- There is a very foolish person living somewhere in the great Cincinnati area and it would be a mistake not to offer some advice to this misguided soul. On Sunday night, this person was driving around downtown Cincinnati and spotted a parked police cruiser. For nearly every motorist, this sight is a warning to slam on the brakes and begin following the rules of the road. But in this case, the anonymous driver reached for his or her smartphone and used it to record footage of the officer behind the wheel of that cruiser, fast asleep. The officer was parked on Marshall Avenue, just off McMicken Avenue, and was supposed to be securing the area surrounding a downed tree. The driver claimed to have been driving slowly to avoid the tree and fallen limbs and thus providing a perfect chance to capture the napping officer on camera. From there, the driver faced a tough question: What do you do with footage of a police officer sleeping on the job? If you show up at the police department and hand over the footage, your identity would be revealed and that could lead to retribution from other officers none too happy with you exposing one of their own. A bolder soul might hang onto the footage, get in touch with the officer and suggest that you can keep what you filmed quiet as long as they are willing to make any future parking or traffic citations against you go away. That would be the savviest option, but instead of choosing it, this fool took the video to a local television station’s investigative unit. The station then showed the footage to Cincinnati Police Chief James Craig in the sort of scene local news shows love because they can air footage of an incensed public official reacting to some controversial footage. Craig ordered an investigation of the incident and cited concerns about officer safety. "If there was someone that was crazy enough to attempt to hurt a police officer, that would be the perfect opportunity, and they could have gotten away with, 'There was no one out but me and the officer,'” Craig said. A fair point, but what if the officer was on break? Umm, that excuse won't fly because Cincinnati police officers don't have a fixed policy that allows for any sort of lunch or dinner break. Uh-oh…………….
- Nice try, America. You thought you could get your flabby butt into shape by simply dropping into a pair of Shape-ups, EasyTone or TrueBalance shoes and going about your normal daily activities. Instead of exercising to tighten your buns, thighs and abs, you could instead use shoes with uneven soles designed to put muscles into overdrive and get that model’s physique sans actual effort. Unfortunately, the American Council on Exercise has burst that bubble with a study that found Skechers Shape-ups, Reebok EasyTone and Masai Barefoot Technology toned one's muscles no more than normal running shoes. Paying extra for “toning” shoes is, in other words, a waste of money just like any miracle diet, wonder-working exercise gizmo or DVD workout series. Maybe that reality has already begun to dawn upon most Americans because the same toning shoes that were once fetching $100 or more are now cheaper thanks to a flood of them on the market and declining interest from consumers. Skechers, which obviously banked heavily on its Shape-ups line, recently said it lost $29.9 million in the second quarter, compared with a profit of $40.2 million during the same period last year. The Manhattan Beach, Calif., shoe maker’s sales fell 14 percent to $434.4 million and stock shares have plunged 28 percent year to date. Rather than attempt to deny the obvious, company officials have blamed the loss mostly on a tough market for toning shoes. "We aggressively reduced our excess toning inventory during the second quarter by selling 2 million pairs of our original Shape-ups for a loss of $21 million," Chief Operating Officer David Weinberg said. Declining sales are one problem, but several lawsuits have also been filed against Skechers, Reebok and New Balance alleging deceptive marketing. Some consumer activist groups have gone so far as to call the shoes unstable and claim they could lead to injuries. Skechers has vociferously disputed those claims and pointed to thousands of unsolicited letters supposedly from satisfied customers and to company sponsored studies saying their shoes tone the body, relieve back stress and improve posture. If that were truly the case, though, it seems unlikely that sales of toning shoes would be down 55 percent from last year and companies such as Reebok would not be adopting new marketing approaches centered on promoting a positive self-image for customers without improving their overall fitness level. You’ve used up your 15 minutes, toning shoes, now move off to the side along with Milli Vanilli, Clear Pepsi and fanny packs…………
- From one struggling, aging athlete to another, the sympathy is flowing. Tennis champion Roger Federer, whose own play has fallen off substantially in recent years as younger rivals have blown right by him, feels for his pal Tiger Woods in light of his own fall from grace. Granted, Woods’ demise has been largely predicated on his scandal-ridden personal life and multiple knee surgeries, but that doesn’t mean Federer doesn’t feel badly about it. Federer admitted "it's been hard to watch" Woods struggle lately. "It's hard to follow, because you know what an athlete wants to do. He wants to be out there and compete and that's what he's not able to do with his injuries right now," Federer said Saturday after a third-round win at the U.S. Open. He also said he and Woods chatted briefly on the phone earlier this week, although the topic of conversation probably was not the friendly competition the two once had over who would reach the Grand Slam record in their sport first. Federer won that battle by tying Pete Sampras' mark of 14 at the French Open in 2009 and breaking it two months later at Wimbledon. He has won two majors since, whereas Woods hasn’t won a major since the 2008 U.S. Open at Torrey Pines. Heck, Woods hasn’t won a tournament at all since crashing his SUV into a fire hydrant and tree while fleeing his home to avoid his 9-iron-wielding wife Elin on Thanksgiving night in 2009. Still, Federer dutifully played the part of the faithful friend and tried to find something positive to say about his fellow declining legend. "He's done so much in such a short period of time and for such a long time, actually, which is where I also draw the inspiration from," Federer said. "To see those great athletes do it for a very long time, I've been able to do something similar in that regard." Yes, but the days of the two of them pitching Gillette razors together and winning majors are still long gone and they aren’t coming back…………
