that long to agree that this scumbag was guilty. Each count carries a maximum sentence of 10 years, so let’s just say that Alamo should join Bernie Madoff in having no hope of getting out of prison for the rest of his natural life. That’s exactly what you deserve when between March 1994 and October 2005, you transport five girls younger than 18 across state lines for sex. That cannot be the work God would want from the founder and leader of Tony Alamo Christian Ministries, right? T he case relied heavily on the accounts of three of the girls Alamo was ultimately convicted of sexually assaulting, two of whom were 17 when the complaint was filed last year and one who was 14. All three girls bravely testified that Alamo sexually abused them. Oh, and come to find out that Alamo’s real name is Bernie Hoffman. Bernie Hoffman? What, can’t do God’s work with the name Bernie Hoffman? That’s pretty absurd that an alleged man of God feels that he has to change his name like a Hollywood star in order to get the job done. Perhaps nothing was more haunting during this entire ordeal than Alamo/Hoffman trying to liken himself to Jesus Christ, claims that seem to have -5,000 percent truth to them. Yes, negative 5,000 percent. "Why were they after Jesus," Alamo/Hoffman asked in an interview. "It's the same reason. Jesus is living within me." Yes, but Jesus didn’t sexually assault any young girls and then lie about it, T……...
- Now here’s a festival/convention I can get with. As opposed to all of those pale, basement-dwelling dorks at Comi-Con, the hearty souls who gathered recently just outside Seattle, Washington, for the Lebowski Fest, are my kind of people. When the Coen brothers classic "The Big Lebowski" hit theaters in 1998, it was a critical and box office flop. No one seemed to get the movie or its unique brand of humor, but as it moved to VHS/DVD, the movie found a rabid cult following. Actor Jeff Bridges’ brilliant portrayal of the “The Dude,” a sliding-along slacker who wanted to do little more than bowl, sleep, get high and find the rug that was stolen from his home (“It just tied the room together”) became legendary. The movie became such a cult favorite that it spawned the Lebowski Fest outside of Seattle, where co-founders Scott Shuffitt and Will Russell launched their idea after coming up with it in 2002 while quoting lines from the movie during a slow day selling T-shirts at a tattoo expo in Louisville, Kentucky, where they live. This year, the Seattle Lebowski Fest drew about 200 attendees to watch the movie, bowl, drink the film’s signature white Russians and of course quote their favorite lines from the film. I like this event so much that I’m going to waive my normal rule that it’s unacceptable for adults to dress up like characters from a movie any time other than Halloween. Seeing images of a dozen guys dressed like the Dude or his gun-toting, ‘Nam-flashback-having buddy Walter (player by John Goodman) is freaking hilarious. I am also confident that these guys aren’t going around year-round dressed like this or completely consumed in the world of Lebowski the way Star Wars or Star Trek dorks are engrossed in their little fantasy worlds. "These guys are not the 'Star Trek' fans, they are not the 'Star Wars' fans, they are a different class. They are not the nerds. They are the slackers," said attendee Scott Glancy. Well put, Scotty. "There's a certain community thing that goes on when you hang out and watch your favorite film," said Shuffitt. "When you are watching it with 700 people who love it just as much as you do and everyone's quoting from it, it's just a really nice community." The Lebowski Fest has actually been held 25 times in the United States and overseas since its inception. This year alone, the roving party will visit 15 cities, including Chicago, Illinois, New York and Washington. And what’s the most important lesson to be learned from this? As always, the Dude abides……….
- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! This is a freaking awesome edition of everyone’s favorite watch of social dissidence around the world, if I do say so myself. If giant slingshots are involved, you know it’s good. This edition emanates from Seoul, South Korea, where a group of 500 workers and 200 sympathizers remained holed up at a Ssangyong Motor Co. factory complex. After being canned, the workers took over the complex in suburban Seoul on May 31 and shut down production. They’ve remained entrenched for seven weeks and on Thursday proceeded to use giant slingshots to fire nuts, bolts and other projectiles at police. Are you freaking kidding me? That is….AWESOME! How can you not get with a group of fired workers commandeering their former place of employment, shutting it down and waging an intense war against The Man using giant slingshots to fire nuts and bolts at the police? Sure, Ssangyong Motor Co. has been hit hard by the global recession and letting these workers go was likely a tough decision, but that doesn’t mean the workers can't fight back. This small army actually started the standoff in the main factory but has since been driven to the South Korean auto maker's painting facility on the premises. However, that game them the chance to spray-paint a message on the building that said, "If you are not going to talk, kill us all." Hmm…..dramatic, fatalistic, borderline insane….I like it. I also enjoy the fact that these workers are ignorning the South Korean government’s efforts to persuade many companies and unions to avoid confrontation during the economic downturn. Even though the government pressed companies to use pay freezes, job-sharing and other methods rather than layoffs, Ssangyong Motor Co. decided to do its own thing. Suffering your second-biggest loss ever -- 710 billion won, or about $567 million -- in 2008 can do that to a company. Also, the company is actually owned by Shanghai Automotive Industrial Corp. of China, so there isn’t exactly a strong bond there in terms of national interests. But I digress, because the real story here is these awesome workers who have held off police for nearly two months with makeshift weapons and willpower. When the number of holdouts began to dwindle, they were reinforced by about 200 people from other unions and companies. Even after suffering a setback on Monday when more than 2,000 police in riot gear moved in to the complex and cleared the way for several thousand other workers to restart assembly lines, the fired workers hung tough by finding a new home base in the paint facility. They’ve begun fortifying it and forced police to use metal barricades to shield themselves. Police are hesitant to enter the building by force because it’s filled with flammable liquids and based on their act thus far, these crazies are likely to light something on fire. "We're waiting, for the time being," a police spokesman said Thursday. Go ahead, keep waiting, just as long as that means more giant slingshot and crazy spray-painted messages for the rest of us……..
