Drowning migrants, the Nickelhack-Lavigne union ends and Colin Kaepernick's really, really bad day

- Sinister things are afoot in the Mediterranean Sea. More specifically, allegedly evil smugglers watched as  500 Middle Eastern and African migrants were afloat, but struggled and drowned in what witnesses say was no accident. According to a few onlookers who spoke to an international humanitarian agency, smugglers purposely sank their vessel and then laughed as men, women and children slipped below the waves. It seems especially cruel and bad business if one wants others to trust them for successful smuggling ventures in the future, but a few survivors and other witnesses claimed to the International Organization for Migration that the sinking was intentional. The Geneva-based international organization with 156 member countries is probing the claims, which fit with the well-known norms of cruelty that often accompanies desperation of immigrants seeking a better life in Europe. According to witnesses, the angry human traffickers rammed their boat into the crowded vessel carrying the migrants after the travelers refused to transfer to a boat they considered unseaworthy. At that point, sh*t went sour in a hurry. The smugglers are accused of  "throwing metal bars" at the migrants and "laughing" as they struggled to stay afloat in the water, IOM spokesperson Leonard Doyle said. "If survivors' reports are confirmed, this will be the worst shipwreck of migrants in years, not an accidental tragedy, but the apparent deliberate drowning of migrants by criminal gangs who extort money for their desperate journeys. Their actions are as callous as they are evil," Doyle said in a statement. Ten survivors have been confirmed, including a toddler who remains hospitalized in critical condition. A reported 100 children were aboard the vessel, which sank on its way from the port of Damietta in Egypt to Italy………

- San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick didn’t have a great Week 2 of the NFL season. He threw three interceptions, did little as his team squandered a 17-point lead and was all but helpless as they lost 28-20 to the Chicago Bears in a primetime game. But on top of the ignominy of losing a key game, the star signal caller also had to deal with being fined $11,000 by the league after receiving an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty for inappropriate language. The incident occurred early in the fourth quarter when Kaepernick tried to hit Michael Crabtree with a pass on the left that Bears rookie cornerback Kyle Fuller stepped in front to pick off the ball. At the end of the play, Kaepernick and defensive lineman Lamarr Houston began jawing at each other on the sideline and a penalty soon followed. Kaepernick was incredulous at the time and his incredulity only increased after he received his fine from the league office. "The player that I supposedly said something to has been quoted saying I didn't say anything," Kaepernick said. "And I don't know him, so it's not like he would have a reason to just randomly stick up for me." If the alleged target of your verbal rage is backing you up, maybe that’s a sign you’re telling the truth about your innocence. Besides, is there really a need to pile on a guy who was the goat in a horrible come-from-ahead-to-tank loss and take money out of his well-stocked pockets? Show some freaking compassion and stick with forcing him to drop a dollar in the swear jar, NFL………

- Every now and then, someone with too much money and far too generous of a heart pulls a stunt like this. They pull up to a toll both or some other business and they plop down a huge wad of cash to pay for not only their goods or services, but those of dozens of people in line behind them. Such was the case this week in Abilene, Tex., where a magnanimous fast food lover decided that chip in  $1,000 to pick up the tab for diners in dozens of vehicles at the drive-thru lanes of a Chick-fil-A restaurant. According to employees as the fast food joint, the man came through the drive-thru lane and informed the zit-faced high school kid working the garbled intercom system that he wanted to pay for everyone behind him for as long as the cash lasted. Most of the time, those responsible for such acts remain totally anonymous by choice, but this calorie-sharing good Samaritan told employees that his name is John and he just wanted to make everyone's Monday better. He proceeded to fork over 10 $100 bills and according to franchise owner Brian LaCroix, the cash was enough to pay for drive-thru food for people in 88 vehicles over about an hour. The exact identity of the man who bought so many chicken sammitches, chicken bites and fries for the masses remains a mystery, but the thighs, asses and expanding waistlines of everyone who enjoyed the fruits of his generosity will never forget the kindness of this munificent stranger……..

- Dammit. Dammit all to hell and back. If the true, unvarnished and mind-numbingly awful musical union of two total hacks like Avril Lavigne and Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger can't last, then what hope do any of us have to find eternal bliss with another human being? Yes, the Canadian musical equivalent of putting together the smells of a rotting moose carcass and a giant vat of unprocessed human waste is over, as Lavigne and Kroeger are headed for a split after a year of marriage. Multiple sources have confirmed that Kroeger is going around Los Angeles telling people that a divorce is imminent and the split comes about two years after the Nickelhack frontman popped the question to Lavigne after dating for a month. Proposals that come after one month of dating are almost always a solid choice, but this time it didn’t work out. The couple wed in an intimate ceremony in the South of France in July 2013 in an event that surely made one of the coolest wedding destinations in the world seem like tying the knot in the middle of a landfill encircled by seagulls carrying pieces of half-cooked, two-week-old bacon in their mouths as they fly overhead. The wedded bliss continued all the way up through this past July, when Lavigne gushed on Twitter about the 17-carat emerald-cut ring Kroeger gave her for their first wedding anniversary. This is the second failed marriage to a hack-tastic rock star Lavigne has crapped out of, with her union to Sum 41 singer Deryck Whibley lasting a comparatively lengthy four years from 2006 to 2010. Toss in relationships with Brody Jenner and Wilmer Valderrama and it’s becoming clear that ol’ Avril’s taste in men might be the only thing worse than her taste in music………..

Drilling Derek Jeter, the next Bond movie and money for Euro thinkers

- Props to the Tampa Bay Rays for finding an original gift to give to Derek Jeter on his way out the door. Every team in Major League Baseball has trotted out some sort of lame, localized giveaway for The Captain when it has played him for the last time before he retires at the end of the season, but no one has given him something like the Rays dished out Tuesday night. That’s because inexperienced reliever Steven Geltz gave Jeter a nice bruise and welt on his left hand when he dotted the star shortstop with a pitch in the eighth inning. The beanball continued a painful trend of late because the two teams and it was the fifth time a Yankee had been hit by a Ray in the past four games, while the Yankees have not hit any Rays. Jeter has been pegged twice and the Rays also did a hospital job on Chase Headley by hitting him with a pitch on the chin. The multiple hit batters have raised the ire of Yankees manager Joe Girardi, who blew up after the 6-1 loss to the Rays. "If you are going to pitch inside, pitch the right way," Girardi said. "If you can't pitch inside, don't pitch inside. We are not pincushions." In defense of Geltz, he’s in the majors for the first time and was up 0-2 in the count when the 95 mph fastball got away. With a five-run lead, he clearly wouldn’t have been looking to bring an early end to the career of one of the greatest players in the history of the game. "If you are going to pitch inside, learn how to pitch inside," Girardi said. "You pitch down in the zone. You don't pitch up. This is not practice. This is guys' livelihood." Rays manager Joe Madden agreed with some of what his counterpart said, but insisted that the sport “is called baseball; sometimes hitters get hit,” and said there would be no apology……….

- Congratulations to Barcelona, Spain. The unofficial capital of Catalonia has captured the grand prize in a competition that spurs cities to develop novel approaches to improve urban life, contest sponsor Bloomberg Philanthropies announced Wednesday. The city, which just so happens to sit within a massively cash-strapped nation, was awarded 5 million euro ($6.5 million) as top finisher. The four runners-up awarded 1 million euros ($1.3 million) each: the metropolitan area of Kirklees, England, and the cities of Stockholm; Warsaw, Poland; and Athens, Greece. Yes, all of the winners are from Europe and that seems a bit biased, but it’s not as if the winners, selected from 21 finalists, were announced in Paris….oh wait, they were. But the Euros bribed former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg with a trip to Paris so the billionaire businessman-turned-politician’s own personal foundation for innovative ideas that could also potentially spread to other cities could have its black-tie event. "To meet the biggest challenges of the 21st century, city leaders must think creatively and be unafraid to try new things, and the Mayors Challenge is designed to help them do that," Bloomberg said in a statement. Entrants were tasked with dreaming up creative solutions to critical urban issues, such as youth unemployment, aging populations, civic engagement, environment and public health and safety. Barcelona’s proposal aims to boost the quality of life for its expanding elderly population with the creation of a support network that would include relatives, friends, social workers and volunteers. "The Mayors Challenge inspired Barcelona to address the issue of isolation among elderly residents, and this prize will enable us to achieve a more connected and inclusive society,” Barcelona Mayor Xavier Trias said. Stockholm’s near-miss of a plan zeroed in on climate change and the notion of fighting climate change by encouraging residents to produce biochar, an organic material that increases tree growth, isolates carbon and purifies storm runoff. Well done, everyone. You can pick up your ribbon on the way out the door……..

