Enabling FAT people, reuniting the Gallagher brothers and Scottish independence issues

- While most people are simply ignoring the action at the ongoing Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia, one person affected directly by the Games is choosing a different path. Philadelphia Flyers chairman Ed Snider is none too happy about the NHL taking its normal Olympic break to allow players to participate for their respective nations and he made no effort to hide his anger after the Flyers skated past the Colorado Avalanche 3-1 on Thursday night. The Flyers are playing their best hockey of the season, with goalie Steve Mason pitching two shutouts in his past three games. They have scrapped their way to a tie for seventh place in the Eastern Conference and have won three straight entering their two-plus-week Olympic hiatus following tonight’s matchup with Calgary. Asked about the days off, Snyder didn’t hold back. "I hate them," said Snider, the team’s founder. "It's ridiculous, the whole thing is ridiculous. I don't care if it was in Philadelphia; I wouldn't want to break up the league. I think it's ridiculous to take three weeks off, or however long it is, in the middle of the season. It screws up everything. ... How can anybody be happy breaking up their season. No other league does it; why should we? There's no benefit to us whatsoever. If anything, I can only see negatives." Snyder probably could have used a trip to his team’s trophy room or at least the history section of any sports website before making his remarks, as all of those things would have reminded him that the Flyers reached the Stanley Cup finals after the last Olympics in 2010. "Maybe I like them," he said. "I forget about that." Think before you speak, Ed, think before you speak………

- The debate is on and a few months remain for Scots to decide the future of their nation. A vote for Scottish independence is scheduled for this fall and ahead of the vote, various think tanks and research outfits are dissecting the relevant issues to the independence movement. The latest round of research was released this week and Dr. Angus Armstrong of the National Institute of Economic and Social Research (NIESR) urged the United Kingdom’s government to state clearly if a currency union with Scotland could be agreed upon in the event of a yes vote in September's referendum. Prime Minister Alex Salmond's government has proposed plans for Scotland to retain the pound if the country becomes independent, establishing a ''Sterling zone'' with the UK. Various U.K. ministers have expressed doubt over such a plan would work and said it was unlikely their government would back such a move. Armstrong decried the uncertainty around the issue and urged the leaders of both nations to talk about the subject as soon as possible. He warned of possible "vulnerabilities" if there was a currency union between an independent Scotland and the rest of the U.K. on account of the high debt level the new nation could have. Armstrong and NIESR colleague Monique Ebell of estimated Scotland's share of the U.K.’s debt on independence could be £146 billion ($239 billion), giving Scotland a debt-to-GDP ratio of approximately 81 percent, according to the report. Ratios of 40 percent or less are generally considered safe, so doubling that would be a bad formula for starting a country’s independence. Scottish Finance Secretary John Swinney cited the research as evidence that Scotland is in a stronger fiscal position than the rest of the U.K. right now, which is technically true but not necessarily the whole picture. "On any calculation an independent Scotland will have lower levels of debt than the rest of the U.K. and the firm foundations we need to build a stronger and fairer economy," Swinney said……….

- He cranks out the most overrated song of the year with a couple of bizarre French electro-popsters who look like a cross between storm troopers and Olympic bobsledders, he occasionally records his own music and has produced a long list of mainstream pop artists, but Pharrell Williams has loftier aims in this world. One of the most theoretically impossible tasks in music today is the act of bringing the ever-feuding Gallagher brothers together for anything other than a verbal sparring match in the media. Since the breakup of Oasis in 2009 and the differing stories of blame the two have hurled at one another in the past five years, the one thing both men have agreed upon is that they have no interest in putting their successful band back together. Each has moved on and built a new band they believe to be superior to their brother’s new group, but Williams seems to view himself as something of a hip-hop Winston Churchill who can bring the brothers together once more. "Who wouldn't want to work with the Gallaghers? Yeah, both of them," Williams said. Umm…who wouldn’t want to work with the Gallaghers? Anyone who doesn’t enjoy icy death stares being shot across the studio on a constant basis, those who aren’t fans of angry members of a band slamming doors and stomping out of the studio and folks who generally dislike being the awkward third wheel in a simmering sibling feud. Williams is much more likely to achieve his other big musical goal of working with flamboyant pop singer Elton John. "I really respect Elton John's music and I'd love to do something with him," Williams added. Aim high, P………

- The home-carbonating industry is amping up and two power players in the beverage world want a piece of the action. Green Mountain Coffee Roasters and Coca-Cola have agreed to a 10-year deal to develop the Keurig Cold at-home beverage system, company officials confirmed in an official statement. As part of the deal, Coca-Cola will buy a 10 percent equity stake in Green Mountain Coffee Roasters for $1.25 billion. In exchange, GMCR will be Coca-Cola’s exclusive partner for Coca-Cola-branded single-serve, pod-based cold beverages. While not the same as SodaStream and its homemade soda contraption, this idea is the latest attempt to put home beverage-making on a level where more people can enjoy it. To promote the partnership, the two companies issued a statement in which Brian P. Kelley, president and CEO of GMCR, went so far as to invent a new word to hype the endeavor. "With The Coca-Cola Co. as a global strategic partner in our multi-brand at-home Keurig Cold beverage system, we believe there is significant opportunity to premiumize and accelerate growth in the cold beverage category by empowering consumers with an innovative, convenient way to freshly prepare their favorite cold beverages at the push of a button," Kelley said. Premiumize? You can't just invent words and pretend they’re legit, Brian. When it hits the market in 2015, Keurig Cold will use single-serve pods to dispense cold beverages including carbonated drinks, enhanced waters, juice drinks, sports drinks and teas, officials said………

- More excuses for FAT people? Thanks, science. Those without willpower and with a hankering for the sort of fatty, greasy food that is a part of so many weekend get-togethers now have an extra crutch to lean on thanks to researchers at Cornell University who found that humans have a natural weight cycle that fluctuates over the course of a week. The researchers studied 80 people ages 25 to 62. After weighing themselves before breakfast each morning over a minimum of 15 and  maximum of 330 days, participants were divided into three groups based on total weight change over the week. Weight gainers were classified as those with a gain of more than 1 percent, losers were those with a 3 percent or greater decline and maintainers were those who fell in between the two extremes. Even among those who lost weight, the researchers found that 59 percent of participants were at their heaviest on Sundays. The key difference between gainers and losers was that among those who lost weight, 60 percent were able to compensate for their weekend woes by losing weight during the week and reaching their lowest weight on Friday. Conversely, gainers hit their minimum and maximum weights at seemingly random points of the week. “Almost to a person, we weigh the most Sunday night and we weigh the least Friday morning,” said study co-author Brian Wansink, a professor of consumer behavior at Cornell. Sadly, the numbers make some sense within the context of American culture. The weekend is a time to relax, go to parties and depending upon the time of year, binge eat while watching football and doing no physical activity because it’s simply too damn cold outside. “Weight loss occurs during the weekdays. It’s less important what happens during the weekends,” Wansink added. Wrong-O, Brian. It matters what happens every day and when you give excuses to the fat, lazy American populace for their excess girth, you’re only enabling their unhealthy ways………

Creepy statues at women's colleges, Tracy McGrady's dream and Missy Elliott's comeback

