- Memo to military and government officials in Kosovo: Next time, either use fireproof materials or simply stop provoking your region’s ethnic Serbs. For the second time in three years, those ethnic Serbs have set fire to a border crossing post in northern Kosovo. The second incident took place Wednesday, more than three year after the same border post was burned down in 2008 by local Serbs after Kosovo declared independence. Wednesday’s uprising came after Kosovo's government said it had regained control of that station and one other, which probably was not a wise move - at least not without drastically upping security at the post and preparing for the inevitable attempt to burn it to the ground. Oliver Ivanovic, Serbia's state secretary for Kosovo, said no one was hurt in the incident but worried that the arson would spark other like-minded acts against government and military properties. "One act of violence produces more violence. I am afraid we are entering a spiral of violence," he fretted. That sentiment would seem to have some merit as Wednesday’s violence came just one day after a Kosovo police officer was shot in the head and died on Tuesday in clashes between the police and local Serbs opposing Kosovo's efforts to take control of its border posts. Now, to the cynic it would seem that Serbs in the area are extremely angry and territorial and have no intention of allowing the government or anyone to take control of anything they believe to be theirs, but a more resonant message underlies Wednesday’s violence if one listens closely enough. “Oh, so you think you now control this border post? We’ll show you that you control nothing more than a smoldering heap of ashes, you insolent a**holes………….
- This explains so very much. South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia has been suspended an astonishing six times by coach Steve Spurrier for various off-field indiscretions, including showing up drunk to an athletic department function and being kicked out for acting like…..well, a drunken idiot. He returned to working out with the team in June and during SEC media days last week, Spurrier said he expects Garcia to return to the team full-time for the start of preseason practice. "Stephen has done well," Spurrier said. "He has some guidelines he must follow to be reinstated in August. He's done everything we've asked. He's certainly behaved very well, gone to all the workouts from what I understand. I guess we don't want to kick him out for stupidity.” Explaining how Garcia has been given so many second chances and managed to f*ck them all up became much easier after South Carolina quarterbacks coach G.A. Mangus was arrested early Tuesday morning and charged with nuisance conduct for allegedly "facing Main St. urinating on the street curb and roadway," at 1:31 a.m. ET Tuesday in Greenville as two police officers looked on. According to the report, another officer was called to the scene and approached Mangus, who was "unsteady on his feet and he had a strong odor of alcoholic beverage coming from his person." Wait, a guy taking a leak on a public street at 1:31 a.m. was drunk? Wow. If there was any doubt of his inebriated state at that point, it was erased when the officer began questioning him and Mangus' speech was slurred and he failed to provide the officer with "straight answers." He was hit with a ticket for $470, handcuffed and taken to the Greenville County Detention Center. That led to the requisite apology via written statement in which Mangus said, "Last night I acted irresponsibly and I deeply regret my actions. I take full responsibility. I would like to publicly apologize to Coach Spurrier, (athletic director) Eric Hyman, the entire team and everyone associated with the University of South Carolina." Hmm, so a drunk and disorderly coach who works directly with quarterbacks and his No. 1 player at the position was just suspended for drunk and idiotic conduct……I sense a connection. Maybe Mangus and Garcia can commiserate over their woes during Mangus’ sudden wealth of free time, as he has been suspended indefinitely. One lingering question from the arrest is what Mangus, a 42-year-old dude, was doing out well past midnight, drunk and stumbling from a bar. As it turns out, he was doing what all convention goers do when they get out of boring meetings and brainstorming sessions. See, he was in Greenville for the annual South Carolina Athletic Coaches Association convention and decided to go out and blow off some steam at the end of the day. Oh, and also setting a solid example for his players to follow…………
- Science has done it again. Stunning the world is part of what the scientific community does and unearthing nuggets of wisdom that no one with an IQ south of 22 could have surmised in their lifetime comes easily to those in lab coats and goggles, toting clipboards and burning through research dollars. This new discovery is as earth-shattering as ever because no one ever could have imagined that individuals who dislike the size of their nose and seek plastic surgery to rectify the problem might be more likely to show signs of mental illness. This über-revealing study found that approximately one in three people seeking rhinoplasty — commonly called a nose job — have signs of body dysmorphic disorder, a mental health condition in which a person has an unnatural preoccupation with slight or imagined defects in appearance. Its scope is limited because its findings are based on a study of 266 patients evaluated by plastic surgeons in Belgium over a 16-month period, but making broad generalizations about a much larger group of people based on the actions and characteristics of a much smaller group is what science is all about. Study participants all made appointments to discuss a rhinoplasty procedure and were asked to complete a questionnaire to assess their symptoms of body dysmorphic disorder. What researchers found was that among patients seeking the procedure specifically for medical reasons, just two percent exhibited symptoms of the disorder. The rate was exponentially higher - 43 percent - for those having surgery purely for cosmetic reasons, 43 percent showed signs of the disorder. Yes, people with an unreasonable preoccupation and distress about their bodies also were more likely to have negative feelings about noses that were relatively normal. Reading more about this exhilarating research won't be difficult, as you will only need to consult the August issue of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery that has undoubtedly already landed in your mailbox. As is to be expected, the scientific community’s response to the study has been to suggest follow-up research to examine the link between BDD and plastic surgery. Previous studies have shown the figure to be close to 10 percent, meaning this new research falls well outside the norm. Oh, and it also provides another built-in excuse for any narcissistic, superficial jackass who insists on carving up their body with dozens of plastic surgery procedures on their way to looking like a human Barbie doll……….
