- What’s not fun about homecoming week at college? Never mind that no one cares about it and it’s not nearly the big deal in college that it is in high school (at least not at my college), it was homecoming week on Greek and all the fraternities and sororities on campus were paired up to build homecoming floats for the chance to win a $2,000 prize. The Omega Chis and Iota Kappa Iota were paired up, just like IKI president Frannie wanted, and so were the Kappa Taus and Zeta Beta Zetas, just like Cappie and Casey didn’t want. Having their houses paired together puts their plan for a new Cappie-Casey dynamic (i.e. giving each other space) in jeopardy. The project is put further in peril when Cappie gathers the KTs in the back yard of their house and explains that Kappa Taus don’t do floats. However, the $2,000 prize inspires Rusty and fellow KT brother Pickle, who are still devastated over the loss of the frat’s beloved Vesuvius volcano when it was destroyed at a party last semester. Winning the float contest would allow them to rebuild Vesuvius, so Rusty leads the charge to build the float and finds himself summarily named KT float chairman. His only eager KT helper is Heath, who like Rusty wants to carve out a legacy for himself at KT and is running out of time to do so. They feel that rebuilding Vesuvius could be that legacy, so they pour themselves totally into making the best float possible. Their brainstorming session veers from Romeo and Juliet to Star Wars, but ultimately Casey shows up to help her little brother out with the float idea that the ZBZ’s came up with: the Garden of Eden. Rusty accepts the suggestion and the KT’s and ZBZ’s get working on the float, including cray paper flowers, a cray paper snake and an entire float-full of other decorations. Rusty and Heath are tasked with getting the flatbed truck to place the float on and think they have a 20-foot truck lined up at the local rental store. However, Evan and Frannie swoop in at the last moment, pay double for the truck and steal it for the IKI-Omega Chi float. Rusty and Heath are left scrambling and run to five different places to find a truck while all of the ZBZ’s and KT’s continue to hammer away at the float in the backyard of the KT house. The ZBZ’s have to work to motivate the KT’s and keep them focused, but the float turns out well. Rusty and Heath finally find a pathetic pickup truck with a trailer to rent that will be used to transport the float. Casey warns them not to change the float at all overnight, but Rusty can't help him. He works to motorize some of the float’s decorations and power them up, which also turns out well. The next morning, before the homecoming game, Rusty and Heath unveil the revamped float for Casey and the ZBZ’s, who love it. The only problem is that the power they used to motorize the float drained the truck’s battery and keeping it running proves all but impossible. While everyone heads to the stadium to set up their tailgating, Casey is enlisted to drive the truck to the stadium. Along the way, the truck predictably breaks down and when she can’t reach Rusty, Casey calls Cappie. In spite of their new unspoken agreement to steer clear of one another, he takes the call and comes to help her. However, Cappie can’t fix the truck and also wonders why Casey didn’t just call her auto club. They break into a huge argument in which it’s clear that both of them are not over each other, but the auto club guy arrives to end the argument and decides that towing the truck is the best move. So the ZBZ-KT float won't be entered in the contest, but as it turns out, the Omega Chi-IKI float won't fare much better. After Frannie displays its amazing hydraulic system to Rusty and girlfriend Jordan, the float seems like a slam dunk to win. While they wait to see if their own float will arrive, Rusty and the KT’s must improvise. While Wade (set to be Adam on the float) and the other brothers get drunk and goof around, Rusty and Heath decide to create a legacy in a different way. After pirating every keg of beer they can find, they manage to sneak up on the IKI float and rig the hydraulics system to malfunction. The float’s theme was Antony and Cleopatra and the