- Thank you, Missy Elliott, for answering the question no one was asking. OK, so technically one interviewer asked Elliott about her extended hiatus from what she liberally calls music, but beyond that there wasn’t much of an outcry for her to return to the rap game. Elliott’s last album, “The Cookbook,” dropped in 2005 and she hasn’t been heard from in a musical sense in the past eight-plus years. She’s popped up here and there, but hasn’t released much new music of her own in that time, leaving the promise of a new album titled “Block Party” unfulfilled. An optimist might argue that it’s rap’s version of “Chinese Democracy,” except without a fraction of the talent Axl Rose once possessed and without Elliott ballooning to several times her original weight while searching in vain for anyone willing to record with her because the original members of her band hated her so much that they wanted no part of the album. The last time Elliott dropped any new tracks at all was 2012, when she released a pair of singles titled “Triple Threat” and “Ninth Inning.” Both were produced by hip-pop personality Timbaland and aside from their curious sports-themed titles, there was little worth remembering about either one of them. Now, Elliott wants the world to know that she’ll be making a comeback…at some point. Ever the diva and drama queen, she’s trying to build the hype by keeping her return date a secret. “I just ain't telling nobody when," she said, adding that her comeback must be truly special. “When I create something, its gotta be special, and it can't just be to throw something out there because I feel like I'm Missy. I gotta feel like what I'm giving the fans is 100 per cent and that it's game-changing. I don't just throw out microwave records.” The subtle dig at unidentified peers who toss out those “microwave records” is the best part of her comment, unless of course overhyped and underwhelming rap albums that take a decade to make are your thing………

- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! Bosnia wants in on the action, perhaps to prove that Ukraine isn't the only nation in eastern Europe that is royally pissed off right now. While Ukrainians attempt to overthrow their inept government, Bosnians are rioting for a different reason. Their uprising began in a northern Bosnian when thousands of unpaid workers took to the streets to demand their money and the rage beautifully spread to other parts of the country Thursday. The central theme for the movement is widespread discontent in an election year about unemployment and rampant corruption, but the rage behind the effort is what’s truly uplifting. The epicenter of the riots is the northern city of Tuzla, where p Police used tear gas to temporarily disperse protesters who hurled stones at a local government building. After the police let fly with the tear gas canisters, protestors briefly dispersed but returned with a fury once the cloud lifted, surrounding the building and setting fire to tires and trash in the area. Special canine units were brought in to back up the police, but to little avail. Officials said two dozen people were injured in the clashes and sought medical help, mostly from the effects of the tear gas. The rage began Tuesday in Tuzla, but has now spread its wave of defiance to Sarajevo, Zenica, Mostar and Bihac. An ongoing dispute involving four former state-owned companies that were privatized and later filed for bankruptcy started the Tuzla riots and led workers in those four other cities to rise up in solidarity with the Tuzla workers while expressing their own dissatisfaction with a nearly 40-percent unemployment rate and politicians they accuse of being out of touch with their needs. In Sarajevo, angry workers chucked eggs at the local government building. Still, the best action was in Tuzla, where riots shouted insults and threw buckets of water at the officers who passed by in full riot gear. Even elderly folks got in on the action, banging cooking pots on their windows and balconies. The targets of their rage are four former state-owned companies, which included furniture and washing powder factories and employed most of the population of Tuzla. Those companies went private and rather than honor contracts that obliged them to invest and make them profitable, they sold the assets, stopped paying workers and filed for bankruptcy between 2000 and 2008. Now, their deplorable actions are coming back to haunt them……..

- Bose wants to crank it up. As the maker of high-end stereo equipment, that’s kind of the company’s bag and in that spirit, Bose launched its next-generation SoundLink Bluetooth speaker this week with a $299.95 price tag. Touted as Bose's "best-performing Bluetooth speaker yet," the SoundLink Bluetooth speaker III is promoted as having better audio performance, a new design, longer battery life, and accessory covers in five colors. With its Bluetooth capabilities, Bose is pushing the product as ideal for enjoying music just about anywhere a person wants to rock out. The Soundlink III needs only to be paired wirelessly with a smartphone, tablet or other Bluetooth device in order to disturb everyone in your immediate vicinity with the loudest possible version of your music of choice. Inside the SoundLink III are four neodymium transducers and dual-opposing passive radiators, along with a new digital signal-processing algorithm and improved electronics. All of that fancy tech talk simply means the speaker will play music louder than its predecessor, while still maintaining a balanced and natural sound at higher levels listening levels. "The SoundLink III is beautifully crafted and engineered for durability and grab-and-go use," the company said in an official release. Elements of Bose's SoundLink Mini Bluetooth speaker inspired the overall design for the SoundLink III, which stands 5 inches high, 10 inches wide and 2 inches deep. It is also adorned with a built-in silicon button panel that protects from dirt and a wraparound metal grille that resists fingerprints. Users can add additional protection with an accessory cover in one of five bright colors for a mere $34.95 extra……..

- The next Michael Jordan is finally here. No, not a player with the skills and insane competitive drive to become the greatest basketball player of all-time. That player doesn’t exist and may never exist, but that’s nor what’s in play here. No, we’re talking about a once-great NBA star who wants to pretend that he can walk away from basketball and play baseball instead. Just as Jordan played in the Chicago White Sox organization in 1994 during his first retirement from basketball, reaching the Double-A level and biding his time while he was (allegedly) secretly banned by NBA commissioner David Stern for gambling, retired seven-time NBA All-Star is aiming to become a baseball player Tracy McGrady wants to try his hand at baseball. Unlike Jordan, McGrady is by all appearances done with basketball and also unlike MJ, he will start his baseball journey in the independent Atlantic League. McGrady plans to try pitching for the Sugar Land Skeeters, the same team that Roger Clemens pitched for a couple of years ago after ‘roiding his way through a successful MLB career. A statement from the Skeeters claims it is a "lifelong dream" of McGrady's to play baseball, something McGrady also claims in stories he tells of giving up the sport in high school when he transferred to an elite prep school that didn’t have a baseball team and focused solely on basketball. "McGrady has demonstrated skill, determination and diligence during his training program," the statement said.  "We look forward to monitoring his progress." During his NBA career, the 34-year-old McGrady played for several teams, including the Houston Rockets and Orlando Magic. He last played in the NBA in the 2012-13 season. According to McGrady, he can throw in the mid-80s and that might be good enough to get an out or two in the independent league, but probably not enough to make him anything more than another minor league baseball gimmick……….

- What’s all the fuss about at Wellesley College? It’s as if no one at the women’s college has ever seen a dude on campus clad only in his underwear and without shame. Judging by the reaction, a lifelike statue of a somnambulant male wearing only his tighty-whities is indeed a new phenomenon for the ladies of the all-female school in Massachusetts. The painted bronze statue was recently installed outdoors as part of a new exhibit at the Davis Museum. The double takes and muffled laughter began almost immediately – right after passersby finished taking the requisite selfies with the statue. Unforauntely, some of the uptight women of Wellesley can't enjoy a slightly disturbing look at the out-of-shape male form in statue form and some of these squares have signed a petition asking administrators to remove the bronze man. As one would expect, the artist responsible for the piece is fired up that his art has created such a visceral reaction. “I was talking with the curator of the exhibition and my assistant this morning, and we were saying, ‘When was the last time a work of art was talked about so much and got so much attention?’” sculptor Tony Matelli said“I can’t remember when.” The statue — titled “Sleepwalker” — is part of Matelli’s solo show “New Gravity,” a display full of sculptures that explore how objects can be reversed, upended, or atomized. Angry students want to upend this particular statue and began a petition on Change.org asking college president H. Kim Bottomly to have “Sleepwalker” removed. Yes, the woman who could decide this debate is named Bottomly and she will make the final call on the bottom line here. “[T]his highly lifelike sculpture has, within just a few hours of its outdoor installation, become a source of apprehension, fear, and triggering thoughts regarding sexual assault for many members of our campus community,” the petition reads. “While it may appear humorous, or thought-provoking to some, it has already become a source of undue stress for many Wellesley College students.” If a lifelike statue of a middle-aged dude with no muscle tone and in an apparent state of half-consciousness stirs up all of those images, then the real need for the ladies of Wellesley isn't a trip to an online petition website. No, their first stop should be a psychiatrist’s couch for some quality alone time………