- Bond is back. It doesn’t have a title, but the 24th James Bond film will begin shooting on Dec. 6 and director Sam Mendes will be back, along with leading man Daniel Craig. Craig is a solid choice by virtue of not being Pierce Brosnan and has actually done a serviceable job in the three Bond movies he has starred in. Principal photography will commence on Dec. 6 and Mendes is reportedly preparing Craig and the main cast members for a script read through in late November at Pinewood Studios. Work was originally slated to start in October, but multiple script rewrites set the process back for the sequel to “Skyfall,” which was released in 2012 and is the most successful Bond film yet with more than $800 million in worldwide earnings. What’s interesting about the project at this point is that the movie’s villain hasn’t yet been cast, although the search for Bond’s next archenemy is "focused on someone extremely physically fit and over 6-foot-2," with a decided preference for someone who is a drastic departure from any previous Bond villains. Mendes is reportedly seeking the same sort of physical presence on screen as a villain such as Jaws, who battled Roger Moore's Bond in “The Spy Who Loved Me” in 1977. Having Craig back for his fourth Bond flick is a solid score and he will be joined by Naomie Harris, who reprises her role as Moneypenny, along with Ralph Fiennes as M, Ben Whishaw as Q and Rory Kinnear’s Bill Tanner. The budget is once again immense and the earnings will likely follow suit whether the revised script is good or not, so let’s all buckle in for more fast cars, hot chicks and clichéd lines from 007…….

- What school district doesn’t need a good, solid armored vehicle from time to time? Los Angeles Unified School District police officials have a blessing that any other district would kill for, even if they’re pretending they don’t by “debating” whether they need the armored vehicle and grenade launchers they received from the U.S. military. It’s a good show for the crowds, but no one is buying the idea that LAUSD police officers are going to pass up a chance at a 20-foot-long, 14-ton armored transport vehicles, much like the ones used to move Marines in Iraq combat zones. The gem of a vehicle is worth $733,000, and the school district’s police force got it from the government for free. F-R-E-E. Simply put, if it’s free, it’s for me. One could ask how LAUSD would ever use such a vehicle, but one would be an idiot. “For us? That vehicle would be used for extraordinary circumstances,” LAUSD police Chief Steve Zipperman said. “It’s something that we believe is a life-saving vehicle (and) certainly we realize we need to take a look, is this the best alternative right now for us until we find something else that is more conducive to a police-type of rescue.” Keep pretending, chief. Making the situation all the more kick-ass, the vehicle is stored at a secret location, just like the Batmobile. To top off its arsenal, the district also has a supply of grenade launchers, which it received for free from the military after 9/11. While neither the armored vehicle nor the grenade launchers have ever been used and the district is pretending it might get rid of them, any right-minded human being knows that Zipperman is a poor liar and those weapons are staying right where they are………

Sun Kil Moon rage, fliers for love in NYC and Riot Watch! Brazil

- Riot Watch! Riot Watch! The rage was real and it was intense Tuesday in Sao Paulo, Brazil as housing activists raged against the machine and clashed with police after authorities evicted about 200 families who had illegally occupied an empty hotel. On the surface, kicking squatters out of an abandoned building is a logical step, but not if you ask the activists who engaged in violent clashes in which they hurled rocks and pieces of wood at some of the 250 police troops who showed up give an estimated 200 families the boot. The squatters t had occupied the building's 20 floors for six months, but their stay was terminated with prejudice and that’s when it all went south. The confrontation spilled from the hotel to nearby streets and in front of Sao Paulo's Municipal Theater, where some protesters torched a bus. Setting large vehicles on fire is always a great way to escalate a riot and that’s exactly what happened in this case as riot police fired rubber bullets, tear gas and stun grenades in an effort to disperse the crowd. After the initial burst of outrage, everyone took a brief rest break and calm prevailed for several hours before more violence erupted in central Sao Paulo, with rioters blocking some roads in the region. Television images from the day told a story of young men wearing gas masks and vandalizing nearby businesses and rioters toting homemade wooden shields to fend off rubber bullets. Lt. Col. Mauro Lopes of the Sao Paulo police department said seven people suspected of breaking into a store and of setting the bus on fire had been arrested, with 60 more taken into custody for questioning. The root of this entire mess is a so-called "roofless" movement that organizes poor families to move into abandoned buildings, often in central Sao Paulo……….

- Just because you’re a PED-using cheater who won't be available to his team for the first round of the playoffs doesn’t mean you can't do some good in the world, right suspended Baltimore Orioles slugger Chris Davis? Davis is serving a 25-game suspension for a positive amphetamine test and has apologized for making "a mistake by taking Adderall,” but maybe that Adderall came in handy earlier this week when he came across what witnesses described as a heavy pickup truck overturned on I-295 in Baltimore. Witnesses reported Davis happening on the scene of the accident and leading an effort to unpin a man who was trapped underneath. Fellow motorist Mike Soukup was one of the people who helped Davis after the MLBer waved him and several other drivers over in an effort to help the man trapped under the truck. Soukup noticed that the person leading the rescue effort looked a hell of a lot like a guy hitting a major-league-worst .196 this season and who has struck out 173 times in 127 games. After the makeshift rescue crew successful lifted the truck and freed the person trapped underneath, Soukup addressed Davis by what he thought was his first name and found out that he had guessed correctly. Maybe for the duration of his banishment, Davis should be forced to traverse the roads of the greater Baltimore area, searching for distressed motorist and using his greenie-fueled burst of energy to help them with whatever problem happens to be ailing them at the moment. Perhaps MLB could even knock a game or two off his suspension for it………

- Artists are supposed to be eccentric. They are supposed to be lovelorn folks whose tortured existence often leaves them with the sort of heartbreak that provides them with the necessary fodder to write great songs, pen amazing books or craft beautiful works of art. However, that eccentricity can be taken a bit too far and reach the point of pathetic desperation. That’s where New York City artist Dan Perino is currently residing and his artist’s heart now finds him posting thousands fliers across the city begging for a girlfriend. Many dudes are desperately in search of love, but few try a scattershot approach of public desperation. Maybe that gives Perino an edge as he trudges out into the city every day with a thick stack of fliers bearing his face and a roll of masking tape. He posts his fliers wherever he can and so far, he has put up some 15,000 of them in search of love. Even with the discount a man gets when he wants 15,000 copies of anything, the price tag of 3 cents per flier equals $450 – a small price to pay if one finds true love. “One day, I just woke up and thought, ‘I’m going to post fliers looking for a girlfriend,’” Perino said. “She doesn’t have to be a raging beauty.” On some level, Perino does have standards. He wants a woman who wants children even though he already has one child from a previous marriage. The fliers have netted him 65 dates so far, but none have materialized into anything more serious. His biggest foe in all of this could eventually be the New York City Department of Sanitation, which fines people $75 for posting fliers on public property. Do the math and if all 15,000 of those fliers went up, that could amount to a $1.1 million fine. In a fortunate twist for Perino, many of his fliers have been torn down by cantankerous New Yorkers who just don’t give a sh*t. And so the search for love goes on………