hydraulics moved the two oversized, puppet-like figures together to show them kissing. Thanks to Rusty’s intervention, only Cleopatra moves when Frannie fires up the float and as a result, Cleopatra bends at the waist, appearing to go down and perform a certain sexual act on Antony, at which time the beer Heath stole explodes out of Antony to complete the effect, much to the horror and amusement of all. The IKI float obviously doesn’t win and the winning float ends up being one themed after the fake wedding of reality TV tools Heidi and Spencer. Homecoming Weekend is also a time for ZBZ president Ashleigh and boyfriend Fisher to get to know each other a little better. After seeing the Blue Crew, a group of rabid Cyprus Rhodes students who are a crazy, body-painted spirit group at football games, run across campus screaming like idiots, Ashleigh and Casey laugh at the Crew. However, Ashleigh finds out that Fisher is actually a member of the group. He tries to convince her to take part in their antics as well and although she resists initially, Fisher wins her over by complimenting her and tells her that her fun, adventurous side is why he loves her. Ashleigh agrees to don some blue paint and other parts of the Crew costume and all is well with the happy couple. Evan has his own tough weekend with his parents in town for homecoming. When he expresses concerns over what the money flowing from his trust fund is doing to his life and how he feels an obligation to use his wealth to help those around him and not turn into a person who tries to control his world with money, his parents freak out. They worry that he’s not ready for the wealth he’s being given and decide to cut him off from his trust fund for six months and undergo psychological counseling. He responds be refusing to attend the dean’s reception with them and telling them that he doesn’t want their money because it can’t buy him what he wants: parents who love him for who he is. He does find a sympathetic ear from Rebecca Logan, who has had her share of battles with her rich, privileged parents. At day’s end, the KT’s and ZBZ’s party at the KT house and Heath is celebrated for his part in pranking the IKI float. He has his legacy and as he readies to graduate at the end of the semester and head off to medical school (how un-KT of him), he’ll now be remembered for something other than being the only gay guy in the house. Rusty has his legacy too, even if it isn’t rebuilding Vesuvius. All of this leads up to next week’s season finale, which apparently is going to focus pretty heavily on the Cappie-Casey-Max love triangle. It’s been a fun season, so hopefully the finale lives up to that standard……….
- If anyone in New Orleans is looking for the city’s mayor, I have a bit of bad news. Seems that Mayor Ray Nagin, who traveled to China on an economic development trip, ended up on a plane with a passenger who was for being treated for symptoms of the swine flu virus and as such, Nagin has been quarantined in China for the time being. Also quarantined along with the mayor are his wife and a member of his security detail. They are currently being held in Shanghai, China, though all three are symptom free. "The mayor is being treated with utmost courtesy by Chinese officials," a written statement said. Actually, Nagin was not only on the plane with someone who "exhibited the symptoms of H1N1," but he was sitting next to that passenger. "We have talked with him and he is in good spirits," Ceeon Quiett, the mayor's director of communications, said. I guess it goes to show that whether you’re a college senior who has been student teaching in Mexico for the past couple of months or the mayor of a major U.S. city, nobody is taking any chances with allowing you back into the country and society when the swine flu is involved. I’d also love to hear how a trip to China is relevant and acceptable for the mayor of New Orelans, which to the best of my knowledge does not have a huge Chinese population. But I digress…..all the best to Ray Nagin, his wife and the member of his security of detail now in quarantine. Hope you all are indeed swine flu free and can make it back to the U.S. of A as soon as possible……..