Linkin Park promises, Macedonian pedohpiles and bionic hands for Danes

- Well done, science. This is one of the rare days when you not only accomplish something cool, but also something that is necessary and impactful for the world. On this day, scientists have created and successfully attached a bionic hand that allows the wearer to feel lifelike sensations from their fingers. An international team comprised of robotics experts from Italy, Switzerland and Germany crafted the hand and attached it to Dennis Aabo, a Danish man who lost his left hand in a firework accident nearly a decade ago. Aabo underwent surgery in Italy and had the artificial hand connected to the nerves in his upper arm. He called his new hand “amazing” and in post-surgery tests he was able to tell the shape and stiffness of objects he picked up even when blindfolded. "It is the first time that an amputee has had real-time touch sensation from a prosthetic device" said professor Silvestro Micera from the Ecole Polytechnique Federale de Lausanne and Scuola Superiore Sant'Anna, Pisa. The hand itself was not the most advanced aspect of the project; that would be the electronics and software that enabled it to give sensory feedback to the brain. Micera and his team added sensors to the artificial hand so it could detect and measure information about touch. The research team used computer algorithms to transform the electrical signals they emitted into an impulse that sensory nerves could interpret. With their bio-hand completed, they brought Aabo to Rome and affixed four electrodes onto nerves in the patient's upper arm. The electrodes were connected to the artificial sensors in the fingers of the prosthetic hand, allowing touch and pressure feedback to be sent direct to the brain. Aabo spent a month doing laboratory tests to ensure that the electrodes were both connected to his new hand and functioning properly………

- Stop feeding the effing birds, Long Islanders. It is that difficult to understand or is your prototypical New York City arrogance preventing you from seeing the blatantly obvious? Hempstead is the town in question and large-scale bird feedings are the issue. The Hempstead Town Board voted unanimously Tuesday to approve a law that targets property owners who attract many birds with large amounts of food. Virtually everyone has that one tool who lives near them and puts out copious amounts of food for the birds, who then flock to the yard in question and make a mess of the surrounding area with their lost feathers, droppings and general birdie filth. Hempstead can thank the Sessler family for this new measure because the family complained that the owner of the boat yard they live next door to was feeding wheelbarrows filled with cornmeal to birds every day, sometimes several times a day. Patriarch Jeremy Sessler led the charge and should be commended for his effort. “There’s north of a couple of hundred birds — pigeons, geese, swans,” Sessler said. His wife Lara cited the general squalor created by the birds and claimed the animals have been running wild on her property and leaving behind all manner of unseemly odors. “It’s filthy,” Lara Sessler said. “It’s all over our patio, our furniture, our vehicles.” Neighbors from as far as several blocks away confirmed the foul smell, but until Tuesday there was little that could be done. In America’s biggest township, there was no law against feeding as many birds as often as a person wanted. Now, residents are banned from feedings that attract at least 10 birds on at least three days within a 15-day period. Violators can be fined up to $1,000 per violation and while the fine should be steeper and perhaps be part of a wider-reaching law also targeting casual bird feeding, it’s a solid start………

- Speak the truth, @CRO31. New York Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie knows how NFL players think (just like he knows how to father double-digit children by more than half-dozen different women) and he knows that there is no way the league is going to keep its players from smoking pot. The issue came to the forefront at the Super Bowl because both participating teams hailed from states where ganja is legal for recreational use and Seahawks coach Pete Carroll made waves by saying he agreed with the notion the league should investigate medicinal marijuana to see if it can help players. Commissioner Roger Goodell was non-committal when asked about legalizing the hippie lettuce to help players cope with pain, but Cromartie sees no such gray area. He is well-aware that medicinal marijuana is legal in 20 states, plus the District of Columbia. In the world of Cro, the NFL may as well legalize Mary Jane because players are going to toke up anyhow. "We're just going to do it anyway," Cromartie told. "They just need to let it go. They need to go ahead and say, 'Y'all go ahead, smoke it, do what you need to do.'" After someone close to him alerted him to the fact that saying “we” are going to smoke herb anyhow suggested that he likes to get baked, Cromartie took to Twitter to claim that he was intimating no such thing. “The interview that I did on the weed policy, I never said We're I said tht Players will smoke anyway. I don't smoke so I don't care about it,” he tweeted. Uh-huh, sure thing Cro. Guys with nearly a dozen children by almost that many different women don’t typically come across as the sort of dudes who also like to burn the hippie lettuce, so no worries there. Like his words or not, there is no question he’s correct and not just because dozens of NFLers test positive for marijuana every year. If dozens test positive, then assume the rest of the potheads in the league are merely smart enough to game the system and only smoke their stash after they have their one random annual test………..

- There is only one question to ask when Linkin Park poses an Instagram teaser hinting at a new album: Is this one going to suck less than the band’s previous two train wrecks of sonic awfulness? That question won't be answered for a while, but frontman Mike Shinoda posted the picture along with a few comments on how the new album is shaping up. He suggested it will be much different than Linkin Park’s previous release, “Living Things,” which dropped in 2012. Along with its predecessor, “Minutes to Midnight,” the album almost single-handedly wrecked the image and style the band had crafted by sounding like an extended electronic jam session instead of a hard-charging rap-rock hybrid. "As most Linkin Park fans know, the sound of each album is usually quite different from the last," Shinoda wrote. "The new album is no exception. But, as usual, the album's sound twists and turns as it is created, so any attempt at estimating what it sounds like today would be silly.” In truth, no one needs to know what the album sounds like today. They merely need to know that it won't sound like some clusterf*ck of bad electronic effects that will make them wonder if they mistakenly brought the album of some crappy Euro-pop band that was on the shelf next to Linkin Park at the record store. Shinoda went on to say that the album is likely to take plenty of twists and turns before its release, which does not have an official date yet. The band is slated to be one of the headline acts for Download Festival 2014 and perform their 2000 album “Hybrid Theory” in its entirety at the event……

- Pedophiles of Macedonia, you’ve been warned. The Mediterranean nation’s parliament has adopted a bill imposing chemical castration on repeat offenders convicted of sexually abusing children, a move that should be well-received by children’s rights groups….right? Or not. Immediately after the new law was enacted, the country’s leading child protection group said that the new measure is still too lenient. The Megjasi child protection group, which pushed for castration on child sex offenders, wants the penalty to be mandatory even for first-time offenders. As part of the new law, legislators voted to make penalties harsher for convicted pedophiles, increasing the maximum sentence from 15 years to life imprisonment and imposing chemical castration on second-time offenders. The procedure will be imposed on their release from prison, which seems like the wrong end of their sentence on which to carry out the procedure. Additionally, the law introduces a minimum 15-year prison term for severe sexual offenses against minors, while other sexual-related crimes against children are punishable by between three and 10 years in prison. Any first-time offender who voluntarily gets chemically neutered will be eligible for a reduced sentence, which doesn’t seem like the best deal on the table. Chemical castration involves regular injections that decrease the production of testosterone and the injections can be administered over an extended period of time. Megjasi head Dragi Zmijanac suggested that mandatory castration would “prevent first time offenders repeating the crime," with is both factually and literally accurate while also being a bit on the excessive side. Megjasi also advocated for the tagging of released pedophiles with electronic bracelets, like rare animals in the wild being tracked by scientists, but that too was rejected by lawkmakers. How many pervs will be impacted by this new law? According to the Macedonian Ministry of Labor and Social Policy, 23 people were convicted of pedophilia in 2013. The ministry did not specify how many were repeat offenders……..