- Don’t mess with the zebras. It’s true for college football players on the field and it’s obviously true off the field as well. Don’t believe me? Just as Joe Windscheffel, a linebacker/safety for NCAA Division II power Pittsburg State, who will miss the 2009 season after throwing down with a zebra at his summer job. Windscheffel was working on a farm near Lawrence, Kansas for the summer and was told to paint a fence along a pasture line. No big deal, painting a fence in a remote pasture should be a relaxing task and a chance to enjoy the summer sun while getting some work done, right? It would have been if not for the four zebras Windscheffel had to move in order to paint the fence. The three female zebras complied and gave Windscheffel no trouble, but the lone male zebra in the group was having none of it. The animal charged Windscheffel and bit his arm. Not satisfied with the damage it had inflicted, the zebra dragged the 6-foot-2, 225-pound man until two fellow farmhands came to his aid. The incident left Windscheffel with a compound fracture that is likely to sideline him for the upcoming season. "You only see zebras on television getting eaten by lions, but they are stronger than they look," Windscheffel said. "It was just a freak deal." A freak deal and a valuable life lesson for us all, my man. I do wonder what the heck zebras were doing in Kansas. Seriously, was this Kansas or were you painting a fence in the Serengeti? This is why I avoid working with wildlife if at all possible……..
- There have to be some very unhappy fanatical kooks out there right now. How do I know that? Because when I first touched on the case against evangelist Tony Alamo and the multiple felony charges against him a few months ago, I heard from a few of those fanatical kooks. Despite overwhelming evidence that Alamo had indeed done unspeakable things to young girls, those fanatical kooks were adamant that Alamo was a good man and that I was waaaay out of line for daring to rip him. I’ll take your apologies now, fanatical kooks, you know where to find me. Of course, you morons might still believe that your boy T. Alamo is innocent and simply the victim of some vast government conspiracy even after a jury in Arkansas convicted him on Friday of 10 federal counts of taking minors across state lines for sex. Those charges were the reason for the September raid authorities staged on Alamo’s 15-acre compound near Texarkana, Arkansas. Jurors took all of eight hours to deliberate, which I’m guessing included a power nap or five and a few bathroom breaks, because it couldn’t have taken that long to agree that this scumbag was guilty. Each count carries a maximum sentence of 10 years, so let’s just say that Alamo should join Bernie Madoff in having no hope of getting out of prison for the rest of his natural life. That’s exactly what you deserve when between March 1994 and October 2005, you transport five girls younger than 18 across state lines for sex. That cannot be the work God would want from the founder and leader of Tony Alamo Christian Ministries, right? T he case relied heavily on the accounts of three of the girls Alamo was ultimately convicted of sexually assaulting, two of whom were 17 when the complaint was filed last year and one who was 14. All three girls bravely testified that Alamo sexually abused them. Oh, and come to find out that Alamo’s real name is Bernie Hoffman. Bernie Hoffman? What, can’t do God’s work with the name Bernie Hoffman? That’s pretty absurd that an alleged man of God feels that he has to change his name like a Hollywood star in order to get the job done. Perhaps nothing was more haunting during this entire ordeal than Alamo/Hoffman trying to liken himself to Jesus Christ, claims that seem to have -5,000 percent truth to them. Yes, negative 5,000 percent. "Why were they after Jesus," Alamo/Hoffman asked in an interview. "It's the same reason. Jesus is living within me." Yes, but Jesus didn’t sexually assault any young girls and then lie about it, T……...
- Now here’s a festival/convention I can get with. As opposed to all of those pale, basement-dwelling dorks at Comi-Con, the hearty souls who gathered recently just outside Seattle, Washington, for the Lebowski Fest, are my kind of people. When the Coen brothers classic "The Big Lebowski" hit theaters in 1998, it was a critical and box office flop. No one seemed to get the movie or its unique brand of humor, but as it moved to VHS/DVD, the movie found a rabid cult following. Actor Jeff Bridges’ brilliant portrayal of the “The Dude,” a sliding-along slacker who wanted to do little more than bowl, sleep, get high and find the rug that was stolen from his home (“It just tied the room together”) became legendary. The movie became such a cult favorite that it spawned the Lebowski Fest outside of Seattle, where co-founders Scott Shuffitt and Will Russell launched their idea after coming up with it in 2002 while quoting lines from the movie during a slow day selling T-shirts at a tattoo expo in Louisville, Kentucky, where they live. This year, the Seattle Lebowski Fest drew about 200 attendees to watch the movie, bowl, drink the film’s signature white Russians and of course quote their favorite lines from the film. I like this event so much that I’m going to waive my normal rule that it’s unacceptable for adults to dress up like characters from a movie any time other than Halloween. Seeing images of a dozen guys dressed like the Dude or his gun-toting, ‘Nam-flashback-having buddy Walter (player by John Goodman) is freaking hilarious. I am also confident that these guys aren’t going around year-round dressed like this or completely consumed in the world of Lebowski the way Star Wars or Star Trek dorks are engrossed in their little fantasy worlds. "These guys are not the 'Star Trek' fans, they are not the 'Star Wars' fans, they are a different class. They are not the nerds. They are the slackers," said attendee Scott Glancy. Well put, Scotty. "There's a certain community thing that goes on when you hang out and watch your favorite film," said Shuffitt. "When you are watching it with 700 people who love it just as much as you do and everyone's quoting from it, it's just a really nice community." The Lebowski Fest has actually been held 25 times in the United States and overseas since its inception. This year alone, the roving party will visit 15 cities, including Chicago, Illinois, New York and Washington. And what’s the most important lesson to be learned from this? As always, the Dude abides……….
- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! This is a freaking awesome edition of everyone’s favorite watch of social dissidence around the world, if I do say so myself. If giant slingshots are involved, you know it’s good. This edition emanates from Seoul, South Korea, where a group of 500 workers and 200 sympathizers remained holed up at a Ssangyong Motor Co. factory complex. After being canned, the workers took over the complex in suburban Seoul on May 31 and shut down production. They’ve remained entrenched for seven weeks and on Thursday proceeded to use giant slingshots to fire nuts, bolts and other projectiles at police. Are you freaking kidding me? That is….AWESOME! How can you not get with a group of fired workers commandeering their former place of employment, shutting it down and waging an intense war against The Man using giant slingshots to fire nuts and bolts at the police? Sure, Ssangyong Motor Co. has been hit hard by the global recession and letting these workers go was likely a tough decision, but that doesn’t mean the workers can't fight back. This small army actually started the standoff in the main factory but has since been driven to the South Korean auto maker's painting facility on the premises. However, that game them the chance to spray-paint a message on the building that said, "If you are not going to talk, kill us all." Hmm…..dramatic, fatalistic, borderline insane….I like it. I also enjoy the fact that these workers are ignorning the South Korean government’s efforts to persuade many companies and unions to avoid confrontation during the economic downturn. Even though the government pressed companies to use pay freezes, job-sharing and other methods rather than layoffs, Ssangyong Motor Co. decided to do its own thing. Suffering your second-biggest loss ever -- 710 billion won, or about $567 million -- in 2008 can do that to a company. Also, the company is actually owned by Shanghai Automotive Industrial Corp. of China, so there isn’t exactly a strong bond there in terms of national interests. But I digress, because the real story here is these awesome workers who have held off police for nearly two months with makeshift weapons and willpower. When the number of holdouts began to dwindle, they were reinforced by about 200 people from other unions and companies. Even after suffering a setback on Monday when more than 2,000 police in riot gear moved in to the complex and cleared the way for several thousand other workers to restart assembly lines, the fired workers hung tough by finding a new home base in the paint facility. They’ve begun fortifying it and forced police to use metal barricades to shield themselves. Police are hesitant to enter the building by force because it’s filled with flammable liquids and based on their act thus far, these crazies are likely to light something on fire. "We're waiting, for the time being," a police spokesman said Thursday. Go ahead, keep waiting, just as long as that means more giant slingshot and crazy spray-painted messages for the rest of us……..
- Don’t mess with the zebras. It’s true for college football players on the field and it’s obviously true off the field as well. Don’t believe me? Just as Joe Windscheffel, a linebacker/safety for NCAA Division II power Pittsburg State, who will miss the 2009 season after throwing down with a zebra at his summer job. Windscheffel was working on a farm near Lawrence, Kansas for the summer and was told to paint a fence along a pasture line. No big deal, painting a fence in a remote pasture should be a relaxing task and a chance to enjoy the summer sun while getting some work done, right? It would have been if not for the four zebras Windscheffel had to move in order to paint the fence. The three female zebras complied and gave Windscheffel no trouble, but the lone male zebra in the group was having none of it. The animal charged Windscheffel and bit his arm. Not satisfied with the damage it had inflicted, the zebra dragged the 6-foot-2, 225-pound man until two fellow farmhands came to his aid. The incident left Windscheffel with a compound fracture that is likely to sideline him for the upcoming season. "You only see zebras on television getting eaten by lions, but they are stronger than they look," Windscheffel said. "It was just a freak deal." A freak deal and a valuable life lesson for us all, my man. I do wonder what the heck zebras were doing in Kansas. Seriously, was this Kansas or were you painting a fence in the Serengeti? This is why I avoid working with wildlife if at all possible……..
Friday, July 24, 2009
Places with 16-year-old strippers, major corruption in New Jersey and the monster that is the NFL draft grows again
- Doesn’t the sight of clergy, elected officials and civil servants collaborating and cooperating to launder hundreds of thousands of dollars in stolen money just warm your heart? What a sight is unfolding in New Jersey, where at least three New Jersey mayors, other public officials and five rabbis were among 44 people arrested Thursday in a federal investigation of public corruption and money laundering. Included in that tally were luminaries such as Hoboken Mayor Peter Cammarano III and New Jersey Assembly members Daniel Van Pelt and L. Harvey Smith. Other sleazy, integrity-free individuals included in the sting were Secaucus, New Jersey, Mayor Dennis Elwell, Ridgefield, New Jersey, Mayor Anthony Suarez and Jersey City Deputy Mayor Leona Beldini, representing the ladies. But what would a story like this be without a little involvement from the clergy? As it turns out, five rabbis, were also in on the indictment party. Included in those 44 arrests was the national leader of the Syrian Jewish community and four fellow Jewish leaders accused of laundering more than $3 million. This is just a crazy story, with all sorts of dirty money flying and flowing around. A total of $650,000 in bribes were paid to New Jersey public officials and one man was charged with conspiring to broker the sale of a human kidney for transplant for the handsome price of $160,000. Levy Izhak Rosenbaum of Brooklyn is the kind soul who allegedly offered to obtain a kidney for an undercover FBI agent for that $160,000 fee. All told, investigators searched about 20 locations in New Jersey and New York to recover "large sums of cash and other evidence of criminal conduct.” They also executed 28 seizure warrants against bank accounts for individuals they believed to be a part of the conspiracy. Cammarano was clearly a greedy S.O.B., allegedly accepting $35,000 in bribes from a government witness posing as a real estate developer. Other officials allegedly took bribes "to help get approvals from high-level state agency officials for building projects,” which is always a solid way to get things done. Those bribes were then labeled as “consulting fees” in order to sanitize them and make them appear slightly less criminal. Oddly enough, New Jersey Gov. Jon Corzine seemed upset by the arrests and said in a statement: "Any corruption is unacceptable -- anywhere, anytime, by anybody. The scale of corruption we're seeing as this unfolds is simply outrageous and cannot be tolerated." Somebody’s a tad cranky today, eh? But that’s the sort of thing that will happen when the FBI conducts a large-scale operation over the course of three years into rampant corruption. Personally I like the incorporation of individuals from a wide range of fields and professions into corruption of this scale, so there’s something positive to take from this tale after all……..
