More recycled entertainment, feeding wild opossums and LeBron should stop talking for a while

- Score another one for unimaginative, recycled entertainment content. Hollywood is remaking every move made over the past half-century and now television is following suit. “Hawaii Five-O” has already hit the air and had a lackluster first season for CBS, ABC is planning a “new” take on “Charlie’s Angels” for the fall and now “The Flintstones" are heading back to television, by way of "Family Guy" creator Seth MacFarlane. Fox announced the new show Monday, claiming MacFarlane will give a 21st century spin to the classic 1960s animated comedy series about the lives of Fred Flintstone, his wife Wilma, and their neighbors Barney and Betty Rubble. "The very first cartoon character I drew at age two was Fred Flintstone," MacFarlane said in a statement. "So it's appropriate that events have come full circle, allowing me to produce the newest incarnation of this great franchise. Plus, I think America is finally ready for an animated sitcom about a fat, stupid guy with a wife who's too good for him." Hey-oh, Seth, good one. Jokes aside, this is another shining example of the “Why bother to come up with new, original ideas if we can pull some old show, recycle and modernize it and pass it off as new” philosophy. How the series is going to be a modern-day take on the lives of the Flintstones and the Rubbles and do anything other than keep a gimmick going is unfathomable. The story of two hard-working middle-class families living with contemporary conveniences in the dinosaur-era town of Bedrock is the same story no matter when you tell it. Fox Entertainment president Kevin Reilly said it best, declaring the network’s intention to introduce the prehistoric characters to a "whole new generation" as if that somehow makes it less of a blatant rip-off. "Fox has long been home to iconic families like the Simpsons and the Griffins, so I have no doubt that the Flintstones and the Rubbles are going to fit right in on our air," Reilly said. Production on this new gem of the small screen is scheduled to begin in the fall of 2011 and the show is unlikely to air until some time in 2013. "The Flintstones" will be a joint production between 20th Century Fox Television and Warners Bros. Television, the owners of the Hanna-Barbera animated library of shows and characters. The initial (and what should have been the only) animated version of “The Flintstones" first appeared on U.S. television in the 1960s. Numerous television specials, three Hollywood movies and videogames have ensued, but there obviously remains a never-ending line of people looking to cash in on the franchise…………


- Feeding opossums? Seriously? That’s what residents of one Oklahoma City neighborhood are accusing one of their neighbors of doing. Rule No. 1, whether at the zoo or in the wild, is that you do NOT feed the animals. That only encourages them to come back and makes them bolder and more belligerent. Yet one unidentified woman is allegedly doing just that. Her first crime against the neighborhood is an outright refusal to perform any sort of lawn maintenance, which has led to a yard so overgrown with weeds and brush that those weeds and brush are spilling into neighbor Mason Clymer’s yard. According to Clymer, who lives in the 3400 block of Northwest 52nd St., the woman next door’s unkempt yard is now endangering his pets and he doesn’t like it one bit. He says he has called the city multiple times to report the wild weeds, but didn’t consider the problem especially serious until an opossum allegedly ventured from the neighbor’s yard into his own and attacked his black Labrador, Bailey. "It like scratched her eye really bad right here. Then right under her eye and it was swollen," Clymer said. "I see opossums. Opossum and rats, like rats you would expect to see, you hear of stories in sewers, like foot-long rats." He also believes his neighbor is to blame because she has admitted to other resident that she feeds and shelters the opossums. Thomas Irvin lives across the street and claims that the woman who lives in the unkempt house told him she was feeding the opossums. “She said she had one old opossum and little ones and they lived in her garage and she was feeding them dog food," Irvin said. Attempts to contact the woman by a local TV station’s investigate team failed and the worsening situation isn't sitting well with those who live near her. "Everybody has pets but those aren't really pets, you know? They're rodents. I don't understand it," Clymer fumed. "I'm sick of it, you know? It's bringing down our property values. It's hurting my animals which is the main thing, you know? That's my family." City records show that the property owner has been cited by the city numerous times for tall weeds and grass and has paid more than $2,000 in fines because the city has had to come out and mow her property. Color me cynical, but this is a woman who doesn’t seem to care much about her property or those around her…………..


- LeBron James should probably stop talking right now and sit the next few plays out - or at least stop talking to Cleveland or about anything involving the city in any way. Since his ill-fated and ill-advised “The Decision” special on ESPN last summer and knifing the entire city of Cleveland in the back on national television, nothing James has said or done has lessened the sheer hatred for him in the city in which he played for seven years. Many Cavs fans will never stop hating him and thus his apology for “The Decision” that he issued right after his new team, the Miami Heat, dispatched Boston in the second round of the playoffs went over like a giant lead balloon. To Clevelanders, the apology after a huge triumph was like a former boyfriend or girlfriend who broke up with you in humiliating, public fashion coming back a year later with their hot, new significant other and issuing a flimsy apology for how things ended between the two of you. But James wasn’t done talking to C-Town, not by a long stretch. After the Cavs won the top pick in next month’s draft at Tuesday night’s NBA draft lottery, James again tried to get friendly with the city, the team and its fans by saying he’s sure the Cavs and the likely No. 1 pick in next month's draft, Duke's Kyrie Irving will be a good fit for each other. James said he was glad the way the lottery turned out. "I'm happy for the franchise and happy for the fans," James said after the Miami Heat's shootaround Wednesday morning prior to Game 2 of the Eastern Conference finals against the Chicago Bulls. "I think it is a good step for them." James has known Irving for the past three years, as the young guard has been a regular at James' summer Nike camps. “If the Cavs pick him it'll be a great pick for them," James said. "He's a true point guard who can score, in this day and age in the NBA it is a point guards' league. If they decided to take him, which it looks like, they'll have a good one." But wait, there’s more: James added some thoughtful exposition on Irving’s role with the franchise he decimated and kicked in the junk on the way out the door. “If it's Kyrie, I don't think you automatically place the franchise tag on him, but he's good enough where, if he continues to work hard, he could be that guy for that team," James stated. "It's a tough situation for anyone to be given the franchise tag coming out of college, but I think he's one of the kids who is up for the challenge." So there you go Cleveland, more happy thoughts from your pal LeBron…………


- Bring it on, Russia. Talk all you want about needing to develop a "significant nuclear potential" if the United States does not convince Moscow its missile defense system isn't aimed at your communist haven, but don’t expect those passive-aggressive threats to back the U.S. down. Russian President Dmitry Medvedev made the threat Wednesday and went on to say he is not convinced by American assurances that the proposed Europe-based system is not aimed at Russia. At a rare news conference, Medvedev struck a defiant tone. "There are no other countries apart from Russia which have those capabilities, and they will not have them in the years to come," he said. "If missile defense systems are to be developed -- which would mean the disruption of strategic parity -- the treaty could be suspended or even terminated," he said, referring to the New START accord for which President Barack Obama has campaigned. Medevedev really dialed the situation up a notch by intimating that the entire situation could result in a return to the Cold War, something he characterized as "a very bad scenario." Veiled threats to America and the suggestion that Russia could scrap the arms treaty may have flown well with the communist sycophants Medvedev bounced the idea off of, but Obama and other American officials probably won't receive the threats as warmly. But hey, there could be an agreeable middle ground on all of this, right? Umm, no. Medvedev stated Russia was willing to see the development of a European missile defense shield if it "complies with clear rules." The phrase “with clear rules” basically means, “Do what we want and there will be no problems.” Nice try, Dmitri………..


- May is a big month, health-wise. As prom-goers and anyone planning on hitting the beach this summer knows, May is the optimal time to hit up your local cancer box shop, a.k.a. tanning salon, to get your fake bake on. That means it’s the perfect time to hold Skin Cancer Awareness Month and futilely attempt to convince the superficial fools who pay good money to jam themselves into said cancer boxes that their longtime health and ability to avoid wrinkly, worn-put skin by the time they turn 45 is more important than looking orange enough for the prom or beach. And so the battle rages on between those that want to tan naturally and unnaturally and the agency trying to convince them to exercise caution. The American Cancer Society is fighting the good fight and reminding everyone that at present, about 120,000 new cases of melanoma in the US are diagnosed in a year and that overexposure to harmful UV rays that damage the skin's natural defense and can often lead to increased prevalence of killer melanoma. Tanning lovers are subsequently covering their ears and screaming “LALALALALALALALA!” at the top of their lungs, ignoring the fact that melanoma is the most serious form of skin cancer. If it is not caught early, it can advance and spread to other parts of the body, where it becomes hard to treat and can be fatal. Even though it is not the most common of the skin cancers, it causes the most deaths. Tanning beds have been under heavy scrutiny over the past few months from skin protection agencies and the Food and Drug Administration. These groups continue pointing to numerous studies providing evidence linking indoor tanning bed use to melanoma. The International Agency for Research on Cancer has piled on by suggesting that indoor tanning devices are carcinogenic to humans. Steven Q. Wang, MD, member of The Skin Cancer Foundation's independent Photobiology Committee and Director of Dermatologic Surgery and Dermatology at Memorial Sloan Kettering, Basking Ridge, New Jersey stated: "While the medical community has known anecdotally that indoor tanning is linked with melanoma, it has been difficult to provide the evidence. These new studies show conclusively that indoor tanning bed use can lead to melanoma." At present, tanning beds are regulated by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) as Class I medical devices, in the same safety category as elastic bandages and tongue depressors. Hopefully that will change soon and the Skin Cancer Foundation is using the month of May to launch a signature drive for a letter to the Surgeon General Benjamin asking her to urge the FDA to enact stricter regulations and more oversight of tanning beds. Or Americans could stop being so damn shallow and realize that dying young or turning into a wrinkled mass of flesh isn't worth a temporary tan. Umm, yeah……there’s definitely a much better chance of the FDA stepping in and forcing a change…………

Disney disrespect, discount gas mayhem and lies in Myanmar

- Verrrrry respectful, Disney, very respectful. While the rest of America and other parts of the world were celebrating the long-overdue demise of terrorist mastermind Osama bin Laden on May 2 at the hands of an elite Navy SEAL team, the Walt Disney Co. was rushing to put the finishing touches on its application for a trademark on the name "Seal Team 6," the name of the unit of specially trained Navy SEALs bin Laden in a raid in Pakistan. Disney actually filed three patents applications on May 3 — the day after the raid — with the U.S. Patent and Trademark office. The applications by Disney Enterprises Inc. state an intention to use the mark for a range of products, including entertainment and education services, clothing, toys, games and Christmas stockings. Not to say that Americans won't buy these products and that the hottest Halloween costume this fall won’t be either an Osama bin Laden mask with a bullet hole above the eye or a SEAL uniform, but couldn’t we have held off at least 48 hours before bum rushing the patent office to cash in. After all, we are still talking about the death of a human being, a human being who was behind the deaths of tens of thousands of other human beings during his life. Sadly, this is far from the first time a company has rushed to trademark a phrase, image or likeness tied to a major combat operation. Just one day after U.S. allied forces entered Iraq in 2003, Sony Corp. applied to trademark the war's catchphrase, "shock and awe," for use as the title of a video game. Sony eventually withdrew its application, but Disney has given no indication that it would consider doing so and actually seems hell bent on cashing in as early and often as possible on the likeness and image of those anonymous SEAL team members whose names we’ll never know and who will never receive any tangible reward for their efforts other than their normal paycheck and the anonymous gratitude of a nation. Well done, Disney…………