Jared Lorenzen resurfaces, Metrodome roof backpacks and Egypt's original pyramid

- The list of names who provided voice talent for “The Lego Movie” is impressive: Liam Neeson, Elizabeth Bank, Morgan Freeman, Chris Pratt, Channing Tatum and Will Ferrell. The animated flick built around the classic Danish children’s toy hits theaters this weekend and it already seems like a slam dunk for parents looking to get their children out of the house on a frigid winter weekend. Warner Bros. is the studio behind the movie and clearly, its executives are enthused about what they have on their hands. They’re so geeked, in fact, that they have already hired a team of writers to begin work on a sequel. Warner Bros. is projecting the film to be a huge hit and reportedly have inked Jared Stern and Michelle Morgan to begin work on a script for the follow-up. The promotional campaign for the first film has bombastically billed it as “the greatest movie ever assembled,” which seems a tad excessive for a computer-animated adventure comedy which follows an average Lego character named Emmet (Pratt) who is mistaken for the extraordinary and all-powerful MasterBuilder. Emmet is sent on a mission to defeat an evil tyrant who's plotting to destroy the Lego universe by gluing it together and as one might expect with a perpetual screw-up thrust into a role for which he is hopelessly and ridiculously underprepared, hilarity ensues. Mix in the golden pipes of Morgan Freeman, the very specific set of skills Neeson possesses and the comedic genius of Ferrell and the mix seems like the perfect combination for a movie aimed at those under the age of 12 (and the parents who will inevitably be dragged to the theater to see it)………..

- Ireland likes three things a whole lot: Guinness, Gaelic football and bribes. The European Commission wants the lone non-United Kingdom nation in the British Isles to get rid of one-third of that trio and let’s just say it’s not the one that is fermented and bottled in the heart of Dublin. Ireland has already undertaken substantial reforms in tackling corruption, but the EC isn't satisfied. It wants the country to improve the speed at which it secures criminal prosecutions, according to a new report published by the European Union. It is the first EU anti-corruption report and it examines issues of transparency, public procurement policies and bribery across the EU’s 28 member states. The report crushes Ireland in terms of its ability to battle corruption, nothing that despite substantial progress in improving transparency and accountability in matters related to public procurement, electoral funding and fraud, “corruption-related risks associated with close ties between politicians and industry continue to be a cause for concern.” Chief among the EU’s concerns seems to be that convictions in white collar crime in Ireland fell significantly between 2003 and 2010 despite an increase in the number of cases. In the report, EU officials cited the length of time taken to progress investigations into the role of financial institutions in the banking crisis. Those problems “contributed to a general climate of mistrust in the transparency and accountability of the financial sector in the country and in the capacity of corporate oversight and enforcement,” the report stated. The case centered on Anglo Irish Bank and it took four years before any indictments were issued. A whopping 81 percent of Irish respondents to the EU report believe corruption is widespread, compared to an EU average of 76 percent. Funding for political parties is another area of concern and if Ireland truly wants to improve in these areas, it might want to solicit advice from countries such as Finland, Denmark and Sweden, which were perceived by their citizens……….

- Suck it, Great Pyramid of Giza. You might be the oldest of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, but your status as the original among the historic pyramids of Egypt has just been ripped by a simple step pyramid uncovered by archaeologists in southern Egypt. The newly discovered structure is believed to be a few decades older than the Great Pyramid. Scientists were aware of the pyramid’s existence, but it remained buried under a thick layer of sand until a group of archaeologists started excavation works in 2010. A team led by Gregory Marouard, a research associate at the University of Chicago's Oriental Institute, worked to unearth the pyramid, which is estimated to have stood 43 feet high when it was constructed around 4,600 years ago. It now stands one-third of that height because the blocks used to build it have been pillaged throughout its centuries-long existence. The step pyramid was one of seven so-called "provincial" pyramids built across central and southern Egypt by either the Pharaoh Huni or Snefru, who combined to rule Egypt from 2635-2590 B.C. It does not have any internal chambers and was not used for burials, leaving its actual purpose something of a mystery. Most experts believe such pyramids were built as symbolic monuments scattered over Egypt as confirmation of the pharaohs’ divine powers. "The construction itself reflects a certain care and a real expertise in the mastery of stone construction, especially for the adjustment of the most important blocks," Marouard said during a recent presentation. One clue about the purpose of the pyramids is an installation where food offerings appear to have been made, found by the team of archaeologists. Graffiti also adorns the pyramid’s walls, showing a book roll, a seated man, a four-legged animal, a reed leaf and a bird. "These are mostly private and rough inscriptions, and certainly dedicated to child burials located right under these inscriptions at the foot of the pyramid," Marouard explained. Based on their findings, the research team postulated that the pyramid was used for less than 50 years and was likely abandoned about the same time the building of the Great Pyramid of Giza started under Pharaoh Khufu……..

- Seeing an iconic venue fall into a state of disuse and disrepair is tough to see. A stadium, concert hall or arena that has hosted hundreds of great events but is now a neglected relic of a bygone era is equal parts eyesore and piece of nostalgia. Minneapolis’ Metrodome has been around for 31 years, but it has also gone from a venue that hosted two professional sports franchises and a Division I college football team to a building without a tenant. Major League Baseball’s Minnesota Twins moved out and into Target Field in 2010, the Minnesota Golden Gophers now occupy the shiny new TCF Bank Stadium on their campus and with the 2013 NFL season in the books, the Minnesota Vikings’ tenure at the dome has ended as well. The Vikings were able to extort local taxpayers and government officials, er, persuade the locals to help them fund a new stadium that will help them further boost their revenues and that makes the Metrodome irrelevant. It will no longer be needed to host games or concerts and so its Teflon roof was deflated for the final time on Jan. 18. That’s when Minneapolis businessman Jim Cunningham sprung into action. Cunningham has served as an event host for the Twins, the Minnesota Wild of the NHL and other local teams and when the Metrodome’s roof collapsed in 2010 following a snowstorm, he had an idea. “It just hit me,” Cunningham said “You know what would be great? A swatch of the Dome. I betcha everybody would want a swatch of the Dome.” He bought as many pieces of the old roof as he could when they went on sale and procured an acre and a half of the inner fabric of the roof and an acre and a half of the outer fabric too. When the replacement roof was deflated last month, Cunningham snatched up as much as possible and contacted local backpack maker Duluth Pack to see if the company wanted to partner with him. “This is a Teflon-based, fiberglass-woven fabric,” Duluth Pack president Tom Sega said. “And so this is as strong as it comes.” The material is cut and sewn together at the Duluth Pack factory and each bag comes with plenty of character. The nicks, cuts and blemishes on the fabric hints at the history of the dome and those who buy one of the bags can use their imagination to guess what might have made the marks………

- As the Seattle Seahawks claimed their first Super Bowl victory on Sunday, other football players continued to chase their dreams around the United States. Those dream chasers include former NFL players who want to get back to the pinnacle of their sport, young players fresh out of college who didn’t make an NFL roster but are battling for a second look…..and a certain 325-pound, left-handed quarterback biding his time in the Continental Indoor Football League and waiting for the NFL to give him the chance he so clearly deserves. Yes, you read that right: a 325-pound QB and better still, one with nimble feet, sweet moves in the open field and a knack for making plays. He is former Kentucky Wildcats and New York Giants QB Jared Lorenzen and the man with nicknames like the Hefty Lefty and the Pillsbury Throwboy is currently anchoring the backfield for the Northern Kentucky River Monsters of the CIFL. Lorenzen was never thin and was pushing 300 pounds even during his time in the NFL, but he has clearly not been hitting the salad bar since then and while no one has confirmed his exact weight, he’s bigger than any of his offensive linemen and 325 pounds seems like a conservative estimate. Yet YouTube video of Lorenzen’s performance in Monday night’s win over the Lexington Bluegrass Warhorses went viral in a hurry as the world drank in the highlights of the portly signal caller going 20 of 37 for 183 yards and three touchdowns. Lorenzen has bounced around football in recent years, including a stint as the commissioner for the Ultimate Indoor Football League, but on the field is clearly where he belongs and more Hefty Lefty highlights are good for the world………

