Sunday, May 15, 2011

Movie news, downsizing dogs in China and more Dubai excess

- The one-child-per-family rule has gone so well for China, its largest city is taking the idea a step further by enacting a limit of one dog per family in an effort to gain control over its soaring pet population and curb rabies. Shanghai’s new ordinance has led pet owners with multiple dogs to find ways to conceal their plethora of pooches, be it walking them at night or leaving one with family members. The rule officially goes into effect Monday and would necessitate selling or giving away extra dogs if a person has more than one. Shanghai's new pet ownership rules aren’t all anti-dog; part of the law reduces fees for dog registration in hopes of bringing more undocumented dogs onto the books. However, Shanghai dog owners will now be subjected to leash laws just like residents of hundreds of other cities around the world, which is the one part of the law no one should have an issue with - at least no one who walks on two feet instead of four paws. The need for tougher dog laws is obvious, as only about 140,000 of Shanghai's estimated 800,000 dogs have been registered under current rules. Those rules are extremely tough on owners, demanding a $300 annual fee for those living downtown and half that for those in the suburbs. Under the new measures, the fees will drop to $75 for downtown residents, $45 for those in suburbs and $14 for rural residents. On top of those costs, dog owners will also have to pay $6 for rabies shots. Beijing and Guangzhou have implemented similar policies for pooches, but the response has not been overly favorable in any one location. To many Chinese, the laws represent a repressive regime intruding further into their lives and reaching back to a bygone era of decades past in which pet keeping was deemed an anti-communist, bourgeoisie luxury. Shanghai does conduct occasional sweeps for unlicensed dogs, but officials clearly hope those efforts will be less necessary under the new law. Then again, many dog owners will probably send their extra canines to live with friends or family in the country until the heat dies down and then go right back to violating the law just as they always have……………


-Dubai is a place known for its wretched excess, to the point one Dubai mall eatery wasted tens of thousands of dollars on a life-sized, decorative Michael Jordan statue but didn’t bother to make sure the statue was accurate in that it featured Jordan with a No. 32 jersey instead of the number he made famous with the Chicago Bulls, 23. A place with that sort of mentality is the perfect place for someone like Argentinean soccer legend Diego Maradona, who is such a fan of wretched excess that he was once hospitalized after going on a food bender. His flair for expensive fashion, beautiful women and fast cars makes him perfect for Dubai and so it’s fitting that Dubai's Al Wasl soccer club has made Maradona an offer to be its next coach and talks are ongoing. The club confirmed its interest in the Argentine great, who has been out of coaching since he led Argentina to the 2010 World Cup quarterfinals but was not retained as coach for reasons that were never fully explained. Maradona is in Dubai and was spotted at Al Wasl headquarters and out shopping at the Dubai Mall. Ashraf Ahmad Mohammad, the club's chief executive officer, characterized his feelings as s "happy" with the negotiations thus far while cautioning that it would take several more days for an agreement. The club had hinted at a possible announcement Sunday, but that never materialized. It has been stuck in a holding pattern since firing Sergio Farias in March and currently ranks fourth in the domestic league. Signing the 1986 World Cup winner would generate headlines, but Maradona does not have a wealth of managerial experience. Prior to coaching Argentina from 2008-10, he had only coached Deportivo Mandiyu in 1994 and Racing Club in 1995. Both times, he stepped down before his contract was up. In other words, he’s not a “see things through” type of guy when it comes to leading a team. His results were varied as Argentina’s national coach, with some small victories but also two of the team’s worst losses ever -- a 6-1 hammering by Bolivia in 2010 World Cup qualifying and a 4-0 quarterfinal defeat to Germany at the tournament. Maradona’s name has been linked to an eclectic mix of jobs since losing the Argentina job last year, including Iran's national team and several English clubs including Blackburn and Fulham. Now, he may have found a place that suits him perfectly……………