- One simple question: How was there not an all-out riot at a Vallero gas station in Wilmington, Calif. Sunday between 8:30 and 11:30 a.m.? With gas prices at or near $4 (or $5 in some places around the country), any time the numbers on those giant digital boards outside the local BP, Speedway or Chevron station begin with a 3 is cause for an absolute fistfight for a spot at the pump. As such, how was no one shot, stabbed or beaten when a temporary computer glitch at the Vallero station allowed drivers to fill up for $1.10 a gallon? No one under the age of 50 remembers paying that little for gas on a regular basis, so gas that cheap was bound to cause a melee. Sure enough, customers rushed to take advantage of the discounted fuel for four hours as word quickly spread around the area. “I was shocked that it even happened,” said Aureliano Galvez, who took advantage of the slashed prices to fill up his tank. Station owner Kenny Nguyen said that 8,000 gallons of gas were sold during glitch resulting in a loss of $21,000. To many, that sort of loss might be just desserts for anyone associated with a gas station, even if the owner of one local station losing $21,000 has no effect whatsoever on oil companies and the price they’re charging those station owners for their product. Ultimately, the true miracle of the day (other than dirt cheap gas) was that no one pulled out their 9mm or Bowie knife when someone tried to crowd in front of them for a shot at the cheapest gas anyone alive will probably see during their lifetime. Big ups to the people of Wilmington for conducting themselves with a reasonable amount of restraint during this golden opportunity and not sending anyone to the emergency room with a gunshot or stab wound just because they tried to edge in front of someone else to fill the tank of their Chevy Cobalt…………


- Nice try, Burmese officials, nice try. The country more commonly known as Myanmar may think it’s doing something positive by releasing more than 14,600 prisoners under a clemency program, but in reality the prisoners are no one of consequence and their number includes very few political prisoners. Prison Department Director General Zaw Win announced the release of the convicts, including 2,166 women, to take place by the end of the day Tuesday. The convicts were to be freed Tuesday from jails around the country under the new program, which commutes death sentences to life imprisonment and cuts one year from other convicts' prison terms. It has drawn intense criticism from many who expected the sentencing cuts to be more severe. Human rights groups have unanimously ripped the program as too weak and not addressing the issues involved. Those groups could have a point, as cutting one year from the sentence of prisoners serving sentences of up to 65 years isn't going to make much of an impact. But hey, it’s an improvement over the usual practice of granting token amnesties to mark important national days. There hasn’t been one of those since 2009, when 7,114 prisoners were freed. Typically, only petty criminals are released but a handful of lesser political detainees occasionally find their way into the mix. With thousands of wrongly detained political prisoners, both from the pro-democracy movement and from out-of-favor factions in the government, rotting away under life sentences, the government doesn’t seem all that eager to address cases of a true significance. The government did have a humorous response on the issue of political prisoners. When asked how many political prisoners were among those to be released, Zaw Win reiterated the government's position that it has no political detainees. He did allow that "some prisoners who are charged under emergency laws and for links with illegal organizations will be among those freed." Those so-called emergency laws are vague, general security statutes usually used to prosecute political activists accused of having ties to banned political groups. Among the prominent detainees with no hope of being released any time soon or probably ever are activist Min Ko Naing (serving a 65-year prison sentence) and ethnic minority leader Hkun Htun Oo (serving a sentence of 80 years). They have company in the form of scores of former intelligence officers who were on the losing side of a power struggle and are now living life behind bars. None of these individuals is going to sniff an amnesty program this century. The U.S. State Department responded to Monday’s announcement by reiterating its call that all political prisoners be released immediately. In total, Myanmar has more than 60,000 prisoners in 42 prisons and 109 labor camps. Given the level of government oppression and intolerance, those numbers are shockingly…….low……….


- New Yorkers inevitably esteem themselves as better than just about everyone else. Their city is the best and the most interesting and if you don’t believe that, just ask any Manhattan resident. Mayor Michael Bloomberg wants to further that superiority complex with his new plan to make New York “the premier digital city.” Bloomberg’s plan includes a redesign of the city’s website with the ultimate goal of enhancing social media as a means of allowing citizens to more easily engage with the city government. “Digital media has an enormous potential to enrich our economy and strengthen our civil life and this road map will show us the way,” Bloomberg said. To launch the initiative, the city will hold a weekend-long “hackathon” in which
developers and designers will be invited to create prototypes for the nyc.gov web site. City officials are also building digital partnerships with social media companies including Facebook, Tumblr and Foursquare in an effort to update New York City’s social-media presence. Foursquare, known as the app losers who are too attached to their smartphones use to check in everywhere they go before they actually do what they went to that place to do in the first place, will team with NYC to allow visitors and residents to digitally check in when they arrive at public spaces and people will be rewarded with a virtual badge when they check in at enough parks and cultural centers. “Foursquare grew out of the New York tech scene, and we are super excited to continue to contribute to the growth of that community and to New York’s emergence as the nation’s leading digital city,” said Foursquare CEO and Co-Founder Dennis Crowley. The city will also update and streamline its Facebook page with resident polls and a direct link to 311. Lastly, a Twitter account under the name @nycgov will also provide residents with real-time updates on city news and services. In other words, everything iPhone, Android and BlackBerry users already do on their phones and have no need for government assistance with will now get some good old-fashioned government assistance……….


- Thanks for stating the blatantly obvious, Boston Celtics coach Doc Rivers. River said Monday that the biggest fallout from the much-maligned mid-February trade that sent Kendrick Perkins to the Oklahoma City Thunder was the resulting lack of continuity between the new players and the rupture the trade caused in locker room chemistry. Rivers said that if given the chance to make the decision over again, he would have waited until the end of the season to make the trade. "I would wait until after the year was over. I'll put it that way," Rivers said in an interview with a Boston radio station. "I do think Jeff Green has a chance to be a starter for us in the future and a hell of a basketball player, and [Nenad] Krstic can help, but making that trade at the time we made that trade, that made it very tough for us. And not only that, we added other pieces as well that we tried to fit in, so it was just a lot of moving parts to a team that the advantage that we had was that we had continuity, everybody else was new. Chicago was new and the Heat were new. They couldn't
fall back on what we could fall back on with our starting five, and once we made that trade, we took
that advantage away." The deal sent Perkins and guard Nate Robinson to Oklahoma City in exchange for Green, Krstic, and a future first-round pick. The Celtics made another trade that sent reserve big men Luke Harangody and Semih Erden to Cleveland, further turning over the roster. At the time, the team’s veterans were noticeably upset about having Perkins, a trusted and beloved teammate, shipped out. They went just 15-12 down the stretch and seemed to have lost their edge. After sweeping the New York Knicks in the first round of the playoffs, the Celtics were pummeled in the second round by the Miami Heat and looked old, slow and disjointed. "Well, it was more not that the trust went away, the know-how went away, the continuity went away," Rivers said of the Perkins trade. "That's what the trade affected more than anything. Obviously [Perkins] was great to our team and all of that, but it was more that you had new guys playing different positions and you had a floor guy who could literally reach back into a playbook and throw out something that was three or four years old and they all knew it, when Perk was there. When you lose Perk, you take that one guy out of that starting lineup. Now there's the fifth guy who doesn't know your offense three years ago. He only knows what he knows since he's been there, and that limited our group.” So why make the trade and lean so heavily on 39-year-old center Shaquille O’Neal, who was injured at the time of the trade and never recovered enough to help the team at all? Perkins intimated that an instant chemistry developed between O'Neal and the Celtics' other four usual starters, giving the team the confidence it needed to move Perkins. Needless to say, trading away a key piece from a championship contender didn’t work out well and now the Celtics are in need of a drastic offseason overhaul…………

Movie news, downsizing dogs in China and more Dubai excess

- The one-child-per-family rule has gone so well for China, its largest city is taking the idea a step further by enacting a limit of one dog per family in an effort to gain control over its soaring pet population and curb rabies. Shanghai’s new ordinance has led pet owners with multiple dogs to find ways to conceal their plethora of pooches, be it walking them at night or leaving one with family members. The rule officially goes into effect Monday and would necessitate selling or giving away extra dogs if a person has more than one. Shanghai's new pet ownership rules aren’t all anti-dog; part of the law reduces fees for dog registration in hopes of bringing more undocumented dogs onto the books. However, Shanghai dog owners will now be subjected to leash laws just like residents of hundreds of other cities around the world, which is the one part of the law no one should have an issue with - at least no one who walks on two feet instead of four paws. The need for tougher dog laws is obvious, as only about 140,000 of Shanghai's estimated 800,000 dogs have been registered under current rules. Those rules are extremely tough on owners, demanding a $300 annual fee for those living downtown and half that for those in the suburbs. Under the new measures, the fees will drop to $75 for downtown residents, $45 for those in suburbs and $14 for rural residents. On top of those costs, dog owners will also have to pay $6 for rabies shots. Beijing and Guangzhou have implemented similar policies for pooches, but the response has not been overly favorable in any one location. To many Chinese, the laws represent a repressive regime intruding further into their lives and reaching back to a bygone era of decades past in which pet keeping was deemed an anti-communist, bourgeoisie luxury. Shanghai does conduct occasional sweeps for unlicensed dogs, but officials clearly hope those efforts will be less necessary under the new law. Then again, many dog owners will probably send their extra canines to live with friends or family in the country until the heat dies down and then go right back to violating the law just as they always have……………