- Are you a huge fan of The Simpsons? If your answer is the same as mine - namely, no - then this may not be of much interest to you. If you are a fan, you might be interested to know that an open casting call for The Simpsons 20th Anniversary Special — In 3-D! On Ice! will be held tomorrow at Comic-Con in San Diego. Filmmaker Morgan Spurlock (Supersize Me), who will direct the anniversary special, is looking for some of the show’s more gung-ho fans to drop in and try to earn a spot on the show. "I hope we find some of the most incredible super-fans that the world has ever seen," Spurlock said. Be careful what you ask for M., because I have a feeling some really bizarre, scary freaks are going to be heading your way. Ironically, the show, which will air in January, will be neither in 3-D nor on ice. What it will be is a chance for an über-fan or two to live their dream of being a part of one of the longest-running shows on television. "Maybe there's people who want to tell stories about how it changed their life...but we hope we get great people who have great stories to tell,” Spurlock added. How an animated show with low-rent humor changed their life? Now that I would have to hear. So how to go about preparing for the auditions if you’re planning on going? Spurlock suggests dressing up like a favorite Simpsons character, or transforming yourself into some sort of "billboard" for the show. Other than that, plan on showing up really early and camping out with the rest of the losers at the Marriot Hotel & Marina in San Diego. The casting call kicks off 10 a.m. EST and ends that night at 8. Best of success to anyone planning on going, I have a feeling you’ll be in for a long day…….
- Great, this is just what we needed. Already the NFL draft was a two-day monstrosity consuming the better part of 36 hours on the second-to-last weekend in April. The draft has become an increasing target for criticism and mocking among those who argue that it has become a bloated, oversized festival of excess that drags on and on fueled largely by filler content and wasting of time. With that in mind, I can only imagine what the reaction will be now that the league has expanded the event from two to three days. Commissioner Roger Goodell has notified teams that the draft will bloat to three days in 2010, starting at 7:30 p.m. ET on Thursday, April 22 and running late into the day on Saturday, April 24. “We continue to look for ways to make the draft more accessible to more fans," Goodell said in a statement. "Moving the first round to prime time on Thursday night will make the first round of the draft available to fans on what is typically the most-watched night of television.” Either that or you’re looking to expand the league’s presence by another day and take up even more of the sports calendar than you already do. I’m not saying it’s wrong from a business standpoint, I’m simply saying it’s tending toward excess. I’m a huge football fan and watch a lot of NFL action, but three days is just going too far. Yes, ESPN and the NFL Network will televise the event from start to finish as they always do, but just because someone will televise it doesn’t mean you should do it. The first day of the draft will consist only of the first round, with second and third rounds starting at 6:30 p.m. ET on April 23 and rounds 4 through 7 starting at 10 a.m. ET on April 24. But you can see where the NFL, feeling its oats after a total of 39 million viewers watched the draft this year, thought this was a good idea. This is the third major format change to the draft in the past 16 years, as the NFL held its draft on Sunday-Monday two-day blocks from 1988 to 1994 and changed it to a Saturday-Sunday event from 1995 to 2009. Next step after this? How’s about a whole week of draft madness, one round per day? It’s only a matter of time…….
- Caravan time! Although I’m upset that no one invited me to join, but I’ll overlook that and enjoy the attempted return of deposed Honduran President Jose Manuel Zelaya to the country he was elected to govern. Zelaya climbed into a sport utility vehicle yesterday and kicked off his journey from Managua, Nicaragua, to the country's border with Honduras. Joined by a caravan of supporters and reporters, Zelaya headed north to the city of Esteli, close to the Honduran border. His plan is to stop there, finalize his border-crossing plans and then do some border crashing. The actual plan to return to Honduras was announced earlier this week, but observers on both sides of the current crisis in Honduras worry that Zelaya going home could spark off more unrest. U.S. Assistant Secretary of State Philip Crowley said, “Any step that would add to the risk of violence in Honduras or in the area, we think would be unwise.” He already attempted a return via air on July 5 and found the Honduran military waiting on the runway to block him from getting off the plane. Nearly a month has passed since the June 28 military-led coup that deposed Zelaya, but tensions are clearly as high as ever. Regular demonstrations by both sides in the debate have taken place across the country since the coup. Some demonstrators have marched in support of interim President Roberto Micheletti, but the majority of them have backed Zelaya. Asked about the reception he expects to receive at the border, Zelaya optimistically declared that he hopes border guards in Honduras will recognize him as president and commander in chief and allow him to cross. "We go with a white flag, with a flag of peace," Zelaya said. In response to Zelaya’s attempted return, Micheletti's government renewed its pledge to arrest Zelaya on charges of violating the constitution and announced a curfew in the border area with Nicaragua from 6 p.m. to 6 a.m. Meanwhile, Costa Rican President Oscar Arias continues his attempts to play peacemaker in the conflict. Arias has presided over two rounds of unsuccessful talks between the two sides and offered a peace agreement Wednesday called the San Jose Accord. The agreement calls for Zelaya's return to power, the creation of a unity government, and early elections. Don’t expect Micheletti’s governent to accept it, but it’s a nice thought anyhow. Also, don’t expect the Honduran supreme court to roll out much of a welcome mat for Zelaya. The court has gone on the record as saying it would not accept Zelaya's return under any circumstances. Outside forces like the United States and the Organization of American States continue to push for both sides to sign the San Jose accord, but their wishes don’t carry much weight here. All of this because the guy wanted to give voters a chance to decide on extending term limits and keeping him in office longer………..
- Learning about obscure state laws that allow or prohibit random actions, behaviors or practices is always a fun exercise. Whether it’s your town that has a law banning more than three lawn gnomes five inches tall or taller or someone else’s town, these laws are always good for a laugh. Maybe not so much in Rhode Island, which may be the smallest state in the union but is leading the way with one unique, controversial law. This week, the Providence Journal revealed a loophole in state law allowing minors to work as strippers as long as they are home by 11:30 p.m. Yes, 16 year olds can take it off for the sleazy, greasy losers at their local strip joint as long as they don’t stay out too late. In fact, Rhode Island has no laws on the books to stop teenagers as young as 16 from going so far as to work as "indoor hookers,” whatever that means. No one would have even been aware of this law if not for a case involving a 16-year-old runaway who had been working at a strip club in Providence. Police investigating the case finally found the girl but found they could not prosecute because there were no local or state laws to stop teens from working in the adult entertainment business. When Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts heard about this, she was curiously upset. She lamented the lack of such laws in her state "mind-boggling." What’s your beef, Liz? So some high school sophomore wants to peel off her clothes, put on translucent high heels and work a greasy brass pole while 40-something stockbrokers shove $1 bills down her G-string. Kids want to earn money so they can buy a car, get that cute pair of jeans at the mall or buy the latest Jonas Brothers album. If these girls want to make that money in the most disgusting, depressing, deplorable and unsanitary places to work, who are you to stop them? And so what if most states around the country have a minimum age requirement that prohibiting minors from entering strip clubs? Don’t be a follower, I always say, be a leader………..