A real life "Castaway," Chromecast SDK lurches forward and U2 battles irrelevance

- There are many dumb reasons to get oneself kicked off a college basketball team – bongs are prominently involved in many of them – but Oklahoma State freshman guard Stevie Clark managed to find one of the most insipid entries on the list. Clark was dismissed from his team following a Sunday arrest on suspicion of outraging public decency, which only sounds like a prudish and outdated ordinance from the 1800s that should have gone the way of corsets and forced servitude. In truth, it’s a very real and very current law in the state of Oklahoma and it netted this fool his second arrest in the span of a month. Clark was arrested at 12:46 a.m. Sunday and subsequently released after posting bond following an incident in which police responded to a call about a man urinating out of a vehicle window. Yes, a dude taking a leak out the window of a car. While police did not charge Clark with any alcohol-related offenses, it’s not difficult to imagine a circumstance in which alcohol would be involved with a college guy dropping trou and letting it rip out of a car window. Booze or not, pissing out a car window is not the wisest move for a dude who was arrested one month prior on suspicion of possessing marijuana after a traffic stop for a seatbelt violation. The ganja arrest occurred Jan. 1 in Edmond, Okla., about an hour from the OSU campus in Stillwater. Oklahoma State coach Travis Ford let the first arrest slide, relatively speaking, and didn’t kick Clark off the team. The second arrest in four weeks was simply too much and Ford announce Clark’s dismissal in a statement that read,” "We care about Stevie and wish nothing but the best for him. We want him to find success in his future, [wherever] that may be." Not exactly what a team that has lost three of its last four games to tumble out of the top 10 needs……….

- Homicidal (or suicidal) kooks, this is your chance to make your mark on the world…..by ripping some menacing creatures from it. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission needs your help, but only if you meet certain strict, stringent standards for its crusade to wipe out nuisance-causing alligators in Osceola County. Yes, the powers that be (extremely desperate) are being overrun by gators and they need the assistance of souls who are both blessed with an abundance of free time and do not place a high value on their own life or well-being. If that sounds like you, then you need to know that the FWC is accepting applications for contracted nuisance alligator trappers. Obviously, no government agency is going to accept every kook desperate enough to apply, so go in knowing that you must a) reside in Osceola County, b) have no criminal history, c) have no fish or wildlife law violations and d) be technologically competent enough to  own a valid email address. Those are high marks to aim for and they will undoubtedly weed out some would-be trappers (as will actual weed because anyone sitting around all day and thinking they’d like to trap gators for fun has an excellent chance of being high), but those who remain must turn their application in to the FWC by Feb. 14. Ladies, you could even submit an application for your man as a surprise Valentine’s Day gift. Once the applications are in, FWC officials said, preference will be given to applicants who reside east of the turnpike………

- Give Bono credit for honesty. The biggest rock star in the world and arguably the most iconic frontman of his generation has been at the forefront of rock for nearly three decades, but the Irish rocker admitted recently that U2 are "on the verge of irrelevance.” Speaking as the band’s new single was made available for a free download in support of AIDS research and treatment and ahead of the release of its new album, Bono conceded that U2 does not occupy the place it once did in music and suggested that there was much riding on its new release. “We're on the verge of irrelevance. You have to make stuff relevant to you and where you're at, make an honest account of what you're going through,” he said. “If that's relevant to other people, great. But we don't know.” The new album will be U2’s 13th studio release and it remains untitled, although Bono did suggest that the project would have roots in the band’s original sound, back when he rocked a mullet and had yet to discover the iconic sunglasses he now wears everywhere he goes. "We went back to why we wanted to be in a band in the first place,” he added. “We were listening to the Ramones and Kraftwerk – you can hear both on 'Invisible.’ It opened up a whole valve for me writing, it was like a dam burst of sorts." While vague on the details, Bono said the new record is still being worked on "in this great capital, in a dank basement" and would be finished in two months. When it’s done and the time comes to tour in support of the project, Bono said he and his crew will likely eschew the large stadiums in which they played on their 360 Tour of the past few years and focus on more “intimate” venues like London’s famed, 20,000-seat O2 Arena. Ah, to be successful enough that such a venue is considered quaint and intimate……..

- Who’s ready to Chromecast? Chromecast SDK is Google’s platform to favorite online entertainment options on your HDTV—movies, TV shows, music, and more from Netflix, YouTube, Hulu Plus, Google Play Movies and Music and Chrome. In other words, it takes content from the smaller screens of computers to the flatscreen in your living room. The platform is run from a plug-in device that retails for $35 and Google is now working to add new content for that device. According to the company’s official product page, the list now stands at 15. Expect that list to grow more rapidly now that Google has finally opened Chromecast up to developers, allowing them to add a cast button to any app or website. A few select developers have had Chromecast access in order to preview the platform, but they were not able to publish apps because Google didn’t believe the setup was ready for a full rollout yet. In the interim, the company has worked on ways to make the service more reliable as well as adding ways to send media to Chromecast. The more substantial and nuanced the app the more work it needs in order to make it work. Along the way, Google made the SDK part of the Google Play Services framework so people can get access to Chromecast-capable apps without the need to update Android itself. Experts expect the new SDK to enable a wide range of apps aside from media-streaming ones and Rishi Chandra, Chromecast's director of product management, believes there is potential for all manner of gaming apps. Chromecast launched last July with support for Netflix and YouTube, Google Play Music and the ability to play content purchased through the Google Play store and has since added Pandora, Hulu Plus, HBO Go, Plex, Vevo, Songza and others………

- Tom Hanks and Wilson, you have company. Meet Jose Salvador Albarengo, an El Salvadorian man who washed ashore on the Marshall Islands over the weekend  and immediately claimed to have survived more than a year adrift in the Pacific Ocean, drinking turtle blood and catching fish and birds with his bare hands. Albarengo told local officials set sail on a shark fishing trip from Mexico in late December 2012, but somewhere along the way he was blown out to sea. By the time his journey ended, he had traveled some 6,200 miles to the place where he was found in a disoriented state on a remote coral atoll. Officials estimated he washed up some time early in the weekend in his 22-foot fiberglass boat. A police patrol boat spotted him and transported him to Majuro, the capital of the islands, for medical attention. "It was supposed to be a one-day fishing expedition, but they were blown off course by the northern winds," said Thomas Armbruster, the U.S. Ambassador to the Marshall Islands. One-day expeditions and three-hour tours have a propensity for ending badly, but this case had a happy ending. When Albarengo arrived in Majuro, he was assisted down the gangplank by a male nurse and rushed away to a hospital for medical checks. Witnesses told tales of a man struggling off the boat with a bushy bear, emaciated legs and looking much worse for the wear. Albarengo reportedly set sail with a teenage companion, but his sailing partner died a month into their odyssey. In a statement, El Salvador's Foreign Ministry said it was working with Mexican authorities to return him to Mexico, and then on to El Salvador. Ending up in the Marshall Islands, with a miniscule population of 68,000 people spread over 24 coral atolls, could be the perfect ending for Hanks next “stranded at sea” dramas, but judging by the pictures circulating of Albarengo, he won't have to lose quite as much weight this time……….