-Dubai is a place known for its wretched excess, to the point one Dubai mall eatery wasted tens of thousands of dollars on a life-sized, decorative Michael Jordan statue but didn’t bother to make sure the statue was accurate in that it featured Jordan with a No. 32 jersey instead of the number he made famous with the Chicago Bulls, 23. A place with that sort of mentality is the perfect place for someone like Argentinean soccer legend Diego Maradona, who is such a fan of wretched excess that he was once hospitalized after going on a food bender. His flair for expensive fashion, beautiful women and fast cars makes him perfect for Dubai and so it’s fitting that Dubai's Al Wasl soccer club has made Maradona an offer to be its next coach and talks are ongoing. The club confirmed its interest in the Argentine great, who has been out of coaching since he led Argentina to the 2010 World Cup quarterfinals but was not retained as coach for reasons that were never fully explained. Maradona is in Dubai and was spotted at Al Wasl headquarters and out shopping at the Dubai Mall. Ashraf Ahmad Mohammad, the club's chief executive officer, characterized his feelings as s "happy" with the negotiations thus far while cautioning that it would take several more days for an agreement. The club had hinted at a possible announcement Sunday, but that never materialized. It has been stuck in a holding pattern since firing Sergio Farias in March and currently ranks fourth in the domestic league. Signing the 1986 World Cup winner would generate headlines, but Maradona does not have a wealth of managerial experience. Prior to coaching Argentina from 2008-10, he had only coached Deportivo Mandiyu in 1994 and Racing Club in 1995. Both times, he stepped down before his contract was up. In other words, he’s not a “see things through” type of guy when it comes to leading a team. His results were varied as Argentina’s national coach, with some small victories but also two of the team’s worst losses ever -- a 6-1 hammering by Bolivia in 2010 World Cup qualifying and a 4-0 quarterfinal defeat to Germany at the tournament. Maradona’s name has been linked to an eclectic mix of jobs since losing the Argentina job last year, including Iran's national team and several English clubs including Blackburn and Fulham. Now, he may have found a place that suits him perfectly……………


- What is wrong with the authorities in Fall River and New Bedford, Mass. and how can it be fixed? These fools are openly seeking to deprive their constituents of one of the best stoner-ific food treats around by ripping Lazy Cakes from store shelves. What are Lazy Cakes? On the Lazy Cakes Facebook page, the manufacturer calls the product, “A tasty chocolate treat that brings on the ultimate state of relaxation.” Sounds suspicious like a pot brownie that the resident stoner in your office makes and leaves in the conference room just to jerk with everyone, but tell me more. “The magic of Lazy Cakes, the original relaxation brownie, is in its proprietary blend that includes herbal relaxation aids melatonin, Valerian Root Extract, Rose Hips Extract, and Passion Flower,” the company explained. So technically the treats aren’t laced with the one ingredient that would truly make them Lazy Cakes, but melatonin is close enough and if you asked leaders like Fall River Mayor William Flanagan, too close. “These brownies are laced with melatonin,” he said at a news conference Thursday. “Melatonin is a sleep aid. If someone wants to buy melatonin, that’s fine, but it shouldn’t be in a brownie that’s packaged to attract kids.” Hang on there, Mayor McBuzzkill. Are Lazy Cakes really a danger to kids? Just because they contain eight milligrams of melatonin in each of the brownies in a package doesn’t mean kids are going to chow down on them. Besides, we need to hear the other side of the issue before making any final decisions, so let’s hear from Terry Harris, CEO of HBB, LLC, makers of Lazy Cakes. Harris issued the following statement: “We have not been contacted by the Mayor’s office in regard to their specific questions about our product but we welcome a conversation with Mr. Flanagan. We created Lazy Cakes to provide adults with a great-tasting way to combat the stress associated with our fast-paced lives. Ingredients include items that anyone can purchase at any health food or vitamin store, such as melatonin, Valerian Root Extract, Rose Hips Extract, and Passion Flower. Each Brownie is clearly labeled to indicate that we recommend that Lazy Cakes be enjoyed by adults only. We encourage parents to check the label before providing this or any product to their children.” The statement did not sway Wet Blanket Flanagan, who insists Lazy Cakes should be banned from store shelves in his town and has asked the city council to pass an ordinance to make it happen. He has company in the pursuit from New Bedford City Councilor Bruce Duarte, Jr., who has filed a motion to set an ordinance in his city to ban or regulate the sale of Lazy Cakes. Thanks for ruining everyone else’s fun, you tools………….


- Quests for world domination often involve making difficult choices: Do I invade an unsuspecting country with an overwhelming show of force or just nuke them off the map, should I have a peanut butter sandwich or filet mignon before announcing that I’m now dictator for life, things along those lines. Oh, and do we launch a line of über-cheap notebook computers that eschew the traditional, localized platform and long-running BIOS start-up process of Microsoft Windows laptops for Web applications and machines with minimal Flash storage that load within 8 seconds. That’s the question Google has asked itself and answered by creating new notebooks from Samsung and Acer and unveiling them at the Google I/O developer conference May 11. Chrome OS is the search engine's Web-based platform for computers and it is a marked departure from the computing norm. Taking its biggest gamble on its cloud computing reputation is a risky play for Google, but the company hopes the Samsung Series 5 Chromebook and Acer's 11.6-inch model Chromebook will be a huge hit. Samsung’s version will sport a 12.1-inch screen and will cost $429 for WiFi-only, while the WiFi+3G model will run $499. Acer, known for crappy, low-end computers, will feature fewer bells and whistles on its model, which will cost $349. Both Chromebook models will be available online June 15 at Amazon and Best Buy in the U.S., as well as in the UK, France, Germany, Netherlands, Italy and Spain. Another interesting feature of the Chromebook is Google’s plan to use it as a subscription service. Businesses can purchase the chintzy computers in bulk for $28 per user, per month and schools may do the same for $20 per user, per month. However, both plans require a three-year service agreement that includes a warranty, support, service, and hardware replacements when necessary. The big question is how quickly and fully users will embrace the idea of being completely dependent on the cloud computing approach. Even a lightweight machine weighing in at 3.3 pounds and booting up within 8 seconds is only a positive if the cloud computing system is fully reliable…………


- Thor kept the hammer in its hand for the second straight weekend and crushed the competition at the box office, winning the earnings race with $34.5 million. Although the film remains short of the break-even point (having made $119.2 million of its $150 million budget back), it’s two-week total is as successful a start as Paramount could have hoped for. Second place went to a movie unapologetically positioning itself as the female doppelganger of The Hangover, the chick flick known as Bridesmaids. In its debut weekend, the Kristen Wiig-written film made $24.4 million and did better than expected overall. Fast Five continued its own über-strong start with $19.6 million for third place and a whopping cumulative total of $168.8 million after three weeks of work. Demonic “thriller” Priest finally debuted and predictably failed to match the hype by finishing fourth and making a so-so $14.5 million despite opening wide in 2,864 theaters. The last among the top five was Rio, still hanging near the top five weeks after debuting by adding $8 million to its coffers to elevate its five-week total to $125 million. The remainder of the top 10 consisted of: Jumping the Broom (a truly terrible movie that came in at No. 6 with $7.3 million and had made just $25.9 million for two weeks), Something Borrowed (No. 7 overall but a distant third among wedding-related comedies for the weekend with $7 million), Water for Elephants (No. 8 thanks to a $4.1 million effort and with $48.5 million through four weeks), the apocalyptically awful Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Big Happy Family (No. 9 with a whopping $2.2 million for a four-week total of $50.2 million) and Soul Surfer (No. 10 with $1,800,000 and $39,200,000 overall). Dropping out of the top 10 from last weekend were Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil (No. 11) and Prom (No. 14 and fading fast after just three weeks of release. One other noteworthy debut was Everything Must Go, the indie dramedy starring Will Ferrell in an unusually serious role for him. Everything opened in a mere 218 theaters, yet boasted a solid $3,784 per-theater average………….

Tiger trouble, Dylan haters and badass sherpas

- Thursday was a good day for neither Tiger Woods nor the PGA Tour in general. Woods suffered the latest setback in a series of injuries and personal issues that has stretched from November 2009, when he was (allegedly) chased from his Orlando-area home by his then-wife Elin on Thanksgiving night and bounced his SUV off both a tree and fire hydrant, withdrawing after nine holes at The Players Championship event at TPC Sawgrass due to knee and Achilles injuries. Woods shot a 42 on the opening nine holes, clearly wasn’t right physically and hit the eject button. Suffering another injury five weeks before the U.S. Open could be disastrous for Woods if he is unable to rehab in time to get back on track for the Open at Congressional in Washington, D.C. Depending on the severity of the injury, Woods might be wise to shut himself down for the rest of the season. In light of his withdrawal, rumors began circulating that perhaps PGA commissioner Tim Finchem and the tour’s brass pressured Woods to return in order to bring eyeballs to the event. When asked about that theory, Finchem didn’t react favorably. "It's always important for Tiger to be part of the tour, because he's Tiger Woods. But the idea that we would pressure him to play is ludicrous," Finchem said. "We don't pressure any player to play the tournament. In this case the suggestion is somehow he was hurt and we got him to play anyway. Tiger doesn't [play] a tournament unless he thinks he can win. I was on the range with him Tuesday, I watched him hit balls. He practiced that day, he practiced Wednesday hard. And he tweaked it yesterday. So, non-issue." Okay, so it’s a non-issue……..or is it? Woods certainly did not show up to the event ready to win or even play well, but could he have simply been using the event to knock off the rust after not playing a competitive round of golf since the Masters in early April? Let’s hear from Woods. "The knee acted up and then the Achilles followed after that and then the calf started cramping up," he said Thursday. "Everything started getting tight, so it's just a whole chain reaction." Chain reaction it is……………


- Give it up for freaking Apa Sherpa, world. If you don’t know who Apa Sherpa is…..now you know and well you should, because Apa Sherpa is the man who reached the top of Mount Everest for the 21st time on Wednesday, breaking a record he set last year for the number of ascents of the world's tallest peak. A Nepalese tourism ministry official confirmed the feat, which has been in the making since. Sherpa first climbed Everest in 1990 while helping international expeditions climb the mountain. He has continued climbing over the years and since 2008, Sherpa has been climbing Everest annually as part of an expedition to highlight the effects of climate change and to collect trash on the mountains. His 21st trek to the top of the mountain ended after a final leg Sherpa started from Camp IV at an altitude of 7,950 meters with five other climbers on Tuesday night. The climbing party reached the top of the mountain on Wednesday morning, according to Asian Trekking, which organized the expedition. In a reasonably wise move, those involved made Sherpa the climbing leader of the expedition, which sought to collect trash such as oxygen cylinders, tent poles, tents and other mountaineering equipment from the mountain. For anyone who has ever dreamt of scaling Everest just once in their life, Sherpa’s feat is amazing beyond belief. Heck, it’s amazing for the lazy American couch potato whose biggest aspiration is being able to make a fudge bar run to the kitchen and back without gasping for air and needing an oxygen mask……………