- Are you a huge fan of The Simpsons? If your answer is the same as mine - namely, no - then this may not be of much interest to you. If you are a fan, you might be interested to know that an open casting call for The Simpsons 20th Anniversary Special — In 3-D! On Ice! will be held tomorrow at Comic-Con in San Diego. Filmmaker Morgan Spurlock (Supersize Me), who will direct the anniversary special, is looking for some of the show’s more gung-ho fans to drop in and try to earn a spot on the show. "I hope we find some of the most incredible super-fans that the world has ever seen," Spurlock said. Be careful what you ask for M., because I have a feeling some really bizarre, scary freaks are going to be heading your way. Ironically, the show, which will air in January, will be neither in 3-D nor on ice. What it will be is a chance for an über-fan or two to live their dream of being a part of one of the longest-running shows on television. "Maybe there's people who want to tell stories about how it changed their life...but we hope we get great people who have great stories to tell,” Spurlock added. How an animated show with low-rent humor changed their life? Now that I would have to hear. So how to go about preparing for the auditions if you’re planning on going? Spurlock suggests dressing up like a favorite Simpsons character, or transforming yourself into some sort of "billboard" for the show. Other than that, plan on showing up really early and camping out with the rest of the losers at the Marriot Hotel & Marina in San Diego. The casting call kicks off 10 a.m. EST and ends that night at 8. Best of success to anyone planning on going, I have a feeling you’ll be in for a long day…….
- Great, this is just what we needed. Already the NFL draft was a two-day monstrosity consuming the better part of 36 hours on the second-to-last weekend in April. The draft has become an increasing target for criticism and mocking among those who argue that it has become a bloated, oversized festival of excess that drags on and on fueled largely by filler content and wasting of time. With that in mind, I can only imagine what the reaction will be now that the league has expanded the event from two to three days. Commissioner Roger Goodell has notified teams that the draft will bloat to three days in 2010, starting at 7:30 p.m. ET on Thursday, April 22 and running late into the day on Saturday, April 24. “We continue to look for ways to make the draft more accessible to more fans," Goodell said in a statement. "Moving the first round to prime time on Thursday night will make the first round of the draft available to fans on what is typically the most-watched night of television.” Either that or you’re looking to expand the league’s presence by another day and take up even more of the sports calendar than you already do. I’m not saying it’s wrong from a business standpoint, I’m simply saying it’s tending toward excess. I’m a huge football fan and watch a lot of NFL action, but three days is just going too far. Yes, ESPN and the NFL Network will televise the event from start to finish as they always do, but just because someone will televise it doesn’t mean you should do it. The first day of the draft will consist only of the first round, with second and third rounds starting at 6:30 p.m. ET on April 23 and rounds 4 through 7 starting at 10 a.m. ET on April 24. But you can see where the NFL, feeling its oats after a total of 39 million viewers watched the draft this year, thought this was a good idea. This is the third major format change to the draft in the past 16 years, as the NFL held its draft on Sunday-Monday two-day blocks from 1988 to 1994 and changed it to a Saturday-Sunday event from 1995 to 2009. Next step after this? How’s about a whole week of draft madness, one round per day? It’s only a matter of time…….
- Caravan time! Although I’m upset that no one invited me to join, but I’ll overlook that and enjoy the attempted return of deposed Honduran President Jose Manuel Zelaya to the country he was elected to govern. Zelaya climbed into a sport utility vehicle yesterday and kicked off his journey from Managua, Nicaragua, to the country's border with Honduras. Joined by a caravan of supporters and reporters, Zelaya headed north to the city of Esteli, close to the Honduran border. His plan is to stop there, finalize his border-crossing plans and then do some border crashing. The actual plan to return to Honduras was announced earlier this week, but observers on both sides of the current crisis in Honduras worry that Zelaya going home could spark off more unrest. U.S. Assistant Secretary of State Philip Crowley said, “Any step that would add to the risk of violence in Honduras or in the area, we think would be unwise.” He already attempted a return via air on July 5 and found the Honduran military waiting on the runway to block him from getting off the plane. Nearly a month has passed since the June 28 military-led coup that deposed Zelaya, but tensions are clearly as high as ever. Regular demonstrations by both sides in the debate have taken place across the country since the coup. Some demonstrators have marched in support of interim President Roberto Micheletti, but the majority of them have backed Zelaya. Asked about the reception he expects to receive at the border, Zelaya optimistically declared that he hopes border guards in Honduras will recognize him as president and commander in chief and allow him to cross. "We go with a white flag, with a flag of peace," Zelaya said. In response to Zelaya’s attempted return, Micheletti's government renewed its pledge to arrest Zelaya on charges of violating the constitution and announced a curfew in the border area with Nicaragua from 6 p.m. to 6 a.m. Meanwhile, Costa Rican President Oscar Arias continues his attempts to play peacemaker in the conflict. Arias has presided over two rounds of unsuccessful talks between the two sides and offered a peace agreement Wednesday called the San Jose Accord. The agreement calls for Zelaya's return to power, the creation of a unity government, and early elections. Don’t expect Micheletti’s governent to accept it, but it’s a nice thought anyhow. Also, don’t expect the Honduran supreme court to roll out much of a welcome mat for Zelaya. The court has gone on the record as saying it would not accept Zelaya's return under any circumstances. Outside forces like the United States and the Organization of American States continue to push for both sides to sign the San Jose accord, but their wishes don’t carry much weight here. All of this because the guy wanted to give voters a chance to decide on extending term limits and keeping him in office longer………..