- For anyone scoring at home (and really, who isn’t scoring the Tony Awards at home?), the scoreboard currently reads: Tony Awards backdrop 1, Bret Michaels 0. I still have no earthly idea why Michaels and his band Poison were performing at the Tony Awards to begin with, to be honest. Who thought that booking a bunch of has-been ‘80s hair-metal rockers to play one of their classic tunes for a gathering of theater dorks was a good idea? But regardless of how out of place Michaels, his band and their quintessential 80’s hear and schtik were at the Tonys, that’s not the truly memorable part of the evening. No, that moment came when Poison finished playing one of the two songs from its catalog that anyone remembers, “Nothin’ But a Good Time,” and the band was exiting the stage. Everyone else - drummer, guitarist, bassist - made it off, but there was Michaels out in front, basking in the attention. Perhaps he’s tired of the only real attention he receives being from aging groupie skanks on his VH1 reality bomb Rock of Love, I don’t know. Maybe surgically-enhanced skanks with vocabularies that would make sailors blush throwing themselves at you and preening for the cameras just doesn’t get the job done. So there was Michaels, waving to the crowd before turning and heading back off stage. He was well behind the rest of the band and the wide-angle shot CBS used for the broadcast clearly showed the backdrop coming down fast as Michaels walked underneath it. Wehther anyone tried to warn him or not, dude gets absolutely trucked by the backdrop, right on top of the head. It was such a squared-up shot that Michaels literally falls straight back, hitting the ground as he’s virtually parallel to it. Unfortunately, the producers cut to the next segment before Michaels actually landed with a thud, so hopefully the feed from that first camera will be “leaked” some time soon so we can see the aftermath. But all told, just a freaking hilarious moment. As someone who has never had any interest in the theater, never watched the Tony Awards and has no plans to do either, I can honestly say that I would change my mind if someone could guarantee me that a past-his-prime rocker would get clocked by a backdrop every year at the Tonys. Plus, you know Michaels had to be pissed at going for medical treatment instead of hitting up a post-show party to score some thespian tail………
- People just don’t seem to have an immense amount of respect for the International Criminal Court these days, do they? Men like Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir thumbing their noses at arrest warrants issued by the court seem to be a much more common occurrence of late. Al-Bashir faces charges of crimes against humanity (somewhat broad and generic, can we specify a bit?) and the ICC issued an arrest warrant for him on March 4. Some three months have passed and al-Bashir shows no signs of or inclination to surrender himself to stand trial. Instead, he visited Zimbabwe on Sunday for a regional trade meeting. Attending the two-day African leaders' summit of the Common Market for Eastern and Southern Africa (COMESA) like nothing is wrong takes stones - or a total disregard for the International Criminal Court. The summit is far from his only trip since the warrant was issued, as al-Bashir has also made trips to Qatar and Ethiopia since March 4. That could have something to do with the fact that the International Criminal Court has no arrest powers and depends on its 106-member states to take suspects into custody, but I’m just playing lawyer here. The sad part of this case is that Al-Bashir probably is guilty of war crimes and crimes against humanity in his government's campaign against rebels in Darfur in western Sudan, but until someone steps up to arrest him and force him to stand trial, dude is going to continue to flaunt his freedom and throw it in the face of the ICC and the Sudanese people. Never mind that he’s made history by becoming the first sitting head of state to have a warrant for his arrest issued by the world's only permanent war crimes tribunal, al-Bashir doesn’t give a crap. Oh, and the fact that Sudan expelled 13 international aid agencies from the Darfur region after the warrant was issued is also a fairly good indication of his feelings on the issue. I do appreciate his conspiracy theory that the charges are an attempt by Western powers to recolonize Sudan. But heck, maybe Bono and the doznes of other celebrities who have made Darfur their current cause to rally around can pool their resources, hire Dog the Bounty Hunter and have him go to Sudan to take al-Bashir into custody…….
- If your summer just won't be complete without seeing a 72-year-old man compete in a weightlifting even, then York, Pa. is the place and the end of June is the time for you. That’s when Fred Glass, 72, will compete in the York Barbell Competition. he will be the oldest competitor to ever take place in the event, which is sponsored by the International Power Lifting Association. This isn’t just some small-time. local yokel event either. World-class competitors will be on hand and for his age group, Glass could well be one of them. He has been competing and winning at power lifting competitions for 45 years and last year set a masters record by squatting 400 pounds and dead-lifting 380. Those are great number for anyone, let alone someone old enough to collect Social Security. Not only is Fred Glass pumped to take part in the event, he isn’t viewing this as any sort of last-ditch, say-goodbye effort to the world of competitive lifting. He plans to continue competing as long as he’s alive and kicking and if you don’t believe me, just ask him. "When I'm 100 years old, I would like to squat 400 pounds. I don't want to just move around and make believe I'm lifting weights, but actually be a competitor," Glass said. Now I’ve never been an avid follower of competitive weightlifting and overall, the freaks who ‘roid up, Hulk up and bulk up to obscenely disgusting physiques to win these contests are typically pretty disgusting and reprehensible. That being said, Glass’ story is an inspiring one and I’ll be rooting for him to take another masters’ division crown in York later this month……
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