- What exactly did iconic rocker Bob Dylan give up to perform a series of concerts in China earlier this year? Word on the street is Bobby D surrendered creative control to The Man, allowing the Chinese government final approval over his set list for the shows. Dylan isn't taking kindly to those rumors, striking back at suggestions that he gave in to censorship during the series of concerts in China. Numerous news stories have criticized him for omitting some of his 1960s-era protest songs from the shows, but Dylan offered a nondescript defense to those charges in a post on his website. In that post, he insisted he knew nothing of any censorship and stated that he and his band played all the songs they intended to. A cynic might argue that a man who rose to fame in the 1960s as an icon of the anti-war movement in the era of the Vietnam War would not willingly leave out legendary tunes such as “The Times They Are a-Changin'” and “Like a Rolling Stone,” but perhaps Dylan would counter with the reasoning that his catalogue of 34 studio albums leaves him more than enough to pick from even without songs which became synonymous with the counterculture of the 1960s. His famed, long tours - often known as the Never-Ending Tour - leave him playing as many as 100 times each year. Dylan is also well-known for ever-changing set lists that leave diehard fans infuriated because they show up wanting and expecting to hear specific songs from his early years. In response to criticism of the China leg of his current tour, Dylan wrote: "As far as censorship goes, the Chinese government had asked for the names of the songs that I would be playing. There's no logical answer to that, so we sent them the set lists from the previous three months. If there were any songs, verses or lines censored, nobody ever told me about it and we played all the songs that we intended to play." Perhaps criticism for his China shows is coming from those who resent him for visiting the communist nation in the first place. One of Dylan’s most vocal critics on the issue has been New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd. "The idea that the raspy troubadour of '60s freedom anthems would go to a dictatorship and not sing those anthems is a whole new kind of sellout," Dowd wrote before also ripping Dylan for not mentioning artist Ai Wei Wei, who was detained by Chinese authorities in the days before to his first show in China. "He sang his censored set, took his pile of Communist cash and left," Dowd penned. As for the shows themselves Dylan wrote that the crowd knew his material well and received him enthusiastically. "Regardless, they responded enthusiastically to the songs on my last 4 or 5 records. Ask anyone who was there. They were young and my feeling was that they wouldn't have known my early songs anyway," he wrote…………


- Oopsie! Sorry, thousands of would-be American immigrants who thought you had finally snagged that elusive green card. You may have believed your wait was over, but the State Department has other ideas. In fact, the State Department apologized Friday for a computer glitch that invalidated results for thousands who thought they were chosen in the most recent green card visa lottery. With just 50,000 permanent resident visas issued a year for millions of aspiring immigrants, the competition is intense and winning a green card is, in many ways, like winning an actual lottery for participants. The selection process is done randomly by computer, with would-be (legal) border crashers selected to undergo interviews, background checks and medical exams before visas can be issued. This time around, the computer f*cked up and as such, those who thought they had cleared the biggest hurdle to becoming a resident of these here United States are sh*t out of luck. "Due to a computer programming problem, the results of the 2012 diversity lottery that were previously posted on this website have been voided," the State Department said in a statement Friday. "We regret any inconvenience this might have caused." Oh no, no inconvenience at all. Just falsely raising the hopes and dreams of desperate people around the world. So what is this bizarre anomaly inside some State Department desktop unit? "They did not represent a fair random selection of the entrants, which is required by U.S. law," said David Donahue, a deputy assistant for the State Department. Umm…….okay? That doesn’t really tell us anything either, but Donahue did confirm the problem has been fixed and officials expect to do another selection in July, Donahue said. Until then, good luck sweeping up the remnants of your crushed dreams from the floor, aspiring Americans…………


- Louis Camilleri: freaking genius or ginormous ass hat? This writer’s vote goes for the latter after Camilleri, CEO of Philip Morris International, spoke out Wednesday during an annual shareholder meeting in New York with the revelation that smoking "is not that hard to quit." His comment came in response to a question from a cancer nurse and after initially appearing to stray on the side of politically correct corporate speak, he came off the rails. "We take our responsibility very seriously, and I don't think we get enough recognition for the efforts we make to ensure that there is effective worldwide regulation of a product that is harmful and that is addictive," Camilleri said. "Nevertheless, whilst it is addictive, it is not that hard to quit." Not hard to quit? My man, the billion-dollar industry that is smoking cessation (patches, drugs, etc.) begs to differ. What could possibly be going through the mind of the CEO of a major international corporation, telling someone in very public fashion something his own company has since come out and disputed? Camilleri wants anti-smoking groups to stay out of his business’ business, clearly. His outburst was directed at Elisabeth Gundersen, a nurse from San Francisco, who cited statistics that smoking causes nearly 5 million deaths annually worldwide. Since Camilleri's remarks, Philip Morris has directly contradicted its CEO by insisting "tobacco products are addictive and harmful.” The totals truly are staggering in the world smoking picture, with 1 billion losers, er, smokers globally, according to the World Health Organization. Just as a quick statistical reminder for those who have lost track of their alarming, sickening smoking figures of late, smoking accounts for one in five deaths in the U.S., --taking more lives than HIV, alcohol use, suicides, murders and illegal drug use combined. Furthermore, 45 percent of U.S. smokers try to quit each year, but only 4 to 7 percent are successful, according to the U.S. Public Health Service. Those numbers make it sound an awful lot like Camilleri is talking out his ass and/or lying through his teeth. But hey, Phillip Morris saw a 14-percent increase in profits last year despite falling demand for tobacco products and remains the largest non-government-regulated cigarette seller in the world, so life is good at PMI…………

FARC and Hugo, religion hard-wired into humans and the Celtics keep their doc

- Where do a person’s beliefs and views on the afterlife and on religion come from? According to a new study conducted by researchers at Oxford University, religion comes naturally, even instinctively, to human beings. As per the results of a massive new study of cultures all around the world, that tendency toward religion is rooted deep in an individual’s psyche. "We tend to see purpose in the world," Oxford University professor Roger Trigg said. "We see agency. We think that something is there even if you can't see it. ... All this tends to build up to a religious way of thinking." Trigg is co-director of the three-year Oxford-based project, which surveyed more than 40 different studies by dozens of researchers around the world. The studies ranged from China to Poland, from the United States to Micronesia and many countries in between. But in spite of their cultural and geographical differences, the studies all arrived at relatively similar conclusions, including widespread belief in some kind of afterlife and an instinctive tendency to suggest that natural phenomena happen for a purpose. "Children in particular found it very easy to think in religious ways," such as believing in God's omniscience, said Trigg. Researchers also found adults were extremely eager to seize upon explanations that implied an unseen agent at work in the world. One topic Trigg and his team did not explore as part of their research was whether God, gods or an afterlife exist. Justin Barrett, the project's other co-director explained that the validity of a person’s religious beliefs was not one of the study’s aims. "This project does not set out to prove God or gods exist. Just because we find it easier to think in a particular way does not mean that it is true in fact," Barrett said. Oddly enough, Trigg believes both atheists and religious people could use the study to argue their sides of the God debate. "Dawkins would accept our findings and say we've got to grow out of it," Trigg argued of famed secularist Richard Dawkins. Conversely, he insisted people of faith could argue that the universality of religious sentiment serves God's purpose. "Religious people would say, 'If there is a God, then ... he would have given us inclinations to look for him,'" Trigg declared. While deciding whether or not God exists was not part of the study, its findings could definitely have an impact on the notion of religious freedom. If something is deep-seated in human nature and people suppress that part of them, that would seem decidedly unhealthy. In the end, the Oxford study, known as the Cognition, Religion and Theology Project, suggests that religion is not likely to fade from the world any time soon…………


- Two of the NBA’s iconic franchises ended their respective seasons in differing, yet equally disappointing fashion over the past week. The Los Angeles Lakers melted down, were swept by the Dallas Mavericks and went full-on goon in the series’ deciding game by dishing out excessively hard fouls and cheap shots as they went. Coach Phil Jackson made it clear long before the playoffs he was done coaching after this season and the Lakers knew once it was over, they would have to find a new coach. The end was a bit more dignified for the Boston Celtics, who were bounced by the Miami Heat in their Eastern Conference semifinal series 4-1 in a beatdown that signified the end of an era for an aging team. Roster questions abound for the over-the-hill Celtics just as they do for the Lakers and like their bitter rivals from the West Coast, the Celtics had major questions about their coach…….until today. Doc Rivers, who was universally expected to take a season off, watch his son play basketball and possibly do some television work, reversed course and said immediately after the series ended that he planned on returning next season. Then, less than 48 hours after the season ended, Celtics president of basketball operations Danny Ainge informed the media at his end-of-season news conference the he and Rivers had agreed to a five-year contract extension. "I think Doc is the best coach in the league, so I think it's great for us, to have him around," Ainge said. The value of the contract is believed to be in the range of $6 to $7 million per year and its announcement was met with immediate and profound approval from Celtics players. "If we're moving forward next year and trying to win a championship, he's one of the main pieces," forward Paul Pierce said. Hearing statements like that would have seemed jarring and out of place as recently as five years ago, when Rivers had not yet won a championship (which he did with the Celtics in 2008) and was known as a coach who juggled his rotation too much and wasn’t a good tactician. He has now coached Boston for seven years after five years in Orlando and also played in the NBA for 13 seasons. He has a career mark of 507-406 and a Coach of the Year honor from his with the Magic to go with his championship ring. His return means the Celtics are likely to bring back their aging core of Pierce, Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen, but unless the team supplements those three with a legitimate center and a deeper, more athletic bench, bringing back Rivers is nothing more than one step in a major rebuilding process…………


- Going to the dentist is never a pleasant experience, even if it’s for a routine cleaning. No one likes lying on them back in an uncomfortable, vinyl-covered chair as a quasi-stranger pries inside your mouth, asks you questions you cannot actually articulate your answers to and charges you or your insurance a ridiculous amount of money for that privilege. Bearing that in mind, one Texas dentist is taking a difference approach to dentistry by adding something many people do actually enjoy to a dentist appointment: alcohol. Knowing that getting buzzed is a) something a lot of people like to do and b) takes the edge off some of life’s more unpleasant experiences, dentist Clint Herzog offers beer and wine to patients in the waiting room at his "Floss Now" dentistry office. The waiting room is tricked out like a nightclub and the bar offers signature, dental-themed drinks to help create the mood. To announce the new addition to his practice, Herzog sent out a direct mail piece offering "free spirits with a cleaning" to help ease the nerves of patients who are apprehensive about climbing into the dentist’s chair. Once the edge is taken off, patients then have their teeth cleaned and their procedures done. To top off a great day at the dentist’s office, Herzog also offers free teeth whitening to patients. "We give free whitening to all of our patients because that's like the adult lollipop," explained Herzog. "I thought it was fantastic especially the whitening part because I pay for that so if I could get it for free why wouldn't I," said Robin Cappel, one of Herzog’s patients. Both the free whitening and the free booze are available at all of Herzong’s offices, with two new locations opening soon in Austin and Houston. So far, no problems have arisen from giving free alcohol to patients, but there seems like a decent chance that at some point there will be one patient who can’t handle his or her liquor well, has one drink too many and gets a bit belligerent when Herzog wants them to open wide and say “AHHHHHHH.” In the event that happens, it may be time to drop a Breathalyzer test outside the door to the exam room………….