- Sun Kil Moon frontman Mark Kozelek is raging and the world needs to get the hell out of his way or else, be prepared to turn its rings around, take off its chains and fight. One week after nearly inciting a brawl at a gig in North Carolina because he referred to the locals as “f*cking hillbillies” and later tried to claim it was all a joke, Kozelek is at it again except this time, he’s starting fights with other musicians instead of the paying customers. Kozelek was performing at the Ottawa Folk Fest at the same time as The War On Drugs were performing on a different state in the same area and given the brand of mellow, singer-songwriter indie rock he spins, the rockin’ sounds of The War On Drugs simply overpowered what Kozelek had to offer on that stage. In this type of situation, what is an emo-sounding crooner to do? Play on and hope that the audience appreciates his thoughtful brand of music? Hell no. Kozelek instead asked, “Who the f*ck” is that and when someone told him that the band he was so miffed by was The War on Drugs, Kozelek replied: "I hate that beer-commercial lead-guitar shit. This next song is called 'The War On Drugs Can Suck My F*cking Dick.’" He technically did not play a song by that name or with those lyrics and yet, the drama was far from over. The War On Drugs have acknowledged the comments on Twitter and suggested that the original comments may have been made in jest. “Can anyone confirm that mark kozelek was talking shit on us during his set in Ottawa last night? Cuz we obviously booked the schedule....wtf,” the band tweeted. Stay classy, Kozelek………

Reviving The U, the world's first printable 3-D electric car and the "Zoolander" sequel will happen

- Ruh-roh. There is drama in the world’s most romantic nation because not everyone is feeling the love. Specifically, Air France pilots are pissed and their anger is making waves. The airline canceled at least half its flights around the world on Monday as pilots began a weeklong strike, underscoring the difficulties some of Europe’s major carriers face in keeping up with low-cost competitors. Air France-KLM is the national carrier for France and the Netherlands, but its mighty power can ensure no more than 48 percent of flights Monday, 40 percent on Tuesday and perhaps less later in the week because the unions that comprise the bulk of its work face have walked out in protest against its savings program. Air France-KLM and fellow Euro air heavyweights Lufthansa, Alitalia, SAS are trying to make major cost cuts to stay competitive, but they are running up against the wall of strong laws protecting workers' rights. The current wave of contention came last week after Air France announced a plan to save 1 billion euros ($1.3 billion) over the next several years, with the centerpiece of the plan transferring much of its European operations to low-cost subsidiary Transavia. Air France pilots' unions balked at the notion and accused the airline of moving jobs to countries with lower taxes and cheaper labor and saving money by basing planes for France-Portugal flights in Portugal, instead of France. "This is about a project of out-sourcing," said Jean-Louis Barber, the president of the main Air France pilots' union, SNPL. "That's why pilots are angry." It’s reassuring to know that no matter where in the world labor strife exists, the same unimaginative claims are at its epicenter. Air France-KLM continues to pursue its dreams of a fleet of 100 jets by 2017 carrying more than 20 million passengers a year, more than double the current load. For now, those plans are on strike, along with the airline’s pilots and those of Romania's national airline, who also staged a walkout on Monday……….

- There is more to life than being really, really good looking….and starring in absurdist fashion comedies. Just don’t tell Will Ferrell that because he is set to reprise his role as devious fashion mogul Jacobim Mugatu in the long-awaited sequel to Ben Stiller’s 2001 comedy “Zoolander.” The original movie starred Stiller and Owen Wilson as dim-witted male models whose primary skill set was in their limited repertoire of eerily similar facial expressions and despite developing something of a cult following over the years, it never really lived up to expectations at the box office. Similar to Ferrell’s cult favorite project “Anchorman,” the magic of “Zoolander” kept its loyal supporters pushing for a sequel and Justin Theroux, who wrote the screenplay for “Iron Man 2” and co-wrote “Tropic Thunder,” has been working on a script with Stiller for several years. Ironically enough, Theroux may not direct the movie and could leave his director’s chair to Stiller because he has better things to do, namely work on his tepidly received TV show “The Leftovers.” But Ferrell will still be around and he confirmed as much over the weekend. "We are actually supposed to do a read-through of a sequel script soon, and Mugatu is a part of it Ferrell said. The good news for whoever directs “Zoolander” is that a 13-year gap between original and sequel in no way can ramp up expectations for a sequel to wholly unrealistic levels and create an insanely high standard that the sequel could never, ever meet. It’s not as if “Anchorman 2” was an abysmally unfunny disaster that barely resembled the original and left fans asking if there was a way to forget it ever happened………..

- World, we finally have it. And by it, we mean our first 3-D printed electric car that in no way will help any of us not directly associated with making or promoting it. But benefits to humanity or not, history was made at Chicago’s McCormick Place, where that first 3-D printed electric car—named Strati, Italian for “layers” went from wacky concept care with carbon fiber plastic composition to wacky concept care with carbon fiber plastic composition that took its first test drive. “Less than 50 parts are in this car,” said Local Motors spokesman Jay Rogers. Rogers’ company is part of the team that developed the engineering process to manufacture the car and print it with a massive 3-D printer set up at McCormick Place by Cincinnati Incorporated in a shameless promotional ploy. Oak Ridge National Laboratory also collaborated on the concept and this group of visionaries is bold enough to believe that they could actually bring custom printed cars to the marketplace by 2015. “You could think of it like Ikea, mashed up with Build-A-Bear, mashed up with Formula One,” Rogers added. Yes, because when taking a vehicle out on the road and putting oneself in a position where one could die if their vehicle of choice isn't safe, the name one wants to hear attached to said vehicle is Build-A-Bear. Amazingly, the Strati concept originated just six months ago and it eventually made its way to the showroom floor of the International Manufacturing Technology Show. There, visitors got a first-hand look at the body of the car being printed layer by layer over a 44-hour period. Non-printable (unsure how that is acceptable) parts, like the engine, lights and glass windshield were added along the way and now Strati is ready to go – relatively speaking. It can go a mere 40 mph and has a meager range of 120 miles on one charge. Its expected retail price for the bare-hones model that no one actually buys because you actually need sh*t like arm rests, steering wheels and seats is $18,000, but the likelier price points is closer to $30,000……….

- Miami Hurricanes backup quarterback Kevin Olsen is playing for the ‘Canes in the wrong era. His act would have played perfectly 30 years ago, when the Canes were hanging with 2 Live Crew and rolling onto the tarmac at away games wearing battle fatigues. Back then, felonious was the Miami way and braggadocio was their M.O. That would have been the time for Olsen to wear Miami green and orange, at a time when a player could be charged early Monday morning with driving under the influence and having a fake or stolen driver's license and be celebrated, not scorned. As it is, he has been suspended from team activities simply because the school learned that Miami-Dade County jail records showed their fourth-string signal caller being booked at 4:11 a.m. Monday and released on $6,000 bail. According to police, who don’t seem to understand that cops in towns with big college football programs are supposed to look the other way when one of the boys on the team steps over the legal line, Olsen failed field sobriety tests and had five different driver's licenses on him. That’s right, five different licenses. A college kid having a fake ID to get served at an off-campus bar is one thing, but five different licenses is downright shady. The plot only thickens because Olsen is the younger brother of Carolina Panthers tight end Greg Olsen and he’s been in trouble with the law before. In May 2013, he was charged in his hometown of Wayne, New Jersey, with leaving the scene of an accident and failing to report an accident. He’s been suspended twice during his brief Miami career, both for the mysterious violation of team rules. It’s not the path one would have expected from one of the highest-rated prospects in the 2013 class, but Olsen’s biggest problem is simply living in the wrong era……..