Movie news, Riot Watch! Election Day edition and Tiger Woods is depressing

-->

- Technology can help people…when the effing government gets its ass out of the way and lets it happen. That subtle poke is directed as you, Federal Aviation Adminsitration, for your indefensible efforts in prohibiting a Minnesota brewery from distributing its frosty beverage to local ice fishermen via drone. Lakemaid is the name of this fine local establishment and it was recently testing a new drone delivery system to airlift frosty cases of beer to fishermen holed up in ice shacks on Mille Lacs Lake. By virtue of the fact that they live in the perpetually frozen hellscape that is Minnesota and endure its inhumane winters, these fishermen should qualify for beer however and whenever they want it. Yet after spotting a Lakemaid YouTube video of one of Lakemaid’s unmanned aerial vehicles on a test run, the squares at the FAA contacted Lakemaid and told the company to cease and desist. For now, it is illegal the law to fly drones for commercial purposes or above 400 feet in the United States. The FAA’s bureaucrats are crafting a comprehensive set of rules and regulations that will pave the way for commercial drone flight, but such laws are at least one year away. In response to having technology’s latest attempt to improve the life of mankind thwarted, a WhiteHouse.gov petition has been launched and with 183 of the necessary 100,000 signatures needed to mandate a presidential response already secured, a mere 99,817 John Hancocks remain. Tech enthusiast and sometimes Republican d-bag Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ken.) has previously expressed his support of aerial beer delivery on Twitter. Until the new laws are in place, only amateurs can fly drones and they are limited to small vehicles under 55 pounds. National companies such as Amazon and Domino’s Pizza have broached the idea of delivering their products by drone, but right now it’s just talk……..

- Being a Tiger Woods apologist must be impossibly difficult right now. He still hasn’t won a major since plowing into a fire hydrant and tree with his SUV on Thanksgiving night in 2009 and now, he’s setting dubious personal records that even his staunchest supporter cannot explain away. After missing the cut in his first tournament of the year, the Farmers Insurance Open, at a course (Torrey Pines) he usually rules, Woods took the long flight to Dubai and proceeded to finish tied for 41st at the Omega Dubai Desert Classic. That leaves him with two finishes outside the top 20 in his first two starts of a season – ever. He fired a 1-under-par 71 at Emirates Golf Club in his final round and lost to someone named Stephen Gallacher, who played the first two rounds with Woods and won the tournament by one shot on Sunday. "Unfortunately I turned it around too late. I drove it great today, I piped it all day," Woods said. "My iron game was not as sharp as I'd like, and I didn't make anything. I had seven lip-outs. That's quite a few lip-outs.” Lip-outs or not, Woods needs to find answers quickly as he watches the Super Bowl in United Arab Emirates and then flies to India for an outing on Tuesday. He won five tournaments last year and reclaimed the No. 1 spot in the world rankings, sure, but he was so far from the dominant Tiger Woods that once reigned in the golf world that the two weren't even distant cousins. Finishing not only outside the top 20, but outside the top 40 (80th at the Farmers event) in two straight events suggests that he’s closer to the Champions Tour than he is to winning another major. His previous worst two-tournament start to the season was in 2011, when he tied for 44th at Torrey Pines and followed with a 20th-place finish in Dubai. He has won one of his first two tournaments nine times in his 18 years on tour, but wasn’t close to that this time around. Event tournament organizers are talking junk about him. "He's obviously not on top of his game, everyone wants to see the real Tiger," said Adrian Flaherty, the tournament director for the Dubai event. Well said, A……..

- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! In a special Election Day edition of everyone’s favorite overview of social dissidence ‘round the world, protesters blocked polling stations and obstructed ballot boxes in parts of Bangkok and southern Thailand on Sunday, disrupting a contentious national election aimed at resolving the country’s long-running political standoff. Raging anti-government demonstrators used a coordinated campaign to prevent some 6 million voters from casting ballots, according to election officials. Embattled Prime Minster Yingluck Shinawatra called for the election in Decmber in the hopes of strengthening her slipping grip on power, but because of the protests it is unlikely that enough votes will have been cast or enough parliamentary seats would be filled to allow her to form a new government. Officials suggested that voting in areas that were disrupted Sunday could be rescheduled, but protestors have already pledged to keep their efforts to stall any balloting alive indefinitely. How effective were they? Effective enough that election officials said about 10,000 of the 93,000 voting stations across the country were unable to open, the majority in the south. A stunned Shinawatra sounded downright despondent when asked how to resolve the standoff. “I can’t say anything,” she said. Some of the day’s best dissidence came in Din Daeng district, where protesters blockaded a polling center, leading to a tense standoff with voters Sunday morning. Thailand’s main opposition – the Democrat Party, which boycotted Sunday’s balloting – has been raging against the machine for some three months now and police have largely left them alone. This mess is far from over, but more entertaining by the day………

- No one wants to put out a decent new movie in 2014, it seems, and so the status quo reigned at the box office once more. The uninspired “Ride Along” retained first place for the third straight weekend, banking an unimpressive $12.3 million (not quite as unimpressive as the watchability of the Super Bowl) to raise its three-week domestic earnings total to $92.9 million. “Frozen” rose two spots in its 11th week of release, bringing in $9.4 million to make its overall haul $360 million and counting. The first new movie in the top 10 was “That Awkward Moment,” which claimed $9 million in its debut to place third. “The Nut Job” finished fourth, earning $7.6 million for a three-week bank roll of $50.2 million. “Lone Survivor” snagged fifth place on the strength of $7.1 million in earnings, pushing it past the $100 million mark at $104.8 million in six weeks. “Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit” was next in sixth place, making $5.4 million. In three weeks of release, the spy drama has brought in $38.9 million. The second new film in the top 10 was the romantic drama “Labor Day,” which opened to $5.2 million amidst relatively little fanfare. Eighth place belonged to “American Hustle,” owner of a $4.3 million weekend and $133.6 million in total domestic dollars through eight weeks. “The Wolf of Wall Street” snaked $3.6 million in its sixth weekend, good enough for ninth place and a $104.1 million domestic tally so far. “I, Frankenstein” followed its underwhelming debut last weekend with a terrible second weekend, scraping together $3.5 million for tenth place. “August: Osage County” lost its spot in the top 10 from last weekend……..

- Some people just don’t learn. We’re all looking at you, 81-year-old Sebring, Fla. resident Mary Musselman. Musselman recently spent a night in jail and this octogenarian was behind bars for a damn good reason: feeding bears in her backyard. The Kenilworth Boulevard resident is facing charges ranging from violating probation to battery on a law enforcement officer after repeatedly ignoring orders from law enforcement to stop feeding black bears at her home and getting nasty when police responded to put her chicanery to a stop. Some of the former gym teacher’s students are opposing her prosecution, but the positive thoughts of people who learned to play dodgeball and climb ropes from this woman five decades ago can't make the law go away. Florida Fish and Wildlife Commission officials say their battles with Musselman began last year when they had to euthanize a black bear she kept feeding. "Feeding bears results in bears losing their fear of people," said FWC spokesman Gary Morse. Morse noted that when a person feeds bears, the bears become dependent on that support and cannot be relocated. Officers made efforts to educate Musselman about the dangers of feeding wildlife, going so far as to show her educational videos and present her with literature. "She told us she wasn't going to stop," Morse said. Points for honesty, M., but those points don’t do much good behind bars. Musselman was issued a warning on Nov. 11, but 11 days later officers were back and found her feeding two more bears. Another incident on Dec. 4 led to a notice to appear in court on Dec. 6. The judge then ordered Musselan to stop feeding all wild animals and FWC officers were ordered to check on her residence weekly. The day before Christmas, this defiant old braod was back in court and admitted feeding two to three bears large amounts of food. She admitted to putting out as many as 17 or 18 bowls of dog food, so the judge found her guilty of two counts of feeding wildlife. Even then, she got off with one year of probation. When the feedings continued, the judge ordered FWC officers to arrest her. At that point, Musselman bowed up, went badass and allegedly threatened to kill the officers. She was jailed and despite prayer gatherings by her supporters and pleas to release her and let her off the hook because her husband is dying of cancer haven’t made the case go away……….