- Steven Tyler’s musical standards are so low at this point, it’s essentially possible to roll over the bar he’s set. Once a person makes the decision to join the running musical abortion that is American Karaoke, all pretenses of musical credibility are gone and no project, no collaborator and no endeavor is beneath a person. Thus, it came as no surprise that Tyler is working with Johnny Depp on a new song, something Tyler recently revealed to Billboard. "We've been hanging out here and there," Depp said at the "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" on May 7. "He's someone I've admired greatly for such a long time. The idea of writing songs with him is a dream come true." Tyler confirmed this week that he and Depp have been hanging out at the actor’s L.A. studio during Tyler’s time off from judging aspiring hack karaoke-ers on American Karaoke. "He asked me, he said, 'I want you to come over' -- he's got a studio here in L.A. -- 'and see if I'm playing "Seasons of Wither" right.' I said, 'Y'know what, Johnny? No matter how you play it, it's gonna be right. It's a beautiful thing,'" Tyler explained. Telling an actor dabbling in music he’s “gonna be right” no matter how he plays a classic song? Wow. American Karaoke clearly pollutes a person’s musical soul and thought pattern quickly and has ruined Tyler’s creative process going forward. In addition to revealing the musical depths he’s sinking to with Depp, Tyler also promoted his new autobiography his new solo single, "(It) Feels So Good." He went on to praise Depp by saying he would want the actor to play him in a movie version of his life. Asked about that possibility, Depp said, "I'll give it a shot. Why not?" Hmm, a role based on the life of a guy who has had more sex, more drugs and rocked more than just about anyone in rock and roll over the past four decades? Yeah, that sounds like it might be fun…………


- Hugo Chavez doesn’t need any help in terrorizing his own populace, Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia. The Venezuelan dictator is perfectly proficient in trampling the rights of his citizenry without any outside help, so why are leftist guerrillas with FARC offering Venezuela's intelligence agency "training in urban terrorism involving targeted killings" and suggesting they were willing to assassinate opponents of Chavez? According to a new study of the Colombian rebels' records, that’s exactly what the group has done over the past several years. In turn, Chavez offered to provide FARC with $300 million and weapons. In the end (and fortunately for the Venezuelan people) those deals apparently fell through, according to e-mails and documents seized from a key FARC leader. Venezuelan officials quickly disputed the report, which was provided by the London-based International Institute for Strategic Studies. The book-length document breaks down the Colombian rebels' relationship with Venezuela and Ecuador in painstaking detail, covering nearly three decades’ worth of strategic documents and recent e-mails belonging to FARC leader Luis Edgar Devía Silva, whose nom de guerre was Raul Reyes. Reyes was killed in a 2008 raid, leaving behind the digital records that have just now been sorted through. FARC is commonly known as Latin America's oldest, largest, most capable, and best-equipped insurgency of Marxist origin even though its involvement in Marxist goals is presently minimal. Still, both the United States and European Union consider FARC a terrorist group. The group gained tractions in Venezuela after Chavez became president/dictator in 1999 despite the dictator’s claims that his country would remain neutral in the conflict between FARC and the Colombian government. Neutrality wasn’t the applicable term when Chavez's government funded FARC's office in Caracas and gave it access to Venezuela's intelligence services, something else contained in the report. "Following the 2002 coup which briefly removed Chavez from power...," the report said, "FARC also responded to requests from (Venezuela's intelligence service) to provide training in urban terrorism involving targeted killings and the use of explosives. Furthermore, the archive offers tantalizing but ultimately unproven suggestions that FARC may have undertaken assassinations of Chavez's political opponents on behalf of the Venezuelan state.” The initial Venezuelan response came from the Venezuelan Embassy in Washington, which ripped the documents as unreliable and dismissed the credibility of the British institute's book, which is called "The FARC Files: Venezuela, Ecuador and the Secret Archive of Raul Reyes." Beyond that, Colombian officials refused comment on the report and cited only "basic inaccuracies" in it. What no one questions is the affable relationship between Venezuela and FARC and their mutual dislike of the U.S. FARC’s involvement in Ecuador has been less substantial, the report found, but the group was still able to establish strongholds in Ecuador's border regions next to Colombia in the 1990s, where the rebels produced and sold cocaine for income. Its presence in Ecuador grew as Ecuadorian politics moved left and FARC "was successful in fomenting discord between Ecuador and Colombia," the study said. Ultimately, the report doesn’t paint an especially optimistic picture of FARC’s future, saying it has now fallen "to a low ebb" following Colombia's security crackdowns through the countryside where the rebels have been based and is suffering desertions. Of course, none of that will make as many headlines as the idea that a foreign terrorist group is offering help in murdering another country’s opposition voices…………

Testimonies to America's FAT-ness, the cost of a revolution and Google battles Facebook

- It’s not only opponents of shameless cash grab attempts from studios blindly green-lighting totally unnecessary sequels to successful movies franchises that have run their course who have a problem with Will Smith's new film "Men in Black III." The movie, still filming, is also drawing the ire of the locals in the New York City neighborhood where it's being filmed. "This has just taken over the neighborhood," said SoHo resident Cathey Dillian. She was referring not only to the movie itself, but to Smith’s double decker luxury trailer, which has been parked on Broome Street for weeks. The 22-wheeler top of the line trailer weighs 30 tons, measures 53 feet in width, can expand up and houses a lounge and a movie room. But even that wealth of space isn't enough to meet all of Smith’s needs and he also has a second trailer that houses his gym. Taking up that much space anywhere in New York City is bound to draw the ire of the locals and Dillian and her fellow SoHo residents are livid with Smith. "I think it's a threat to the neighborhood's air quality, peace of mind, I think it's over the top," Dillian said. Local business owners have lamented the trailers blocking off large chunks of the street and preventing them from getting trucks where they need to be and making deliveries. Unfortunately, the multi-million dollar motor home doesn't violate any regulations and Smith obtained all of the proper permits to park it. Still, enough complaints were directed to the film’s production company and the officials to convince all involved parties that moving the trailer was the best decision. The city ordered Smith to move the trailer immediately and find a new, less intrusive location - as if a truly convenient, non-intrusive location for the trailers. A few select SoHo residents have actually welcomed the film’s presence, inconveniences and all, because of the extra dollars pumped into their economy by the massive number of cast and crew members hanging out and spending their per diem. As for Smith, he refused comment on the trailer as it was moved to a private lot near its original location for the final three days of filming…………


- Never before has a friendly hug between two men received such attention and careful media dissection. When one of the huggers is the man destined to be the highest-profile free agent in baseball after the coming season, a hug is clearly not just a hug. St. Louis Cardinals star Albert Pujols shared a brief bear hug with Cubs general manager Jim Hendry before St. Louis' 6-4 win over Chicago at Wrigley Field on Tuesday and with the sports news cycle being the 24/7 beast it is, the hug was being broken down long before the game’s final out and a photo of the Hug Heard Round the World has caused wild speculation and a raft of conspiracy theories that the Cubs will be leading the pack in November, when the nine-time All-Star first baseman can officially become a free agent. Hendry himself expressed surprise that the exchange made national news, half-jokingly telling media members, "He hugged me first. He's a lot bigger and stronger than me." The GM added that he and Pujols were merely exchanging batting-cage plesantries rather than discussing financial terms of a potential contract offer. "I can't win," Hendry said. "I like Albert. We've always gotten along. He's a great, great player. I admire the heck out of him. He plays the game the right way every day." Baseball does have tampering rules preventing any team officials from conversing with players from other teams about contract-related matters and commissioner Bud Selig has levied fines and suspensions against owners and executives in the past for such offenses. MLB officials have also worked to discourage fraternization between members of rival organizations this spring, but sources say the league will not discipline Hendry or the Cubs for the hug. Hendry explained post-hug that he knows Pujols through two mutual friends: former Cardinals general manager Walt Jocketty and former pitcher Alan Benes, who threw for Hendry at Creighton and for the Cardinals. Pujols likewise downplayed the controversy over the hug, saying, "At the end, it's not what you do on the field. It's what kind of person you are off the field. That's the kind of relationship you want to build with somebody you respect. He's on the other side. I'm on our side. I just think it's kind of ridiculous. Three writers came and talked to me about that and the contract. Are you serious? C'mon." Serious? No? Ridiculous? Yes…………….


- What is the cost of a revolution? Check back once Egypt’s uprising is complete, but so far the cost of the revolt has (allegedly) been $3.5 billion, according to the country’s finance minister. That total supposedly takes into account all of the labor unrest and political protests that have seized Egypt and ultimately led to the ousting of President Hosni Mubarak. Demands for higher wages and ensuing strikes have been a big part of the revolution and have led to near-daily protests that continue in the Arab world’s most populous nation. Finance Minister Samir Radwan laid out the financial toll the saga has taken on his country and said the majority of the losses - $2.2 billion - were in the tourism sector. That part of the arguments is dubious and difficult to believe because who doesn’t want to vacation in a country embroiled in a bloody and bitter revolution wherein riots, gunfire and clashes with security forces are common? Getting shot can be a great bonding experience for a family. The country’s treasury has pledged several billion pounds in compensation and unemployment insurance to mitigate the losses sustained by Egyptians during the almost three-weeks of unrest before Mubarak was forced out of office. The offer of cash at some point, some time in the future has done little to placate Egyptians, who continue to complain that life has not come close to returning to normal. Radwan himself has been jet-setting to the U.S. and other countries begging for aid and attempting to lure investors back to the country. Exports remain down, manufacturing is operating at half its normal capacity and the government appears powerless to stop it. Asking the World Bank for $2.2 billion in “soft” loans and for between $3 billion and $4 billion in similar loans, “without conditions,” from the International Monetary Fund just seems desperate. Radwan insists the foundation of the Egyptian economy remains strong and that the government is working on a new law setting minimum and maximum wages linked to productivity, but how can anyone believe him at this point………….