NHL floppers, movie news and smelly cabbies

- Professional hockey players are supposed to be among the toughest, most badass athletes in the world. So why the hell does the NHL feel the need to enact new rules strengthening it’s admittedly weak stance on flopping? Sure, soccer needs stronger penalties for flopping because the mulleted, dive-happy divas who populate the beautiful game will go down as if they’ve been shot the instant anyone passes within 15 feet of them on the pitch. Even in the NBA, defenders looking to draw charging fouls rather than actually playing good defense and stopping their man from scoring will take a dive if they think it can earn a favorable call from the officials. But is it really necessary in the NHL, where dudes lose teeth during games and keep playing because that’s what they’re supposed to do? The league must feel flopping is an issue, as it is toughening its penalties for taking a dive, but don’t get carried away. If league officials really were concerned about the impact of flopping on their fine sport, they would implement a policy with actual teeth to it rather than dinging the wallets of offenders for minimal amounts if they dare to fake contact. See, the supplementary discipline penalties associated with Rule 64.3 (Diving/Embellishment) will be revised and fines will be assessed to players and head coaches on a graduated scale….that amounts to pocket change for all involved. For a first offense, players will receive a warning but no fine. Their second offense will net a fine of $2,000, with the amount rising to $3,000 for a third offense, $4,000 four a fourth offense and $5,000 per offense from there. Coaches will be fined on the same graduated scale beginning with the fourth offense by one of their players. Way to bring the hammer, NHL………

- Stoners do lots of stupid sh*t. Witness the scene Sunday in Amsterdam if you doubt the power of high-quality chron to influence people’s willingness to participate in absurdity. In Amsterdam's central Dam square, a group of 2,000 tomato-wielding protesters got together to take part in a messy demonstration to (allegedly) protest Russia's ban on the import of Dutch produce. The plan was to get a sh*t-ton of tomatoes together, charge people $18 to get into the party and allow them to chuck round vegetable at one another in a blatant rip-off of Spain's famed annual "La Tomatina" festival. Organizers purchased 120,000 tomatoes labeled unfit for human consumption for the event and were pretty fired up about it. "We want to support duped Dutch farmers hit by the Russian ban by buying their tomatoes for a good price and staging a fight on September 14," organizer Joep Verbunt said. Sadly, the less-than-balmy weather meant there was none of the half-naked nuttiness that fills the Tomatina festival and that event isn't tagged with the thinly veiled premise of helping people who are suffering due to Vladimir Putin’s ass-hated vendetta against the West. Give some blame for this lame publicity stunt to entrepreneurs who have seized upon Russia's boycott of European produce to put together an event where goggles were recommended but an actual social conscience or knowledge of the issues surrounding the event was not. Most participants showed up eager to dot their friends and total strangers with rotten tomatoes and little else on their minds. The tomato chucking lasted for an hour and all proceeds (allegedly) will go to tomato growers hurt by the sanctions. The good news is that afterward, everyone could find the nearest coffee shop and smoke a nice, big fattie to forget it all…….

- Good deeds were not necessary to win at the box office this weekend. That explains how “No Good Deeds” scared its way to the top of the earnings list in its debut with $24.5 million. It did more than enough to edge out fellow newcomer “Dolphin Tale 2,” which somehow squandered the magical magnificentness of Morgan Freeman’s melodious voice and could do no better than second place with its $16.6 million effort. Both new movies pushed their way past “Guardians of the Galaxy,” which won last weekend but dropped to third this time with $8 million. The superhero blockbuster has banked $305.9 million in domestic earnings through seven weeks and has also done respectably on a global scale. Fourth place went to “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” recipient of $4.8 million in movie dollars for the frame and owner of $181 million overall in six underwhelming weeks of release. “Let’s Be Cops” conjured up enough laughs for $4.3 million on the weekend, giving the overachieving comedy $73 million in five productive weeks of release. The third newcomer in the top 10 was “The Drop,” which opened in limited release (829 theaters) but still garnered $4.2 million to place sixth. “If I Stay” snagged seventh place with $4.1 million in its fourth weekend and with an $11 million budget at its core, the film has turned a tidy profit at $44.9 million in domestic earnings. “The November Man” geezer-fought its way to a $2.8 million weekend and has accrued a measly $22.4 million in three lame weeks. “The Giver” was next in ninth place thanks to a $2.7 million weekend, giving it $41.3 million in its first five weeks in theaters. The final top 10 spot went to “The Hundred-Foot Journey,” it of the $2.4 million weekend earnings and $49.4 million overall in six weeks of mostly limited release. “When the Game Stands Tall” (No. 11), “As Above/So Below” (No. 12) and “Lucy” (No. 13) all lost their top 10 spots from one weekend ago………

- ‘Bout damn time. A smelly problem has pervaded taxicabs all around the world for far too long and thankfully, someone is finally taking action. Cab drivers tend to have a certain, um, scent about them and that can make for an uncomfortable ride for their passengers. The powers that be at San Diego International Airport know all too well how real this problem is and it explains why body odor is among 52 criteria that officials use to judge taxi drivers. While that’s a long list, let’s just remember what it’s like to be trapped in the back seat of a cab with a stank-ass driver for half an hour and then reconsider the situation. After that, we can all universally condemn accusations by leaders of the United Taxi Workers of San Diego union who claim that the new standards are prejudicial and discriminatory while also perpetuating a nasty stereotype that predominantly foreign-born taxi drivers smell bad. Just for shits and giggles, let’s take a look at what else is on the list. There are also entries for proof of insurance, functioning windshield wipers, adequate tire treads and good brakes. What’s worse still for defenders of odoriferous drivers is that they won't be fired, suspended or even told to go home for the day if they are found to be nasally offensive. They will merely be told to change their clothes before picking up another customer. Airport authority spokeswoman Rebecca Bloomfield admitted there is “no standard process” to testing, but there doesn’t need to be because there is no such thing as a B.O. meter. The airport authority insists it is enforcing a policy of the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System, which regulates taxis throughout the region, and that should be enough……

Yemen rage, Rory McIlroy under attack and Six Californias is DOA

- “Fight Club” was a huge hit, so maybe returning to that same well will yield another big win. James Franco clearly hopes so after he acquired the film rights to “Fight Club” author Chuck Palahniuk’s “Rant.” Franco has been a busy man of late even if those films keeping him busy have mostly been ridiculous – his Oscar-nominated performance in “127 Hours” not withstanding – and he now has his grubby hands on “Rant” with an eye toward playing the leading role. He will portray Buster Rant Casey, "a murderous demolition driver who takes part in the Party Crashing derby in a world where people intentionally crash into each other violently to feel, and create a vivid reality of the experience.” It’s a different take on the concept of therapeutic violence than the fisticuffs of “Fight Club,” but the basic principle holds. Playing a an described as a “murderous demolition driver” might test Franco’s ability to go beyond his recent doofus roles, but he should get plenty of help from Pamela Romanowsky, who is set to write and direct the film. The two previously partnered on the film “Adderall Diaries,” which wasn’t exactly a big-budget project bit did earn a fair amount of critical praise. Franco’s latest film, “The Sound and the Fury,” premiered at the Venice Film Festival earlier this month and Franco received a filmmaking aware at the event for "an original contribution to innovation in contemporary cinema” and for his efforts as "a relentless ‘manufacturer’ of cultural imagery.” Yes, that was every bit as pompous as it sounds……….