- Learning about obscure state laws that allow or prohibit random actions, behaviors or practices is always a fun exercise. Whether it’s your town that has a law banning more than three lawn gnomes five inches tall or taller or someone else’s town, these laws are always good for a laugh. Maybe not so much in Rhode Island, which may be the smallest state in the union but is leading the way with one unique, controversial law. This week, the Providence Journal revealed a loophole in state law allowing minors to work as strippers as long as they are home by 11:30 p.m. Yes, 16 year olds can take it off for the sleazy, greasy losers at their local strip joint as long as they don’t stay out too late. In fact, Rhode Island has no laws on the books to stop teenagers as young as 16 from going so far as to work as "indoor hookers,” whatever that means. No one would have even been aware of this law if not for a case involving a 16-year-old runaway who had been working at a strip club in Providence. Police investigating the case finally found the girl but found they could not prosecute because there were no local or state laws to stop teens from working in the adult entertainment business. When Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts heard about this, she was curiously upset. She lamented the lack of such laws in her state "mind-boggling." What’s your beef, Liz? So some high school sophomore wants to peel off her clothes, put on translucent high heels and work a greasy brass pole while 40-something stockbrokers shove $1 bills down her G-string. Kids want to earn money so they can buy a car, get that cute pair of jeans at the mall or buy the latest Jonas Brothers album. If these girls want to make that money in the most disgusting, depressing, deplorable and unsanitary places to work, who are you to stop them? And so what if most states around the country have a minimum age requirement that prohibiting minors from entering strip clubs? Don’t be a follower, I always say, be a leader………..
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Bad news for Big Ben, Microsoft's latest lame version of Windows and Jay-Z's 2009 U.S. festival debut
- This may not have been what the defending world champions had in mind as they prepare to open training camp. Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger finds himself in the crosshairs of a nasty lawsuit by a woman who claims he raped her at a Lake Tahoe hotel-casino a year ago. Although the woman never filed a criminal complaint, she’s suing Big Ben after he supposedly assaulted her during a celebrity golf tournament last July while she was working as an executive VIP casino host. The alleged incident took place at Harrah's Lake Tahoe, where the woman claims the Super Bowl winning quarterback raped her in a hotel penthouse across the street from the golf course. To be fair to Roethlisberger, his attorney maintains that he has never sexually assaulted anyone. Additionally, law enforcement officials in Nevada have no intention of opening a criminal investigation into the allegations because the victim is the only one who can initiate that by filing a criminal complaint. What she has done is file this lawsuit that alleges Harrah's officials, including the casino's chief of security, staged a cover-up of the incident after she reported it to him the next day. The woman, unidentified for obvious reasons, is a native of Canada who had worked at Harrah's Lake Tahoe hotel-casino since 2003. Roethlisberger’s attorney questioned why she would wait nearly a year to file a lawsuit and it’s a fair question, but her contention, at least as far as not filing a criminal complaint, is that she feared the casino would side with Roethlisberger because of his friendship with the hotel-casino's regional president John Koster and she’d be fired. Furthermore, she claims that Harrah’s security chief, Guy Hyder, told her she was "overreacting," that "most girls would feel lucky to get to have sex with someone like Ben Roethlisberger" and that "Koster would love you even more if he knew about this.” I certainly hope that’s not true, because if it is then it’s one of the most reprehensible things anyone has ever said. Also included in the lawsuit are claims that this woman was treated for depression and anxiety stemming from the alleged assault at five different hospitals between last August and December. A trigger for the suit may have been this woman’s claim that Harrah's officials told her Roethlisberger was invited to play in the 2009 celebrity golf tournament and ordered her to take a paid two-week leave during the event, the lawsuit said, "to accommodate her assailant." None of the involved parties will comment on the lawsuit for obvious reasons, but what is known is that it seeks a minimum of $440,000 in damages from Roethlisberger, at least $50,000 in damages from eight Harrah's officials and an unspecified amount of punitive damages "sufficient to deter" Roethlisberger and the others "from engaging in such conduct in the future.” At this point it’s not clear how much truth are in these allegations, but at this point I’m rooting for there to be none because at least it’s better than the alternative, that Roethlisberger is another scumbag athlete who assaults women………
- Depending where you fall on the political spectrum, news that Mexican immigration to the United States has dropped sharply since 2005 is either the best news ever or not-so-great news. But according to a study released Wednesday by mis amigos at the Pew Hispanic Center, immigration from Mexico to the United States slowed at least 40 percent between 2005 and 2008. The study is based on national population surveys in the United States and Mexico, as well as Border Patrol apprehension figures. According to data from the Mexican side of the border, some 1 million Mexicans left for the United States in a 12-month period beginning in 2006. A mere three years later, that number decreased to 636,000. “The size of the drop has been quite remarkable in such a small span of time,” Jeffrey Passel, senior demographer at the Pew Hispanic Center and author of the study, declared. And why are less people looking to crash the border these days? Well, as with all happenings in this day and age in this country, it’s like because of the economy. Yes, the economy here is so bad that even poor-ass Mexicans don’t want to come to the United States. Increased border patrols could also be a factor, but I kinda doubt it. With the decreasing numbers of Mexicans entering the U.S. and the number exiting remaining relatively steady, dropping to only 433,000 between 2008 and 2009, a small drop from the 479,000 who returned three years earlier. Personally I’ve always found our Mexican visitors to be affable, hard-working and a welcome addition to this country, but I realize that not everyone feels that way. Some of you are small-minded, anti-immigration cultural imperialists who would like nothing better than to erect that 100-foot-tall security fence around the entire country that our last president, that ass hat W., was all for. Decide for yourself whether this trend of Mexicans crossing our border in smaller numbers is good or bad, but ponder carefully………
- All hail, all hail! Microsoft has finished off the code for the latest version of its subpar operating system and all is good to go for the October 22 launch of Windows 7. With the final hurdle cleared, Windows 7 will hit retail shelves and new PCs on time, which is good news for exactly no one. For some odd reason Microsoft is hoping that this latest incarnation of its troubled OS will miraculously not suck and give users a never-ending supply of infuriating problems as they try to use it. The last installment of Windows, Windows Vista, bombed out so quickly that users rushed to downgrade back to whichever other crappy version of windows they were using before Vista hit the market in January 2007. Microsoft is claiming that Windows 7 has been receiving positive feedback along the way and hitting all of its deadlines too. “That is our final engineering milestone in what has been a three-year journey,” said Mike Angiulo, general manager for planning in the Windows unit. What should concern users is that Windows 7 relies on most of the same basic platforms as Vista and simply adds features to it. Beta testing has allegedly shown that Windows 7 is much more appealing visually than Vista and that the new taskbar is much more user-friendly. Perhaps the most dubious claim is that it boots up and shuts down faster and is less prone to freeze and crash - uh huh, sure. All in all, Windows 7 hasn’t changed much since it was presented in October at a developer’s conference. Microsoft plans to offer Windows 7 in several different shades of crappy, from low-end "starter edition" to an ultra-high-end "ultimate version." In what has been a rough, rugged year for the economy and specifically for the technology market, Microsoft and retailers are hoping that Windows 7 will provide a needed boost to the system. To put it differently, they are building their house on a foundation of sand with walls made of toilet paper as a hurricane, earthquake and tsunami bear down on it. "Our customers are very excited about Windows 7," Dell's Jim Ginger said. "We know because they tell us." In other words, don’t believe a word anyone from Dell says, because they are either liars, morons or both. I look forward to hearing stories of how you are grossly disappointing everyone very soon, Windows 7……….