- My, my. Google vs. Facebook is turning into quite a battle. Of course, we’re just now learning that it is in fact a battle with the two tech giants. The revelation came courtesy of Burson-Marsteller, a major public relations firm hired by Facebook to launch a negative campaign against Google's Social Circle. Burson-Marsteller has confirmed it was working on behalf of the social networking site and released a statement Tuesday saying it had away from the campaign because it went against the firm's policies and "should have been declined." The statement adds: "Now that Facebook has come forward, we can confirm that we undertook an assignment for that client. The client requested that its name be withheld on the grounds that it was merely asking to bring publicly available information to light and such information could then be independently and easily replicated by any media. Whatever the rationale, this was not at all standard operating procedure and is against our policies, and the assignment on those terms should have been declined. When talking to the media, we need to adhere to strict standards of transparency about clients, and this incident underscores the absolute importance of that principle." Sifting through all of the business speak, the bottom line is Facebook waging an expensive smear campaign against a competitor by hiring a public relations firm to plant negative stories. It is the sort of story one would expect to hear about in an ugly Senate or presidential campaign, not with two über-successful Web titans doing battle over who was going to win the battle to rip users’ personal data. Facebook’s smear campaign centered on the notion that Google Social Circle service violated user privacy and may have broken federal regulations. When those claims were examined more closely and determined to be false, questions were raised as to their origin. Before long, the trail led back to Facebook and Burson-Marsteller and Facebook finally gave up the charade and admitted to it reluctantly. Pulling such a stunt certainly makes Facebook look small, amateurish and insecure, something the most popular social networking site around probably did not intend to accomplish when it hatched this absurd plan…………


- Above all else, this explains why America remains the FAT-test nation on Earth and will continue to hold that title indefinitely. For as long as fabled California hamburger chain In-N-Out Burger has existed, it has remained a West Coast phenomenon. In-N-Out devotees rave about the food and the simplicity of the chain’s menu, which boasts few options yet is wildly popular because customers swear by the taste of the burgers themselves. Now, In-N-Out is moving out, as in moving out across the country and expanding past the West Coast. The chain opened two stores in Texas this week and judging from the immediate response, the two restaurants should be a smashing success. Rabid fans camped out (yes, you read that right) overnight at the Frisco In-N-Out location to be first in line when the doors opened as if they were one of the legion of dorks camping out at the theater for the release of a new Star Wars movie and lines stretching hundreds of feet away from the restaurant were a constant sight throughout the day. But the true gem is a one-plus-minute slice of video gold in which an unidentified woman talks openly of how emotional the experience of going to a burger joint and eating a Double Double is for her. She speaks openly of remembering her days living in California and how being at In-N-Out stirs up so many powerful emotions. About a minute into the clip, the woman is so overcome with emotion that she literally breaks down in tears and has a difficult time continuing her interview with a reporter from a local TV station. Seeing a person brought to tears by a slab of greasy, fatty beef on a bun tells you everything you need to know about why Americans are head and shoulders (and waistlines) above the rest of the world in girth. Save all of the explanations about what a strong psychological link food can have to certain times and memories in life because the bottom line is, unless the last meal you ever ate with a loved one before an untimely passing was at a particular eatery, then a fast-food meal should not bring you to tears………….

Canadian geese attack, science again discovers the obvious and Liam Gallagher stil and a-hole

- For far too long now, Canadian geese have been getting the short end of nature’s stick. Because they’re Canadian, people assume they eat nothing but round bacon, say “Eh” and “Aboot” all the time and watch nothing but hockey while rocking mullets and ugly denim jackets. Canadian geese have heard those ugly stereotypes, calmly taken it all in and silently plotted their revenge. They’ve used all of those hateful words as fuel and now, their retaliation has begun in earnest. The first strike came Tuesday evening in Bay County, Fla., where a 12-pound Canada goose went kamikaze on the windshield of a sport utility vehicle as a woman drove east on U.S. 10. The woman told police she was driving her Chevrolet Tahoe around 6 p.m. when the goose suddenly swooped in front of her. Showing the true kamikaze spirit, the bold bird flung itself through the vehicle’s windshield on the driver's side and ended up, dead, in the far rear of the SUV. Williams Township assistant fire chief Craig Pickelman confirmed that the unidentified driver suffered cuts on her face that appeared minor and was taken to Bay Regional Medical Center for precautionary reasons. To the casual observer, this might be just a random coincidence of one wayward bird having a chance encounter with a speeding care on a major U.S. interstate, but to the trained observer, it’s much more. It is the signal of an oncoming war of attrition, one whose warning shot was fired a few years ago when another brave Canadian goose plowed into the face of male model/margarine salesman Fabio as he tried to enjoy a fun ride on a roller coaster. Know this, world: Canadian geese are mad as hell and they’re not going to take it any longer………….


- Science, thanks for getting back to what you do best: reaffirming blatantly obvious things everyone already knows and agrees on. Telling the world that infants who are exposed to marital discord are more likely to have trouble sleeping during infancy and when they approach the toddler stage does that very thing better than just about any study could hope to. In wasting both time and research dollars digging into an issue no one was disputing, researchers evaluated more than 350 families when their babies were 9 months old and 18 months old, with all the babies having been adopted because the scientists wanted to eliminate the chance that any behaviors between parents and kids were caused by shared genes or personality characteristics. After conducting their groundbreaking research, these alleged scientists “discovered” instability in the parents’ relationship when the children were 9 months old predicted the babies would have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep when they were 18 months old. Their initial goal - other than seeing how much time and money they could waste before being shut down - was supposedly to discover whether marital instability -- for example, parents contemplating divorce -- might be related to the children’s sleep problems later in their lives. It is an amazing hypothesis because who would ever imagine that loud arguments, shouting and disruptions in a child’s formative months as a baby would stick with them going forward? Marital instability was ranked using a standard four-point research measure, with couples individually asked questions such as, “Has the thought of separating or getting a divorce crossed your mind?” Examining the possibility that changes in brain systems involved in development of sleep patterns might reflect the impact of stress in the family on very young kids would seem like a waste of time in that respect, but let’s hear from the researchers before deciding. “Our findings suggest that the effects of marital instability on children’s sleep problems emerge earlier in development than has been demonstrated previously,” says study researcher Anne M. Mannering, PhD, an instructor of human development at Oregon State University. “Parents should be aware that marital stress may affect the well-being of their children even in the first year or two of life. If these problems persist, they can correlate with problems in school, inattention and behavioral issues.” Nope, still a waste of time. The party being suckered out of its research money was the National Institutes of Health. Mannering says the study is the first done on the link between marital issues and infant sleep, which makes sense because finding a sham of a researcher with the kahones to throw away time and money at something so obvious isn't easy to do. Should you have an interest in reading more about how Mannering and her team arrived at the most obvious conclusion since everyone agreed that Jimmy Hendrix fellow was pretty good with a guitar, check out the study in published form in the last issue of Child Development……………


- So, is former Oasis frontman and current Beady Eye band leader Liam Gallagher still one of the most pompous a-holes in all of rock and roll? For a definitive answer to that question, let’s check in with Mr. Gallagher after performing at last week’s Glastonbury Festival. After performing at the Worthy Farm events with his decidedly less-talented, less successful and much worse new band, Gallagher vowed he is "never going there again" in reference to the festival. "The sound is sh*t and really quiet and now it's like Bond Street with mud, with loads of celebrities walking around in their boots and umbrellas. I'm not having it." Bond Street, for those not in the know, is well-known for celebrity spottings and Gallagher clearly feels the festival has turned into some sort of elitist gathering, topped off with a crappy sound system. He isn't the first Gallagher brother to rip Michael Eavis' festival, with brother Noel (the most popular target of Liam’s rants lately dating back to their time in Oasis) having ripped the festival back in 2008 for booking Jay-Z as a headliner, saying the booking of a rapper to headline a night of the event "wrong.” Beady Eye’s set at the festival was the first time either of the Gallagher brothers had played Glastonbury since 2004, when Oasis headlined the Pyramid Stage. Perhaps Liam Gallagher and Beady Eye will have more success on the remainder of their jaunt around the U.K. festival circuit this summer as they play at Somerset House, T In The Park and Reading And Leeds Festival. The criticisms of Glastonbury won't come as a surprise to anyone familiar with Liam Gallagher’s act and needless to say he has once more reaffirmed his status as rock’s top d-bag, although calling what Beady Eye does on stage rock is something of a stretch………….


- This is definitely new. The Man has tried all manner of pathetic, ridiculous tactics to stamp out protests and uprisings over the years, everything from tear gas to water cannons, truncheons to rubber bullets and every other imaginable weapon, even canines. But leave it to Ugandan police to come up with a bizarre new tactic, spraying opposition leaders with a pink liquid on Tuesday to stop them from holding a banned rally in the nation’s capital of Kampala. Opposition politician Olara Otunnu was among those blasted with the mysterious pink spray, which police refused to identify the nature or composition of. Otunnu called the incident the "latest installment" of President Yoweri Museveni's "brutality and atrocity.” After drenching the crowd with the peculiar pink spray, police also arrested Democratic Party leader Norbert Mao, another of the events leaders. The conflict in Uganda is not so different from those raging in nations across the Middle East and Africa, with the people angry at those in power and of the belief that the man currently presiding over their country is not its legitimate leader. Museveni, who has been in office for 25 years, is due to be sworn in again as president on Thursday even though many Ugandans support main opposition leader Kizza Besigye’s contention that the vote was rigged. The odds of the vote being legitimate seem low given the outpouring of anger directed at Museveni and the manner in which he has responded, but either way he seems unlikely to step down willingly and recognize the will of the people bold enough to step up and speak out against him. In other words, he’ll follow in the weak footsteps of dictators like Iran’s Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Zimbabwe’s Bob Mugabe and others…………


- The upper hand didn’t last very long for the University of Michigan football program. The Wolverines were feeling mighty good about themselves not on the basis of anything they had done on the field the past three seasons or so, but simply because their biggest rivals were in the middle of a colossal sh*t storm of NCAA violations and issues. Ohio State being revealed as a shady, dirty program with a coach who was proving to be one of the biggest hypocrites in a college football world full of them. Those facts are still true, but Michigan isn't exactly painting itself in the most favorable light, not with UM wide receiver Darryl Stonum getting arrested Friday morning on suspicion of drunken driving, the day before the school announced he had been suspended indefinitely. Coach Brady Hoke said only that Stonum had made a "poor decision" and was being disciplined when he announced the suspension. However, Diane Brown of the University of Michigan police confirmed that Stonum was arrested around 2:25 a.m. on Friday on suspicion of operating while under the influence. One player driving drunk isn't the same as an entire program being out of control and operating outside the rules, but just to be safe, the Wolverines probably should have refrained from having any of their players arrested or suspended for a few weeks just so people could fully embrace them as having the moral high ground on the Buckeyes. Stonum was a starter for the Wolverines last season as a junior and ranked second on the team in receptions and yards receiving. For his career, he has 76 career receptions for 1,008 yards and six touchdowns. Whether or not he adds to those totals and by how much is up to Hoke, who will have to decide how many games of suspension a drunk driving arrest merits. Hope being morally superior was fun while it lasted, UM fans and alumni………….