- The dream has long lived in the hearts and minds of Americans from coast to coast and citizens of every nation on God’s great Earth and now, that dream can be realized. An entire town in South Dakota is for sale and you can score the entire operation for less than most NFL veterans make in a season. For a mere $799,000 (less if your haggling skills are good), you can purchase Scenic, South Dakota - the whole, unpopulated town. Sure, Scenic may not offer much - a dance hall, a jail and a handful of out-buildings - but imagine the cachet of being able to say you own your own town. Donald Trump may own a lot of things, but even he can't say he owns an entire town. Enough land and golf course property to form several towns, yes, but an actual town, no. What’s the story behind Scenic being for sale? "They've decided to sell and move on," said Dave Olsen, a realtor with Coldwell Banker, who is hoping to sell the property. The sale includes the "kit and kaboodle," said Olsen. The means a total of 46 acres - 12 composing “downtown” Scenic and 34 surrounding the center of this thriving metropolis - located about 50 miles east of Rapid City, South Dakota. Anyone considering such a purchase has to be asking a few important questions and the answer to the most important questions is a resounding “yes.” As in yes, Scenic does have its own saloon where you and your friends can re-enact scenes from classic spaghetti westerns. It also has a dance hall, museum, bunkhouse, two stores, a train depot, jails (one abandoned) and a handful of out-buildings. Not only can you re-enact scenes from old westerns, but you can imprison your friends afterward and it may even be quasi-legal (probably not). Acting quickly on this rare offer is essential because it is currently posted on buyscenicsd.com, which offers video tours of various locations. The entire world can get in on this sale and that means Scenic likely won't last long on the open market, not after would-be buyers see the cow skulls adorning the sign for the Longhorn Saloon, which advertises tobacco, lunch and dancing -- in that order. Clearing out of town won't take long for the current residents, as the population has slowly dwindled to less than 10 people. All of them are related to Twila Merril, who was recently diagnosed with cancer. Running the town has become too much for the family, Olsen explained. "It's really an interesting place and there's so much history," he said of the town. "All it needs is a little population -- and ingenuity." Sounds like a typical desperate realtor with big deal locked in his crosshairs………….
- Oh, Parents Television Council, how you slay us with your easily mockable ridiculousness. If you’re not bombarding World Wrestling Entertainment and its sponsors with square-tastic complaints about how violent WWE action is and how inappropriate it is for children, you’re launching crusades against some other entity or show responsible for bringing un-wholesome, non-Bible thumper material to the small screen. The latest of those crusades is what brings the PTC to the world’s attention at the moment. Depending on how closely you follow ratings-challenged television networks with one or two good shows on their entire programming schedule, you may or may not known that NBC is readying a new drama called “The Playboy Club” for launch this fall. The program has already created waves in über-conservative and caffeine-hating Salt Lake City, Utah, where the local NBC affiliate steadfastly refuses to carry the show because it does not fit with the station’s core values. Alternative plans have been created to rectify that situation, but the PTC still has its tighty-whities in a bunch over the show and is lambasting the Peacock for putting “Playboy Club,” starring Eddie Cibrian as a candidate for district attorney who frequents the titular establishment and soon finds his life entangled with that of a Playboy bunny, on local stations across the country. Predictably, this is a twofold effort in which the organization is also leaning on local stations to not air the show. At the core of this push are supposedly alarming statistics provided by the PTC claiming that 200,000 Americans are “porn addicts,” and 56 percent of divorce cases can be blamed not on lack of love but on “one person” having "obsessive interest" in pornography. In PTC leaders’ minds, airing this show makes NBC and its affiliates avid supporters of the demise of the American family. Never mind that viewers won't see anything 1/100th as offensive or revealing as the porn they can access any time they want on their smartphones, tablets, laptops or desktop computers, dammit, the Parents Television Council will not be denied. According to the PTC, NBC affiliates have responded with “canned responses” to previous pleas. Anyone wanting to play an active role in taking a blowtorch to the existence and survival of the American family as we know it can tune in to the debut of “The Playboy Club” on Monday, Sept. 19 at 10 p.m., assuming your local affiliate does not cave under the immense influence of the mighty Parents Television Council…………
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