- If you’re looking to see the best rapper in the game make his 2009 U.S. festival debut, this is for you. Jay-Z will make his first U.S. festival appearance at the 2009 All Points West Music & Arts Festival, to be held July 31-Aug. 2 at Liberty State Park in New Jersey. He’ll be taking the spot vacated by the festival’s previous opening night headliner, the Beastie Boys, who had to pull out because member Adam "MCA" Yauch was recently diagnosed with cancer and will undergo surgery. It’s definitely a sad story for a group that has been a hip-hop pioneer for so long and I definitely want to send out thoughts and prayers to Yauch for a successful surgery and full recovery. Beastie Boys were also forced to cancel other summer tour dates and delayed the release of its forthcoming album, "Hot Sauce Committee Part 1." In a classy move, All Points West organizers are offering refunds at point of purchase for July 31 single-day tickets for anyone who was going mainly to see Beastie Boys. However, I can't imagine how anyone would want a refund when they had a chance to see a legendary artist like Jay-Z live. Last year, he appeared as a headliner at the Pemberton Festival in Pemberton, British Columbia. This year, he’ll be leading off a pretty solid festival lineup that will include personal favorites like Coldplay, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Vampire Weekend, Echo & The Bunnymen, MGMT, , the Black Keys, Fleet Foxes, Neko Case, the Ting Tings, the National, Silversun Pickups and Arctic Monkeys. The festival takes place just across the Hudson River from lower Manhattan. so you can attend and not be that far from all the action and excitement of NYC. With the lineup I just mentioned, I’d definitely recommend it………
- Now this is what I like to see: cities telling people to stop doing annoying, useless things like trying to help the homeless. No one wants, needs or appreciates people trying to do nice things for the down and out, I feel confident in saying. So props to the city of Phoenix for telling a local church they are no longer allowed to hold a Saturday service on their lawn during which they feed the homeless. What the congregation and leadership of Crossroads United Methodist Church was thinking when they began holding the Saturday events in January, I’ll never know. Seriously, having homeless people come for a worship service on your lawn and feeding them breakfast is pretty reprehensible. Seeing these poor vagrants walk, bike or take the bus all the way across town just for a free meal and some love from the CUMC congregation is a sign of what’s wrong with our society, no doubt. “We have been feeding the homeless since (the church) began. It’s part of the mission of the church. It’s part of who we are,” said Dottie Escobedo-Frank, pastor at the church. “This is our mission. This is who we are. This is what we do.” Not anymore, it’s not. The city of Phoenix has stepped in and told the church to cease and desist after residents from a neighborhood across the street complained about the event, specifically the noise and the trash that result from it. Because the church is in a residential zone, it cannot operate and sort of charity dining hall. To operate such a facility, a group or organization must be in a commercial or industrial zone. But the city did give the church a nice two-week grace period, allowing them to feed the homeless for the next two Saturdays before shutting it down. The church isn’t laying down and giving up, though; Escobedo-Frank maintains that CUMC is a church first, not a charity dining hall, so the ordinance does not apply to them. “You can’t tell us we’re something that we’re not,” Escobedo-Frank said. “Our argument is that we are not a charity dining hall, so they are defining us incorrectly.” Led by their pastor, the church has appealed the city’s decision. Should the city deny that appeal, the church may also attempt to have the ordinance amended to allow their service/breakfast or move the event to a different location. Personally I’m applauding the city for shutting down this offensive effort, because no one needs to see a church or any other group trying to help downtrodden, oft-overlooked people by feeding them……
- Depending where you fall on the political spectrum, news that Mexican immigration to the United States has dropped sharply since 2005 is either the best news ever or not-so-great news. But according to a study released Wednesday by mis amigos at the Pew Hispanic Center, immigration from Mexico to the United States slowed at least 40 percent between 2005 and 2008. The study is based on national population surveys in the United States and Mexico, as well as Border Patrol apprehension figures. According to data from the Mexican side of the border, some 1 million Mexicans left for the United States in a 12-month period beginning in 2006. A mere three years later, that number decreased to 636,000. “The size of the drop has been quite remarkable in such a small span of time,” Jeffrey Passel, senior demographer at the Pew Hispanic Center and author of the study, declared. And why are less people looking to crash the border these days? Well, as with all happenings in this day and age in this country, it’s like because of the economy. Yes, the economy here is so bad that even poor-ass Mexicans don’t want to come to the United States. Increased border patrols could also be a factor, but I kinda doubt it. With the decreasing numbers of Mexicans entering the U.S. and the number exiting remaining relatively steady, dropping to only 433,000 between 2008 and 2009, a small drop from the 479,000 who returned three years earlier. Personally I’ve always found our Mexican visitors to be affable, hard-working and a welcome addition to this country, but I realize that not everyone feels that way. Some of you are small-minded, anti-immigration cultural imperialists who would like nothing better than to erect that 100-foot-tall security fence around the entire country that our last president, that ass hat W., was all for. Decide for yourself whether this trend of Mexicans crossing our border in smaller numbers is good or bad, but ponder carefully………