- What is wrong with the authorities in Fall River and New Bedford, Mass. and how can it be fixed? These fools are openly seeking to deprive their constituents of one of the best stoner-ific food treats around by ripping Lazy Cakes from store shelves. What are Lazy Cakes? On the Lazy Cakes Facebook page, the manufacturer calls the product, “A tasty chocolate treat that brings on the ultimate state of relaxation.” Sounds suspicious like a pot brownie that the resident stoner in your office makes and leaves in the conference room just to jerk with everyone, but tell me more. “The magic of Lazy Cakes, the original relaxation brownie, is in its proprietary blend that includes herbal relaxation aids melatonin, Valerian Root Extract, Rose Hips Extract, and Passion Flower,” the company explained. So technically the treats aren’t laced with the one ingredient that would truly make them Lazy Cakes, but melatonin is close enough and if you asked leaders like Fall River Mayor William Flanagan, too close. “These brownies are laced with melatonin,” he said at a news conference Thursday. “Melatonin is a sleep aid. If someone wants to buy melatonin, that’s fine, but it shouldn’t be in a brownie that’s packaged to attract kids.” Hang on there, Mayor McBuzzkill. Are Lazy Cakes really a danger to kids? Just because they contain eight milligrams of melatonin in each of the brownies in a package doesn’t mean kids are going to chow down on them. Besides, we need to hear the other side of the issue before making any final decisions, so let’s hear from Terry Harris, CEO of HBB, LLC, makers of Lazy Cakes. Harris issued the following statement: “We have not been contacted by the Mayor’s office in regard to their specific questions about our product but we welcome a conversation with Mr. Flanagan. We created Lazy Cakes to provide adults with a great-tasting way to combat the stress associated with our fast-paced lives. Ingredients include items that anyone can purchase at any health food or vitamin store, such as melatonin, Valerian Root Extract, Rose Hips Extract, and Passion Flower. Each Brownie is clearly labeled to indicate that we recommend that Lazy Cakes be enjoyed by adults only. We encourage parents to check the label before providing this or any product to their children.” The statement did not sway Wet Blanket Flanagan, who insists Lazy Cakes should be banned from store shelves in his town and has asked the city council to pass an ordinance to make it happen. He has company in the pursuit from New Bedford City Councilor Bruce Duarte, Jr., who has filed a motion to set an ordinance in his city to ban or regulate the sale of Lazy Cakes. Thanks for ruining everyone else’s fun, you tools………….


- Quests for world domination often involve making difficult choices: Do I invade an unsuspecting country with an overwhelming show of force or just nuke them off the map, should I have a peanut butter sandwich or filet mignon before announcing that I’m now dictator for life, things along those lines. Oh, and do we launch a line of über-cheap notebook computers that eschew the traditional, localized platform and long-running BIOS start-up process of Microsoft Windows laptops for Web applications and machines with minimal Flash storage that load within 8 seconds. That’s the question Google has asked itself and answered by creating new notebooks from Samsung and Acer and unveiling them at the Google I/O developer conference May 11. Chrome OS is the search engine's Web-based platform for computers and it is a marked departure from the computing norm. Taking its biggest gamble on its cloud computing reputation is a risky play for Google, but the company hopes the Samsung Series 5 Chromebook and Acer's 11.6-inch model Chromebook will be a huge hit. Samsung’s version will sport a 12.1-inch screen and will cost $429 for WiFi-only, while the WiFi+3G model will run $499. Acer, known for crappy, low-end computers, will feature fewer bells and whistles on its model, which will cost $349. Both Chromebook models will be available online June 15 at Amazon and Best Buy in the U.S., as well as in the UK, France, Germany, Netherlands, Italy and Spain. Another interesting feature of the Chromebook is Google’s plan to use it as a subscription service. Businesses can purchase the chintzy computers in bulk for $28 per user, per month and schools may do the same for $20 per user, per month. However, both plans require a three-year service agreement that includes a warranty, support, service, and hardware replacements when necessary. The big question is how quickly and fully users will embrace the idea of being completely dependent on the cloud computing approach. Even a lightweight machine weighing in at 3.3 pounds and booting up within 8 seconds is only a positive if the cloud computing system is fully reliable…………


- Thor kept the hammer in its hand for the second straight weekend and crushed the competition at the box office, winning the earnings race with $34.5 million. Although the film remains short of the break-even point (having made $119.2 million of its $150 million budget back), it’s two-week total is as successful a start as Paramount could have hoped for. Second place went to a movie unapologetically positioning itself as the female doppelganger of The Hangover, the chick flick known as Bridesmaids. In its debut weekend, the Kristen Wiig-written film made $24.4 million and did better than expected overall. Fast Five continued its own über-strong start with $19.6 million for third place and a whopping cumulative total of $168.8 million after three weeks of work. Demonic “thriller” Priest finally debuted and predictably failed to match the hype by finishing fourth and making a so-so $14.5 million despite opening wide in 2,864 theaters. The last among the top five was Rio, still hanging near the top five weeks after debuting by adding $8 million to its coffers to elevate its five-week total to $125 million. The remainder of the top 10 consisted of: Jumping the Broom (a truly terrible movie that came in at No. 6 with $7.3 million and had made just $25.9 million for two weeks), Something Borrowed (No. 7 overall but a distant third among wedding-related comedies for the weekend with $7 million), Water for Elephants (No. 8 thanks to a $4.1 million effort and with $48.5 million through four weeks), the apocalyptically awful Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Big Happy Family (No. 9 with a whopping $2.2 million for a four-week total of $50.2 million) and Soul Surfer (No. 10 with $1,800,000 and $39,200,000 overall). Dropping out of the top 10 from last weekend were Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil (No. 11) and Prom (No. 14 and fading fast after just three weeks of release. One other noteworthy debut was Everything Must Go, the indie dramedy starring Will Ferrell in an unusually serious role for him. Everything opened in a mere 218 theaters, yet boasted a solid $3,784 per-theater average………….

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