- Is that gosh-durned, newfangled food pyramid thingy just too confusing for you, America? Based on your ever-expanding waistline, let’s just assume the answer is yes. In that case, if the triangle of food groups informing you how to structure your diet so as to achieve maximum health benefits is too far over your head, then this is your week. The Obama administration is killing off the food pyramid -- that symbol of healthy eating -- and as of Thursday, it will be replaced by a new graphic to tell American consumers what quantities of grains, fruits and vegetables, protein and dairy they should eat to maintain a healthy diet. In its place will be a sparkly new plate, with four different- colored sections indicating how much of each food group the United States Department of Agriculture recommends. The multi-colored plate is a "crucial element of the administration’s crusade against obesity" led by first lady Michelle Obama, according to the administration itself. Half of the space on the plate will be reserved for fruits and vegetables, while smaller circle beside it will indicate a day's dairy allowance. You’re probably asking yourself, “I wonder how much this dose of dietary wisdom cost to create. Maybe $10,000?” Oh, how wrong you would be. This baby cost a cool $2 million to develop and promote, but can anyone truly put a price on properly educating Americans about new federal dietary guidelines released in January? Besides, nutritionists and public health officials never fully embraced the food pyramid, which was introduced in 1992. The original concept was good - having food groups that one eats larger portions of (fruits, vegetables, grains) at the wider base and placing dairy and protein towards the pointy top of the pyramid. Predictably, the whiners in the dairy and meat industries objected, complaining that their products were being "stigmatized." That led to a revised pyramid, MyPyramid, being released in 2005, in such a way that whatever nutritional information it was to communicate was rendered almost useless. Its confusing, vertical brightly colored strips represented the different food groups and it also showed a stick figure running up the side to emphasize the need for exercise. The plate concept actually does make more sense, but don’t be stunned if the dairy industry objects to being relegated to the second circle off to the side and claiming the government is discriminating against it once again…………
- The NFL lockout has been positive for at least one player: Washington Redskins defensive lineman Albert Haynesworth. Haynesworth, who suffered through a troubled and erratic season in which he spent more time failing conditioning tests and pouting like a 350-pound baby than actually contributing to his team’s occasional success, used some of the hefty $21 million roster bonus (as part of his $100 million contract) to pay off the man he (allegedly) assaulted several months ago during a road-rage incident in northern Virginia. A judge has dismissed a road-rage assault charge after Haynesworth reached an agreement with the alleged victim. It may seem like buying justice and in truth, it is. Virginia law allows a judge to dismiss misdemeanor assaults under a provision called "accord and satisfaction," in which a victim says he has been made whole, usually by a financial payment. The provision is perfectly suited for the rich to use their immense wealth to purchase justice and stay out of jail, although it is extremely unlikely Haynesworth ever would have served any significant jail time for the incident. The alleged victim, Arthur J. Velasquez, had his nose bloodied in the incident and claimed Haynesworth punched him after both of them stopped following a vehicular altercation in Reston. Velasquez told police he made a gesture at Haynesworth for tailgating him and claimed that after they both stopped their vehicles, Haynesworth allegedly got out of his pickup truck and punched him. The details of the settlement have not been made public and both Haynesworth and his alleged victim declined to comment. However, Haynesworth's attorney, Steven Merril tried to put a happy face on this pile of judicial and societal crap by saying of his client, "He's sorry about the whole incident. Haynesworth's mistake was getting out of the car. Most judges don't like that, and find the person who gets out of the car bears more responsibility. From that point on, the stories diverge." So getting out of his vehicle was a bigger mistake than punching a man he weighed twice as much as in the head? Okey doke, counselor…………
- The “dumb Pollock” jokes may have long ago become too politically incorrect for anyone over the age of 10 to use, but if Polish prime minister Donald Tuck keeps opening his mouth wide and inserting his foot directly into it, the world will have a whole new reason to crack on his country. Perhaps this remark can be attributed to sweltering temperatures getting the best of Tuck and causing him to suffer from the seldom-seen phenomenon of temporary, heat-induced stupidity. Tuck had better hope so because during a press conference Tuesday in Warsaw to address Poland taking over the rotating European Union presidency next month, he was asked if everything was organizationally “buttoned up” for the EU presidency, starting July 1. The question came from a rather attractive female Polish radio reporter who was dressed in some tight-fitting attire. “I’m looking at the lady’s dress and buttoning up is not what comes to mind,” Tusk replied. “I like… summer.” Wow……that was, um, creepy, predatory and more than a little disturbing. Nothing like eyeing an attractive female media member, ogling her in a public setting and making a sexist remark like, “I like summer,” a remark clearly about women wearing less clothing as temperatures rise. In the social media-heavy world we all live in, Tusk’s words were quickly picked up by the 24/7 news cycle and rebroadcast, re-tweeted and replayed over and over again and were quickly tagged with comparisons to another famously lecherous, womanizing political leader - former President of the United States Bill Clinton. No offense to Tusk, but one off-color press conference remark doesn’t put him anywhere near Slick Willie Clinton’s area code when it comes to pervy behavior. Check back when Tusk is having interns do seedy and sexually stimulating favors for him in his plush office…………