- All hail, all hail! Microsoft has finished off the code for the latest version of its subpar operating system and all is good to go for the October 22 launch of Windows 7. With the final hurdle cleared, Windows 7 will hit retail shelves and new PCs on time, which is good news for exactly no one. For some odd reason Microsoft is hoping that this latest incarnation of its troubled OS will miraculously not suck and give users a never-ending supply of infuriating problems as they try to use it. The last installment of Windows, Windows Vista, bombed out so quickly that users rushed to downgrade back to whichever other crappy version of windows they were using before Vista hit the market in January 2007. Microsoft is claiming that Windows 7 has been receiving positive feedback along the way and hitting all of its deadlines too. “That is our final engineering milestone in what has been a three-year journey,” said Mike Angiulo, general manager for planning in the Windows unit. What should concern users is that Windows 7 relies on most of the same basic platforms as Vista and simply adds features to it. Beta testing has allegedly shown that Windows 7 is much more appealing visually than Vista and that the new taskbar is much more user-friendly. Perhaps the most dubious claim is that it boots up and shuts down faster and is less prone to freeze and crash - uh huh, sure. All in all, Windows 7 hasn’t changed much since it was presented in October at a developer’s conference. Microsoft plans to offer Windows 7 in several different shades of crappy, from low-end "starter edition" to an ultra-high-end "ultimate version." In what has been a rough, rugged year for the economy and specifically for the technology market, Microsoft and retailers are hoping that Windows 7 will provide a needed boost to the system. To put it differently, they are building their house on a foundation of sand with walls made of toilet paper as a hurricane, earthquake and tsunami bear down on it. "Our customers are very excited about Windows 7," Dell's Jim Ginger said. "We know because they tell us." In other words, don’t believe a word anyone from Dell says, because they are either liars, morons or both. I look forward to hearing stories of how you are grossly disappointing everyone very soon, Windows 7……….
- If you’re looking to see the best rapper in the game make his 2009 U.S. festival debut, this is for you. Jay-Z will make his first U.S. festival appearance at the 2009 All Points West Music & Arts Festival, to be held July 31-Aug. 2 at Liberty State Park in New Jersey. He’ll be taking the spot vacated by the festival’s previous opening night headliner, the Beastie Boys, who had to pull out because member Adam "MCA" Yauch was recently diagnosed with cancer and will undergo surgery. It’s definitely a sad story for a group that has been a hip-hop pioneer for so long and I definitely want to send out thoughts and prayers to Yauch for a successful surgery and full recovery. Beastie Boys were also forced to cancel other summer tour dates and delayed the release of its forthcoming album, "Hot Sauce Committee Part 1." In a classy move, All Points West organizers are offering refunds at point of purchase for July 31 single-day tickets for anyone who was going mainly to see Beastie Boys. However, I can't imagine how anyone would want a refund when they had a chance to see a legendary artist like Jay-Z live. Last year, he appeared as a headliner at the Pemberton Festival in Pemberton, British Columbia. This year, he’ll be leading off a pretty solid festival lineup that will include personal favorites like Coldplay, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Vampire Weekend, Echo & The Bunnymen, MGMT, , the Black Keys, Fleet Foxes, Neko Case, the Ting Tings, the National, Silversun Pickups and Arctic Monkeys. The festival takes place just across the Hudson River from lower Manhattan. so you can attend and not be that far from all the action and excitement of NYC. With the lineup I just mentioned, I’d definitely recommend it………
- Now this is what I like to see: cities telling people to stop doing annoying, useless things like trying to help the homeless. No one wants, needs or appreciates people trying to do nice things for the down and out, I feel confident in saying. So props to the city of Phoenix for telling a local church they are no longer allowed to hold a Saturday service on their lawn during which they feed the homeless. What the congregation and leadership of Crossroads United Methodist Church was thinking when they began holding the Saturday events in January, I’ll never know. Seriously, having homeless people come for a worship service on your lawn and feeding them breakfast is pretty reprehensible. Seeing these poor vagrants walk, bike or take the bus all the way across town just for a free meal and some love from the CUMC congregation is a sign of what’s wrong with our society, no doubt. “We have been feeding the homeless since (the church) began. It’s part of the mission of the church. It’s part of who we are,” said Dottie Escobedo-Frank, pastor at the church. “This is our mission. This is who we are. This is what we do.” Not anymore, it’s not. The city of Phoenix has stepped in and told the church to cease and desist after residents from a neighborhood across the street complained about the event, specifically the noise and the trash that result from it. Because the church is in a residential zone, it cannot operate and sort of charity dining hall. To operate such a facility, a group or organization must be in a commercial or industrial zone. But the city did give the church a nice two-week grace period, allowing them to feed the homeless for the next two Saturdays before shutting it down. The church isn’t laying down and giving up, though; Escobedo-Frank maintains that CUMC is a church first, not a charity dining hall, so the ordinance does not apply to them. “You can’t tell us we’re something that we’re not,” Escobedo-Frank said. “Our argument is that we are not a charity dining hall, so they are defining us incorrectly.” Led by their pastor, the church has appealed the city’s decision. Should the city deny that appeal, the church may also attempt to have the ordinance amended to allow their service/breakfast or move the event to a different location. Personally I’m applauding the city for shutting down this offensive effort, because no one needs to see a church or any other group trying to help downtrodden, oft-overlooked people by feeding them……
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)