- Six Californias is dead before it could really come to life. The controversial “Six Californias” initiative was a pipe dream of venture capitalist Tim Draper for months now, but Draper’s idea that the state is simply too large to govern effectively was not winsome enough to earn a spot on the 2016 ballot. The Secretary of State’s office announced this week that the initiative did not have enough valid signatures when officials completed the standard random sampling of petition signatures. That means the proposal to split California into six smaller states won't be happening any time soon. That’s welcome news for OneCalifornia co-founder Steve Maviglio, whose group formed with the sole purpose of stopping Draper’s idea from becoming a reality. “Well, if it somehow miraculously gets on the ballot, we’ll file a lawsuit immediately. We believe it’s unconstitutional,” Maviglio said. Under the plan, six sovereign states would have formed and one of those conveniently would have been the wealthy state of Silicon Valley, including San Francisco and San Jose. The current capital city of Sacramento would have been bundled together with Marin County to form a northern California state, while Los Angeles, San Diego and Riverside would’ve anchored three other states. The sixth, hippie-friendly state would have encompassed the extreme northern portion of what is currently a singular California. Draper and others who backed the “Six Californias” initiative submitted more than 1.1 million signatures, but that wasn’t enough. The California Secretary of State’s office said “the total number of signatures … filed with all county elections officials is less than 100 percent of the number of qualified voters required to find the petition sufficient.” Davis disputes that claim and said his organization will conduct a review of the signatures determined to be invalid by the registrars in several counties to determine if they were in fact valid signatures. Keep that dream alive, you elitist ass hat………

- Did I say something? Why is everyone mad at me? Both are questions currently being asked – at least publicly – by the best golfer in the world. Rory McIlroy won two majors this year and is the top-ranked player in the world, which should earn him some leeway when it comes to commenting on the state of the sport he currently rules. Yet when the Northern Irishman made comments about Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson being on the "last few holes'' of their careers, the backlash was swift and severe. Prior to the Tour Championship at East Lake Golf Club, McIlroy was asked if Woods and Mickelson failing to qualify for the event signaled a new era in golf. "They're just getting older. Phil's [44] or whatever he is and Tiger's nearly 40 (39 in December). So they're getting into the sort of last few holes of their career. And that's what happens. You get injured,” McIlroy said. “Phil has to deal with an arthritic condition as well. So it obviously just gets harder as you get older. I'll be able to tell you in 20 years how it feels.'' It was an eye-catching comment wrapped in a sandwich of realistic observations of fact and yet, all anyone heard was a young punk shoveling dirt on the coffins of two all-time greats while they’re still playing. Woods and Mickelson have combined to win 19 major championships and 121 PGA Tour titles, but both are absent from the Tour Championship for the first time since 1992. Nothing McIlroy said was unduly harsh or wrong and he admitted that the reaction to his words caught him off guard. "I was going through Twitter last night and it was like, 'Hold on here, did I say something bad here? I don't think I did,' " McIlroy said the day after his initial remarks. "I know Tiger and Phil really well. I get on really well with both guys. I've said much worse to Tiger before. "I felt like I had to clarify what I said. I thought I was very complimentary.” True, there are a lot of people looking for headlines and drama sells, but pretending that McIlroy just took out his golf glove and smacked two icons across the face because he can is almost as ridiculous as the idea that Woods is still the best player in the world………

- Yemen is a happy place right now. Who wouldn’t be happy if their country were immersed in non-stop turmoil pitting the government against a rebel group hell-bent on overthrowing said government and enforcing its strict agenda on the nation? The principals in this one are the Yemeni government and a Shiite-rebel group, known as Hawthis. The two sides were close to an agreement to resolve their issues through an international mediator, but that agreement is in serious doubt after Yemeni military officials confirmed that army troops clashed with Shiite rebels who have been demonstrating for weeks demanding the government reinstate fuel subsidies and resign. The weekend riots broke out in a northwestern district of Sanaa, the capital, near a state TV building, when troops stopped a rebel truck loaded with weapons. Rebels are clearly very fond of their weapons and when the attack took place, the sh*t hit the fan quickly and violently. The military did not report casualties, but said the area was now secured by army vehicles and troops. The timing could not have been worse given the amount of violence and tension that has soaked the sands of Yemen for months and a cynic might argue that the attack was actually just what the rebels wanted – at least those opposed to the proposed agreement. Unless that agreement is going to be signed with gunfire and sealed with the blood of those who continue to clash for and against what it stands for, any lasting peace may take a while longer……..

Umbrella guns on college campuses, when PEDs don't help and Odd Future's new radio station

- Is that an umbrella in your backpack or are you about to launch a deadly hail of bullets on our quaint little campus? That question could have avoided a lot of drama this week at Indiana University Southeast, where the school of about 6,500 students and 500 faculty and staff went on full-scale lockdown after a student reported seeing a man walking on campus with a backpack that had a weapon sticking out of it. As eyewitnesses tend to be largely unreliable, it should surprise no one that police later determined the weapon was actually an umbrella. According to a school spokesperson, the initial report of a weapon was made by a student around 12:30 p.m. The campus was immediately placed on lockdown and everyone was advised to take shelter and stay in place. For nearly 90 minutes, students and staff followed those orders behind locked doors and some even erected makeshift barricades in their classrooms and auditoriums. Police flocked to the campus and searched for the mystery man with the umbrella gun in his bag, blocked entrances and searched the entire campus before locating the man fitting a description given by the student who called in the potential threat. It was particularly terrifying because the incident occurred on Sept. 11, but there was no substance to the threat and New Albany police were eventually able to declare the emergency over and give the all-clear for everyone to emerge from their hiding places and get on with their day. In the aftermath of this incident and given that IUS was on lockdown in December under similar circumstances, with police looking for another person suspected of having a gun that turned out to be a wooden theater prop, now might be an opportune time for a campuswide seminar to help folks identify what an actual gun looks like……….

- Performance-enhancing drugs do not always work. If they did, Baltimore Orioles first baseman Chris Davis would be ending his regular season with much better numbers than a .197 batting average with 26 homers and 72 RBIs. Instead, Davis and his 173 strikeouts will sit out the final 17 games of the regular season and as many as eight postseason game after he was suspended 25 games for using amphetamines. The ban came down Friday with the Orioles leading the AL East by 10 games with 17 left in the regular season, so the team could be without the 2013 home run champion into the second round of the playoffs if it advances that far. Popping greenies has long been a part of professional sports for athletes looking to stay up and stay high-energy over the course of a long season, but Major League Baseball has made a point of cracking down on their use in recent years and Davis becomes the latest to run afoul of the league. Maybe somewhere along the course of a difficult season and with his numbers sagging as his team was breaking free in its division race and looking like one of baseball’s best teams, Davis felt like he was letting the Orioles down or risking his spot in the lineup with his poor performance at the plate. Perhaps those feelings led him to do something regrettable and in turn, than led MLB to announce that he would be suspended without pay "after testing positive for an amphetamine in violation of Major League Baseball's joint drug prevention and treatment program." Never have those 53 home runs he hit last season seemed further in the rearview mirror or more suspect than they do right now……..

- Don’t forget about Catalonia. Scotland is days from a landmark vote for independence, with most polls placing the numbers at nearly 50-50 in terms of those opposing and supporting independence. The numbers likely skewed much higher this week in Barcelona when hundreds of thousands of Catalans packed the streets of the city to demand the right to vote on separation from Spain. Protestors dressed in red and yellow and lined two of the city’s main roads, forming a human “V” to signify their desire to vote on the issue. Many in the crowd also wore T-shirts saying “Ara es l’hora,” or “Now is the time,” in the Catalan language on Catalonia’s national day. The actual number of protestors is up for debate, but Barcelona police estimated that as many as 1.8 million took part, while a central government spokeswoman put the figure at around half a million. Catalonia regional leader Artur Mas was at the forefront of the anti-Spain rage, proclaiming that his government is not wavering from plans to hold a Nov. 9 referendum in the region of 7.6 million people. Most legal experts say any attempt is certain to be blocked by Spain’s Constitutional Court, but that didn’t deter event organizer Carme Forcadell, head of the National Catalan Assembly. “We want a say in politics and our future,” Forcadell said. “I ask Spain’s institutions and especially its government to take good note of the mood on Catalonia’s streets.” Not only is the high court expected to block any referendum, but Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy has vowed to stop the vote because Spain’s constitution does not allow referendums that don’t include all Spaniards. Mas and his supporters disagree and believe their issue is one of the biggest facing the government. Catalans have drawn encouragement from Scotland’s campaign for independence and a recent government poll showed support for an independent state had more than tripled to 45.2 percent in March. Another poll indicated that an additional 20 percent would support an independent state and another 23 percent would get behind an autonomous region. Breaking free is never easy and this fight is already contentious, but both sides appear ready to brawl on this one………

- All great endeavors begin with a chance for both transcendent success and abject failure. Odd Future hasn’t exactly grasped greatness in the early years of their hip-hop career, but it hasn’t been for a lack of trying. The group, fronted by Tyler, The Creator, has caught the ear of some of rap’s biggest stars and also plumbed the depths of disaster by fighting its own fans at shows. The latest Odd Future endeavor has a much better chance of avoiding fisticuffs than a live show and could actually produce great results if Odd Future are willing to put in the time and effort and find the right people to surround themselves in order to succeed. The project is a  24-hour online radio station launched in conjunction with Dash Radio. The first broadcast took place Thursday night and Odd Future manager Christian Clancy explained the thinking behind the endeavor. "Basically a 24/7 commercial free station for their shows, their shit, their friends and music they like... live show on Tuesdays, specials... whatever they come up with. Could be absolutely amazing or a complete disaster,” Clancy said. The timing of the station’s debut syncs nicely with the group’s own music festival, which will take place in a few weeks with Pharrell Williams and Tyler, The Creator set to headline and Rick Ross, Mac Miller and Earl Sweatshirt also set to play the third-annual Camp Flog Gnaw event at The Park at the Coliseum in Los Angeles. The festival should be a nice setting for some blatant and shameless cross-promotion……….