- America, this is a please surprise. Are you becoming more sophisticated and high-class in choosing your entertainment options? Clearly so if a new report from the Broadway League is to be believed. The report lays out surprising claims that the 2010-11 Broadway season in New York saw a jump in both attendance and box-office dollars over the previous season. The report, released Tuesday, claims that attendance rose 5.4 percent from the 2009–10 season and grosses jumped 5.9 percent over the same period. The numbers themselves are truly staggering, as Broadway shows brought in a total of $1,080,562,880 and attendance of 12,534,595 for the 2010-11 season (and yes, Broadway does have a season just like television and professional sports). In fact, the 2010-11 season began May 24, 2010 and ended May 29, 2011. That have the just-concluded season a slight advantage, as it comprised 53 weeks, whereas the previous season had 52 weeks. Still, the report showed that attendance through week 52 was up 3.1 percent over last year's 52-week season. Revenues pushing past the $1 billion mark can be attributed in large part to the exorbitant average price of seeing a show - $86.21 during the just-wrapped season according to the Broadway League. The season’s biggest hits included "The Book of Mormon" -- which has played to full houses since opening in March -- along with "War Horse" and the revival of "Anything Goes." Long-running shows like "Wicked" and "The Lion King" continued to do strong business and of course, the season totals also include box-office statistics for "Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark," even though the show failed to open in the 2010-11 period. Production delays, on-set dangers, safety issues and other calamities have pushed the much-anticipated production back several times even though it began previews in late November. It finally reopened for previews this month, with a new opening date set for June 14. All told, 42 shows opened on Broadway in the most recent season, including 14 musicals, 25 plays and 3 special events. Together, they turned in what can only be characterized as a successful effort…………
- To quote legendary Seinfeld loafer George Costanza after being found to have had sex with the office cleaning lady on his desk, “Was that wrong?” That question pertains to New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie's trip on a state police helicopter to watch his son's high school baseball game, which has drawn heated criticism from Democratic state lawmakers who quickly called for the first-term Republican to repay the cost of the excursion. Christie’s use of a government helicopter for a personal trip seems especially galling for a man who has asked workers to give up benefits as part of "shared sacrifice" in cutting the cost of government. But hey, when a governor needs to travel to Montvale to watch his son play catcher for Delbarton School and time is of the essence, he hops that bird first and asks questions later. Besides, the helicopter is "occasionally used as the schedule demands", Michael Drewniak, a spokesman for Christie, said in an e-mail. State Democratic Party Chairman John Wisniewski seemed especially angry over the incident, terming Christie's ride on the $12.5 million aircraft "hypocrisy" because of the governor’s criticisms of state spending and targeting of public officials who abuse government perks. "It's an outrage, quite frankly," Wisniewski, an assemblyman from Sayreville, said. "This is a governor who made a career out of criticizing other people for breaking the rules and here he is, breaking the same rules in a cavalier fashion." Other state lawmakers noted Christie’s cuts for property-tax rebates and funding for women's health care and called on the governor to reimburse the taxpayers for all costs associated with personal and political trips. A bill is currently winding its way through the state legislature that would prohibit any member of the governor's office or state employee from taxpayer-funded travel or staying overnight unless the trip is deemed to be essential, a bill that would seem to apply perfectly to this very situation. So what were the logistics that forced their aerial adventure for the governor? Well, he had a meeting earlier in the day at Drumthwacket, the governor's mansion in Princeton, about 67 miles by car from Saint Joseph High School in Montvale. He met with a group of donors and political operatives from Iowa, said Rick Gorka, a spokesman for the New Jersey Republican State Committee. His visitors apparently offered support and attempted to lure him into a presidential run in 2012, Gorka said. By the time the meeting was over, Christie had no way to make it to the game on time and decided that missing the contest and not wasting thousands of taxpayer dollars in the process wasn’t an option. He arrived in time to see a 4-2 victory for his son’s team. The helicopter used for this über-important trip was a new Agusta which is supposed to be used for transporting emergency patients, law enforcement officers and executives. Does this sound like an emergency to anyone? Didn’t think so…………
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