Touchdown Jesus gets a makeover, battling peanut allergies and Pharrell v. Franz Ferdinand

- It’s not really a true day in the world of hip-hop (or faux hip-hop) unless someone is accusing someone else of stealing one of their beats, riffs or chords, so count today as legit now that Franz Ferdinand frontman Alex Kapranos has accused producer Pharrell Williams of "borrowing" a riff from the band for a new song he produced for Paloma Faith. Williams worked with Faith on the new single “Can't Rely On You,” the first track from the London-based singer’s new album “A Perfect Contradiciton.” The accompanying video is also online and when he heard the track, Kapranos heard a riff that sounded awfully familiar to one contained in one of the few tracks from his band that the average music fan would know, the 2004 song “Take Me Out.” Like anyone with a beef but without immediate access to the object of their anger, Kapranos took to Twitter to confront Williams. He suggested that the song borrows generously from his own work, although Kapranos didn’t exactly sound like he wanted to find Williams and fight him for his musical misdeed. "Hey @Pharrell - I love your tunes. If you want to borrow a riff, just ask," Kapranos tweeted. Williams has yet to respond, but if he follows the hip-hop playbook to which he claims to subscribe, he’ll steadfastly deny that he borrowed any part of the song from anyone and good-naturedly tell Kapranos to stay in his lane and not mess with an über-producer who churns out a steady stream of crappy pop music but is still much richer and more successful than the lead singer for a quality indie rock band from the United Kingdom…….

- If peanuts terrify you because they have the potential to kill you, then good news is on the way. Thanks to researchers at the Stanford University School of Medicine, the world is that much closer to a blood test for DNA changes that could be used to monitor the long-term effectiveness of so-called "immunotherapy" in patients allergic to peanuts. Such treatments seek to build up resistance in people with peanut allergy and according to Dr. Kari Nadeau, an associate professor of pediatrics at Stanford, they may also leave telltale signs in the people's immune-system DNA. There is still no cure for peanut allergies, but researchers are studying the possibility that consuming increasing amounts of peanut powder could help desensitize people to the peanut allergen. Some patients are actually told post-treatment that they should eat peanuts every day for the rest of their lives. The problem is that it's not possible to test patients to determine if they can safely stop eating peanuts every day, Nadeau explained. "At first, eating two peanut butter cups a day might seem fun, but it gets a little boring and a lot of people might stop," Nadeau said. "Our new finding can help us try to determine whether, for the long term, someone's allergy has truly been shut off so people can eat ad lib." Her study was small in size, with 20 children and adults with peanut allergies spending two years building up their immunity to the point that they were able to eat a 4-gram serving of peanuts each day without suffering a severe allergic reaction. Participants were then instructed to avoid peanuts for three months, after which they were given a small amount of peanut powder to determine if their allergy had returned. Thirteen participants’ peanut allergies had returned, while seven remained allergy-free, the study authors said. Blood analysis determined that the DNA in white blood cells, which help reduce allergy response, was different in each group. Nadeau believes this test might one day help doctors in deciding whether a person "can safely go off of immunotherapy, or if they need to continue to eat the food every day." Study this one closely, science, because a person’s ability to enjoy Snickers bars is not to be trifled with……..

- Someone call LMFAO (they’re probably not busy) and tell them to get to Licking County, Ohio right away. A resident of one of Ohio’s most rural counties is (or thinks) she’s sexy and she knows it. The artist formerly known as Sheila Ranea Crabtree is going where luminaries such as Chad Ochocinco have gone, changing her name to something truly absurd and having no remorse. Crabtree decided she hated her given first name so much that she felt the need to legally change it, which isn’t weird or unprecedented. What is weird is changing your first name to Sexy, which Crabtree has done. She picked her new moniker because she says it fits her personality and it’s something her husband often calls her, although by that logic she could likely have switched it to, “Hey babe,” “Honey,” “B*tch” or “You f’ing idiot” and they would have fit. Her hate of her original name was the driving factor in the nuttiness. “It’s an ugly name I was cursed with,” Crabtree said. “My mom chose my middle name, Ranea, which I love. And my dad chose the ugly name.” She claims that she intended to choose her new name without any fanfare and originally, she didn’t even tell her husband about it. Unfortunately for her and her quest for secrecy, part of the application process to change one’s name is running a notice in the newspaper. Someone stumbled across this news nugget, word spread and next thing you know, a story in über-small print became big news around town. Crabtree has received interview requests from websites, radio stations and TV stations from all over the country, but insisted she isn't doing it for attention. Uh huh, sure. “My husband sometimes calls me sexy,” she said. “I just decided on that just because it’s fun. I wasn’t expecting anyone to find out. I didn’t even tell my husband I was going through with it. I’m not doing it for attention. I’m just doing it for me. This is what I want in my life.” That’s a lie, of course. If she wanted a new name without the fanfare, she would have changed it to an actual name and not Sexy. But her plan to get a lot of attention while pretending she doesn’t want any of it is working perfectly and although her 15 minutes will be up any second now, they are 15 minutes more than she should have gotten………

- How does that feel, Europe? All those years looking down your noses at the United States and thinking you’re smarter, cooler and more cultured (at least the last one is true) than Americans is bad karma and the blast of winter weather b*tch-slapping your continent is proof. The most dire situation is in Serbia, which has declared localized state of emergency zones as it deploys its military to rescue more than 1,000 people stranded by severe snowstorms. Authorities confirmed that many roads throughout northern Serbia have been blocked by snow drifts and like Atlanta – only with actual snow to blame for the problem and not a measly inch or two of light powder – cars are backed up in columns for several miles. Travel warnings were issued, but obviously not heeded by the 1,000-plus people who had to be rescued by the army and emergency services after becoming stuck on a road linking Serbia to Hungary for 15 hours. As the weather worsened and winds gusted as high as 100 mph, the government imposed a total ban on vehicles travelling from Hungary or Romania. A military helicopter was used to rescue nearly two dozen people from their cars on a road about 30 miles northeast of the capital Belgrade, while more than 60 people were stranded in their vehicles overnight. “It is very difficult, even for machinery. The rescuers are walking towards stranded cars,” said Predrad Maric, head of the Serbian Interior Ministry's emergencies department. The scene has been slightly better but still ugly in areas of France and Italy, where heavy rains have flooded riverside towns, including the Italian city of Pisa, where a 30-meter stretch of the city’s medieval wall collapsed as a result of the heavy rain. Take that, Europe……..

- Even history needs an overhaul from time to time. Notre Dame's iconic football stadium is a cathedral of college football, but the structure is a simple and antiquated one in many ways. Smaller and more outdated than the stadiums of so many top programs, the facility will get the sort of upgrade that university officials clearly hope will further increase revenues for the Fighting Irish. The project will create nearly 4,000 premium seats at the stadium while adding three massive buildings at a total cost of $400 million. The Rev. John Jenkins, the university's president, presented the plan in grandiose fashion to the university's board of trustees during their meeting in Rome – yes, that Rome. Jenkins called it "the most ambitious building project in the 172-year history of Notre Dame” and had the stones to suggest that the reason behind the construction is that more space is needed to accommodate Notre Dame's broadening research activity. "What's exciting about this project is it brings together athletics, faculty and academics, research and a student center, so it's an integrated model,'' Jenkins said. Sure thing, Johnny. Everyone knows how much cash your football program generates and if you can boost that revenue while also providing some tangible benefits for the rest of the university, so much the better. Combined, the new buildings will add about 750,000 square feet and will house a student center, the anthropology and psychology departments, a digital media center and music and sacred music departments. The most iconic feature of the area around the stadium, Touchdown Jesus, won't be affected by the new buildings. Two of the new structures will stand on the east and west sides of the stadium and they will rise nine stories and include premium seating, increasing the capacity of Notre Dame Stadium from 80,795 to more than 84,000. The third new building, on the south side of the stadium, will be six stories high and include a hospitality area. With the new student center comes a recreation center, allowing the university to turn the existing Rolfs Sports Recreation Center into the practice home for the men's and women's basketball teams. How is all of this going to be funded? With donations from rich alumni who still believe Notre Dame is an elite football program, of course. And you know the money will come in…….