Urine-soaked Vegas fame, hating on free U2 music and when the Boston Red Sox suck

- The Boston Red Sox suck right now. They're not used to that feeling and with that feeling coming the year after they won the World Series, it stings even more than it otherwise would. Sitting at 63-83 and mired in last place in the American League East, the Sox are seeking answers and chairman Tom Werner sounds like a man willing to go to the extremes to find them. "I wouldn't say that we have limitless money, but we've got a lot of money to spend and we're determined to go into the free-agent market and improve the team," Werner said. He also labeled the current season a “nightmare” that could well inspired a megadeal for a team that saved more than $200 million in future payroll in a blockbuster trade last season with the Los Angeles Dodgers. Werner knows that his team needs to add "some front-line pitching talent" and plenty more hitting in the offseason and is ready to begin the hunt. "I think that our trades at the end of July attacked the fact that we had a lack of offense. But we know we need some front-line pitching talent." One possibility, ironically enough, is free-agent lefty Jon Lester, whom the team traded to the Athletics at the July 31 deadline after failing to come to terms on a long-term deal. Of course, Werner may need to win over owner John Henry, who has made it clear that he wants no part of high-priced, long-term deals on players who will be past their prime toward the end of the contracts. "Last year, as we all know, was just a dream. This year is a nightmare," Werner said. Good idea, T. Lead with that and maybe you can win the boss over………

- It’s getting real in Scotland ahead of next week’s landmark vote on independence. Business leaders have weighed in, politicians have made their voices heard and folks on both sides of the issue have lashed out at the other side’s case for or against breaking free from the United Kingdom. But with the vote less than one week away, those who matter most are throwing their weight around in an effort to influence the proceedings. Yes, those who hold the purse strings hold a big hammer in their hands and thus, when Scotland's leading banks warned Thursday that they would move their headquarters to England if Scots vote to leave the United Kingdom, it cast serious aspersions over the vote. Existing doubts about the territory's economic future and questions about the fate of the Scottish independence campaign were intensified just days ahead of a historic referendum. The announcement came despite the fact that the banks admitted that the contingency plans are legal procedures that would have a minimal effect on their operations and jobs in Scotland, worrywarts are still in a mini-panic as they fret over their country’s ability to retain businesses — particularly during the long months of financial uncertainty that would follow a vote to break the 307-year union with England. The Royal Bank of Scotland has been based there since 1727, but claims it is willing to jump ship because of uncertainties that could hurt its business and customers if the Sept. 18 vote leads to independence. Ditto for Lloyds Banking Group, which also owns Halifax. Oh, and there is still no decision on what currency an independent Scotland would use, how much U.K. public debt it would take on and who would regulate Scottish banks. All issues one should tidy up before starting their own independent nation……..

- Who isn't a fan of free music from one of the biggest rock bands of all-time? Indie rockers Bombay Bicycle Club, that’s who. Maybe the English quartet really does have concerns over the “invasive” manner in which U2 released its new album “Songs of Innocence” on Tuesday….or maybe these emo whiners are just bitter than Bono and friends gave away more money in a single day than they’ll make in their entire dive bar-dwelling careers. For those who don’t know, U2 teamed with Apple to release the album for free through the iTunes store…to anyone with an Apple ID. Bombay Bicycle Club denounced the process as invasive because Apple put the album on all their subscribers' iTunes automatically. “Songs of Innocence” was uploaded onto 500 million account holders' iTunes on Tuesday and Bombay Bicycle Club guitarist Jamie MacColl joined the chorus of those who decried the move as stepping across a digital line. "I thought the move was quite invasive. A lot of people are up in arms because they don't like U2. I don't have an opinion on the band itself, but I do think the method is a little bit in your face,” MacColl said. Hey Jamie, there is a term for people who don’t like U2: Wrong. MacColl and his mates can raise all the stink they want about users paying closer attention to the agreement deals they sign when buying Apple products, but they need to keep U2’s name out their mouth. "When you sign up to use an Apple product, you’re giving them your information, so this album is part and parcel of that. But that still doesn’t mean they need to use that information in such an invasive way,” MacColl added. He and his bandmates should be thrilled that their second album, “So Long, See You Tomorrow” was well-received and they should wish that 500 million people who have a chance to hear it………

- Getting what you want in life sometimes requires that a person take drastic measures. Sometimes, a man has to go on a six-day drug bender than concludes with him crashing his 10-year-old pickup truck through the glass doors of a Las Vegas landmark before the world will give him hi due and no one has to tell Ryan Brown that. Brown wanted his 15 minutes of fame, the world refused to give it to him and so he took matters into his own hands – and veins – by channeling his inner Hunter S. Thompson for nearly a week and then crashing his 2004 Ford F-150 into the front doors of the Stratosphere, located on Sin City’s iconic Strip. According to a police report, Brown drove his truck with California license plates through the casino’s doors around 8 p.m. because he wanted to be famous. The first clue that he might not be of right mind – aside from willingly driving his ride into a building – came when police arrived on the scene and he spun a rambling table about working as an electrician for Burning Man and sharing a birthday with Elvis Presley. Burning Man is a counterculture festival in northern Nevada and no one from the festival has confirmed Brown’s employment. However, this headline-seeker does share a birthday with Elvis and the King surely would have appreciated Brown’s taste for grandiose gestures. Prior to the crash, Brown was seen arguing with a pedestrian in the valet area and to top off a truly memorable evening, the officers who responded to the scene found Brown’s shirt and shorts soaked, with this Champion of Courageous Acts informing them that he had urinated on himself………..

Taylor Swift v. Katy Perry, human vs. smart voters and SMU football under fire

- Organized crime and corruption are alive and well in Bosnia. Perhaps more of the alive part than being well at the moment, but just because Bosnian police have arrested 14 people, including three politicians, in an organized crime and tax evasion case in which they allegedly skimmed a regional budget of nearly $7.6 million is no reason to throw in the towel in graft. Sure, Bosniak-Croat agricultural minister Jerko Ivankovic-Lijanovic, his father and three brothers — one of whom is a state parliament lawmaker — were among those arrested, but don’t miss the point. There will always be more lawmakers willing to sell what little is left of their souls in order to pad their bank accounts and there will always be shady characters willing to fill those coffers with cash. That’s doubly true in a nation divided into two regions — one run by Serbs, the other shared by Bosniaks and Croats — that are linked by a central government. With multiple ethnic groups armed with competing views on how to run their country, conflicts are bound to abound and when they do, there will be people looking to circumvent justice and do a legislative end-around to achieve their desired result. This latest round of arrests was particularly uplifting because it also included the Bosniak-Croat minister of trade and eight others and according to the state prosecutor's office, the 14 are suspected of registering companies that imported, produced and processed meat and then fictively liquidating them without paying taxes. It may not be the most imaginative and innovate crime of corruption to date, but given time these scumbags could have done something big………