- If only Steve Erwin were still walking this planet, he would be geeked out of his mind right now. He would also probably be on the next flight to the Philippines, looking to join in on the hunt for the supposed largest crocodile in the world. That massive croc may or may not exist, but the hunters who captured a giant croc measuring a massive 21 feet and weighing a whopping 2,370 pounds over the weekend in the Philippines seems confident that an even larger beast exist. The 21-footer, which could be the largest of its kind captured alive, was so massive that it took 100 people to drag the reptile from the Agusan del Sur marsh, on the southern island of Mindinao, on Sept. 4 after a team of about 30 men tracked the saltwater crocodile for three weeks. The takedown came from the execution of a plan involving meat bait and a metal cable, along with 30 men insane beyond all description. They were, after all, looking for a crocodile suspected of eating a farmer, taking down an adult water buffalo and possibly decapitating a 12-year-old girl. The farmer went missing in July from the town of Bunawan, about 515 miles southeast of the capital Manila, followed by an eyewitness account of a huge croc killing and consuming a water buffalo last month. Unfortunately, this crocodile was not the culprit in any of those incidents. After its capture, wildlife officials forced the creature to vomit and found no trace of human remains or water buffaloes in its stomach contents. Thus, the theory that an even larger, more dangerous crocodile exists has some credence. "There is a bigger one, and it could be the one creating problems," said wildlife official Ronnie Sumiller. "The villagers were saying 10 percent of their fear was gone because of the first capture. But there is still the other 90 percent to take care of." Ninety percent or not, the locals still threw a party to celebrate the capture of the first crocodile and named it Lolong, after local hunter Ernesto “Lolong” Conate, who died of a stroke while helping in the hunt. Realizing Lolong’s marketing potential, potential Edwin Cox Elorde, Mayor of Bunawan, said Lolong will become the star attraction of a new eco-tourism park to be built in the area. Once the animal is certified and weighed, it will also enter the idiot-inspiring Guinness World Records as the largest saltwater crocodile currently in captivity…………
- Being a major recording artist can definitely instill a sense of entitlement in a person. Often, that sense of entitlement extends to a star’s friends and family members even though they have done nothing to deserve it. Being related to pop diva Beyonce Knowles (sorry Beyonce, but you’re not great enough to justify being called by one name) appears to have done just that for little sister Solange Knowles, who seems to believe that being the sister of a star entitles her to act like a diva herself. Solange Knowles apparently showed up at the Cameo Nightclub on Washington Avenue in Miami Beach Saturday night and was denied access because she was carrying a ginormous piece of inflatable fruit. More specifically, she was toting a 5-foot-long inflatable banana and when the bouncer would not allow her inside with the oversized, fake fruit, she went ballistic. When she pressed the issue, off-duty officers working at the club escorted her across the street to continue the discussion. What happened from there is open for debate because police insist they followed the law and dealt with the situation properly, but Knowles has since filed an informal complaint with Miami Beach police claiming that the reasons for not being allowed access into the club were racially motivated. She has accused off-duty Miami Beach police officers of discrimination and pulling a weapon on her during the confrontation and took her argument to Twitter on Sunday. "A police officer just pulled a weapon on me," she wrote as part of a nine-tweet rant. "I have done NOTHING illegal, against the law, or anything of the sort. I have literally had my last leg with discriminating police! Miami police department will be notified ... I am simply tired of police using arrogance, ego and authority as an offense." The final straw appears to have been one of the off-duty officers pulling a weapon and threatening to deflate the banana. “Ma’am, you either leave right now or I am going to take out my gun and put a hole in that giant banana for you! Do you understand me?” What a priceless exchange that must have been…….but alas, no video of the incident has surfaced. A Miami Beach police spokesman confirmed Monday that Knowles would be contacted by internal affairs investigators, and as such the department would have no further comment. As for Knowles, she claimed on Twitter that she was publicizing the incident to "raise awareness" of some great injustice……I think. "I could have left quietly, but I am sick and tired of this scenario being played over and over again," she wrote. "It is time to do something about it. I am a mother raising a young black child in America. I'm going to die trying!" Great, but what does you attempting to haul an inflatable piece of fruit into some trendy South Beach club have to do with raising a black child in America………….
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