Welcoming neighbors, Google's new music service and dangerous football helmets

- Everyone greets a new neighbor in their neighborhood differently. Some people throw a “Welcome to the neighborhood party,” others bake a pie to take to the newcomer’s home and many don’t even bother getting to know that person because they’re so engrossed in their own life. None of those welcoming methods appealed to an unidentified Amherst, Mass. man whose new neighbor clearly wasn’t what he was hoping for. That neighbor is the Jaffarya Center, a recently-built mosque on Transit Road in Amherst. Having any public building next door is rarely ideal for a homeowner based on the sheer volume of people coming and going, along with a higher-than-usual noise quotient. But that doesn’t explain this intolerant homeowner tossing up a sign reading, “Bomb-making, next driveway.” Hmm, if a person didn’t know better, they might view that as a bigoted, discriminatory sign suggesting that all Muslims are terrorist fanatics looking to blow people and buildings up. Not exactly the way to welcome someone to the ‘hood, anonymous Amherst homeowner. Whether you are a Muslim or not, whether you view Islam as a legitimate religion or not, even if you dislike Islam, that sign is out of bounds. While the First Amendment might give a person the right to post that sort of spiteful speech, that doesn’t make it the right thing to do. Fortunately for this ignoramus, the director of the Jaffarya Center (and probably its lead terrorist in the sign maker’s mind) is much more intelligent and mature than he or she is. "I love my neighbor, and I pray for him," said Dr. Syad Jaffri. Neighbors confirmed the sign was posted over the weekend by a neighbor who was reportedly upset about the building's lighting and that it was so close to his home. The issue was quickly brought to the attention of Amherst Town Supervisor Dr. Barry Weinstein, who confirmed that he's aware of the issue. "It is inappropriate, but it is the resident's free speech prerogative to put up a sign and it's the same free speech that we all hold so dearly," said Weinstein. Local Muslim leaders and media members have knocked on the door of the sign maker and no one has answered, so the other side of this story has yet to be told. For what it’s worth, the town planning department has not found any violations with the building and says the lighting was built according to code. The Amherst Police are also involved in the matter, but it all seems like a bit of overkill on account of one misanthropic kook…………


- Assuming the NFL is serious about improving player safety and eliminating dangerous hits and concussions from the game, wouldn’t it do a better job of ensuring its players have the best equipment possible? Not according to a new study by Virginia Tech researchers, who found that nearly 40 percent of NFL players last season wore a helmet model that got the second-lowest rating for reducing the risk of concussions. The Riddell VSR-4 helmet received just one star in a study of football helmets led by Virginia Tech professor of biomedical engineering Stefan Duma. The study awarded a top rating of five stars to just one helmet, the Revolution Speed, while five models -- two made by Riddell, two by Schutt and one by Xenith -- received four stars. Yet 38 percent of the league’s players wore the low-rated VSR-4 in 2010 and the company confirmed that 39 percent wore one of the various models that fall under the Riddell Revolution name or the new Riddell 360. So why not spend some of the league’s $9 billion in annual revenues to buy the best, safest helmets? NFL spokesman Greg Aiello confirmed the league’s awareness of the study and said the league's head neck and spine medical committee would review the research. He also claimed the league and NFL Players Association informed players, trainers and equipment managers last year that three helmet models -- two made by Riddell and one by Schutt -- met all three criteria for qualifying as a top-performing helmet when 16 were tested. The league and NFLPA told players and teams at the time: "In general, some of the modern helmets performed better in these tests than did the older helmets." The news was actually welcomed publicly by Riddell, which was interesting. "It is our hope that based upon this and other independent research, that players and teams at all levels will continue to migrate to the Revolution family of helmets," Riddell Sports president Dan Arment said in a statement. Ultimately, each NFL player is allowed to choose which brand and model of helmet he wears and thus there is no way a player can blame anyone but himself for inferior equipment in that respect. Still, why is the league even making inferior helmets an option? Riddell stopped selling the VSR-4 in 2010 and the newer Revolution models include significant changes from the VSR-4, such as covering the jaw area and having padding there, as well as adding padding to increase the space between the head and the shell. Seventy-five percent of helmets used in 2010 were made by Riddell, which has had a licensing/sponsorship agreement with the league since 1990, with a handful of other manufacturers making the remaining 25 percent. Duma and his team used eight years’ worth of data for their study and said the star ratings provide "a prediction of concussion risk." Concussions, of course, are bruises on the brain which occur when the brain moves inside the skull from an impact or a whiplash effect. While no one involved in the discussion believes it is possible to eliminate them from football, research like Duma and his team’s study could help reduce their prevalence and for a league supposedly focused on improving player safety and long-term health, that should be great news……….


- Party time in Cuba, woo hoo! Okay, so technically it’s less of a party and more of the communist island nation embracing realities of everyday life that the rest of the civilized world has counted on for years, but when the brothers Castro are running your country you must take what you can get in terms of progress. Progress in this case is legalizing the sale of real estate and cars and expanding the ranks of private co-operatives that could serve as boosts for the country’s sagging economy. The Communist Party's newly released economic guidelines also teased the possibility of the government allowing Cubans travel abroad as tourists, a long-time promise of Cuba's leaders that has yet to be fulfilled. For now, the government will (allegedly) study that possibility. Letting Cubans out of the country as tourists has always been risky because even when the country’s athletic teams have traveled to international competitions in other countries, the risk for defections has been high. Cubans have been waiting for decades for the travel ban to be lifted, but the newly minted guidelines provided few specifics, meaning everyone will have to wait to see the exact details when the strategy is eventually translated into law by Cuba's National Assembly. To add another layer of bureaucracy to the mix, the guidelines also established a commission charged with implementing the changes. It definitely seems like a desperation move to placate the populace on account of a floundering economy. A meeting of the Communist Party Congress last month produced the economic changes, but the final documentation wasn’t released until Monday. And boy, what a whopper of a document it is. In all, there are 313 individual points. Among them are points stipulating that the state "establish the buying and selling of homes" for Cuban citizens and another calling for legalizing the sale of cars and other vehicles. However, the guidelines also stipulate that the state is not yet in a position to sell most Cubans new cars through state-owned businesses. Under the previous laws, only cars built before the revolution could be sold, as in thousands of Soviet-made Ladas and Moscoviches, as well as tiny Polskis and other cars used in the former Eastern bloc. Owners of those cars have basically been stuck with them until either they or the car die. In other words, anyone in need of late model, Soviet-made Moscovich, a glut of them will soon hit the market……….


- Ratings for the first post-Steve Carell edition of NBC’s hit comedy The Office were down significantly from Carell’s final episode, even with Will Ferrell continuing his guest stint. So what is the Peacock to do? A slew of guest stars are planned for the final few episodes of the season, with the lineup including Ricky Gervais, Jim Carrey, Will Arnett and Ray Romano. But will those four household names be enough to steady ratings? If not, NBC has another ace in the hole that could “buy” it some time: none other than the Oracle of Omaha himself, billionaire investor and chief executive of Berkshire Hathaway Warren E. Buffett. Buffett, whose investors were treated to a taped performance by Carell and his Office colleagues at the company’s annual shareholders meeting, which occurred two days after Carell’s farewell episode. Buffett will now return the favor by appearing in the May 19 season finale of the series. In a bit of a stretch, he will play one of many characters seeking the vacated regional manager’s post made available by the departure of Carell’s Michael Scott character. In the sketch that aired at Berkshire Hathaway’s shareholder’s meeting, Michael Scott introduced Mr. Buffett to his “Office” colleagues as his potential replacement and explained that Berkshire Hathaway was best known for producing all of Anne Hathaway’s movies. Another favorite Office character, Rainn Wilson’s Dwight Schrute, picked a fight with Mr. Buffett’s partner Charlie Munger. Buffett also played a similar character to the one he’ll portray on the show. The connection between Buffett and The Office is Stephen B. Burke, the chief executive of NBC Universal and a Berkshire Hathaway board member. Adding one of America’s wealthiest people to the mix should generate a bit of buzz for the show, but Buffett hasn’t exactly shown a golden touch in shows he’s appeared on in the past. He did multiple guest spots on the ABC soap opera “All My Children” and needless to say, he wasn’t able to do anything to reverse the show’s (and the entire soap opera genre’s) slide into oblivion. After all, had NBC merely filmed Buffett’s guest spot and not publicized it at all, most Office viewers probably would have had no idea who he was or why he was on the show at all………..


- Agreements with all the major labels or not, Google is moving ahead with its new music service as planned. Much like Amazon before it, the Web giant has unveiled its digital music locker service without any licensing deals at all. The unveiling came Tuesday during a keynote speech at Google’s I/O conference in San Francisco. Called Music Beta by Google, the service will allow users to upload their music library to a personal online storage locker they can then use like any other cloud computing system, streaming and downloading files from any Internet connected device. Based on the details Google has provided, Music Beta is eerily similar to Amazon's Cloud Drive, with a few key differences. The biggest catch, at least in the United States, is that the service will be available on a limited, invite-only basis. Anyone wanting an invitation can request one at google.music.com, with priority given to those already in Google’s user base with the Motorola Xoom tablet, and to attendees of the I/O conference. Those with larger music libraries will also run into problems because Google is limiting the number of songs that can be uploaded to the music locker to 20,000. On the upside, the service is free while in beta, although Google refused comment on what future pricing options it may have planned. On some level, the whole announcement felt incomplete and it was clear Music Beta is not the service Google originally envisioned. Google director of content partnerships Zahavah Levine pulled no punches in assessing blame for that, either. "We've been in negotiations with the industry for a different set of features, with mixed results," she stated Monday night. "[But] a couple of major labels were less focused on innovation and more on demanding unreasonable and unsustainable business terms." Sources have pointed to Sony Music Group and Universal Music Group as primary roadblocks to Google’s initial plan to offer a scan-and-match style locker service -- where instead of uploading different copies of the same track to store in a locker for each user, the service would scan users' libraries and match the songs they own to a centralized server. Those holding rights for the songs, i.e. the labels in question, would then be paid a fee for each stream. Instead, Google is moving forward with a diluted version of its original idea and teaming it up with its new music player app, also unveiled Tuesday. Anyone with an Android device can download the app, which can play any music stored on Android devices and access music from the cloud for users who are part of the beta. Completion of the app was essential to the launch of Music Beta, according to insiders. One interesting feature of the app is Instant Mix, which creates a playlist based on a single song by analyzing the song's characteristics and pulls other similar songs from the users' music library. Music Beta has interesting features of its own, including: allowing any Web-connected device with a browser or supporting Flash to stream music from the locker, free music added in the same way some mp3 players ship with sample tracks and allowing audio quality for streaming files as high as 320kbps if the device and network support it. By announcing all of this without the major labels on board, Google is clearly signaling a “Get on board or get left behind” approach to business……….