- Eric Dickerson may have been one of the worst sideline reporters in the history of televised football, but that isn't stopping him from foisting his terrible opinions on the world. The former SMU running back and Pro Football Hall of Famer doesn’t have much to do these days other than make public appearances and give interviews in which he goes into Bitter Old Man mode and that’s exactly what he did during a radio interview in Dallas earlier this week. The Mustangs are 0-2 and have been outscored 88-6 in their first two games, leading arguably the greatest player in program history to issue a totally absurd ultimatum to his alma mater. "I talked to four former players yesterday, and we all said if they don't want to do anything, just kill the program," Dickerson said. "Just stick to academics and basketball and kill that program. It's so frustrating for us to watch SMU become nothing but a laughingstock or almost non-existent. It's almost like it doesn't exist." Interestingly enough, Dickerson could actually do something about the problem that seems to be such a huge concern for him. See, coach June Jones abruptly resigned Monday just two games into the season and that leaves a void that Dickerson and his zeroes and zeroes of years of head coaching experience could fill. Hell, Dickerson has that third-place finish in the 1982 Heisman Trophy balloting to his credit and a successful NFL career, so he obviously could help turn around a program struggling as mightily as it has at any point since it returned after being dealt the "Death Penalty" by the NCAA in 1986. He even has a blueprint in mind for fixing SMU and it’s not too far down the road – literally. "I look at TCU, and TCU is a great school. I look at TCU and SMU. ... TCU has got it," said of area rival TCU, which has become a credible program on a national level in recent years……….

- How did this possibly fail? Someone with enough of an innovative, forward-thinking mind to change his name from a mostly normal moniker to human — with a lowercase "H'' — with no middle or last name and then try to use that lame publicity stunt to win a spot in the state legislature cannot possibly fail in said electoral quest….right? Sadly, it can fail and it did when the man formerly known as David Montengero – real name and not his porn name - lost his bid to run for office in New Hampshire this week. Not only did human lose, but he failed to even make it out of the local primary election when he lost to incumbent Democratic state Rep. Rose Marie Rogers by a count of 181-30. A 6-to-1 ratio of votes for the other candidate is a fairly ironclad mandate and it’s not difficult to see why voters elected to keep their current representative and not send human to the state capital to represent them. After all, human earned himself some quality headlines earlier this year when the state's highest court ruled he could have a vanity license plate that reads COPSLIE. The Division of Motor Vehicles would not allow the vanity plate because it ruled the message denigrated police officers, which was clearly a faulty decision. After all, the unwanted scrutinty and payback from police who pulled him over just to pull him over and make his life a living hell would have been well worth it. Maybe voters in Rochester will have another chance some time down the road to elect human to office, or mankind, or guy, or dude, or whatever the hell this kook is calling himself at that point……..

- It’s the battle of Artificial Sugary Sweet Pop Diva vs. Artificial Sugary Sweet Pop Diva Who Used to Sing Quasi-Country Music and the winner is….anyone not paying attention. The fight is one between pop creations Taylor Swift and Katy Perry over one of them – it’s tough to tell them apart at this point – stealing the other one’s backup dancers. As the sordid story goes, three of Swift’s backup dancers bolted her tour and joined Perry’s, which you clearly do not do in the pop music world because….well, because. Swift reportedly felt betrayed because she had a close bond with the dancers and considered them to be part of her extended family, but the dancers were merely returning to Perry after working with her several years ago. As tours do, that Perry trek came to an end and the dancers needed someone to shimmy and shake behind. They linked up with Swift and all was well…until Perry went back on tour and wanted them with her. The good news is that the dancers followed backup dancer etiquette and told Swift up front that they did not want to commit to her entire tour and wanted a 30-day opt-out clause because they were looking to rejoin Perry’s crew. Either Swift has terrible short-term memory or she doesn’t hear well because when the situation unfolded just as the dancers expected, she was so angry that she fired all three of them on the spot. That drama sparked a feud that has continued for nearly a year and as Swift seems to do with all of the negative sh*t that happens in her life, she wrote a song about it. The track “Bad Blood” is about the cat fight and Perry retaliated with a tweet likening Swift to “Mean Girls” star Regina George………

Buffalo saves its Bills, Norway v. Hungary and a "Minority Report" TV show

- The Colossus has a little less clout today. That would be the iconic Colossus roller coaster at Six Flags Magic Mountain in California and the legendary ride took a big hit this week that throws a massive wrench into its just-started renovation process. The Los Angeles County Fire Department was called to the scene at the amusement park in Santa Clarita just after 1:30 p.m. after a fire of unknown origins broke out. The ride was closed three weeks ago for renovations, but when Fire Inspector Scott Miller and his crew showed up, they found a coaster in need of even more work. An elevated portion of the roller coaster’s wooden track was charred black and Twitter photos from the scene showed a plume of smoke rising from the top of a hill in the middle of the ride. Several fire engines responded to the scene and firefighters worked to put out the blaze, a task that was easier because the park was closed Monday. The fire may derail or alter plans for a new hybrid coaster that was to replace the original wooden one after it ceased operating in mid-August after 36 years. The new hybrid ride was to be called Twisted Colossus and upgrade the old version, which dropped 100 feet and reached speeds of up to 60 mph. Prior to the fire, contractors had been working on disassembly of the ride when the top of the hill caught fire, the park confirmed on Twitter. Heat equipment was being used at the time. . “Colossus is currently undergoing a transformation and has been closed since August 17.” Despite the blaze, the park expects the renovation process to remain on schedule and for the new coaster to open on time………

- Who hasn’t been clamoring for a TV spin-off of a 12-year-old sci-fi movie known as “Minority Report”? Those non-existent cries for entertainment help have mercifully been answered with the revelation that Steven Spielberg's Tom Cruise-starring flick will get a TV reboot more than a decade after it hit theaters in 2002. The movie was loosely based off a Phillip K. Dick short story set in a truly dystopian place known as Washington, D.C. in 2054. Cruise starred as a Pre-crime detective who worked with beings known as Precogs, which were beings capable of seeing the future and identifying crimes before they happened. Cruise would then arrest those who were able to be responsible for a crime they never actually got a chance to commit. Paramount and Spielberg's Amblin Television will team with 20th Century Fox Television to develop a pilot for the show, with “Godzilla” (one of the 8 million remakes of that franchise in the past decade) scribe Max Borenstein lined up to write a story that begins after the Precrime project is shut down. Reports from behind the scenes at Paramount have revealed that the pilot will tell the story of one of the Precogs who attempts to lead a normal human life, but cannot shake his disturbing visions of the future. He then meets a detective ironically haunted by her past who may hold the answer for what he should do with his visionary gift now that the program has been shut down. Paramount is in the business of reviving forgotten movies for TV show remakes these days, with plans for new small-screen takes on the “Terminator” franchise and Jim Carrey film “The Truman Show” also in the works……….

- It’s Hungary v. Norway in a European battle of European diplomatic ducking, dodging and diving as Hungary tries to do its own thing and its European Union neighbors insist that it actually, ya know, act like a democracy. The latest chapter came Tuesday when Norway denounced Hungarian police raids on the offices of civic groups critical of the government as unacceptable and showed Hungary is distancing itself from European democratic norms. Police have been scrutinizing several civic groups that distribute or receive funds from the Norway Grants, a program providing money to projects in areas such as environmental protection or social development in Hungary and other less-developed EU countries, which is a nice way of saying they're getting paranoid about outside influences. Hungary’s government tells a different story, one of the groups it is persecuting misusing the money and spending some of it on anti-government activities. Sure, one of the civic groups has admitted to organizing anti-government protests with funds from the Norway Grants, but this isn't exactly a violent coup. Furthermore, the government's complaints have been aimed mostly at groups like Hungarian Civil Liberties Union, corruption watchdog Transparency International Hungary and Atlatszo (Transparent), a group of investigative journalists. According to the HCLO, the most recent raids occurred after investigations earlier this year by the Government Control Office (KEHI) against Norway Grants' recipients failed to find any evidence of wrongdoing. "The aim is clearly to intimidate civil society and silence critical voices," the HCLU said in a statement. Vidar Helgesen, Norway's minister for European affairs, denounced the raids as  "unacceptable" and said they represented the "harassment of civil society organizations." Don’t look for this one to escalate into the next world war…….