Italian boulders, "Back to the Future" the musical and another star athlete wants out of Cleveland

- Potholes piss people off. They wreck cars, annihilate alignment systems and break bikes. Winter weather leaves scores of these road pock marks along boulevards and avenues around the world and as any driver or cyclist can attest to, cities and villages don’t always rush out to repair the many potholes in their municipality once the weather warms up. So what’s a person to do if he or she wants to avoid bent rims or a trip to the auto repair shop to spend hundreds of dollars to fix a broken axle? For Levittown, N.Y. resident Bobby Fitzgerald, the answer is simple. You grab your shovel, pick up a bucket of sand and fix the problem yourself. Fitzgerald was inspired to take action after he damaged one of his cars by hitting a pothole. He attempted to get the town to pay for the repairs on his car, but that didn’t end well. "The claims department for the Town of Hempstead refused to pay for the damage on my vehicle," Fitzgerald said. Left to pay for the repairs out of his own pocket, he set out to make sure that neither he nor his fellow motorists had to deal with that issue ever again. When he finds a pothole, Fitzgerald takes a shovel to dig up cracked concrete, a bucket of sand to fill in the hole and a broom to smooth his ghetto-rigged pothole fill mix over. "If I see them, I'll pull over and I'll try to patch up the best way I possibly can," Fitzgerald added. His neighbors have expressed appreciation for his effort, but Hempstead town officials aren't as supportive. "We think it's dangerous, not effective and totally unnecessary," said town spokesman Mike Deery. The first two characterizations may or may not be accurate, but the part about Fitzgerald’s efforts being totally unnecessary are garbage. Town workers clearly aren't out fixing potholes, leaving drivers to dodge them as best they can. The town claims Fitzgerald’s actions are illegal, but officials have no plan to issue him a summons. He says he has no plans to stop, so this standoff will drag on until someone decides to end it……….

- Marty McFly has himself a musical. Three decades after DeLoreans became cool and time travel via car hit the big screen “Back to the Future” is traveling to a place it has never been: the theater. To mark the film's 30th anniversary, the time-travelling classic will debut in London's West End courtesy of director Robert Zemeckis and co-writer Bob Gale. The duo have announced they will write the book for the stage adaption of the 1985 blockbuster that starred Michael J. Fox and Christopher Lloyd. The actors who played McFly and Doc Brown made the first installment of the franchise memorable and it spawned two lesser-loved sequels. In the first film, the pair travelled back to 1955 in a nuclear-powered DeLorean and McFly accidentally altered how his parents met and fell in love while students at the fictional Hill Valley High. While he was stuck in the past, McFly also altered the history of rock and roll by belting out Chuck Berry's 1958 classic “Johnny B. Goode.” Gale said the aim for the stage version is to "true to the spirit of the film without being a slavish remake.” "We intend to use music from the movie along with brand new songs to make a version of Back to the Future that is fresh, entertaining and takes advantage of all the amazing things that can now be done on stage,” Gale said. “We can't think of a better way to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the film." Since becoming a household name in the movie, Fox has won four Golden Globes and five Emmy Awards, but neither Gale nor Zemeckis commented on whether Fox would be involved with the new project. The film's original composer, Alan Silvestri, will score the musical and lyrics will be written by songwriter Glen Ballard………

- Here Cleveland goes again. The most tortured sports city in America – maybe the world for that matter – is used to its best athletes laying down tread on their way out of town the instant they become free agents. LeBron James was the most painful and visible example, but he wasn’t the first and won't be the last. His successor in bolting the Mistake by the Lake could actually be the man who is also his successor as the face of the franchise for the Cleveland Cavaliers. Cavaliers All-Star point guard Kyrie Irving is part of a terrible team that got its ass kicked by 31 points Thursday night by the New York Knicks, but Irving insisted that despite the losing and the reported tensions within the locker room, he does not want out of Cleveland. In fact, Irving insisted he plans to be with the team for "a long time” and is not telling people privately he wants out. "I'm in Cleveland. I enjoy myself. I enjoy going out and competing at the highest level for the Cleveland Cavaliers," Irving said. "It's not about me and it's not about this controversy -- 'Do I privately want out when my contract is up?' I'm still in my rookie contract and I'm happy to be here. And I'm pretty sure I'm going to be here for a long time.” His desire to leave may or may not be real, but there is no question that earlier this season, Irving got into a verbal altercation with teammates during a team meeting following a lopsided loss. He has clashed with backcourt teammate Dion Waiters and there was reportedly a physical altercation involving the two early in the season. On the court, Irving is a starter to this month's All-Star Game and he’s averaging 21.5 points and 6.2 assists for the 16-30 Cavs. His rookie contract runs through next season and the team can offer him an extension on July 1. Should he turn down that extension, July will once again be the month when Cleveland fans begin looking for a ledge to leap from as they wonder once more why their city is so sports snakebitten………

- Thanks for nothing, Neanderthals. Science tells us that many current gene types that influence disease in modern man were picked up through interbreeding with Neanderthals. It’s easy to argue that someone should have kept it in their pants, but Neanderthals weren't known for wearing pants, so that logic doesn’t fly. According to research led by researcher Sriram Sankararaman, these gene variants include those involved in type-2 diabetes, Crohn's disease and smoking addiction. Yes, Neanderthals are part of the reason you see leathery-faced, green-skinned, raspy-voiced smokers huddled outside the doors of office buildings around the United States all winter long, huddled over their cancer sticks for one more puff. Genome studies show that humans mated with Neanderthals after leaving Africa, but until now no one knew what impact that interspecies mating had on humans. Between 2-4 percent of the genetic blueprint of present-day non-Africans allegedly came from Neanderthals, according to the study. The researchers screened the genomes of 1,004 modern humans and identified regions bearing the Neanderthal versions of different genes. One a gene variant associated with a difficulty in stopping smoking was found to have a Neanderthal origin, but the research team cautioned that there is no evidence Neanderthals were lighting up the predecessors to Marlboro Reds. The study also showed that Neanderthal DNA is not distributed uniformly across the human genome and is actually concentrated mainly in regions that affect skin and hair. These variations could have benefitted humans as they adapted to the cooler environments they encountered as they moved into Eurasia. Other Neanderthal influences were found in genomes linked to the regulation of skin pigmentation and the toughness to skin, hair and nails. "It's tempting to think that Neanderthals were already adapted to the non-African environment and provided this genetic benefit to (modern) humans," said study co-author David Reich of the Harvard University Medical School. Neanderthals eventually died off, perhaps proving that man has long been in the business of co-opting what others had going on and then ripping that way of life as their own………..

- Living in northern Italy must be swell, right? Beautiful landscapes are all around, the rolling hills are plentiful and authentic Italian cuisine is a daily staple. Those facts are all legit, but then a boulder comes rolling down the hill and takes out one-fourth of your house and then, life isn't so rosy. That’s how the week went for the Trebo family, which lives in rural Ronchi di Termeno. The family was minding their own business, going about their lives and enjoying being Italian when a massive landslide struck in the nearby mountains. Several massive boulders, estimated at several tons, broke free from the ridges and rolled downhill toward the Trebo home. One boulder stopped just short of the house, but a second boulder had more than enough force and momentum to continue its downward trajectory right through the family’s barn. The boulder wiped out virtually the entire structure, leaving but a few beaten-up beams standing. It found a home in a nearby vineyard, right next to a rock that had been dislodged many years ago. The good news for the Trebo clan is that no one was injured in the incident and the boulder missed striking their house. Such a strike could have been disastrous, given the massive amount of damage it was able to inflict on the barn in a matter of seconds. But such are the perils of owning a beautiful villa next to an Italian mountain and having your own farm and vineyard where you can produce great wine and live in a gorgeous setting that many people who give anything to enjoy………