Everyone doesn't love Bieber, allegations of genie-summoning in Iran and cowards play for the Miami Heat

- Wha…..wait. Not everyone is down with a chance to hang out with the musical luminary that is 8-year-old Canadian pop-singing chick Justin Bieber? Clearly not, because in the aftermath of Biebs’ guest spot on CBS’s drama “CSI,” star Marg Helgenberger laid the weak-voiced popster out in a radio interview. "I probably shouldn't say this, but he was kind of a brat," Helgenberger said. "He locked one of the producers in a closet. And he put his fist through a cake that was on the craft services table." Those actions would definitely qualify a person as a brat, assuming the individual making those observations is north of 50 years old and still uses terms like brat. Neither the show nor Bieber’s representatives responded to requests for comment, but Bieber took to Twitter (of course) to defend himself against Helgenberger’s claims. "It's kinda lame when someone you met briefly and never worked with comments on you. I will continue to wish them luck and be kind. #killemwithkindness," he tweeted. "Even last week they had me scolded on a plane in the news because i wasnt in my seat fast enough. She was right and i sat down. That's news? I know who i am and sometimes people r just going 2 say what they want. Keep ur head up and be the man ur mama raised. #killemwithkindness.” Good to know your mom taught you to ruin food left out on the craft services table for everyone on set to enjoy, Biebs. "Rumors are just that ... rumors," Bieber continued. "In the end if you just be kind and be yourself people will know who you are. That goes for anyone i think. as for now ... we are in the JUNGLE!! Dont spread gossip and dont spread rumors about others ... im a kid and i know that. #respect." For some reason, he chased that tweet with another containing a video clip of "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" from "The Lion King." Bro, you realize the jungle analogy is a huge reach, right? You’re a bad pop singer enjoying the requisite 15 minutes of fame and parlaying them into acting opportunities. Don’t look for a third guest spot on “CSI” because unless your appearance ends with Helgenberger putting a fake bullet through your mop-haired head, she seems unlikely to be amenable to the idea and offending one of your stars isn't the best approach for a show runner…………


- Welcome to the club, Georgia! Arizona founded it last year by implementing its controversial immigration law that became a flashpoint for an entire nation and now the Peach State is joining up with Republican Gov. Nathan Deal expected to sign Georgia's own immigration bill into law this week. The legislation would allow police to investigate the immigration status of certain suspects and severely punish those who transport or harbor illegal immigrants in the state. Supporters of the bill insist illegal immigrants are consuming valuable state resources, including schools, hospitals and jails. They continue to hammer a recent Pew Hispanic Center estimate that says Georgia is home to 425,000 illegal immigrants - more than those in Arizona. Yet the study isn't winning over opponents of the bill, who fear Georgia could suffer the same economic impacts that Arizona felt last year after implementing the nation’s strictest immigration law. Tourism officials worry the measure could lead to tourists avoiding the state to protest what they perceive as an unfair targeting of immigrants. According to the Arizona Hotel & Lodging Association, Arizona has lost $141 million in direct spending, along with 2,761 jobs and $9.4 million in tax revenue as a result of its immigration law, including some 40 conventions it was to host. Georgia could have had some company in joining this dubious club had Florida stepped up with its own immigration bill, but the state’s legislature adjourned Saturday without an agreement on a tough immigration bill sought by the governor and attorney general. Utah (yes, Utah) is also on the verge of putting its own immigration law in place, but a civil rights group has filed for a preliminary injunction to block the start of the law on Tuesday. Aside from zeroing in on any one state and the nuances of its particular immigration law, a wider view of the issue makes it clear that this is something there will be more of going forward, not less…………


- This time around, Sony was prepared. A second attack on the company’s servers over the weekend was allegedly planned, but Sony’s heightened security after a network breach for its PlayStation Network was apparently enough to fend off the would-be attackers. The group’s plan was allegedly to retaliate for Sony’s handling of the PlayStation Network breach by staging another attack on Sony, this time on an unspecified company Web site, with the goal of posting any information they could find somewhere online. The plan was discussed on an Internet Relay Chat channel the group uses, but someone apparently tipped Sony off to the potential attack, "Apparently Sony saw that article because the last server that I could access is offline now...its probbaly (sic) being patched like the other servers. There goes our window," one would-be attacker wrote. By securing its remaining servers this group claims it had access to, Sony was able to cut off any avenues for another attack. Reports of the possible attack surfaced Thursday and Sony clearly kept its surveillance eyes and ears open from that point on. No one has publicly taken credit for the PlayStation network attacks, but the prime suspect in the case - the hacker group Anonymous - has denied involvement. Sony still hasn’t brought the PlayStation network back online, saying it is still not secure enough to bring back yet. A company spokesman said the company was still trying to grasp the breadth and depth of the initial attack and that investigation is the primary cause for the delay in rebuilding the network. PSN, Qriocity, and Sony Online remain offline and will stay that way until Sony completes a total rebuild of the security systems. That seems wise, what with the personal information of more than 100 million Sony customers exposed in the breach. To compensate for that major glitch, Sony has promised to compensate customers with free ID theft monitoring, as well as free content and 30 days of free access to the premium version of PSN. The company also confirmed Saturday that it had removed the names of 2,500 entrants to a 2001 Sony contest with partial addresses that had been copied from an old part of the company's Web site and posted online. Having said all of that, the one thing most PlayStation users want at this point is to be able to go online and game with their digital friends again…………


- When one is a brutal, fascist dictator ruling a Middle East nation with an iron fist of terror, being linked to black magic, witchcraft and the summoning of genies isn't exactly good for business, so to speak. Yet as an increasingly bitter rift between Iranian dictator Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and the country's supreme religious leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamanei, those allegations are being lodged against Ahmadinejad and some of his associates by Iran's powerful clerics. No less than 25 confidants of Ahmadinejad and his controversial chief of staff Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei have been arrested and charged with being "magicians” in the past few days. The conservative Iranian newspaper Ayandeh described one aide, Abbas Ghaffari, as "a man with special skills in metaphysics and connections with unknown worlds." Those connections allegedly include summoning a genie who caused his interrogator to have a heart attack. It’s an absurdly over-the-top story, but it underscores just how bitter the fight forward Ahmadinejad and Khamanei has become in a country where religious issues are always at the forefront. Building a smear campaign based on supernatural allegations is unquestionably risky and many critics wonder if the tactic won't backfire on the clerics. That is double true in Iran, where the cleric-based model of religion is losing its foundation and traditional beliefs that incorporate ideas about a coming messiah, the end of the world and traditional magic concepts like genies, are becoming increasingly popular especially with Ahmadinejad's supporters. In fact, the dictator himself has made supernatural claims in the past, telling followers in 2005 that he was surrounded by a halo of light during a speech to the U.N. General Assembly in which the foreign leaders in the hall were entranced, unable to blink for a half hour. Mashaei has long been a target for Iran’s religious establishment due to his position as the man behind much of Ahmadinejad's political and religious thinking. He practices an alternative Messianic version of Islam that includes aspects of the occult and a seeks a much more limited role for clerics. The common belief within Iran is that Ahmadinejad wants Mashaei to succeed him as the country’s political leader - whenever he kicks the bucket and can no longer be dictator for life, of course. The actual skirmish between Ahmadinejad and Khamanei began two weeks ago, when Ahmadinejad fired Abdulhassan Banisadr, accusing the intelligence minister of being a spy who fed information to the supreme leader about Mashaei. Khamenei undermined Ahmadinejad by reinstating Banisadr immediately, leading to a weeklong boycott of official duties by Ahmadinejad. Buying into any Ahmadinejad conspiracy theory is risky, but it is possible to see how the religious establishment would fear the possible ascension to power of a man like Mashaei given his desire for drastically reducing their sphere of influence in Iran. That a political rift has grown so rapidly and added a spiritual component is noteworthy, although the entire situation could just be a giant smoke screen designed to sell the rest of the world on a fractured, weakened Iranian regime in order to throw everyone off the track as Ahmadinejad pushes the country’s nuclear program to a point where it can legitimately nuke Israel off the map and commence World War IIIO…………


- A six-year, $110.1 million contract just doesn’t buy an NBA team what it used to. In the good old days (a few years ago), that kind of contract would go to a guy who was a franchise player, a mentally tough cornerstone upon which you could build a franchise. Now…….it buys you a fragile, mentally weak, borderline All-Star who can be rattled by something as simple as a hype video scored by the “Rocky” theme played on an arena videoboard prior to a game. The alleged superstar in question is Miami Heat forward Chris Bosh, who turned in perhaps his worst game of the season, a six-point, five-rebound effort in 30 minutes in the Heat's 97-81 blowout loss to the Celtics in Game 3 of their Eastern Conference semifinal series in Boston. Bosh isn't necessarily renowned for showing up large in big games, but his effort on Saturday night as especially lackluster. Explaining his terrible performance would have been tough had Bosh himself not laid it out after the game. "Given all the elements that were out there last night ... they were so hyped," Bosh said. "My emotions got the best of me early on and it kind of dictated what I was doing for the rest of the game." He cited the video prior to the game in which the Celtics were shown outside their locker room jumping up and down as the theme from “Rocky” blared from the loud speakers. He also pointed to the raucous crowd at TD Garden as a reason he was rattled and admitted that when he hesitated and passed up the open jumper on Miami’s first possession, it got inside his head for the remainder of the game. Celtics forward Kevin Garnett worked Bosh over to the tune of 28 points and 18 rebounds, and was ineffective on the offensive end and left the weak link in the Heat’s supposed big three fumbling for answers. "I was not trusting my game," Bosh said. "The toughest thing to do in hostile environments is not just to trust your teammates but to trust yourself. Trust things you've been doing all your life." Wait, so one hype video and a rowdy crowd were enough to make you question things you’ve done your whole life? Not that the Heat are going to rise or fall on Bosh’s performance as they chase the elusive championship Bosh, LeBron James and Dwyane Wade came together in Miami to chase, but that doesn’t excuse Bosh wilting under no real pressure and admitting to it after the fact…………