- Good news, Buffalo. Stop and savor those three words because let’s face it, there is rarely much good news in a frozen tundra of a city where winter lasts 10 months and there isn't much to celebrate from a professional or college sports standpoint. But today, there is reason to rejoice because those moneyed, A-list outsiders have been rebuffed and one of your own will soon own your beloved NFL team. After a prolonged sale process, Buffalo Sabres owners Terry and Kim Pegula reached a sale agreement with the Buffalo Bills on Tuesday to purchase the team from the Wilson family. Legendary Bills owner Ralph Wilson passed away earlier this year and the race to buy the team from his family was narrowed down to the Pegulas, billionaire real estate mogul Donald Trump and rocker Jon Bon Jovi. Bills fans recoiled at the notion of Bon Jovi buying the team because of his ties to a Toronto-based investment group that fans feared would move the team to Canada. There are no such fears with the Pegulas, who insist they have no plans to move the team. "Kim and I are humbled and honored that the Wilson family has chosen us to be the second owner of the Buffalo Bills," the statement read. "Our interest in owning the Bills has everything to do with the people of Western New York and our passion for football. We have knowledgeable, dedicated fans here and along with our ownership of the Buffalo Sabres, it is gratifying to reassure these great fans that two franchises so important to our region are both here to stay." NFL owners are expected to approve the sale at their next owners meeting on Oct. 8, officially clearing the way for the first ownership transfer in Bills history. Wilson brought professional football to Buffalo in 1959 and now, his beloved franchise will change hands for a reported $1.4 billion that should buy his family a private jet that can take them to a much warmer climate……….

Tunisia needs you, Sun Kill Moon hates hillbillies and when Tasing goes wrong

- Most basketball fans aren't making any effort to follow the FIBA World Cup, so does it really matter of one of the participating teams isn't exactly going all-out to win games? In case you’re one of those who hasn’t tuned in, the World Cup brought together 23 of the best basketball teams in the world – and the B-list squad of guys who didn’t have anything better to do that the United States brought to Spain for the tournament – and the event is now down to the final eight teams. One of the team that tried but failed to make it to the quarterfinals is Australia, but their elimination wasn’t for lack of trying…by not trying. See, the World Cup schedule determines which teams will play in the elimination rounds by their position in the group stage portion of the tournament. Finish in fourth place in Group D and you play the corresponding team from Group C…and so forth. Entering their final group stage game, the Aussies were in an awkward position. If they won, they would play the aforementioned Americans in the round of eight. That would mean a certain exit and rather than lose and take their party back home, the Australians (allegedly) took a different approach. Depending on whom you ask, the Australian team tanked its game against Angola, losing 91-83. After seeing the game unfolded, FIBA said "it is widely suspected that Australia lost" on purpose and launched an investigation. According to the organization, "on-court behavior ... generated huge disappointment by basketball fans and experts." The result enraged Phoenix Suns and Slovenia star Goran Dragic, whose team dropped into the spot Australia tanked to avoid. Dragic took to Twitter to blast the Aussies, tweeting, “Basketball is a beautiful sport, there is no room for fixing the game like today Australia vs Angola!! @FIBA should do something about that!” Australia’s plan failed before it could reach the semifinals when it lost 65-64 to Turkey on Sunday and was eliminated from the tournament. Loss or not, Basketball Australia has been ordered by FIBA to "state its case" before a decision on possible disciplinary sanctions…….

- Mind your Taser, bro. It’s a valuable lesson for anyone owning a Taser of any vintage, but especially police officers for whom a stun gun is part of the standard equipment for a day on the job. That lesson would have served one particular Pulaski, Ark. deputy well after he was stunned with his own Taser during a struggle with a man resisting arrest at Highway 365 and Dixon Road south of Little Rock. The deputy was pursuing suspect Marcus Venson after Venson was accused of pointing a gun at another man. According to Lt. Carl Minden of the Pulaski Police Department, Venson was "drive-stunned" by a deputy with a Taser, meaning Taser cartridge probes are not released, but a painful jolt is delivered to force compliance. At some point during the struggle, Venson was able to battle through the pain and wrest the Taser away from the deputy. Once he got the gun, he knew what to do with it and fired it, with one of the probes striking the deputy in the face just below the eye. Venson tried to Tase a second deputy, but missed and the two deputies were able to take back the Taser and drive-stun the suspect three more times before subduing him. The fight left both deputy and suspect in need of medical attention and both were treated at a hospital and released. The entire saga began earlier that evening when police received a complain alleging that Venson had behaved in a threatening manner toward another man. As it turned out, this upstanding citizen has a reputation around his neighborhood for carrying a weapon and using drugs, which seems totally out of character, but nonetheless prompted police to act. Around 10 p.m., a deputy attempted to apprehend Venson and from there, sh*t got real……..

- Sun Kil Moon's Mark Kozelek is not always the most audience-friendly artist. With a well-earned reputation for being eclectic, aloof and eccentric, Kozelek has done his best to build a barrier between himself and fans despite his immense songwriting talents and musical gifts. His latest bit of performance art during a show at the Hopscotch Festival in Raleigh, N.C. should definitely help in not only keeping that barrier intact, but extending it even further – much, much further. It appears Kozelek was not enamored with the behavior of the audience at the Lincoln Theatre and when some members of the audience got a bit too interactive, he decided it was time to put them in their place. According to witnesses, Kozelek stopped the show and traded verbal barbs with several members of the audience. During his mini-rant, he may have stepped over the line when he described the audience as "fucking hillbillies" and told people to "shut the fuck up" so he could get on with his set and get the hell out of their Bumpkinville of a town. "I don't give a fuck if I get paid or not, I'm gonna walk,” Kozelek allegedly threatened at one point. The actual intent of those words is up for debate, with Kozelek later claiming that his remarks were intended as a joke and nothing more. That viewpoint was not shared by at least one member of the audience who snapped an Instagram photo of graffiti left outside the venue featuring the words "Sun Kil Moon Go Fuck Yourself." This would not be the first time an artist and his fans have had a difference of opinion over a show, but Mark Kozelek, mellow indie singer-songwriter with a knack for storytelling ballads and lengthy sonic opuses verbally sparring with a crowd of angry North Carolinians is a far cry from Tyler, The Creator of Odd Future being on the verge of fighting an entire crowd of enraged hip-hop fans at the SXSW festival in Austin. Maybe Kozelek needs to mix in some hot yoga or meditation before his sets, or he could always channel his inner Kanye and start sampling, rapping and wearing lots of iced-out jewelry……….

- World, Tunisia needs your help. You might not know where Tunisia is (northern Africa) and you might not know what its chief natural resource is (sand), but that should not stop you from lending a hand to a nation in need. Open your heart, channel your inner compassionate soul and listen to Tunisia's prime minister as he calls for greater foreign investment to help support the country's ailing economy and its transition to democracy. This foolproof strategy made its world premiere at a conference entitled "Investment in Tunisia: Startup Democracy” and it was there that Prime Minister Mehdi Jomaa coined the idea that "investing in Tunisia is an investment in democracy." One might recall that Tunisians overthrew their dictator in 2011 and are set to complete the democratic transition with autumn elections, so this is a great chance to get in on the ground floor of the world’s newest democracy. Opportunities abound and while newly minted democracies such as Iraq have struggled and devolved into a morass of militant aggression, murder and genocide in recent months, that in no way means the same thing is going to happen in an impoverished nation with a faltering economy boasting a 15.7 percent unemployment rate and more than 15 percent of the population living under the poverty line, up from 10 percent in 2010. Look not at the fact than government banking official Chadli Ayari said growth for 2014 is predicted to only be 2.8 percent, while inflation is at 7 percent, but look rather at the 30 countries that attended the conference and ask yourself, “Do I really want to pass up on such a great opportunity to spend money I’ll never get back?” Ponder and then pull out that wallet………